Kids these days are always getting up to something... Swinging the Wii controller at the TV, washing the dog with dish soap, eating their own poop just to see what it tastes like, the list goes on and on. But every once in a while a kid does something that puts even the most confident and relaxed parent into a tizzy.
Parents on Reddit were asked: "What is the weirdest or creepiest thing you found out about your child, but you never will tell them that you found out?" These are some of the best answers.
1. This is terrifying
After dating my [significant other] for a couple months, his 5 year old daughter and I were sitting on the couch together. She started to rub my stomach and said she wished I was her real mom. The creepy part was, she followed it up with, "Maybe we could cut your stomach open and put me inside, then we can sew you back up and wait until I pop out." Yeah it was sweet in a very very creepy way.
2. Exorcise that house immediately
I was running late coming home from work one day by a few hours. My wife couldn't get a hold of me and was beginning to worry. Then my 3yr old son went to the window and said "I see daddy in the car!" My wife went to the window and no one was there. When my wife asked him where I was he responded "He's a ghost" then smiled and walked away.
3. What else has she seen?
We were preparing for our first beach trip, and I was trying to explain to my daughter, then about 2, about the beach. I said something like "It's a lot of sand, and big blue water!" And she said, I'll never forget it, so matter of factly, (I don't think she was even looking at me) "I know what a beach is, I was there a long time ago, before I was in your tummy."
4. Ugh kids are disgusting
My daughter use to always stir her water cups with her index finger. I thought she liked to watch the water go around. She was also notorious for stealing other people's water. One day I take a drink of MY water and it taste funny. I usually check for back wash and saw nothing. Later I see her stirring my cup that I deserted on the coffee table and asked her stop sticking her fingers in other people's cups. I asked "Why do you do that anyways?"
"I like to stick my finger in my butt and drink the water."
I will never tell her she use to drink butt water and liked if. Then on when I saw her sniffing her fingers, I'd yell at her to wash her hands. Kids are gross.
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