Disapproving Friends Share The Reason They Don't Like Their Friend's Significant Other.
Sometimes your friend can do better than their significant other. Sometimes they can do MUCH better. But sometimes your friend thinks that this horrible person is the best person for them, even though it's clearly not true.
Here is a collection of stories about people who completely ignored the red flags and love their horribly detrimental relationships.
Get ready to pull your hair out in frustration.
Source at the end of the article
She has caught him messaging other women some pretty naughty things on multiple occasions. I have no doubt he's cheated on her as well.
She keeps giving him chance after chance because she's afraid of change. I think the last straw, for me, was when she saw that he had messaged a female coworker "I wish you were laying next to me right now" while he was in bed with her.
So friggin disrespectful. They now have a house together and I just wish she'd realize she could do a BILLION times better than him.
One of my closest friends is with a guy who has a history of cheating. He just isn't a nice guy and hangs around with a bunch of other like-minded guys who are obsessed with their own importance and basically treat every girl like trash. For the year or two they've been together, he has lied about various things and sometimes ignores her for no apparent reason.
Recently, my friend found out he had been cheating on her for the past few months. My friend calls me crying, I console her, etc. Two days later they're back together because my friend thinks she can "change him". On top of this, the only time she ever contacts me now is when there's an issue with this boyfriend.
I don't approve of 2 of my friends hooking up because the girl involved is cheating on her boyfriend to do it. Up until a few months ago, she was living with the boyfriend, relying on him financially, and STILL cheating on him.
The last straw was when the 2 friends unapologetically had sex with one of our friends laying next to them in bed (She was asleep at the time). I decided right then and there that I was done with their shenanigans and let them know that.
My brother dated a couch sloth that lived off of my father(along with my brother) and was so lazy that she would throw dishes and silverware rather than wash them herself.
When she got money, she would spend it on herself, on things like hair dye. She would also camp out with different guys just about every weekend, staying over with them. My brother trusted her and saw no problem in this. She's a cam girl now.
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My buddy is 23, and he's been dating this girl who's 18 for about 6 months. He's head over heels for this girl. Here's the thing: he has a lot of money, and this girl is a serious gold digger. Her Instagram bio includes "Aspiring trophy wife", and she brags about how much money he spends on her. Here's the real kicker: she's cheated on him with three dudes already.
He doesn't care. He's beginning to cut out family and friends for her, and he's even said that, after only six months of dating, that he's going to take her ring shopping.
Everyone he knows, including his family, friends, acquaintances, and myself don't approve of her. But he's completely blinded by her.
One of my friends is dating someone who had red flags - a lot of them. Domestic violence accusations, two kids from a previous relationship he does not see, an uncontrollable temper, drinks wayyyy too much.
My friend says he treats her like a princess... yeah this is the honeymoon period and she's in for a rude awakening. I've tried to voice my concerns a few times but she shuts me down.
I feel like I'm watching a train derail off a cliff... it's going to be bad but I can't help someone who doesn't see the cliff ahead.
My cousin is like a brother to me, we grew up together. He ends up with this ultra possessive and highly depressive girlfriend who believes she should stay with him at all times.
I mean, she would go to work with him and stay by his side while he worked as a cyber cafe attendant. She would forbid him to see his friends and only lets him do things she likes. She would make him give her an edge in every game we played, from D&D to Monopoly.
And they fought. A LOT.
He ended up moving to her house and, one day missed the last bus and was broke. It was a Friday, so I invited him to my house and we spent the night talking and drinking - just me, him and his brother. Early in the morning, he asked me if I could "tell her I was with you guys and missed the bus, otherwise, she won't believe me".
I thought that was sick, but I carried on with it. I sent her a message on Facebook saying we took care of him when he lost the bus and she EXPLODED on me raging about how she was sure we were trying to steal him from her, that my cousin needed no family or friends, just her, and went on.
I told my cousin he was dating a very damaged person. My cousin cut all ties with his friends and lived only with her and for her ever since. It's been almost ten years.
I don't approve of him because he's a jerk to our whole friend group and he HAS to be involved in every conversation, plus he always has a "1-up" story. He also is really controlling of my friend and it makes us all uncomfortable to be around them.
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This girl I know has lived a charmed life and is extremely naive as a result. She doesn't understand there are mean and selfish people who will use you. She started dating a guy several years older. He just got divorced and has four kids he doesn't take care of.
They got engaged after 6 months. She thinks everything is going to be lovely because only lovely things have happened to her. She literally has no experience with a bad thing happening.
I love them both dearly, but they're now in their early 30s and their ideas of the future are vastly different, which makes them both unhappy and under pressure. And they come to me - separately - to vent about it.
There's no last straw. I've never tried to do anything to separate them, they're both adults and have to work it out by themselves. It does get tiring though, and I don't like to spend time with them together because the atmosphere is always unpleasant.
Basically, he moved in WAY too soon, has relied on her to pay the bills for most of the relationship, and he makes her feel guilty for going anywhere without him.
I also don't believe that he'd turn down the chance to cheat... he's been much too flirty with me IN FRONT OF HER AND MY HUSBAND. I'm a naturally flirtatious person, and he made me uncomfortable. That's how forward it is.
The guy is emotionally abusive. He once got angry with her for staying at our house and playing monopoly until the late hour of 9 PM. He locked the door and pretended to not be home when we dropped her off. I moved her out of his place twice. Each time with a police escort. She keeps going back to him. We ended up telling her to leave the apartment that we shared because we couldn't be emotionally invested in someone who wasn't even trying.
Last straw was after we told her if she saw him again we were done with her. She lied and saw him again. Her sister caught them at the bar he always hangs out in.
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The girl was ridiculous from the start. He loved her, so I bit my tongue, but she controlled every aspect of his life.
The perfect example is him, another friend, and I picked up Diablo 2 to kill some time and have some fun on Battlenet. Nothing too crazy right? Every single time we'd try getting him involved she'd come up with some reason that he couldn't. Sometimes she wanted him to watch tv with her, other times it was playing with candles (melting them down and making new candles or something), and once it was so they could design their dream house together. No joke, the last one she was falling asleep, but if he moved she'd wake up and insist he had to stay.
Thankfully they're not together anymore.
My friend is dating someone heavily involved with a gang. He lives in her parents' house for free, gets her mother to do all of his washing and ironing, and he recently 'borrowed' my friend's car to drive to and from work, and to do his illegal activities in.
My first major strike of "I don't approve of this relationship AT ALL" was when she got back from a holiday with him that SHE had paid for, and she had bruises all over her body, she told me that he'd got upset because they went to use a subway in the city they were in, and he lost his temper because the trains stopped running and they had to get a taxi to their hotel instead.
Tried talking her out of the relationship back then, and even sent her abuse helpline numbers. I also sobbed to her that she needed to end it as he'd kill her, due to all of the stories I've heard about his violence previously.
Sadly, I can't control her and her life decisions, so she continued to date him.
My final straw with her was when she called a mutual friend screaming at him to pick her up immediately without telling anyone what was going on. She got picked up and our mutual friend had to drive two hours away from where he'd picked her up, so she could hide away.
Her boyfriend's gang had been having some beef with another gang, and due to him using her car, the rival gang surrounded her vehicle and began trying to tip it over as she was inside, she managed to escape unharmed, but very shaken up.
Told her I will not continue our friendship if she continues to date him because she was putting herself in danger, so she told me our friendship was finished.
A friend of mine basically dropped off the face of the earth when he met this girl. I get wanting to spend time with your girlfriend, especially in a new relationship, but this guy had to drop all his hobbies, all his free time activities, all his previous social relationships for her. If she was in the room watching Real Housewives of Cougartown, he had to be there watching with her - and not even on his laptop playing a game while sitting next to her. Oh no, he had to be watching it with her.
It's gotten a little better, but he married her and I still only see him a couple of times a year and it's no surprise to me that pretty much the only hobbies he has now are completely solitary. She seems very good at guiding him towards having no life outside of her.
They've been dating a year and a half and in couple's therapy for a year.
Like, at that point, how is it worth the effort? You've almost put in as much time trying to fix the relationship as you've put in the whole thing overall! Just cut your losses.
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I hope my brother reads this since he won't listen to anyone. Nobody likes his GF, we've told him so many times but he won't listen. He actually defends her, even after she cheated & left him (but came back). Here are some highlights.
-Brother came home from work, his girlfriend had bags packed and told him she met someone on facebook and was driving 400+ miles to meet them. She went through with it and came back a week later.
-Takes my brothers Paycheck as soon has he gets it, gives him a $40 a week "allowance". She even refers to it as his allowance.
-Won't let my brother go anywhere by himself. He didn't want to stay out past 10 pm on his birthday because "My Girl Friend will get mad guys".
One of my best friends has been dating a terrible guy for so long. I think they've been together for 5 years now. He was alright when I first met him but has so many different values and doesn't appreciate my best friend the way she deserves.
He's super racist and has made racist jokes about my sister to my face which resulted in him getting kicked out of my house. He has a 6ft Confederate flag he flys on his truck even though we're Canadian. Hates all our friends, messages our other friend flirty things (she lets him do it bc she likes the attention). He also had a small fling with his ex-step sister while with my friend.
He makes her live like a pig, and now she's complacent because her anxiety is so bad due to him. I've cleaned their entire apartment for them while he sat in his room playing videogames because apparently he "didn't make the mess". There was literally over 50 pizza boxes. Some with pizza still in it. She's also gained a crazy amount of weight and her personal hygiene is not as great as it used to be. It's just super sad.
She knows we don't like him, but I'm not sure how to really get it across to her that I think they should move on.
I met my husband's best friend about 3 months after we started dating, I then met his girlfriend and actually laughed out loud and later harshly whispered "REALLY?!" to my boyfriend.
His best friend is witty, sarcastic, a giant gamer and nerd, and super laid back.
His girlfriend was SUPER controlling, would belittle everything he said/did/wore to prove how SHE had changed him for the better. His place used to be a "guys" place, a gaming station set up to record and stream, two-screen computer set up, movie/game posters everywhere. When they moved in she refused to let him keep ANY of it (which, not gonna lie, we benefited from since we got some nice retro posters), he got to keep his computer and ONE monitor in a back office crammed full of her stuff.
When he proposed I, once again, laughed and said "Really?" (Because I'm super sensitive and empathetic).
They divorced 3 years later, he's now with a pretty cool gamer chick who gets him. They travel to the different PAXs all the time, stream together, he's just all around way happier.
My best friend is dating a guy she's admitted -multiple times- does nothing for her sexually or romantically. She sees him as a friend and even then, they have utterly different interests and senses of humor. There is no chemistry or love. She won't leave him because she's complacent. She's always emotionally cheating on him with men she thinks she "can't get" because she deems them out of her league.
I've tried talking her into breaking up with him tens of times, and every time she agrees that she should. But she just won't do it.
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Was supposed to go to Vegas for my friend's bachelor party last Wednesday. He came over last Monday to tell me that his wife-to-be wasn't comfortable with him going on this trip alone (which had been planned since April), so it was canceled. I'm the one that had reserved the suite and bought us both plane tickets.
Good timing. I canceled my room and flights to their destination wedding in October too while I was at it, cause no way in hell was I going there.
He lives in his Mom's basement and smokes weed all day. No job. No schooling after high school.
"You just don't understand him like I do"
I had a friend who was the sweetest girl possible. There was no one who didn't love her company. Well, she had never really dated and was really innocent, but this made things difficult for her because she was 22. So this jerk of a guy starts creeping and messaging her on Facebook until she finally decides to go on a date with him.
Fast forward, she doesn't want to have sex until they are married but he forces it out of her. Then she marries him out of guilt. Now their marriage is so bad she got kicked out of her best friend's wedding because her husband paid for a bachelorette party in all nickels.
He also threatened to yell things at the bride while she walked down the aisle. She has stood by him this whole time and really has become someone completely different.
They're broken up now (thankfully), but she cheated on him four separate times (with four separate guys), threatened to commit suicide if he broke up with her, and constantly guilt-tripped him to get her way.
He knew our entire friend group hated her though, and I think that (and my constant complaining anytime she tried to butt into everything we did) is what ended it.
She still tries to get back with him all the time, saying he was the best thing that ever happened to her and whatnot. We just laugh.