Relationships are hard. Finances are hard. Making things work with someone from a completely different lifestyle than your own is hard. Being in a relationship with someone who has a lot more money than you can be like a perfect storm of "oh no." When that perfect storm slams into the fragile isles of masculinity and societial expectations ... well ...
Ignorance really is biased.
We always think we know what is right and what is wrong, what's the truth and what's a lie. The reality is that most of what we know is just an opinion or a partial truth that we've filled in with our own rational (or irrational) explanation. These opinions that we pass off as 'facts' are far from it and it takes a lot of courage to look at yourself and admit you were wrong or misinformed about something. Everyone likes to pretend they're on a different level, but the truth is you're not so different from the people you disagree with. Meditate on that.
Here are a some people admitting strong opinions they no longer have, and what it took to change those views. Redditor u/segafarm asks:
I used to think that being cynical/negative was realistic and somehow smarter than being positive. I've since realized that a "be prepared for the worst but expect the best" is far better. We can't control the outcome of anything in life. Being negative makes you miserable rather than protected from bad things happening.
Cant' Have A Conversation With A Parrot
I used to be a conspiracy theorist. Believed that 9/11 was committed by the US government and that we never landed on the moon.
Once I started looking outside of the echo chamber I was in and started looking at alternate explanations, theories and listening to different viewpoints I soon realized how ridiculous those notions were.
A Big, Mysterious Universe
I used to be a strict, hardline atheist. I was the kind of bastard that would bring the subject up for no reason, just to argue. I don't know what the hell my problem was. Now I feel like, the universe is big, I don't know what all might be out there, I don't really care. I live as if there is no afterlife, because that makes sense to me. But if you don't, and you believe in one, that's perfectly fine, and maybe you're right. Who knows?
Portrait Of An Artist As A Young Man
I used to believe anyone can be a successful artist if they just put the time and effort into it. There is no such thing as talent, only hard work.
What changed my mind: Art school. There were quite a few people that tried hard, but just weren't able to achieve professional level art.
You're Not Your Emotions
For the longest time, I thought my emotions were in a sense the most "real" part of me. I was always a very emotional person and I didn't make a real effort to control it as I thought it was a good thing, that I was just being honest with myself. Over time though, I started to become very depressed and the negative emotions just keep adding on and on. I thought "this is just how I am I guess". Unfortunately it started hurting other relationships I had, and everything changed when my girlfriend broke up with me. After a lot of reading I found that emotions are not who we are at all. They're just reactions and there's nothing that requires us to act on them or feed them. I'm learning to let it go through me instead of hanging on like I used to.
Don't Forget Big Willie Style
I used to think that hip hop was bland, repetitive, and all about clubbing and sh*t. Then one of my friends pointed me towards people like Kendrick Lamar, Eminem, Nas and Run The Jewels, who all have great songs and clever lyrics, and I realized that Hip Hop is pretty great.
The A**holes Will Always Find A Way
I used to think that the catholic church was responsible for all of the hateful people in it. I gave people the chance to challenge my opinion and someone explained it very nicely to me. Basically, the hateful people use the church as an excuse, if you remove the church they will gladly find another excuse.
I used to tell myself that I would never stop smoking weed, and that I'd be happy if my kids grew up to be pot smokers... Now I have a kid, don't smoke, and realize what an idiot I was when all I did was smoke all day. I could probably be in a much better position if I hadn't smoked all through college.
But I mean, I still think pot's okay... Just in moderation.
The Road Less Traveled
"All taxation is theft, man! I made my money without any help from public institutions or the infrastructure they support, I should be able to keep every last dime of it!"
Naturally that was when I was 18, living at home rent free, and working at Pizza Hut as a delivery driver who relied upon public roads for pretty much every cent I made.
All Those PSA's Didn't Do Much
The whole D.A.R.E anti-drugs. Yes crack and heroin is bad, but they over dramatized what happens when you do smaller drugs. Weed isn't even a gateway drug, alcohol is more of a gateway drug. When I saw weed for the first time I thought it was tobacco (This was after all the D.A.R.E training too). Letting the government teach you your morales and philosophy is a thing that sheep do. Don't be a sheep.
Where Would We Be Without The Kindness Of Strangers
I used to think people on welfare and state assistance just weren't trying hard enough. I grew up spoiled and entitled and it seemed like any kind of charity was a stigma.
Then, my husband became chronically ill, and the economy took a shit. My family has been close to homelessness more than once, and have relied on state insurance and assistance off and on throughout the past few years. There are definitely people out there who abuse the system, but some just get stuck in a horrible cycle of poverty.
I also work in a school that has a high number low income and refugee families. It has really opened my eyes to the struggles that some people face.
He's Still There For You, The Best He Can Be
I could go through life and could seek meaningful advice from my Dad who has always been there for me.
Now he has been reduced to a feeble condition, I am starting to understand I'm out there on my own, and even what he's sure of is suspect given his mental and physical facilities have been rapidly deteriorating in his late seventies. I feel horrible that I have noticed this long before he did - or at least admitted as much.
Clear Your Mind
This was before I received an ADHD diagnosis. When my doctor referred me to an ADHD specialist, first of all I refused to believe him and was kind of slighted that he even suggested that I could possibly have ADHD.
I had a very strong opinion that if I get a diagnosis that I would refuse to take prescribed amphetamines because they are "bad" and "addictive" and that they would ruin my life.
Then I actually tried the prescription and it was like magic.
Going Through The Whole Spectrum
Used to be fairly open with my views on immigration policy. Then I worked for a while down near Corpus Christie doing immigration work. I'd say one out if every hundred people that came through our office was going to somebody who actually wanted to work and try to make a living here. So many people simply wanted to exist enough to get welfare. Many were young men who we would later defend against exportation as a result of their criminal activity. I began to despise the work of defending these men and wished they would be deported.
Now, I'm dating a foreign girl and we are in the legal immigration process. She has advanced degrees and skills, so that makes things a little easier. But it does make me resent people who just bypass the system. We can't bypass the system because I imagine my participation in immigration fraud could get me disbarred.
Nostaglia is welcome in these strange times... and lots of people have some ideas about what products they'd like to see brought back to life. Orbitz? Yeah. Wendy's spicy nuggets? Oh yes. Discovery Zone? Let's open one!
Vaffanculo28 asked: If you could bring back any discontinued product, toy or item, what would it be and why?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
Tinder dating is a wild ride, so it seems, though I've never used it. But the level of sheer crazy never ceases to amaze. No wonder there are so many single people out there. Stay in school.
jamesh31 asked: What's your worst Tinder experience?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
Yeah, breaking the law right in front of a law enforcement officer -probably- is not going to work out in your favor. But hey, give it a try if you want.
Often if they witness you doing something dumb, cops are obligated to arrest you. As much as they would like to sit there and facepalm, you've now forced their hand.
Save some money for those therapy bills!
Children don't come with instructions. As a parent you are inevitably going to screw your kids up in some way. You can't avoid it, you can only hope the damage is minimal and that the they find talented therapists to later. Though you can't always be perfect you can be vigilant with your actions and behaviors, remember, the children are always watching.
Redditor u/Tubu_ wanted parents out there to fess up to their and other's parenting issues gone awry by asking.... What is some bad parenting that messes the kid up?