Cops Share The Times People Actually Talked Their Way INTO A Ticket

All you had to do was keep your mouth shut!

These Redditors responded to the AskReddit question, "Cops of reddit, when was a time someone talked themselves INTO a ticket?" Can you believe these people?

[Source listed at the end of the article.]

I was working a DUI checkpoint as a co-op student police explorer while in high school. I used to work these kind of events all the time, and sometimes officers tended to be forgiving and let people go if they didn't have their drivers license. 

On this day, a man was redirected into the 'pit' area off the road, where we issue fines to those who have violations, because he didn't have his license on him. He claimed he was on his way home from a quick run to the store, and his story checked out due to the groceries in his car. 

We were about to let him go when he tells us he remembers his drivers license number. He gives it to us, and it comes back with a warrant for his arrest. Now we HAVE to search his car. We find uppers and a pipe to smoke them out of, and so we bust him for that. 

A piece of advice: quit while you're ahead.


"I pulled a guy over because his registration sticker was expired. It was several months overdue. I asked him why this hasn't been taken care of, and he says he has a bet with a friend that he could go 2 years without getting a ticket. 

I said, 'Well, you just lost that bet.'"


"When I was a cop, I always decided before I approached the vehicle whether or not the person was getting a ticket. I had no quota, and it wasn't going to gain me any brownie points for writing someone up at 5 mph over the speed limit. I wrote speeding tickets for those were going maybe 15 mph over the limit. Heck, sometimes, if I was in a particularly good mood, I'd even give a warning ticket for that.

The only person that ever really earned my wrath passed me in a no-passing zone and cut me off--I was doing the speed limit, which wasn't fast enough for him. He then brake-checked me, gave me the finger, rolled through a stop sign and turned right on a red light without stopping.

I was in an unmarked car. He probably would have done more outrageous stuff if I'd kept following him.

If that's not asking for it, I don't know what is. I threw the book at him. Speeding, no passing, failure to stop at a red light--two of those. It was close to $400 in fines. I hope he wasn't in a hurry because it takes a long time to write 4 tickets."


"We normally give other cops, firefighters, or paramedics a break and don't write them up for minor speeding tickets. 

I pulled a car over for doing easily 60 mph in a 35 zone. I got to the door and he rudely announced, 'I'm a firefighter.' 

'Oh, alright, you have your MFD ID and license?' He hands it to me. 

'Alright, well slow, okay? Being a firefighter doesn't give you a pass to drive like you own the road.' 

'Yeah it does, I can drive however I want.'

I almost did a double-take. 'OH REALLY? Sit tight for me.'

Sign your name here, and on all three copies too, smart guy."


(1/2) "My brother's story, not mine.

There's a guy in the town where my brother works, let's call him Larry. He's known to the local police department, the usual heavy drinker with a criminal record.

One night, Larry backed into a utility pole while inebriated and lost his license for two years. So instead, he would have his wife or kids drive him places.

A few months into Larry's suspension, my brother is sitting in his car one night and sees Larry's truck go by. It's easy to pick out because it was never fixed after hitting the pole. 

There are two people in it, but he can't see who's driving. The truck was doing about 10 mph over the limit so my brother decided to pull him over. By the time he gets out onto the road and finds the truck, it's already parked in a gas station.

My bro waited by the car, thinking he would just give the driver a warning. 

Larry and his wife walk out of the gas station and see my brother."



(2/2) "'Larry! Whoever was driving, you need to slow down.' 

'Well, officer, my wife wasn't driving, I was.'

'For goodness sake, Larry! You know you can't be driving. Well since I can't prove it was you, just have her drive home and we'll call this a warning. If I catch you driving again, you know it's going to be bad.

'Sure, thanks.'

Larry then proceeded to get in the driver's seat and drive off, while my brother was still parked next to him.

My brother pulled him over before he was even out of the parking lot, and promptly took him to jail."


"My friend had just completed an exam. I guess he didn't do so well and he arrived at his car already in a foul mood. Of course, a cop had just finished writing him a ticket for an expired meter. So he goes haywire, complaining. The cop decides to write him another ticket, this one for a broken windshield.

My friend really goes ballistic this time, yelling, waving his arms. The cop, of course, writes him a third ticket for a broken taillight, hands my friend all three tickets and walks off.

My friend angrily goes to open his car door and suddenly realizes that it's not his car.

He put all three tickets under the windshield wiper and walked off."


I heard this about a friend of a friend who's a cop. Apparently, he was on front desk duty due to an injury, when a man drove up, came in and asked for directions somewhere. The cop could tell the man had been drinking, so he held him for a breathalyzer test, which was positive. 

So he's proud to have accomplished the feat of making a DUI arrest while on desk duty.


(1/2) "I watched a guy talk his way into a contempt charge and then 90 days in jail.

I was posted as an animal control officer. There were 2 dogs roaming on a busy street and in front of a university. I could not for the life of me catch these dogs, so I call for another officer to assist. While I'm waiting, I pull out my camera. I snap photos of the dogs sitting in front of the university sign, almost getting hit by a car, sitting on neighbors porches, and so on.

The owner shows up, corrals his dogs, and I write him a stray roaming ticket x 2, plus a requirement to provide proof his dogs are rabies-free. Standard stuff, no big deal. All he has to do is show up to court, bring his proof, admit his dogs got out, pay his 75 buck fine and go on with his life.

Well... this guy had other plans. He hired a lawyer! I had my case file with all my pictures nicely labeled. The owner swears his dogs had not been running loose. The judge then asks for my file, and a description of his dogs. The owner describes his dogs and, of course, the judge can immediately see they're the ones in the picture. 

The judge gives this guy another chance to explain himself. The guy lies again, swears that he has no idea why he's been brought to court, and those aren't his dogs in the photos. The judge flips to the photo of one of the dogs sitting in front of the university sign, and asks if that's his dog. The man admits it's his dog, but insists I must have snuck over after work when he was walking his dogs to snap pictures of them."



(2/2) "The judge is not amused. He orders the guy to be held in contempt of court for lying. The judge then asks for his proof of the dogs' rabies vaccination. The guy says he has it, but that he didn't bring it because he didn't think they were his dogs. Again the judge is not amused. 

Here's the best part. The judge asks if this is the first time the dogs have ever gotten out. The owner swears it is. Then the judge flips to about 8 notarized statements, and our complaint log sheet showing that multiple neighbors had called about his dogs being loose in the previous two years. The judge gets seriously angry. He slams the guy with the maximum sentence of 90 days in prison for contempt of court, on top of the maximum fines for his dogs.

I didn't say anything but, 'Thank you for your time.' I would hate to be that guy explaining why he's doing time to the other prisoners."


(1/2) "Coming home from work at 3 am, I passed a cop as I was going about 60 mph in a 40 zone.  I knew right away that I was going to get pulled over as I saw him hit the brakes around the corner. 

I pull over, knowing that anything else would be asking for trouble. As I wait for him to pull up behind me I ask myself what the ticket is going to cost me and if speeding home for sleep at this point was even worth it. The officer comes to the window. 

'Where you coming from and where you going?' 

'Um, I'm going home and I'm coming from work.' 

'Where do you work?' 

'At [major hotel chain].' 

'What do you do there ?' 

Here comes the big moment. I gulp. 'I'm a bartender.' 

'Please step out of the car sir.'"



(2/2) "I step out, and asks me all the questions about whether or not I've been drinking. I hadn't, even though I was coming from a wedding and the groom's dad had been trying to do shots with me all night. He had even asked my manager if it was ok, and she had told him, 'no, it's against company policy, etc.' 

Anyway, the police officer asks me to blow into the breathalyzer. I do the test, and it comes back 0.0 as I hadn't had a drop. Before I can apologize for speeding, the officer says, 'have a goodnight.' 

'That's all?' I ask, confused. He walks away and says, 'Yeah, just slow down buddy. I have to go catch some real bad guys.' 

I'll never forget it. I drove below the speed limit the rest of the ride home."


"My car is unmarked,  and I saw someone blatantly do something whilst driving in front of me for which I promptly arrested them.

I work in a large city in the UK. It was 1 am, and I was driving down a two-lane main route which goes from the city centre all the way out. I am driving behind a car, which is sticking to the speed limit, when the two of us catch up to a third car. This car is doing maybe 5-10 mph under the limit. 

The car directly in front of me pulls into the outside lane, and speeds up to overtake the third car. This third car then blatantly swerves in front of the car behind it to block them overtaking. I mentally exclaim, "WTF!" before hitting the lights and pulling over the third car. The 'good' driver carries on their way. In my mind, I imagine them for once being happy there was a police car behind them.

Sure enough, the third car is a drunk driver, who gets arrested.

Usually I have to find these folks, but hey, if they want to advertise themselves to me, I'm cool with that."


"I was usually very lenient with speeding tickets. The one time I considered deviating from my rule was when I pulled over a lady, and she proceeded to explain to me at great volumes how I couldn't write her a ticket. 

Why? Because her husband was a Sergeant Major in the Police Department and outranked me. 

I was very tempted to show her that I could, in fact, write her a ticket, but she was only going 5 mph over so I let it slide."


"I almost always just give warnings for traffic offenses because it's a small part of my job. Also, I will only pull you over if it's blatant, like running a red light, blowing through a stop sign, etc. If you just say, 'yeah my bad,' zero chance you are getting a ticket from me.

But if you argue or play dumb, you're getting a ticket. That's my policy."


"This is in the UK. I walked to a pub after a bit of a pushing and shoving match between friends. We got it all sorted and walked away. As myself and 2 other colleagues were doing so a guy shouts at us, completely unprovoked or warranted, from a distance of 5-6 ft, 'dirty pigs!" We turn to him and just sort of stare, like, 'are you kidding?'

He says, 'what are you going to do? Arrest me for being inebriated and disorderly? Pigs!"

He was then arrested for being inebriated and disorderly.

Turned out, he had 3 grams of coke in his pocket. We would have had no idea if he'd have just kept his mouth shut."


"My cousin got pulled over for one of his turning lights being burnt out. 

He had smoked a lot of the green stuff. He got scared and told policeman that he had just done so. Lost his drivers license for 2 years. Luckily, no jail time."


"I'm a police officer, but I used to be posted at the gate entrance to a military base. One night, three military policeman were helping us check IDs. A truck with two females and two males pulled up at about 2:30 am. The women were married to soldiers (and so they had dependent IDs) and the males were soldiers but NOT their spouses. One of the women in the back was being a little loud and attracted a cop over to the truck. 

He started asking her questions and she started blabbing about how much she had drank. Then she goes on to say she gave one of the males alcohol--he was under the age of 21--but it was okay because he lived with her. All four were arrested on the spot. 

I then had to perform a body search on the loud woman because she said her ID and cigarettes were in her bra, but wouldn't show either of them to us. I found her cigarettes right away but after some searching, couldn't find her ID. I asked her when was the last time she had it and she said she handed it to the driver at the gate. I just shook my head and ushered them into my police car."


"I tried to talk myself into a ticket once. I'm a respiratory therapist who once worked in a small hospital, and we didn't have 24 hour on-site coverage. Instead, we were on call between 11:30pm to 6am.

My pager went off one morning about 3am or so, and so I had to go in. I put on my scrubs and left. I lived 26 miles away at the time, so I knew if I hit all the lights right, I'd get there in 40 minutes.

At one section, there's a bunch of shopping centers on either side of the highway, and the lights are cycling. The parking lots are completely empty and I approach this one light that just turned red. I see there are no cars trying to go into the road, so I go through the red light. Needless to say, I get stopped.

When the cop approached my car, I gave him my license and registration and said to him, 'Officer, I know I went through a red light; I have to go to this hospital and put a patient on a ventilator. Here is my pager with the number of the hospital to verify this. Please give me my ticket so I can go on my way.'

He looks at my license and registration, looks at my pager, and sees I'm wearing scrubs and my work badge. He shakes his head and says, 'you have to drive 26 miles? That's crazy. Go, but don't go through anymore red lights,' and gives me back my license and registration."


"I was trying to get home from work. It was late and there were no other cars on the road, or so I thought. I was doing 110 mph on an empty straight freeway that I drove every day.

I got pulled over. The cop says, 'you were going too fast.'

Without thinking I responded with, 'for you.'

Reckless driving ticket, thankfully dropped to a speeding ticket when I threw myself on the mercy of the court."


"A few years ago, a friend told me that his friend was driving him and a few others guys to go fishing. There's this spot in our town where the speed limit goes from 45 mph down to 25 as you enter downtown, and cops always wait at the bottom because it's so easy to catch people. Anyway, my friend and his friends got pulled over, and I guess it went something like this:

'You know why i pulled you over?'


'You were going 50 in a 25.'

'Wow. That's double, isn't it?'

It was, and the ticket was even more."


Article Source

Westend61/Getty Images

When you're a kid most adults will tell you one thing or another is "cool" and "fun." Odds are you're too young to form any kind of opinion on the matter one way or another. You're a kid, right? You don't know what you're eating for breakfast. However, when you get older and form that larger worldview, you realize that yeah, maybe that one time when you were a kid actually wasn't fun.

These are those stories.

Keep reading... Show less