25. I deliver t-shirts and printed goods for a small company. One day, I had to go downtown to a lawyer’s office. It was midday and there was a particularly awesome comeback being made by the Atlanta Braves that day against the Cincinnati Reds.
I am waiting in the office with the secretary listening to the game on the radio. He wouldn't help me until the game was over (it was the last at bat). The Braves' Brooks Conrad ends up hitting a walk off grand slam. The secretary went bonkers and started running around the office screaming, "GRAND SLAM CONRAD, GRAND SLAM CONRAD!", for at least a minute. He proceeded to hug me since I was wearing a Braves hat.
26. Delivered pizzas to a house late one night some douche opens the door naked holding a cowboy hat over his junk and denies ordering pizza. I say, "Maybe one of your friends ordered?" He yells, "Anyone order pizza?" Dude walks out of the kitchen with what looked like whipped cream or shaving cream on his junk and says, "I think you got the wrong house."
So I left.
27. I was delivering pizza to a condo that had locked gates that I couldn't get in. I parked on the side of the road and when I got back in the car a security guard ran up and told me I couldn't leave. Confused, I ask why not and he says that the tow truck is already on it's way for my car. I tell him, "No thanks, I'll just drive it away" and drove away as he looked confused.
28. I used to run a moving company in South Boston. We were a budget company, so most folks (in excess of 90%) did their own packing, and we just shlepped their stuff from point A to B.
One time this lady had a super heavy, refrigerator sized box (in excess of 100lbs by a good bit) that was just covered in duct tape and packing tape. As I got it through the doorframe, I caught it on something metal and the box ripped apart.
Out came no less than 347 dildos, one of which was about the dimensions of an average Boston fire hydrant, and another that was literally mounted to what appeared to be a small jackhammer, as well as a male sex doll and a disassembled Sybian.
I was moving her into a really nice house in West Newton. All she said was, "Please, don't judge me." I just said, "Do you happen to have any gloves? I'll help you with this and we need not speak of it again."
Thousand dollar tip at the end of that job.