6. Family attorney
Everything is practically the same. Money, kids, earnings, allegations - nothing is unique.
If you can put away your bullcrap and relish the fact that you are no longer going to be with this person you don't want to be with, let's make it easy. I've had complex divorces go super easy, and I've had simple ones drag on for years out of spite.
Listen. To. Your. Attorney. You know what a good attorney does if he finds himself in a legal predicament? Gets an attorney. You're paying for his experience in the system.
Almost guaranteed, if you go to trial, you will leave with less than you hoped for. You can 99% of the time get something better and cheaper if you agree.
We don't want your case any longer than you do. If you have unrealistic goals and refuse to listen to our counsel, we will gladly bill you for the time. Most calls between attorneys start out "what does your client want to do?" followed by, "I've told my client this but they want to do that". 90% of the time I know and the other attorney will know exactly how the court is going to rule. I have had countless hearings where we should have everything settled, one side won't agree, and we'll go and tell the judge the impasse and that we're gonna put on this little bit of testimony and let the judge rule. Congrats, that's three hours billable.
If you are going to trial: in most places, family law is like a weird office setting. It's the same attorneys interacting with each other on a weekly to daily basis. Same with the judges. I inform my clients they are to be respectful of the other attorney and the entire court staff. These are people I have ongoing business relationships with. If you see me having a friendly conversation with the other attorney prior to the hearing or even during a recess, we are not conspiring against you or just trying to milk you for all you have. Same thing, if you see the other attorney speaking with the judge, don't assume you are getting the shaft - they are likely social with the judge outside the courtroom, like I am. If you have dedicated family judge, and your attorney isn't on a good relationship with them, find another one.
And please don't call me. If you have an emergency, talk to my assistant. She will determine if it is an emergency. It likely isn't. I will call you by the end of tomorrow.
7. Asked a friend about this once.
He said how many people come in peacefully together. It's not the big standard and it's not everyone, but it happens "way more than you'd expect". Both spouses just want the divorce and to move on, apparently it happens quite a bit. He said that sometimes they'll devolve into... (Continued)