20 People Were Asked: 'What's Your Craziest Black Out Drunk Experience?'
I don't know about you but when some of my friends start drinking there's no going back. Throw in TGIF and payday, and you're looking at an epic night ahead of you.
People on Reddit were asked: "What's the craziest black out drunk experience you've ever been told you've done?" These are some of the best responses.
1. Got completely destroyed on an impromtu pub crawl, woke up in another country. Apparently the ferry from Stockholm to Turku is perfectly fine with borderline comatose passengers booking tickets and boarding.
2. I hopped on a bus to Kansas because, and this was quoted back to me when I called my brother for help getting back, "I want to find out if there's more corn in that shit hole than Iowa."
3. I once passed out in the middle of the road in the fetal position and was nearly run over by a woman delivering newspapers. The woman stopped and tried waking me up but I was unresponsive. When the cops arrived they were able to wake me up and when I was asked how much I had to drink, I simply responded, "you're looking at it". The police then charged me with disorderly conduct and took me home. I had no recollection of what fully happened until it was in the newspaper.
4. I was about to get my tonsils out a few years ago (am 29 now) and my brother, who is on his way to prison as we speak, insisted on getting me shitfaced at least once before the surgery. So he proceeds to take me to all his spots, introduce me to his friends, all the while slamming redbull vodkas.
At some point I black out, but vaguely remember a ratty strip club for a few seconds, and then waking up the next day. He told me that I got us kicked out of the shittiest strip club in the city by standing up and saying, "How much does it cost to f*ck someone in here because I know that's how this works!"
5. I woke up in a police cell.
When you wake up in a police cell with no recollection of what crime you have committed you start to panic very quickly. I stood up and at that moment realised not only was i in a police cell, i was also naked. I put my clothes on and stood around waiting for someone to come and talk to me.
A policewoman walks in smiling and eating a packet of crisps. She puts the crisps down and tells me to put my hands out so she can handcuff me. I do this while asking why i was here, to which she says 'you're about to find out'.
She walks me in to a room with another policeman in it, who tells me to sit down and drink some water. He then tells me why i was there, which goes a little like this...
I was walking home from a night out when i went into a small supermarket and proceeded to eat some olives (i don't even like olives) and some chocolate bread. I then picked up some chicken breasts and left with them, putting them in the bin outside the shop. As i was continuing my walk home, the policeman i was now talking to pulled up in front of me to arrest me, at which point i decided it would be a good idea to try and run away. I got about 10m before i ran in to a bush and fell over.
After he had finished he asked if i wanted to see the evidence, i said yes. He then got up a CCTV image of me in the supermarket with a packet of olives in one hand, a big smile and a thumbs up with my other hand.
I fucked up.
6. We were having a pool party. Last thing i remember was 10 am. Fast forward to 8 pm. I'm alone, inside the pool, partying. Just waving my arms in the air, no music playing, no one around. I stop, think about what i was doing, and realize everybody went to bed about an hour ago.
Later, i'm told that, at noon, we ran out of ice, so someone offered to go buy some at the supermarket. I offered to go with him. Keep in mind i was only wearing my underwear, because i was in the pool.
When we get there, he tells me to stay in the car because i'm on my underwear. So, he enters the supermarket, and, after 5 minutes, he sees me, holding a bag of ice, in the cashier line, waiting for my turn... in my underwear.
Everybody was looking at me, and i'm like "what a lovely day", not realizing what was happening. We buy the ice and leave.
7. They said I bought a hot tub online worth about $600. Checked my Amazon and found out they were right.
8. One time I woke up and bitched at my friends for all eating jello shots without me. Then they politely informed me that they didn't have any, and I ate all of them
9. I apparently once lifted a couch cushion like it was a toilet seat. Then proceeded to vomit into the toilet. Closed the lid and went to sleep on the "toilet".
10. Some girl was being very rude to my friend. Apparently, I stuck my foot out and tripped her. While she was on the ground I went right up to her face and yelled "THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU FUCK A STRANGER IN THE ASS!"
11. Once I woke up after having a drinking contest with a 40-something punk rocker named Jake. Check my social media. This was like 2000, so I checked my livejournal. There was a message...from me...to me."Hey, I know you won't remember in the morning, but you had some pretty mediocre sex with a girl named April last night. You weren't any good in bed. (insert friend name) walked in on you but she's probably not mad you were fucking in her bed. Don't drink anymore."
12. I drank a fifth of whiskey, drunkenly stole another fifth of whiskey, drank that fifth of whiskey, fell down a flight of stairs, collapsed on a university lawn, puked on my friend's bed, and died. In that order. Had to be revived by paramedics. I don't remember any of it, my friends had to tell me about it later. Would not do again.
13. High school graduation party. I was drinking liquor and had moved on to high proof moonshine when the police raided the party. I ran along with a hundred or so other party goers, leaping over fences in the process, to hide, except when the police finally left, after issuing the people who stayed, minor under the influence tickets, I didn't return with everyone else.
Apparently I had kept running. For miles. I have some tiny snippets of memories of hiding in shadows and ditches from police with flashlights, squad cars spot lights, and being yelled at to stop, but that's about it.
I was found by pure luck 3 hours later, something like 12 miles away, when I apparently recognized the sound of a friends aftermarket exhaust on a nearby road and burst out of the woods to flag him down.
I was covered in sticks, live branches, and dirt; and I had smeared mud on my shirt, face, arms, and in my hair as camouflage, and was completely and utterly incoherent. I had apparently attempted to make an impromptu ghillie suit while evading capture. I threw up in the back seat of my friends car, promptly fell asleep, and had to be carried like a human couch up a flight of stairs. While being carried I projectile vomited on the walls of the stairwell; until my friends got me upstairs where they immediately stripped me, put me in a cold bath tub, ordered me to bathe, helped me dry off, and then put me in bed. My mom was so happy that we actually had a DD for the party, that she didn't give me any shit about it. Though I never told her I turned into a blackout drunk version of Arnold at the end of Predator, to run from the police.
14. In Norway we have this tradition called russ, where the graduate students dress up in red, blue, black or white pants, drink for 17 days, and write exams.
I woke up drunk with a bottle of vodka under my teachers desk, on my exam day. I do not really remember it that well, but the teacher let me take the exam. Some friends told me that we where in some girls "russ van", drinking the whole night, and that they dropped me of outside the school 1 hour before the exam.
15. I woke in bed with a very large bowl of spaghetti bolognaise spilled under the covers with me.
16. Arrived home, took off my jeans in my kitchen but put my shoes back on. Then proceeded to head to bed, as I passed my dads room he was on his way to the bathroom and asked where my jeans were. I looked down and began to have a miniature panic attack because I thought I had left them in the taxi on my way home, along with my belongings.
This has happened a number of times...
17. At my friend's 18th about ten years ago, I had stupidly mixed heavy alcohol with the medication I was taking at the time.
I remember joking around with my friends one moment, then the next I was cowering in the corner, tears streaming down my face with several worried friends around me. I snapped out of it with something like, "Oh, hey guys!"
Apparently I had been sitting in the corner screaming out the name and phone number of the guy I had a crush on at the time.
18. I once woke up on my friends couch wearing the clothes she was wearing was the night before. A few minutes after I woke up her boyfriend walked into the lounge room wearing the clothes that I was wearing.
19. Pissed on my friends suitcase and when i wasconfronted mid-pee i justified it by claiming i was "just pissing on this vacuum, dont worry"
20. Bought tickets for a black eyed peas concert.
Some answers have been edited for clarity.
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