Mortified People Dish Their 'Let's Never Speak Of This Again' Moment.

From intentionally getting an electric shock, to face planting on clay after winning a tennis match, people share their "we never speak of this again" stories. 

[Source can be found at the end of the article]

In college, skipped the day to play some CoD. Got bored and decided to take matters into my own hands. My dorm room was on top floor (4th) and the window blinds were open.

As I was furiously taking out my frustrations, a window washer came up to the window on a suspended scaffold. We locked eyes for a second and he left my window unwashed and slowly went back down.


So I am in high school and got trashed at a party. Somehow I made it home. In the middle of the night I drunkenly wander into my parents bedroom, sit on my Dad's hamper and take a good, long piss. My dad woke up in the middle of it and pushed me back into my room. I wake up in the morning and go to the living room and see dad. He starts cracking up and told me what happened. Said we won't tell anyone and to go upstairs and clean out his hamper. Ended up having to buy him a new hamper. My mom never said anything about it so I have no idea if she knew.

My dad passed away about 10 years ago. Since that time my mom told me a story about my dad getting drunk one night shortly after they were married and she woke up in the middle of the night to see him peeing in his hamper.

Apparently, I am totally my father's daughter. And have still never told anyone about it.


Roommate told me to text him when I got home so we could smoke a cigarette. I thought "that's dumb, he'll be able to clearly hear me coming home." So I knocked on his bedroom door and waltzed in, only to see him taking a pic of his junk or masturbating, I'm still not sure which. He jolted up and said something along the lines of "Woah, hey," and I just said "Uhh ... hi" and then we went outside and smoked a cigarette.


I was drinking Vodka, and I had this guy friend that I was trying to have sexy with, but he refused to do that with a drunk girl while he was sober. I grabbed my phone and started looking for some action... no such luck. I eventually passed out and went to sleep.

When I woke up the next morning, I read the texts I'd sent in absolute horror...

Me: what r u doin?

G: Getting ready 4 bed, u?

Me: Drunk, topless, and looking for some fun.

G: Lol, good luck! I'm going to bed.

G happened to be my boss who just started a few weeks ago... at the time Facebook would merge your friends contact info into your address book. I never spoke of it again, and had a difficult time looking him in the eye.


Growing up, we were poor, and as a teen I didn't really have access to much, but I was quite a writer.

So I would write exotic fiction as a... release, in a spiral. Well, one day after writing a particularly sordid story, I kinda 'came to' and realized I shouldn't leave that stuff around. I went to the kitchen, intendING to throw the spiral away, set it down, got a drink, the phone rang, I answered. And left the spiral in the kitchen, forgotten.

An hour later my mother comes to me with the spiral and "questions."

I won't get into it but she described how a lot of my stories... wouldn't really ever happen and were a bit extreme. She threw it away and it never came back up


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When I was 9 I had a friend, Donna. Donna was a little more ~mature~ than I was. She brought up sex. The only thing I knew about sex was that it was bad because of an abstinence only billboard that was up by my grandma's house. I told her that it was bad, and she said "it's how you make babies, stupid." So naturally she proposes we have sex. We were in our underwear and tee shirts. She leaned in to kiss me and I pulled away. Nothing of any sexual nature happened but she said "that was it, we had sex." So I feared for weeks I was pregnant, and woke up in the middle of night sobbing to my mom that I was pregnant and I had sex with Donna. She explained that's not how any of that worked. My mom and I have never mentioned it again in the past eleven years since.


My roommate's younger brother was visiting from across the country recently. I left for a long weekend and came back more than a little sexually frustrated. She wasn't home and I foolishly assumed he was with her doing some sightseeing or touristy stuff people do when they travel. Nope. He was asleep. Upstairs. Directly above my bed. Where was I? Furiously masturbating (LOUDLY) for two entire hours. My poor roommate's brother woke up maybe 15 minutes into my ~me time~ and told me later that he got to hear the whole show.


A close friend and I had just gone through break ups and were drinking a lot that week out of depression.

One night we end up cuddling to a movie. Things get intimate. Hot, passionate, messy sex ensues all over a suede couch.

We awoke in the morning and without speaking, grabbed cleaning supplies, scrubbed the hell out of the couch, then clothed ourselves and went to work.

Since then we had a laugh about it but we agreed never to bring it up again.

We remain great friends.


When I was around 12 years old, my family was on vacation somewhere. Sleeping arrangements: me/mom on one bed and brother/dad on the other. Except my dad had this annoying habit of getting in bed and cuddling with mom in the morning.

Anyways. One night, I had a very vivid dream. I dreamt that my period started and the blood was gushing. Like, whoa, there was so much blood you guys. And in the dream, I was running to the toilet to try to contain the blood. PLOT TWIST: Piss dream got the best of me. I woke up a few minutes later soaked in piss. I'm pretty sure my mom and dad felt it too. And my pyjamas stank like it for the rest of our trip.

No one said anything about it.


My best guy friend and I both went through really bad breakups around the same time. That NYE we got really drunk and attempted to have sex. We stopped after a few minutes, looked at each other, burst out laughing, and agreed we would never speak of it again. It's been six years, he's happily married with a baby boy, we still get together to catch up every couple of months, have never spoken of the incident again.


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I was six, and we were moving. There was an electrical socket I had never seen before. I had a paperclip. It looked like it fit right in — and it did! I had a shock in my whole hand, but fortunately dropped the paperclip out of the light socket quickly enough so that nothing else happened. I went upstairs and told my mom that my hand felt funny after I'd stuck a paperclip in a socket.

She told me never to tell my dad, because it'd upset him to think that I could have been killed due to my own stupidity without his being there to protect me (I'm an only child, was a sickly baby, and am still a daddy's girl thanks to that). It's been thirty years, and I still haven't told him!


My college room-mate and I were in Italy, and we were lost at a small town train station where there's no English and no one spoke English at all. The way the train station is set up is that we have to take stairs underground, and take stairs back up to cross the platform.

We were trying to figure out which train to take, and ended up going back and forth since we barely understood any Italian. After a few trips going up and down, we decided to just cross back and forth across the tracks.

This was way before smart phones, so we were in the middle of the tracks while I used a compass to figure out which direction Florence was. Then we realized it was noisier than usual, looked up, and saw a train coming.

In panic, we ran in front of the train to the platform across instead of backwards to safety.

Realized we nearly won Darwin Awards. We agreed not to tell anyone about how dumb we were.


Had a situation in 8th grade. There were a stack of papers on a projector (I'm old). For whatever reason, there was a mad-dash to get them, and as I reached for one I over shot and grabbed a girl's boob. We both looked at each other knowingly and pretended like it never happened. Didn't need to even say anything.


My buddy invited me on a camping/hiking trip with his church. I agreed (very avid hiker and outdoorsman) and threw my pack together.

We hike our butts up this mountain and set up camp. I brought all my toys. Got my new wisperlite stove and my new folding camp chair! Guess what I forgot? My sleeping bag! (What a noob mistake. Left it in the jeep at the base of the mountain).

My buddy literally helped me lay out our clothes on the floor of the tent and we slept snuggled up (back to back) covered with his sleeping bag.

My friend is a good friend.

I think we decided to just get through it and never talk about it again.


My brother has the same name as one of our uncle's close friends... so he mistakenly calls my brother sometimes thinking it's his friend.

He's currently in a very serious relationship and last weekend my brother got a call with him drunkenly saying, "I've got two girls who will help us out for $300." My brother told him wrong guy again, he stammered and hung up. We both agreed to not mention it to anyone.


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I spent summer vacations at grandparent's house so my parents got a break from raising a social awkward, introverted kid. There was nothing to do and nowhere to go, so I spent most of my time watching cartoons and writing short stories. One summer I really got into whittling wood, and asked my grandmother if I could use the electric saw I found. She said it wasn't a problem but she made sure to supervise me. It took 30 seconds to break it, and she laughed when she realized it was a fish fillet knife. We agreed not to tell my grandpa.


In High School, I played tennis. My best friend was also on the team, and we usually played each other a few sets for warm-ups. I thought I was great, and always jumped over the net instead of walking around (because that's how cool I was). One day, we were warming up on a game day (so there was a crowd), and after I won, I jumped over the net on the way to the clubhouse as per usual. Except my toe was pointed a little further down than it should have been and I face planted on the clay. My best friend threatened to bring it to everyone's attention, but I bought her Chick-Fil-A and we agreed not to speak of it again.


I was 16 and extremely drunk at a friend's house party. I decided I was too drunk to stay awake so I went to my friends room and fell asleep.

So from this point I don't remember hardly anything, it's all secondhand. I apparently walked out into the living room where everyone was still partying. In my drunken stupor I pulled down my pants, in front of the whole party, and pissed all over a fold-up chair. Somebody of course asks what I'm doing and all I seem to respond with is, "I had to pee, someone's in the bathroom." Everyone is yelling at me to go outside and I slightly remember waddling to the back of the house, pants around my ankles. I promptly stepped out of my pants and walked home, waking up with sheer embarrassment wondering it was a bad dream or real... it was real.


When my best buddy and I were still in high school we decided to go up an old mountain road and do some underage drinking in his car. We were up there for a while and all of a sudden we see head lights behind us. Fearing it was a cop we hide the beer and my friend looks over to me and says "Just follow my lead." Turns out it was a cop. We rolled down the windows and he asked what we were up to this late at night up in the mountains. I'm sitting in the passenger seat, freaking out hoping he can't smell any of the beer. My friend looks over at the cop and in the calmest voice says, "It's our two year anniversary tonight and we were trying to get away from everything. . ." He then reaches over, picks up my hand and kisses the back of it. The cop looked at us for another few seconds and told us to have a nice and safe night. Just another couple of gay boys enjoying themselves up in the mountains at 1am.


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About 6 years ago, I was travelling around Europe with some buddies.

We were with a tour group of about 20 people in Munich, drinking at a traditional beer hall. A buddy challenged me to a drinking competition, to finish the steins we had just ordered. It was huge, and ice cold.

I won. It took me about 5 minutes, we didn't attempt chugging it, or really drinking it super aggressively.

So there I am, belly full of ice cold beer - bloated as all hell. I'm burping quietly in my mouth as the excessive amount of gas rises to the surface.

Whoops. Not a burp. A decent amount of beer gets regurgitated into my mouth. Holding it in my mouth, I look around to see if anyone noticed. Given I'm at the end of the table, people aren't looking my way and are otherwise distracted. Except for Lanelle, a quiet and demure Canadian girl.

Our eyes meet, my cheeks full with shame. Not breaking eye contact, I swallow my shame. I raise a finger to my mouth making the 'Shhhh' signal. Her expression is somewhere between concern and disgust, and she returns to her conversation.


Went round a friends flat a couple of years back. We had just arrived and he wanted to show me his new air-soft rifle that he kept in his bedroom wardrobe. We walk into his bedroom to find his girlfriend standing in front of the mirror on front of the wardrobe, knickers round her ankles, spreading her vagina like she lost something up there. Obviously she had not realised we had got back...


One night when I was in college I was really drunk and hungry, but every place that delivered food was closed because it was like 4am. Then I remembered that there was a McDonald's like 2-3 miles from campus that I could walk to. I checked the website and it said it was open 24 hours, so I started to make my way.

As I got close to the student center on the edge of campus, I started second guessing whether or not that McDonald's was open 24/7 or not, so I decided to pop into the computer lab in the basement of the center (which was always open) to go online and check again.

The lights were off in the lab so I thought I would be the only person there, but when I entered the room and the lights came on I sae a security guard sitting at one of the computers. He's startled by me and scrambles to close the window he was looking, which I could already tell was an exotic website.

I was didn't know how to react so I just sat down at a computer and didn't say a word. He breaks the awkward silence by getting up and saying, "Well, it's about that time" and then making his way to the door. I still don't know what exactly he meant by that but my response was just to nod and say yup.

That guard and I crossed paths quite a bit after that and it was always a little awkward, but at the same time we had like this unspoken agreement about that night and he would always be nicer to me and let me off when others would have written me up for something I did.


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My best friend and I were at a New Years Eve party. I was just getting over a bad break up, and he was my biggest support that entire time. We're both dancing and drinking in the kitchen at the party. I walk from across the entire kitchen, to him, cut off the girl he's dancing with and shove my tongue in his mouth.

The next day, he gave me a ride home and said "you're like my sister, you know that right?" And that ended that. Never spoke about it again! He's still my best friend and we're both in happy, committed relationships, but it still happened.


My dad and I were target shooting at the gun range one Sunday afternoon. We were up at the 300 yard range and practicing with the .308 he just got. This particular rifle has a 5 round magazine. We were taking turns with it and my dad was on his last run. I was standing behind him loading up the leftover boxes of ammunition into this container we were using. My dad, thinking he fired all 5 rounds, begins placing his rifle into the gun case. The nozzle of the barrel is to the left of me and facing slightly in front of my stomach... where this box of ammunition is. Suddenly, the gun just fires.... before I could react, the ammunition box in front of me.... EXPLODES. Feeling immense heat and pressure, I stumble backward and fall flat on my back. I'm basically laying on the ground wondering if I died when my dad, completely sobbing, is standing over me asking me if I'm okay. I get up and brush off some dirt... "I'm totally fine!" I yell out because I can't hear anything. On the way home my dad and I basically decided to never tell anyone that happened (Or at least my mom).


When I was in middle school, my (older) best friend and I decided to catfish some guy in a local AOL Chat room. Within 10 minutes of talking, he was already asking for our address so we gave him my neighbor's address and told him to just come on in when he gets there. We waiting and sure enough the guy in the picture he sent us walked up the street (he parked down a bit). He walked right in and 3 minutes later, he comes running out and down the block when the father comes out screaming at him. Apparently he had went up into their 10 year old's bedroom.

My best friend and I felt terrible. Never did that again and never spoke of it again. I still feel terrible because something bad might have happened.


Many years ago, walked into a classroom at break time to find 'S', a teacher all us 13 year old boys thought was very hot, slumped with her back to the door sitting at her desk. She grabbed me and cried on my shoulder for about 5 minutes (she had lost a relative) I awkwardly patted her back trying to hide an obvious very awkward boner. We never spoke of it again, even though this might have been amazing boast material, I liked her and respected her too much. Pretty sure I blushed every damn time I saw her for about a year after though. She and my mum became good friend some time after that... I always wondered if she told my mum, but I've never had the courage to ask!


This happened a year and a half ago on a family trip to Mexico.

It was very humid and hot during the day, and since we're in Mexico, I had been drinking since sunrise and it was now time for bed. (You can probably see where this is going)

Anyways, I had a very vivid dream that I was in the bathroom at the resort and had just started to unzip my pants in my dream to urinate when I woke up. By now, it was far too late. I woke up next to my younger brother, covered from the waste down in piss. There was even a piss stain that looked somewhat like a chalk outline of an obese man. 

My brother and I are quite close, and are always brutal towards each other in a fun way. I expected him to roast me and wake up my parents to embarrass myself. I woke him up, and he knew immediately. He helped me strip all the bedding and throw it into the hallway for the cleaning crew to pick up. All of this at 6am, with no hesitation what so ever.

We woke up a couple hours later to my parents questioning us why we were sleeping on a bed with no sheets or blankets, and we both said we sweat too much throughout the night and got rid of them. 

To this day, we haven't spoken about it, but both know deep inside that my 18 year old self pissed the bed. I love that kid.



Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like


My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308


My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango


I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina


With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3



I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold


Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.

I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-


Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.

An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451


Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence


How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster


My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"



It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?


I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)

The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.


Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.

I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.


Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.


Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.



Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.




3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.


Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.


Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.


Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.



My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.



How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).

How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.


Dogs and Chocolate


I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.


Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.


Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.


Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.


Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.


Stars In Their Multitude


I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.



My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.


Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.


Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...


Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.