Alarmed Parents Share The Weirdest Thing They Found On Their Kids' Social Media
What's posted on social media sites...stays on social media sites, where for the most part your parents can't see it (or are blocked). 'Cause God forbid they stumble across your account and found out what really goes on Friday nights on the town.
For more stories, you can find the original source thread at the end of the article.
"I was trying to figure out my niece's age, but it was too late to call my mom and ask. I remembered she had an Instagram account, and I thought that might help me figure out how old she was. I looked her up. She has the standard tween Instagram bio about what activities she likes and a list of like 15 of her BFF's, immediately followed by pondering (and I quote) "Mostly why do people hate me."
She's 12. She is definitely 12."
"This was probably in the early 2000's. Me and my buddy were off school for the summer and he would hang out my house. Occasionally wed look at adult videos on the family computer.
Then one day my dad comes home from work, comes downstairs and says, 'Hey! You guys missed the bus!' Im like 'uuuhhh... its summer. Theres no school.' My dad responds 'the bang bus.'
Mother of God...we forgot to close the freaking browser."
"I found out my son is an urban explorer. He's 14 and I saw some video of him and his friends sneaking into an old air force base and climbing to the top of an air hangar."
"My younger brother thought that when you entered more searches, it would delete the ones before at some point. So I look on his iPad one day and see a search for lady lumps or intercourse, one of the two. The search after that was cheese. And then cheese cheese. And then cheese cheese cheese. And so on. So many cheeses."
"My 9-year-old son's Google history:
'Do girls in England poo blood for a month?'"
"I have a 6-year-old boy and a 5-year-old girl who are pretty obsessed with Youtube gamers. They narrate their play like they are performing for subscribers and my son actually figured out how to post videos to Youtube. But I did not find this out until they had posted a few already.
They had ridiculous titles where one of them had obviously just been using the next suggested word so it came out like, 'The ghost of the wealthy, but if they didn't then deserve.' and it would be a video of my foot while I was asleep on the couch and you'd hear one of them say, 'Foot.' and then giggle madly and then the video cuts out."
"Can I do the inverse? My dad recently opened an Instagram account, and within 10 minutes of having it, managed to accidentally upload a screenshot of our wifi password to it.
Like, I have no idea how he managed that. Even put a filter on it...for some reason."
"I checked my 11-year-old son's search history to find a number of interesting questions...
Do men grow lady bits?
Will my junk disappear when I'm 18?
Will I become a girl?
How do I save my private part?
I asked him about his search history a couple days later and he told me that some kids in his school told him that when boys turn 18 they turn into girls and lose their junk. Those jerks..."
"I went through my 13-year-old cousin's iPad.
He had searched 'cream pie', 'girls doing a cream pie' and 'cream pie videos.'
After, searches for 'apple pie', 'pizza pie', 'peach pie' and 'raspberry pie' came up, presumably to disguise his actual aims."
"I'm not a parent, but the other day my twelve year old little brother posted a topless photo on Instagram with the caption 'F-Boy'."
"My son has Autism, he is high functioning but still Autistic. He has been mainstream most of his schooling and in the 5th grade one of the boys told the others how to search lady bits on the computer. Well my son in all of his autistic glory was searching 'pagina' instead of the other thing and was only getting pictures of leaves. Poor kid."
"I'm not a parent, but one time my cousin got onto the computer when he was 11 or 12 or so and searched for 'naked girls.' I was there when his stepdad checked through the browser history, and needless to say he and my cousin had a chat about acceptable search terms."
"My kids are too young for twitter or snapchat, but they love to watch Youtube. I started getting notifications a few months ago from people replying to 'my' comments on conspiracy videos. I found out my son has a curiosity about flat earthers and doomsday preppers."
"I hopped on my nephew's tablet and proceeded to pull up the internet browser. Immediately I was staring at a screenshot of an overweight homeless looking Santa knocking the life out of a much younger Mrs. Clause.
I immediately asked my nephew what kind of research he was doing with his Santa video and his face turned fire engine red and he scurried back to his room."
"My 15-year old step bro-in-law used my wifes laptop while he was visiting the house and forgot to clear the history. His google searches included: bosom and girl pussing.
Hmmm, now that I type this out I am wondering if he was just misspelling pissing. That would make a little sense... albeit not comforting."
"When my twins were young and in elementary school, they were looking up the Simpsons and accidentally came across cartoon Simpson's adult films. The computer was in the living room so I heard them giggling and turned to see two guilty little faces. It was so hard not to laugh and so disturbing! What a conversation... the sight of Milhouse and Lisa is forever burned into my retinas."
"I'm not a parent, but when I was a kid I found an adult flash game website. I would go on it whenever I had the chance. Eventually my mom found out and she told my dad to talk to me about it. My dad and I got into the car and he started this serious talk about how 'the internet is a very powerful tool...' I felt really guilty.
Then he told me how to erase the browsing history."
"When I was like 12 my dad found Dragon Ball Z Hentai in my history searches and proceeded to look through all of the pages while I hid in the bathroom pretending to use it.
I remember him yelling my name and having to mentally prepare to deny everything. Im scared as heck to have kids and find their adult film searches."
"My step son is 7 and I found a bunch of searches for:
Dominicans with no hands and feet. Dominicans with no heads. Dominican chests. Dominican torsos. Dominican legs. Dominicans in stores. Dominicans for sale. Silver Dominicans. Black Dominicans. White Dominicans.
I was at a loss of how to bring it up to him. Thankfully, the next day we were in a clothing store and he asked me why Dominicans don't have hands or heads, then why there are so many different colored Dominicans. I remembered the internet searches and became a little upset. I told him to be quiet because what he was saying could be taken offensively by Dominican people. He then got frustrated and loudly said, 'Dominicans aren't people' as he pointed to a statue next to us.
I breathed a sigh of relief and said 'Mannequins.'"
"When he was little, my brother once wanted to help us find a cool new purse to order for my mom's birthday. He image searched 'fun bags', and my parents had to answer a LOT of questions."
"I'm not a parent but one time my mom made me really mad and my dad had to talk to me about how I searched, 'how to kill my mom' and why it's wrong to think killing someone will get me Play Station 2 games."
"A guy on Instagram sent my 12-year-old step-daughter and her friend's pictures of his junk. Not just once, but many times. The police are involved and he has been located in NYC but we have yet to hear anything back yet. Disgusting.
The man is at least 30."
"A dad here. My daughter is in elementary school and she's all about YouTube. (I'm assuming most kids are these days). She normally watches Minecraft or Little Pet Shop videos. I decided to search her history out of curiosity to my horror she was searching GUYS KISSING BEHINDS."
"I found my stepdaughters 'musical.ly' account. She had a bunch of poor attempts at sexy belly dancing to various Evanescence songs."
Points are edited for clarity.
"It wasn't me!"
There's not much you can do when the righteous fist of the law comes down on you. Call it a mix-up, or call it a mistake, if someone's pegged you at the scene of a crime there's not much you can do but trust the justice system to prove you innocent. However, that's a gamble, and just because you've been given a "not guilty" doesn't mean the effects won't follow you for the rest of your life.
Reddit user, u/danbrownskin, wanted to hear about the times when it wasn't you, seriously, it was someone else, when they asked: