29 Incredibly Normal People Share Their Best ‘My Life Is Average’ Moments.
For years people have been contributing their boring, mundane, and occasionally random happenings to the website My Life Is Average. These are some of the best submissions.
1/29 Today my doctor told me I need to take Steroids for a week. I asked him if it would shrink my testicles. He politely reminded me that I am a girl. MLIA.
2/29 Today, I wore Axe body spray. I wasn't tackled by any women. MLIA.
3/29 Today, I decided to tan on the balcony. I took my top off and my neighbor came out and saw me. Hes a guy. So am I. We greeted each other. MLIA.
4/29 Today, I filled a Windex bottle with blue Gatorade. I then sprayed it into my mouth in front of my mother. She began to panic and scream and get hysterical. I thought it was funny. She didn't. MLIA.
5/29 Today, my boss passed me in the hall at work and asked me "Do you have a sec?". I was trying to be flippant and replied "I have tons of secs". We both pretended I didn't say that. MLIA.
6/29 Today, I met a girl named Unique. She has an identical twin sister. No one else thought it was funny. MLIA.
7/29 Today, my two sisters were having a fight over the dinner table, one is 14 the other is 6. My 14 year old sister yelled "Well Santas not real!". My 6 year old sister plucked up some courage and yelled "Well neither is Edward Cullen!". One ran from the table crying. I think we all know who did. MLIA.
The mediocrity continues on the NEXT PAGE!
8/29 Today, the whole world came crashing down on me, so I got some tape and stuck the map back onto the wall. MLIA.
9/29 Today in Latin my teacher was trying to figure out how many days were in July, I said 31, he asked if I knew it from a rhyme or something, I said yes. The real reason I know is because Harry Potter's birthday is July 31st. MLIA.
10/29 Today is the day after Labor Day, I was feeling rebellious and so I wore white. 5 minutes later, I spilled coffee all over myself. You win this round universe. MLIA.
11/29 Today, I saw a commercial for the Snuggie. I thought it was stupid idea but I couldn't change the channel because I was under a blanket and I didn't want my arms to get cold. MLIA.
12/29 Today, I died from not passing on a chain mail. This is the 117th time this has happened. MLIA.
13/29 Today, I had to choose between a strawberry flavored Dum Dum and a mystery flavored Dum Dum. I decided to be adventurous and choose the mystery flavor; it was strawberry flavored. MLIA.
14/29 Today I came up with a great comeback, for an argument I had a week ago. MLIA.
15/29 Today, I fell and landed on a really cute guy while on the subway. This did not lead me to find my soul mate, or end with us giving high fives. It was just awkward. MLIA.
More totally normal people on the NEXT PAGE!
16/29 Today, as I was waiting on line at a store, I noticed the cashier had a British accent. When it was my turn, I faked a British accent in conversation. He asked me where I was from, so I admitted that I was faking. His British accent disappeared as he said, Me too. MLIA.
17/29 Today, my mom told me to clean my room because the cleaning lady is coming tomorrow. I'm still confused. MLIA.
18/29 Today, I posted a creative status on Facebook and proceeded to sign on and off of Facebook to see if anyone commented on it. No one did. MLIA.
19/29 Today I was talking with my best friend and she was complaining that she was forever getting calls from telemarketers. I told her that I never got telemarketing calls, then realized that when I gave out fake phone numbers to companies, I always instinctively gave them her number. I did not tell her of my realization. MLIA.
20/29 Today, I was playing around on my laptop and accidentally deleted the Recycling Bin. I spent the next fifteen minutes staring at the screen wondering where it would have gone. This thought still puzzles me. MLIA.
21/29 Today, while in my room, I heard my dad say "son of a bitch" to himself. I walked out and said "You called?" I don't think I've ever seen a more priceless look on someone's face. MLIA.
22/29 Today, I was at the mall wearing an "I'm With Stupid" shirt. A guy comes and hugs me and says "I've finally found you!" His shirt said "I'm Stupid". We're going out tonight. MLIA.
The normalcy gets out of hand on the NEXT PAGE!
23/29 Today, I renamed my iPod "This ship" just for the pleasure of seeing the phrase "This ship is syncing" MLIA.
24/29 Today, I was at the doctor's office. Because I'm a teenager, I was required to take a survey about drugs, alcohol, and sex. It asked if I was in a gang. I wrote 'marching band'. MLIA.
25/29 Today I ate a tootsie pop. It took 473 licks to get to the tootsie roll center. You're welcome world. MLIA.
26/29 Today, I was getting my hair cut. I can never make good conversations with hairdressers for who knows what reason. As I sat debating something to talk about I opened my mouth and said "So, where do you work?" MLIA.
27/29 Today, my little brother threatened me by saying that he would tell people I wear underwear. I am really confused as to how that's an actual threat. MLIA.
28/29 Today, I realized that the word OK is a sideways person. I totally forgot about what I was doing and proceeded to make a whole family of OK people on a word document by using different colors and font sizes. MLIA.
29/29 Today I found my iPod, put my earbuds in, and sat down to do my homework. Two hours later, I finished and took my earbuds out. I then realized I had never turned my iPod on. MLIA.
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You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar, or so the saying goes.
The same can be said for your interactions with cops, most of whom are perfectly happy to let minor infractions slide––When was the last time you were actually ticketed for jaywalking?––provided you're not a total Karen should you interact them.
Your local police officer likely doesn't care about jaywalking or the fact that you went five miles over the speed limit unless you give him a reason to, as we learned when Redditor Takdel asked police officers: "What stupid law have you enforced just because someone was an a-hole?"