22 Bag Checkers And Security Guards Reveal The Weirdest Thing They've Ever Found In Someone's Bag.
Bag checkers of Reddit were asked: "What was the weirdest thing you've ever found in a bag?" These are some of the best answers.
1/22 While working at the airport, I checked a bag that contained an entire goat, including the head. In pieces. Bloody, hairy pieces taped up in plastic bags.
2/22 I work as a baggage handler for a couple airlines in Canada. By far the weirdest came from a guy moving from Victoria to Montreal. His bags included: a regular checked bag, a very large (1.5 meter) taxidermy tuna and a USED toilet.
Oddest mix-up was a guy who was pulled aside in security, taken to a private room by police and CATSA agents to be searched and interrogated about a bomb in his bag. Turns out he wrapped his cell charger around his phone and placed it on top of a Mars bar. Apparently it fits the physical criteria for an organic bomb.
3/22 Approximately $25,000 worth of Magic The Gathering cards.
4/22 I was working as an usher for an event that did not require tickets, let alone a bag check. Nonetheless, a woman insists that she show someone her bag "to be safe."
Inside: assorted regular purse items, a box of magnums, anywhere between $2500-$5000 cash, a razor, and a burrito. I had to confiscate the burrito.
5/22 Worked in a cinema and we had a problem with people filming movies one summer. We had to check people's bags to stop the piracy, one night this woman has a video camera in her bag, told her she couldn't take it in the screen. The manager came over and told her he would keep it in the locked office and she could get it after the film finished. End of the night and the woman hasn't collected the camera. So we decide to see what's on the camera.
Hardcore [amateur] porn of this women getting f*cked from all angles. She never picked it up and the battery died pretty quickly.
6/22 Customs official here. Full animal spine, not professionally butchered, fresh with bits of flesh attached. Being brought in for voodoo/african witchcraft type ceremony. It took four people to restrain the woman when we took it. She reacted like we were holding a knife to her child's throat or something.
Result: I have a curse on me, not the first actually.
7/22 Found a dildo with fresh sh*t stains.
8/22 Oatmeal. Not like dry oatmeal either, it was an entire suitcase filled with cooked oatmeal. They lined the inside with plastic so that it wouldn't leak.
9/22 Three thousand dollars in small, unmarked bills.
10/22 I have to search clients bags as part of my job. Last spring I was searching a girls bag and all of a sudden I started to hear a buzzing noise. I start searching and searching, dreading what I might find. Dig, dig, dig, buzz, buzz, buzz. What do I find? A mother f*cking tooth brush. Needless to say, I was disappointed.
11/22 A friend got me a job doing security at a theme park even though I am in no way qualified to be security. I wound up being stuck at the entrance either checking people who couldn't go through the metal detector/beeped when going through the metal detector with the wand or checking bags.
One guy had two pistols on his person and got mad when we told him weapons weren't allowed on the premises. He had a concealed carry permit and thought he should be able to carry there.
12/22 Used to be a baggage checker for concerts. One time a girl brought in a dildo, but it was on and recently used...
13/22 A large african american woman had a suitcase with a clown suit, a jar of pickles, some architecture for dummies book, and about a hundred $50 gift cards to Chik-fil-A.
14/22 One blue crushed velvet suit, one frilly laced cravat, one silver medallion with "male" symbol, one vinyl record album "Burt Bacharach Plays His Hits", one Swedish made penis enlarger pump ( he said it wasn't his), one credit card receipt for said penis enlarger, signed by him (he still insisted it wasn't his).
15/22 Military TSA (2T2) and was in the desert checking bags for a return trip of polish troops going home from Afghanistan. Commercial contract, so regular TSA guidelines apply. I see a grenade and lock down the whole building. Turns out to be a Damn lighter. Idiot tried to bring a lighter shaped like a grenade through an xray machine.
16/22 A machete. Like, a 5-foot long one. Confiscated (or rather voluntarily handed over after I asked really nicely) from a car with diplomatic plates - it was sitting next to the driver on the passenger seat. No explanation.
17/22 Oh god. You know, I worked at a venue that seats around 15,000 just outside Toronto and what I never saw coming was how much worse the bands/caterers/people-coming-in-through-the-back-entrance were compared to the guests.
A chainsaw hidden in a suspiciously-large guitar case. They said it was part of the act to get the crowd 'pumped'. "NOPE." "Pleaaaase?" "Nope." "Come onnn it would be epic, bro!" "I don't doubt it, but nope. Call our event co-ordinator and she might let you use it if you take the chain off but until then it's staying here"
19/22 When I worked for an airline, I had a man bring in a garbage bag full of deer heads to check in. Another time, while working in the baggage office, I opened a bag to look for identification of some sort, and found a large swarm of flies. The bag was full of mangoes. Mangoes and maggots.
20/22 I worked as airport security for 5 years and I think the weirdest things I've seen are dildos. So not really that exciting. I guess the weirdest thing about that is what person has them in their bags most of the time. It seemed to be old men for the most part... weird.
Oh, wait. Well, there was one guy who was going to Mexico and was stopped with a baton and a kilo of rohypnol( rape drug). I didn't find the drugs. I found the baton and the cops found the drugs.
21/22 I work security for a local arena, and one night before a concert, I checked the little purse of lady who looked to be about 45 years old while her husband stood with his arm around her waist. She opened her purse revealing 2 condoms and about 5 panty liners. The husband saw that, and immediately took a step to the side.
I've never tried so hard to stifled a laugh in my life.
22/22 I once found a set of human eye balls in a nice wooden box. The eyes were covered in wax in an attempt to preserve them. Apparently she worked for a research doctor. The research doctor had sent her to Asia to collect them as it was cheaper and easier to that then to fill out the correct import permits.
There comes a time in our lives when we have to cut people out because of their toxic, negative, or destructive behavior. And there's no shame in doing it - tolerance and acceptance can only go so far, and there is always a last straw.
The785 asked: What was the incident that made you cut somebody close out of your life?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.