"Pretty positive I'm not."
"When was the last time you had sexual intercourse?"
"NEVER?!" At this point he's suddenly whipped around to face me from his clipboard. "Oh, hah, wow, that simplifies things a lot."
11. For science!
Probably not the most embarrassing, but happened recently.
The last time I was at my doctor's office I was kept waiting in the exam room for a really long time. Like long enough to go through all three magazines in the room. Eventually severe boredom set in and I started looking for other things to do.
There was a scale in the corner, so I thought let's weigh some stuff. I started with my shoes, and eventually moved on to the magazines and my clothes. When I ran out of personal stuff, I surveyed the room and decided that I would like to know how much a chair weighs, so on the scale it went.
This is the exact moment the doctor and her resident decide to enter the room. There I am wearing nothing but a hospital gown and socks balancing a chair on the scale...
12. No apology necessary my boy.
I went to the hospital when I was as teenager and my doctor was rather attractive. She had to check me for testicular cancer. The room was curtained off and my parents were waiting right on the other side, in earshot.
She was looking away when I pulled my pants down and she said, "Oh my god," in an annoyed voice when she turned to find my junk out. I thought I had done something wrong and said sorry. As it turned out, my pork and beans hadn't been what had annoyed her, it was that her beeper had gone off (I guess she had been extremely busy).
The story isn't too embarrassing at face value, until you realize my parents could hear but not see this short exchange. I don't want to imagine what they thought caused a pubescent teenager to have to apologize to a hot doctor examining his testicles.
13. Zigged when you should have zagged...
I was at the doctor's office for a physical before my freshman year of college. The doctor was this assertive and intimidating female, and it came time for the hernia check. Now, for my whole life this procedure involved the doctor cupping a testicle and asking me to cough. However, I guess they only need to feel just above the genitals (where my ovaries would be if I was female) these days, but I was not aware.
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