1. My nose was super clogged from a head cold, and I hate blowing my nose in front of my students. I have a closet in the back of the room that I escape to to release some of the pressure. At home, my husband and I joke that when I blow my nose it feels like parts of my brain are coming out too from all the pressure release. One thing lead to another, and I casually mentioned I was heading to the closet to "blow my brains out". The students were understandably concerned.
2. As a camp counselor I was kind of absentminded when the kids were telling me stories one day. One told me that he had fainted once from heat stroke. While listening I was thinking out loud and said, "what if you actually died that day and we're all actually just waiting in purgatory?"
There was an awkward silence and the boy said, "Ms. Mae, I don't like that."
3. I had a group of lazy AP kids a few years ago and at progress report time, about 2/3 were failing. I read them the riot act explaining that I wouldn't round up their grades at the end of the quarter to a D- just so they'd pass. I kept saying, "I'm not going to just give you the D, you need to earn the D". The kids held out the first two times I said it, but the third they started giggling and I heard it and we all laughed to the point of crying. Ugh. It was worse than the time I said I was going to Netflix and chill with my cat one weekend because I didn't know what that meant yet. I'm a woman in my early 30's.
4. I had a math professor who would come into class everyday and start writing on the board. He'd get right into it everyday go the whole lesson without stopping. He had a bad gas problem and would fart while teaching sometimes loud sometimes soft. I didn't know who it was at first me and my buddy would sit in the back and giggle. Once we started failing the class we started sitting in the front and paying attention. And that's when we found out... (Continued)