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Clever People Share The Loophole Discoveries That Helped Them Game The System

Clever People Share The Loophole Discoveries That Helped Them Game The System

It feels good to play the system. Like, when you turn on all the cheats for a game of "Goldeneye" on the N64?

To go around the rules and avoid waiting in line is the basis for those "life hacks" you might have seen shared online. While it's cute that some people know how to keep your shoes from smelling using packets of ginger or how to save time by brushing your teeth in the shower, these stories are on a completely new level. People responded to Reddit user r/akivlam, who asked for the greatest cons and loophole exposers to share their tales:

What's the loophole that you discovered and subsequently exploited?

Playing Companies Against Each Other

I used to sell guitars at a music store. This guy started coming in and window shopping, getting prices. Didn't seem serious so no-one wanted to waste time on him, but I was nice and maybe naive so I spent hours testing pedals, amps, etc. Writing out prices. He'd come in every couple weeks, telling me he has some money coming in soon. Everyone thought I was wasting my time, and after a while I started to believe them.

Then one day he calls and says he's ready to buy, make sure I have everything he wants in stock for next week (it was around $1500 worth of gear if I remember correctly) when he comes in. I get his order ready.

Dude shows up with a huge stack of gift cards. Apparently the owner had been running a promo in the paper - go to this random record store, pay them $50 and get a $100 gift card to my guitar store. Could only get it once a week. This kid had been going to this place every week for like four months, buying gift cards and saving them up. Brought em in with this look on his face, like we are all idiots and he is the smartest MF around. And he was, there was no fine print, no limitations in any of the postings anywhere. Guy just got a monster discount for being patient. Im sure they lost money on that deal.

They don't offer that promotion anymore, either.

CanadianBlacon

If They Don't Notice, Why Speak Up?

I got a birthday coupon for a free entree from one of my favorite chain restaurants last summer.

I showed the person at the cash register but they didn't check it. So I ate my free meal. The next day, I brought it to a different location and the person didn't check it either.

This went on for five days straight.

healthyapples55

Stealing From The Bouncy Ball Machine

One time I found out a bouncy ball dispenser at Walmart could be exploited. I could put a quarter in, turn it part way and get a ball, then turn the handle back and get my quarter back. I did that to get a few balls before I felt guilty and asked my dad if it's stealing. I was really young so I didn't fully understand.

MrFantastic18

Getting A Free Ride. Literally.

I once signed up for a autoshop credit card.

I got my oil changed on our cars and new tires. I kept waiting for them to send a bill, and they never did.

I also told the cashier multiple times about not getting bills.

I also kept charging car stuff... Never paid once.

Nothing on my credit report, nada.

It's been ten years.

DKahnt

But, Which Tire? You Didn't Specify.

Decades ago, I purchased a set of tires from an autobody shop and was offered a road hazard warranty for $10 per tire. I accepted and they rang up $40. I said that no, it's $10 because I only wanted it on one tire. They argued there'd be no way to tell which tire had the warranty and I pointed out that it would be obvious because it would be the one that's flat. Eventually they called corporate/legal and I got my $10 warranty and as I was leaving they were taking down the signs advertising $10 per tire road hazard and ripping up the brochures. Three hours of stubborn well spent.

_NightmareGerbil

It IS A Clear Bottle, After All

When I was younger Mountain Dew had a promotion where 1 in 4 bottles won a free Mountain Dew. This was before codes and silly points, you just traded the cap for a new soda.

I realized I could look through the plastic bottle at the right angle to identify winners. I only bought 1 soda that whole summer! It was glorious.

sorryqt

Two Words: Free Burritos

A few years ago, The Cubs had a promotion with Qdoba where if the Cubs scored a run in the 6th inning or whatever inning it was, you'd get a free burrito. When you walked into the stadium, the workers would hand you this little booklet that had the Qdoba coupon along with others. So many people would just discard them on the ground by their seats. After the games, I would go around and collect as many as I could find. I'd take them into Qdoba and get me free burrito regardless if the Cubs scores in the correct inning. The employees never checked or knew. So many free burritos that summer.

RyFromTheChi

Repeat: FREE BURRITOS

Yes! When Chipotle had all their virus crap 2-3 years ago, they sent out all these free meal coupons. I lived in an apartment at the time, got the coupon, and noticed another one sitting in the recycling bin in the mail room. I went back to "get the mail" multiple times that day and dug through that shit and had something like 40 coupons. No expiration date, no purchase required. I barely bought groceries for almost two months.

clush

Adding To Subtract

When I started college, a family friend gave me a $50 gift card to a local coffee chain near my dorm, the kind of place that also has pastries and prepared sandwiches. I had very little spending money at this point, so this felt like a real windfall and I intended to make it last.

After 2 months of cafeteria food, I finally decided to splurge on a coffee and a muffin, the total is like $4.00. I hand over the gift card, and the girl on the register gives me this incredulous look. it was like I had just handed her monopoly money. Immediately this feels like it's going to be an problem. She asks me where I got it. I tell her it was a gift. She rolls her eyes at me, clearly irritated. She says they don't usually take gift cards, I guess they were pretty new at that point, but it was a branded plastic scannable card, obviously legit, so i politely ask if she can try it. She sucks her teeth and starts punching at the screen. 2 or 3 minutes of sighing and rolling her eyes go by and she appears to finish the transaction, hands me my receipt and throws the gift card on the counter without a word.

I'm kind of taken aback at this point by her attitude, but look at the receipt and see my gift card total is now $54. She credited my card with $4. I realize i'm trying my luck here but i quickly grab a sandwich and drink from the case and say, sorry i forgot i wanted to get these too. She rolls her eyes at me again and rings them up. The total is $12. Punches at the screen for a while again, prints my receipt - my new total is $66. Despite being a broke student, I probably would have pointed out the mistake if she hadn't been so rude. Also I figured it was a one time thing, it couldn't happen again, right?

WRONG. The next few months I got the total of that card up to almost $200.

I ate very well that semester.

_PM_MEGOODVIBES

Winning With Mom On Your Side

In high school we had a fairly expensive cafeteria and I ate A LOT as a teenager. We also had a yearly fundraiser for the school that auctioned off things like the best parking spot, front row at graduation and free lunch for the year. After my freshman year my mom smartly added up all the money I had spent on lunch the past year and decided that was her limit on trying to win the free lunch in the auction.

She got it easily.

I burnt that place to the ground my sophomore year and again my junior year taking full advantage of that unlimited lunch.

They did not offer the lunch deal at the auction when my senior year rolled around.

Playing For Free

When I was broke I forgot to disable auto-renew for x-box Live so when the charge hit my account, I had to call them and ask for a refund. Super simple process and I had my money back the next day.

And to my delight they forgot to remove my Live access.

I had it for a whole year. When it was time to renew, I paid, called them the next day to cancel, and sure enough had free x-box live for another year.

Asylem

Getting The Casino To Pay? That's New

I used to work in an office building downtown. Parking was expensive. Most places were about 10 bucks a day. So approximately 200 bucks a month. A bus pass for the month was about 80 bucks.

Then i discovered the casino paradox. If you parked at the casino, it cost 10 dollars. Expensive right? If you signed up for a casino club card, and you spun 10 dollars worth of slot machine, parking was free. Usually, you're left with about 6 bucks out of your original 10. Bad if you're purely gambling but now parking costed you 4 dollars.

Things got even juicer when the local sports team had a coupon for 5 dollars in free play on the back of each and every 50/50 ticket for an entire season. Since everyone loses they left their left over tickets all over, which I picked up. Now, with my free play money, I was technically getting paid to park downtown!!

riderfan07

Thanks, Tony the Tiger

A few years ago, a cereal brand had a promotion, where a box their new cereal included a coupon for another free box of cereal.

Presumably, the intention was that you would buy one and get one free. But you could use the coupon to get a free box of cereal that included another coupon.

So, I bought one box of cereal at the start of summer, and then continually used the coupons to get more of that cereal for the next several months.

FigBits

Beer On Your Birthday

I bought beer once at the grocery store using the self checkout line. When you ring up booze on the kiosks, it'll say it's calling for an attendant so they can check your ID. When the lady came over, she looked at my ID and then hit the top corner of the screen, input a four digit code and then typed in my birthdate. I saw her code.

So now whenever there's a long wait at the kiosk (because there's only the one lady for about ten machines) I will just put in the code and my birthday myself. Oh and you have to make sure you turn off the volume on your kiosk or it will say "ID check required" very loudly. I've only done it a couple times but nobody has stopped me.

Fanshelpmesleep

Taking One And Doubling It

I took advantage of a retail websites online gift card sale. They were offering "gift cards" for 25% off, for a weekend sale. The great part about it was that they weren't actually gift cards they were just codes that they emailed to you to act as gift cards, allowing you to use it instantly. Well... it turns out you could buy gift cards with gift cards, for any amount. So my 17 year old self turned $20 into $650, over the course of about 4 hours and bought a brand new snowboard set up! I have never seen them run that sale again.

Givemeananswer61

Free Coffee = Life

Years ago, a convenience store had emailed coupons for free cup of coffee. I had to print it myself cuz for some reason it wouldn't scan on my phone. So I printed it and used it and got my free large coffee. All good so far.

Then I thought it'd be worth trying to print again and use it. They scanned the bar code so I thought the system would definitely know if it has been used. Guess what? That wasn't the case. I printed coupons and made copies. My brothers and parents love this coffee. We used to print the coupons and use it EVERY morning for 7 months.

massivelight

Not Even Sure How This One Works...

A few years ago, there was an app that was kind of caught on called Pocket Points. The aim of the app was to reduce smartphone usage in classrooms by giving you "points" when the screen was locked and not in use. You could use the points on deals local to your area, one of which was a pizza place that pretty much across the street of my college campus. The points were only generated when your location data said you were in a classroom, which was determined by "being in a building within a college campus".

I wanted free pizza and I did not have the patience to wait for it, so I emulated an android phone on a spare laptop I had and downloaded the app onto the emulated phone. I was able to set the location of the phone to be my college campus, which allowed me to passively generate points all day with no effort. I don't think they had any infrastructure in place to deal with that methodology. When I wanted to cash in, I'd log into the account on my actual phone and redeem the points for some good good free-zza.

I ate a good number of pizzas for free until they changed the way their deal was set up. (Instead of a fully free pizza, it turned into a BOGO deal). But I probably had like 7 pizzas for free because of this, which was totally worth the ~2 hours to figure out how to effectively emulate the phone.

cakeslap

Rolling In Rebels

We have drive-thru coffee shops. They have coffee drinks, smoothies, Italian sodas, iced teas, energy drinks, etc... And they are on every corner in town. On your birthday you get a free drink---any kind, any size, no matter how expensive it is. You just pull up, tell them it's your birthday and tell them what you want and they say Happy Birthday and give you your free drink.

I stayed wicked buzzed the whole way through the day on my birthday last year, going from one to the next trying something from every category. It was all good and I drank it all. I even told them at my third Dutch Bros stand what I was doing and they high-fived me.

I was regretting it that night though. I felt like I had electricity pulsing through my body and I'm pretty sure when I slept my eyes were frozen open. I'm not sure if I'm going to do it again this year. Leaning towards yes though.

themanje

Future Venture Capitalist

Every morning I would stop and pick up a six pack of Pepsi cans. I would only drink one but I'd sell the others to my classmates. Made more than enough to buy another pack the next day with money leftover. My school didn't like my version of capitalism.

BindingsAuthor

Start Small, Build Big

For years my dad was giving me cash for lunch money and my mom was pre-paying my lunches. I was ballin outta control with mountain dews and snacks at school.

TopScruffy

Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like

Giphy

My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308

Saturdays

My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango

Iraq

I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina

$40

With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3

Crayons

Giphy

I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold

Giphy

Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.


I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-

Tomash

Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.


An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451

Microwaves

Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence

Giphy

How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster

Colorblind

My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"

"orange"

"YOU CANT EVEN KNOW"

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?

Giphy

I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)


The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.

fox_boi2

Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.


I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.

grumblecakes1

Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

Dskee02

Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.

justantherredditgirl

Jewish

Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.

Aslkurloz

Nutella

Giphy

3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.

vault_tec_redditor

Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.

Meh75

Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.

weirdatwork2017

Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.

Frisby2007

Telekinesis

My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.

dude_bizarro

Ghosts

How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).


How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.

thebeststory

Dogs and Chocolate

Giphy

I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.

KlutzyHedgehog

Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.

SFCopperhead

Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.

SirRogers

Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.

MistalQueensglaive

Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.

BugsRatty

Stars In Their Multitude

Giphy

I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.

theedjman

Colorblind

My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

droneb2hive

Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.

moniker5000

Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...

10d4plus8

Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.

ScreamingPotoo