29 Adults Share The Dumbest Thing They Did As A Child To Try And Look Cool.
Do you ever look back at your adolescent years and cringe at the things you did to try and impress your peers? Here, 29 adults share the dumbest thing they did as a child to try and look cool.
1/29. I was really fond of Harry Potter when I was in early middle school. So every morning in the bathroom, even before meeting any of my friend and all, I drew a lightning-shaped wound with a pencil to leave a red mark. I thought I looked cool when people ask me what is it, and I answer I wouldn't like to talk about it.
2/29. I was at the age when the doctor starts asking sexual questions. I was having a standard checkup and the "Are you sexually active?" question came up.
So I responded, Kinda.
Is that a yes or a no?
To which I sadly replied, No.
3/29. At camp, the "cool kids" decided to ditch the motivational speaker and go night swimming.
I follow, deciding I too will be cool. 5 minutes later we hear yelling and a camp counsellor coming our way. We all run to the dorms and I hide under a bed. The camp counsellor finds us and advises us to go shower as the pond was actually a waste treatment lagoon.
While showering one of the "cool kids" looks at me and turns to his friends saying, "Who is that guy?"
His friend responds," I dunno I think he tagged along to be cool."
Guilty as charged.
4/29. I used to carry a skateboard around. I had no idea how to ride it without falling on my butt, so I never rode it. I just carried it everywhere.
5/29. In 3rd grade, I was envious of my friend who had glasses. I thought he was cool, so I thought having glasses would make me cool... later that day, I convinced my mom I couldn't see the blackboard at school.
She took me to the eye doctor, whom I also convinced I had a hard time seeing (it was surprisingly easy back then). He fitted me with a prescription that made me wince with pain when I wore them. Eventually I got used to it, and now my eyesight gets progressively worse with every new pair of glasses I get.
The worst thing is that the kid I idolized wasn't even cool. He was an exact replica of Milhouse, and eventually left school because he was bullied too often. Guess who took his place?
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6/29. In the third grade at a Christmas play I thought it would look cool if I was being bothered by a fly. I have no idea how I came to this conclusion. In the middle of a song I pretended to look confused and started swatting at an imaginary bug I pretended was flying around my head. A few people in the audience kept looking at me but no one said anything to me about it.
Much later I found out the play was recorded and sent out to everyone's parents. The camera man actually zoomed in on me the whole time I was thrashing at this fake bug. When my class saw it, my teacher pointed out that there aren't usually any flies around in the middle of December.
7/29. No matter how heavy my back-pack was I would only wear it on one shoulder. With the strap super long. Because it was insanely uncool to wear it in any way that wouldn't cause me pain. Now that I'm old, I wear it on both shoulders, straps pulled snug, waist and chest straps engaged. And maybe even with a camel-back. Fourteen-year-old me would be so ashamed.
8/29. I moulded a paper clip to look like a retainer and wore it to school. All the cool kids had dental work in fourth grade.
9/29. In 3rd grade me and my friend wanted to be cool but had no concept of what being cool really was.. So we came up with the idea of "walking cool so everyone would think we were awesome."
10/29. One day when I was in late middle school, I was walking down the hall and some girls behind me called out, saying "Hey, did you know that Katie likes you?" (Katie was a very attractive girl). For some reason, I instantly said out loud, "Well you can tell her I don't feel like I am mature enough really to be liking girls. I don't want to be with any girls until I am older." I then walked away with a smug as ever look on my face, as if I'd said something brilliant
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11/29. Start smoking.
Some of it was out of curiosity, but basically I just wanted to be a rebel and "cool". Eight years later and I've finally quit and have no desire to start again; but that was hands down the worst decision I made as a youth.
12/29. The first day of the 5th grade I thought I needed to look cool because I was finally an upperclassman of elementary school. So, my solution was to walk down the hallways pretending to count on my fingers all day. I thought showing off my counting skills would surely make me the coolest kid. Yea.
13/29. Fell going up the stairs at school and tried to play it off like I was relaxing or taking a break. In the middle of a flight of stairs.
14/29. In 3rd grade, told my entire class that my mom was a poor single mom who couldn't afford to pay for our dog's vet bills. One of my friends came from a struggling family, and I thought she was the coolest and wanted to be like her. My dad was completely present in my life and both parents made lots of money. My teacher called my mom and asked about it and I got caught in a stupid awkward lie.
15/29. When I was about six or seven years old, we had a school assembly on name-calling. The teacher giving it introduced the by asking which students had nicknames, and what they were, etc. before moving on to talk about the different between nicknames and bullying.
I always wanted some cool nickname. I remember one of the kids going to the front of the hall saying his name was Red Ranger because his name was Jason (like the red Power Ranger) and I was incredibly jealous.
In my idiot-small-child brain, I thought If I make up a nickname now and tell the teacher in front of everyone what it is, everyone will start calling me by that name, and I'll have an awesome nickname!.
I guess I didn't have much time to think, and that combined with being a small child/moron meant that the best I could come up with was Mega Sting. So I went up and said in front of the teachers in the room and the whole school that my nickname was Mega Sting.
I told my family when I went home that I had a nickname and that is was Mega Sting and as any good family would do, they've never let me live it down since. I'm twenty-four now.
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16/29. I was always, when I was younger, obsessed with superheroes I came up with myself. Whenever I went to preschool, and oftentimes kindergarten, I would show up wearing a cape, a bright yellow knit balaclava (it itched like hell) and a cow-skin print vest and sometimes chaps. I don't even know what sort of superhero dude I had come up with, but I was always convinced it helped with the ladies.
17/29. I would always like trip or stumble in front of girls I liked so they could pay attention to me. You know, maybe come to me and be all like, "[My name], you fell! I must nurse you back to health.... with my love."
Instead what happened was I'd fall, barely anyone would notice and those that did just snickered and left me there. I doubt I'm the only person that tried this though.
18/29. In third grade, I liked a guy named Ben who had spiky hair. Told all of my friends that he had given me one of his "spikes" from his hair as a symbol of our love. Kept some pieces of my cat's fur in a plastic bag labeled "Ben's Spikes" in my locker. And yes, other girls WERE jealous. But eventually I think he found out and it was super embarrassing for me.
19/29. More than a dozen Livestrong bracelets and associated knockoffs up and down my arm. At least some of the money went to charity
20/29. When I was in 2nd grade, I tried to impress this one girl I really liked by giving her the swing I was on. Of course, that wasn't good enough, I had to jump off the swing too. So I jumped off and landed on two feet, but my momentum carried me forward and I went straight into a nearby tree, breaking my right arm. Later, when I got a cast, I thought I could still impress this girl by being a bad boy and getting a pink cast. I was made fun of by all my guy friends for months.
It paid off though. She's now my wife.
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21/29. In the 2nd grade, I thought it would be cool to record a song on a cassette tape and basically make a shout out to everyone in my class. It went something like "Hey Alex! How ya doing Sam?! I like your shoes Colleen! etc.." I made the teacher play it in class. Less than halfway in I realized I had made a huge mistake...longest 4 minutes of my childhood.
22/29. Got my hair iced blonde because many of the popular boys were doing it, and tried to gel my hair like they did.
Having no experience "gelling," I showed up to school with awkwardly over-gelled hair and a giant glob of gel somewhere in the middle of my hair. Which was subsequently pointed out in the eloquence expected of 7th grade boys.
I tried to throw a party later that year in my grandparents' basement since basement parties were the cool thing in 7th grade. I made invitations and flyers, handed them out to everybody, but forgot to ask my grandparents if this would be ok ahead of time.
They, of course, said no. Which led to immense ridicule about being too uncool to throw a party.
But, I did eventually become accepted by the popular kids. During the final junior high football game, coach benched us 8th graders for playing like a bunch of idiots. I made a comment to one of the popular kids that "Coach Hoins should play a whole-hearted game of Hide-And-Go-Screw-Himself."
The kid wouldn't stop laughing. He kept laughing long enough that coach got mad and made him stand on the sidelines with him for the rest of the game. And he was still laughing.
That day...I finally made a friend.
23/29. When I was younger, all the "cool kids" in every single one of the cartoons I watched would always have slicked-back hair and sunglasses.
So, one day during recess in Kindergarten, I pushed my hair back, closed my eyes and started walking around the playground because I thought that sunglasses would have that same "blinding effect."
I walked around the playground with some swagger in my walk, expecting all the Kindergarten girls to be like, "Wow, that guy is soooo dreamy", but that didn't happen of course, and I ended up blindly walking into the jungle gym and getting a bruise the size of a goose egg on my forehead. I was a stupid kid.
24/29. When I was in 6th grade I randomly scribbled what I thought looked like adult signatures all over my notebook. I then told my teacher that my mom knew the Lakers basketball team and these were all their signatures. Thinking back I realize that the scribbles looked nothing like signatures, but it was nice of her to play along
25/29. I insisted on wearing a full suit to the state fair and carried around a little folding fan. I also wore lots of black turtlenecks and bought books based on their length so everyone would see me carrying around a giant book. I was a weird kid.
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26/29. In fourth grade I thought that if I intentionally answered an easy question wrong, I would get some laughs from my fellow classmates. So one day we're learning geography and my teacher asks, "Now [my name], is Pennsylvania on the east or west of the USA?" I thought to myself, "My time to shine!" and I stupidly answered "The west?"
Dead silence. Nobody had laughed, or even chuckled. "No, [my name], it's in the east, but good try!"
Oh, heck no. "Good try" wasn't enough for this stupid little fourth grader. I needed laughs and I needed them now. So I did the only thing that I thought could get me a reaction at that moment.
"NOOOOOOOOOOO" and then I slammed my head as hard as I could on my book. I guess I just wasn't at all funny to anyone back then, because there was still just silence. Needless to say, I just kept my mouth shut for the rest of the day.
27/29. I was in first or second grade, and had a somewhat inflated view of my own intelligence. Naturally, I wanted to make sure that all the other kids knew how smart I was.
Most days, for one reason or another, the teacher would have to send the class somewhere one student at a time. Whenever she did this, she would pick them in a random order. While this was happening, I would mutter numbers to myself, and every time someone was picked I would nod my head wisely, as if by muttering numbers I was predicting who would be next in line.
I can't remember how long I did this for.
28/29. Third grade, I felt it appropriate to go to school dressed as Sonny from "Miami Vice". White blazer, sleeves rolled up. Pink pastel shirt, white pants. Complete with pennies in the loafers, forced to remove my sunglasses. To this day I do not know why my mom let me go to school like that. I thought I was hot. Looking back, I know why i was made fun of.
29/29. I cut my eyelashes off when I was ten because the boy I liked was dating a girl with almost non-existent eyelashes and mine were really full and long and I thought he might like me more if I looked like this girl. It worked because one week later he was my "boyfriend" for the next two years.
"It wasn't me!"
There's not much you can do when the righteous fist of the law comes down on you. Call it a mix-up, or call it a mistake, if someone's pegged you at the scene of a crime there's not much you can do but trust the justice system to prove you innocent. However, that's a gamble, and just because you've been given a "not guilty" doesn't mean the effects won't follow you for the rest of your life.
Reddit user, u/danbrownskin, wanted to hear about the times when it wasn't you, seriously, it was someone else, when they asked: