Devastatingly Embarrassed People Share A Time That Technology Betrayed Them.

People on Reddit were asked: "How has technology betrayed you?" These are some of the best answers.



2/24 When I was in college my roommate's vibrator went off all by itself, making her whole underwear drawer rattle and shake. This was in the middle of the night, and woke us both up. I was the first one to lumber out of bed and check out the scene with the kind of bravado that accompanies extreme drowsiness. So I found the drawer, while my roommate sat slowly up in bed - and I'm sure horror was cascading down upon her. I still at this point didn't realize what it was, but fiddled around with something in the drawer and it turned off without me doing much to it. She finally said, "Holy, my vibrator woke us both up. I'm so embarrassed."

This woke me up quite well, and yes everything finally clicked into place in my mind.

I said, in a voice now feigned with great disorientation, "I won't remember this tomorrow, don't worry." Then I made myself drop back into bed as hard as I could, as though too confused to get in there properly. I pretended to go to sleep right away, which left me frozen in a still silence for 45 minutes. I never mentioned this again, because I didn't want her to feel bad. I wanted her to think I really did forget.

But I still remember thirteen years later. I'll never forget. I never told anyone, though, outside of right now and here with anonymity on my side.

[deleted]

3/24 I was bored and started to look at some really messed up hentai. I came across a picture of a woman that had horse genitalia and I was about to it next to not look at it anymore and clicked "like on Facebook" instead of next.

ksmash

4/24 So I had been watching porn on my phone, as I am wont to do. But I forgot to close the tab the porn was on. So I was at lunch the next day with a work colleague and decided I wanted to find out what the Olympic medal count was (this happened last week FTR). I opened my the browser and, BAM, full volume porno of some Japanese girl getting railed. I tried to shut it off as quick as I could but it still went on for a couple seconds. My friend, and the adjacent tables of people, all just kinda sat there quietly for a second. Very awkward to say the least.

Kijafa


5/24 The mouse ran out of batteries just when my dad came home and I had porn open...

PEEL_THE_PENIS

6/24 I was getting ready to drive from Green Bay to Minneapolis for a weekend, which is basically a four hour drive west. While sitting in my driveway, I programmed our GPS to go to my destination in the Twin Cities. Late Sunday afternoon, sitting at my original destination, I programmed the GPS to take me to my home. I didn't look at the map, because I was literally just reversing the route I had taken to get to the same spot. The estimated time of arrival said 8:00 something, and since I was leaving around 4 pm, that made sense too.

Except that it wasn't estimating that I'd get home at 8:56 PM. For reasons we still don't understand, the GPS didn't just reverse the route and instead, programmed a route that would take me 8 hours and 56 minutes and go through Iowa and southern Wisconsin. I didn't notice until I had been driving for almost two hours and I still hadn't crossed the Mississippi River. I ended up having to turn around, go back to Minneapolis and stayed overnight somewhere in Western Wisconsin, missing a half day of work the next day.

I still want to smash that GPS with a hammer over that incident.

thatsmybix

7/24 This will probably be buried but I recently bought a 3d TV and some 5.1 surround sound gaming headphones for my PS3.

So I was bored one night and I thought, hey, why not watch some surround sound, 3D porn. So I load it all up, lube up and go to town. Once the business is done, I take off my headphone, but I can still hear the video. What.

I checked my ps3 settings and the porn was being output through both my TV and my surround sound headphones. Everyone was in. Everyone knew.

RuckingFetard

8/24 My web browser of choice is Google Chrome. For those who don't know, Chrome links up with your Google account, and can sync any or all of your browsing preferences (history, bookmarks, homepage, etc.) across whatever computers you enable it on. The only two computers I really use are my home computer and my work computer (relevant detail: because my work is awesome, there is no Internet filter; we can browse anything we want). I maintain different browser usage for each computer, so I have the sync feature turned off for these two computers. Or so I thought.

For some reason I've forgotten (it's irrelevant anyway), my one friend had the need to use the computer at my house. She did so while I wasn't paying attention, so I didn't see what it was she was doing. When I checked my computer later, she had changed my home page to gayporn.com. Hahaha, there's gay porn, you got me, I laugh it off.

I go into work the next day, and open up my usual applications (Google Chrome, Outlook, Pidgin), and wait for them to load. As I wait for them to load, I look down at my phone to burn the 10 seconds or so on Reddit. I look back up, and gayporn.com is glaring at me from my very large computer monitor. It had somehow synced across computers, even though it shouldn't have, and now I was looking at gay porn while at work.

Thankfully, I don't think anyone saw it (there was only one other guy in the office at the time, and he was facing the other direction). But the terror that instantly dawned on me as I saw men banging each other on my work computer monitor will live in my mind forever.

schwagle

9/24 In my college english class my teacher was reading out loud and all of a sudden everyone could hear porn. The really loud kind coming from someone's bag. A girl took her phone out, tried and failed to turn it off and ended up taking the battery out of her phone. She looked embarrassed and said "bloody pop ups" before slumping back into her seat.

whatwouldbuffydo

10/24 I was sitting in a class of roughly 150 people while I was at Michigan State. It was a particularly slow and boring class so I decided to open up my laptop and play Super Mario 64 on an emulator I'd just downloaded.

I almost always check the mute button but forgot to time this one time. The program opens in full screen mode and starts the game. For those of you who loved this game as much as me, remember the first audio?

"It a-me, Mario!", played so loud the entire lecture hall went silent and the prof just sat and stared at me until I had successfully muted and shrunk so low in my seat no one else could see me.

threelions9586

11/24 I didn't realize my iTunes automatically "shared" my playlist on a network. So for about two years, I have been going to the library, sharing with the everyone on the public network that I have an iTunes filled with Hannah Montana, Miley Cyrus, Selena Gomez, One Direction (basically anything and everything that a 13-year-old girl would like). To make matter worse, my iTunes album was apparently shared using my first AND last name.

Whatever, I still like to think I'm manly regardless of my musical tastes. I can be awesome and still listen to Hannah Montana. I get the beeesssst of both worlds.

charbok

12/24 This took place a few years ago when I still lived at home. I had just gotten my first iPhone, so obviously I immediately used it to look up pornography. I watched some sleezy video before going to sleep, but apparently I didn't actually "close" the video; I just clicked the home button, which sent the video to the background.

You see where this is going.

I place my iPhone into its fancy new dock/alarm clock, set the alarm, and drifted off to sleep without a care in the world.

This is the part where I should tell you that I am a heavy sleeper.

I set my alarm clock loud. LOUD. Gods stir in their sleep when my alarm clock rings across the land. I had used this alarm clock every day, and every day the same thing happened: when the time for the alarm arrives, my iPhone would open the iPod app and play whatever song was currently playing. That faithful day, I discovered a hidden feature of my alarm clock: if a video was opened in safari in the background, my alarm clock would say, "Close enough" and just roll with that.

You see where this is going.

This is the part where I should remind you that I am a heavy sleeper.

My alarm was set for 8 AM. My alarm was set at the "god stirring" volume I mentioned earlier. But, there are no guarantees. Not for me. I have been known to battle my alarm clock for hours in the early morning.

Alarm set for 8 AM.

Around 11 AM, I rub my eyes and slowly find my way back to the world of the awake and living. My first thought was, "why are two very tiny loud people banging in my god damn ear canal?" After a second, though, I fully woke up and thought, "Jesus Christ why is pornography blaring throughout my house?"

I jumped up and looked right, and that is when I saw one of the most frightening things I had ever seen. Two, approximately 3.5" pornstars GOING AT IT on my iPhone.



JEEKRIS. I quickly snatched my phone and closed the video.

I did what everyone does when they are in shock. I quietly chanted "oh [no]" as my brain rallied to assess the damage.

It was Saturday. Parents home.

What time was the alarm set for? 8 AM. It's now... 3 hours.

Was it really that loud? Maybe it just seemed loud because I just woke up. Who am I kidding?

There was no way to pretend this one away. My alarm clock betrayed me on a level I never could have imagined. You hate when your alarm goes off? We all do. But no alarm clock in all of the land had ever been so cruel and sadistic as my alarm clock had been on that morning.

After hiding for a while, I stumbled downstairs. No one ever said a word. But, they knew. They knew.

The thing is though... what did they know? Yeah, they knew... but knew WHAT? Being caught masturbating is one thing; it's a harsh, upsetting, albeit straight-forward blast of shame and embarrassment. But, 3 hours of constant pornographic sounds blaring from your son's room? They must have been confused more than anything else. Did they think I just said [screw it] before going on a 3 hour masturbation free-for-all in their home? Or, maybe they realized it was my alarm clock... but they must have thought, "Why is my weird son using pornography as an alarm clock?"

I almost feel more bad for them than me. I'm not sure what I would have done in their shoes. Lord knows you don't wanna walk in, but after 3 hours... one would start to worry I imagine.

Maybe they did walk in to check on me, only to find me happily asleep to the lulling sounds of gangbangery.

Maybe.

Regardless, technology betrayed me that day, and I've never trusted it since.

LovableContrarian

13/24 After the Jenna Marbles music video came out (Bounce That [Penis]) I got the grand idea to set the chorus as my ringtone ("Bounce that [penis], shake it all around..etc).

Now, usually I keep my phone on vibrate anyway, out of habit during school. But one fateful day I was visiting my grandmother and mom with my two roommates, who, mind you, thought my ringtone was hilarious. Obviously, my phone had somehow been turned up ALL THE WAY and I got a text message. Deep male voice begins to blare from my phone about bouncing [penises].

I have never turned my phone off so quickly in my life. I looked up in horror to my roommates who were doing their best to not laugh and my mom and grandma were just kind of sitting there. I'm not sure if they had heard the lyrics, but I figure they did.

Songbird07

14/24 Trying to show off Siri to my grandparents. I wasn't getting much signal at all in their house, so 5 times in a row I asked my phone to do something impressive it just responded with, "Sorry, Sexy. I can't do that right now."

lancastor

15/24 I like to use my iPhone as a alarm clock. But the standard 'clock' app does not allow you to play your own music. After a while I started sleeping through those annoying tunes, causing me to be late for school. So, I looked for an app that would allow me to play my own music. Found it, set an alarm, then went on browsing the web. Next morning, damn thing doesn't wake me up. Turns out you have to have the app open, and your iPhone has to be 'unlocked'. Ok, try again. Still doesn't work. I forgot to turn the sound on.

After trying a couple of times, I have the app all figured out. I'm very happy I'm not being late everyday anymore. Until one day, I wake up at 7:30. School starts at 8:00. What had happened? The app crashed in the middle of the night. (that or sleeping me pressed the home button to buy me some more sleep). I now use an online radio app with a built-in alarm clock. Works great.

Jllle

16/24 Once I asked my mom if she would rent Dazed and Confused for me and my friend. She was hesitant and started arguing with me about how it was inappropriate. I decided to text her while she was in town to convince her to rent it, I sent her a text message that said something along the lines of " Why can't you rent a rated R movie when I have rated r movies at home?". She never responded. An hour later, she came home LIVID and needless to say, without the movie. I had never seen her this mad. I was so confused. She finally made a comment about how I should re-read the message I sent her. Turns out I sent a message that read " Why can't you rent a rated R movie when I have rated r mother at home?"

Thank you auto-correct.

lshayr


17/24 This happened to a friend of mine -- so she bought a Roomba and was really happy with it for a while, used it mostly to vacuum up the hair her Pug sheds.

So apparently her Pug had a little bathroom problem and decided to take a crap on the living room rug one day. So Roomba's Roomba-ing along one day while she's at work, and its sensors aren't strong enough to go around the pile of dog crap. So it goes right through it.

But that's not enough to stop the Roomba, so it continues vacuuming around the entire house, completely covered in [poop], for the entire 8 hours my friend is at work. You can imagine the look on her face when she enters the front door to find every floor surface on her main floor coated in dog [poop].

PandaSupreme

18/24 My friend had just graduated high school, and as a gift from his grandparents received a laptop. One night, we changed his homepage to brownlove I think it was (maybe brown loving?). A site that has images of orgy's where the people are absolutely COVERED in fecal matter.

Anyway, we thought he'd see it shortly after we left. He didn't. We later learned his internet had been down all night and so he couldn't get online. The next day was his graduation party, and his mom said why don't you show everyone what you got from your grandparents? Well he whipped it out in front of his family, and BAM! His browser gladly decided to load up brown love for all to see. He was blushing and panicking and trying to close the browser. Not quick enough though, because everyone saw it and sat in silence for a few seconds.

bagelpirate

19/24 This may be the reason I dislike Apple. But when I was in the 7th grade or so, we were in the computer lab working on some project. We were using these all in one macs, those ones that are big. Anyways being an immature 7th grader I googled something stupid like "how do I know I am gay" or something, for some cheap laughs. Well the mac didn't like that and froze up. Like it was punishing me for googling such a thing. The stupid keyboard became a cruel accomplice to the Mac, it refused to process anything I pressed. The whole screen is frozen, it isn't doing nothing.

I see the teacher, she starts walking down our row. I start freaking out, I'm supposed to be a good kid, not someone looking up silly stuff like I did. I tried the power button in desperation, but to no avail. For some reason the whole machine refused to help me out. As the teacher neared closer, there was only one thing I could do. I pulled out the cable from the back. THe teacher didn't even notice me doing this and she just walked by. A very close call. Kids, that's why I don't like Macs.

deltasabre

20/24 Ok, so I was the ripe old age of like 16 and I went home after school one day and I wanted to get on our family computer. My little brother had been the last one on the computer (he was like 13). I could tell because it had an IE session opened to some stupid lego site that he was obsessed with. There was another IE session popped up too and I figured it was just a popup based on the address I could see, so I went to close it and it opens up full screen.

My poor face was assaulted by some of the nastiest BDSM, BBW, and other porn I have ever seen. I stand there, flabbergasted, trying to figure out how the hell this happened, when all of my extremely young siblings (age 6-9) walk in and ask what I'm doing. I panic and tell them to leave and turn off the monitor. Once I get them out I try to get the IE session to close. I go through the internet history then and find a list that could rival Satan's spank bank. It was terrifying.

So, I leave the computer sitting, and assure myself that once my parents get home I'll show them my find and they'll be pleased I was able to catch something as bad as gay porn. So I go about the business of taking care of my siblings like a good older brother and eventually forget about the porn. A couple hours later my parents come home.

They had needed to check something online right away so they both went to the family computer where they find the internet history still open. They SCREAM for me to get in there RIGHT NOW. I go in freaking out because I can't figure out why they would be so mad at me.

"WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THIS??" They demanded.

"Oh yeah, I was going to tell you guys about this...", was the best my stupid brain could manage to stammer out. After a few minutes of explaining, my mother was still not convinced that it wasn't me that did it. Finally, I had to tell my dad if it was me, I would have cleared the history, deleted the cookies, and left no trace. He agreed that I'm not that dumb and convinced my mother to agree. They called in my brother and interrogated him. Then my mother sat there and went through Every. Single. Link in the history.

So yeah, the internet history tried to get me in trouble for something that I hadn't even done.

TheLegNBass


21/24 I did the whole online dating bit for a little while, wasn't really my thing.

I met my ex at our college gym. Hit it off with her, start dating a few months later. A couple months after we started dating, she logs onto my browser and all of these online dating ads pop up (these ads are targeted toward what sites you've been on & what you search, generally).

She thought I was going on these sites and cheating on her. Truth be told, I guess they were just saved in my browser history from before I was dating her. Couldn't take it after months of on and off accusations. Left her.

[deleted]

22/24 Ok so a few years ago I was in photography class and I had my laptop with me. This girl and I decide that this other girl looks just like someone from a tv show we used to watch. We decide to google image the actress and show the girl in our class how much she looks like the actress. I pull up the picture and as I'm turning the laptop around say "Hey, you look just like her!" Well she looks up, seems horrified, then immediately goes back to what she was doing. At this point I'm confused... this boy scowls at me and says "What are you doing?"

So my friend and I turn the computer around to find that the link we had clicked on completely rerouted to a porn site. People bangin' everywhere on the screen. I immediately slammed the computer shut and the two of us sat there in silence until we started cracking up 10 minutes later.

At the end of the semester one of the bonus questions the professor added on the final exam was "Who showed porn to the entire class?"

GizmoMo

23/24 I just completed the summer portion of my program which was an online art class. The professor required our final project to be a PowerPoint and e-mailed to her the day before our meeting so she should could upload our work to the virtual classroom. My project was finished beforehand, so I put on some finishing touches, sent, and enjoyed the rest of my day.

After logging in the next morning, my professor took roll and informed us that we would be presenting in alphabetical order. She announced [to me], "I did not receive your project, but you can still earn participation points." I panicked and checked my e-mail where a mailerdaemon message awaited. Because the file was so large, it bounced the project back to me. Fortunately, though, my professor allowed me to resend it while others presented and she successfully uploaded my project. I was given the go-ahead after my fellow classmate.

Everything was going well until I reached my last slide. What should have been the "show stopper" ended up being a mess of overlapped images. I apologized to my classmates for the error and thankfully my professor did not drop my grade for the submission error or the slide conundrum.

lucidviolet

24/24 When I was young, I remember saving a lot of NSFW pictures to the computer for quick and easy access later on (since the internet was really slow back then). I hid the pictures pretty well (according to me) under invisible folders, where the icon was blank and the folder name was simply `

Well, a day or two later of creating this extremely sneaky place to hide things, my mother calls me into the room that had the computer (family computer, only had one in the household). I walked up and stared in horror at the exact pictures I hid so well was now playing as the screen saver for the computer... The hidden folder I created? It was in the My Pictures library, and the screen saver was set to go through my pictures. After a while it got to the not-so-hidden folder and begin displaying those midday, as casual as can be.

They never found the folder path though, so there's that.

TheEchoFilter

Source

Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like

Giphy

My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308

Saturdays

My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango

Iraq

I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina

$40

With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3

Crayons

Giphy

I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold

Giphy

Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.


I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-

Tomash

Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.


An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451

Microwaves

Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence

Giphy

How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster

Colorblind

My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"

"orange"

"YOU CANT EVEN KNOW"

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?

Giphy

I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)


The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.

fox_boi2

Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.


I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.

grumblecakes1

Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

Dskee02

Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.

justantherredditgirl

Jewish

Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.

Aslkurloz

Nutella

Giphy

3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.

vault_tec_redditor

Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.

Meh75

Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.

weirdatwork2017

Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.

Frisby2007

Telekinesis

My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.

dude_bizarro

Ghosts

How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).


How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.

thebeststory

Dogs and Chocolate

Giphy

I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.

KlutzyHedgehog

Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.

SFCopperhead

Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.

SirRogers

Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.

MistalQueensglaive

Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.

BugsRatty

Stars In Their Multitude

Giphy

I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.

theedjman

Colorblind

My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

droneb2hive

Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.

moniker5000

Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...

10d4plus8

Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.

ScreamingPotoo