Employees Share The One Office Secret Everyone Knows About

Every office has that one secret. 

Be it a juicy antidote or a secret office romance, it can be hard to conceal your life from the people who work around you every day. 

Here, Reddit users were asked to share the office secret that everyone knows about, and the results are nothing short of amazing.

Hold on to your office chairs, this is gonna be a bumpy ride. 


Not me, but someone I know. There are two middle age people in their office, that hooked up after a business trip.

Thing is, they each are married (to other people, of course) and now they're behaving like schoolchildren with crushes at work! They are abysmal at hiding what they're doing and EVERYBODY knows.

Except for the big boss man, who rarely drops by the office, who is a devout family and religious man.

I keep waiting for updates to see when, and how, it will blow up. I readied the popcorn.

-drunk_russian-

About 30% of us basically get paid to watch Youtube or read news because our job responsibilities can usually be fulfilled within a couple hours.

[deleted]

The custodian is a stool pigeon (decoy/informant).

Our boss has that Malcolm Forbes quote hanging from his office wall: "You Can Easily Judge the Character of a Man by How He Treats Those Who Can Do Nothing for Him".

When downsizing begins, it's always the workers who are too snooty to make small talk with the custodian that are the first to be let go.

laterdude

A certain girl got plastered at our senior seller dinner and got it on with a coworker. 3 days after her wedding. 9 months before she gave birth to her baby boy.

Ima_Grab_Yo_Snatch

The 15-30 minute breakfast break is not officially allowed, but no one cares, because it significantly raises productivity.

RenegadeSU

One guy was out of work for 10-12 weeks on disability because he pooped his pants on the job, got sent home, and wrecked his car on the way home.

Ineedyoursway

That Tim is jumping ship. Well, everyone except the boss that is. He got another job lined up a week or so ago and is waiting until exactly two weeks from his start date there to give his notice.

nails_for_breakfast

We have this one really old lady who's been working with us for years. Almost every night we see her taking a pen and putting it in her bag, as she leaves with a triumphant smile on her face. Everyone knows about it, but no one dares to say anything to her. We all think its adorable because we know she's just trying to feel young again.

dynomite1026

Our boss does site visits for hotels just so she can get complementary night stays, not cause she is interested in holding events there.

We all know that, but she thinks we don't.

HiDefFX

A girl got sexually harassed and the culprit wasn't fired. She left for another job, and his only punishment was a week-long suspension and sexual harassment seminar.

L1tt3rbug

Oh, so, so many. I worked at a major fashion label. At least two people, one very senior, did adult films. 

Also, The President, CFO and senior directors were complicit in an embezzlement scheme that could have landed them in jail, except for the bad publicity it would have caused; their combined payoffs were in the eight-figure region.

Wavyhill

Our biggest secret is that our security cameras don't work.

It's a bar, we do a lot of illegal gambling and boss doesn't want it on camera, but everyone knows so we get robbed regularly (after hours). We've been hit twice in the past couple months.

peacelovinhippy

Our boss stole $100 million from FEMA in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. Whenever we get a new hire, while training them someone always quietly tells them to Google her when they get home.

WalkAMileInMyUGGS

We all work IT. Coworker got his cousin pregnant. She's keeping it. Everyone in the building knows because she can't keep anything to herself. He's married with 4 kids. He's so screwed.

m1nhC

A large majority of the middle management in my division of the company I work for are a bunch of raging alcoholics.

Arrive to work by ten in the morning, depart for the bar by noon, return to office around six to gather their things and presumably head back to the bar.

This is everyday.

sleeper78

Everybody knows I do a gaming channel with my 5 year old son now. Never leave your workstation computer unlocked ladies and gentlemen and close your tabs before lunch.

2-CurvedHollow-Fangs

An ex-employee, who still has a key to one of the entrance doors, stops by at night from time to time to help himself to the money in the petty-cash box. We have new security cameras but we can't see the guy's face because he's pretty crafty. Why don't we change the locks? Because we're stupid.

TractorGeek

My wife worked in an office one time where everyone was positive that the boss was giving it to his 21 year old assistant. And then my wife caught the assistant and her bosses wife doin' the do at a Christmas party.

Detective_Fox

Even though we are not supposed to, all of my coworkers and I sit down to enjoy lunch and invite people over on Fridays when our boss isn't here.

Such rebels.

nelliebearjd

That if you don't follow the basic guidelines (and I mean basic like arriving on time and actually doing work) you might get reprimanded, but that's it. Nothing will happen. Nobody gets fired, ever. I love my job but damn, sometimes I wish I could just stop giving a crap like half my coworkers.

Also, that the recently divorced IT guy and some girl had a FWB thing going on for a couple months a while back. It's such an unlikely match that even when we openly mention it, everyone thinks we're joking. It's a lot of fun.

wereinaloop 

Two of our coworkers, both women in their 50s, are very clearly in a long-term relationship and have been for years. They own property together in Hawaii, they travel the world together, they are very obviously a couple, but at work it has never been acknowledged openly. I have worked with them for 6 years now, and before I got here they had both been here for at least 20 years.

h0b0gl0ves

The "director" comes to work maybe one day out of five. She claims to be at another office site sometimes, but if you call there, they'll tell you she isn't there either. She makes six figures doing nothing! Meanwhile, all the other office staff keep a secret calendar recording when she actually works. The company still won't fire her because they're too afraid she would accuse them of discrimination if they tried.

thestarswaltz

The company directors and senior management all took themselves on a management holiday to another country under the guise of a customer meeting. First class flights, 5 star hotel, restaurant meals every night... all at company expense. While none of their staff had a pay rise for years, and various projects were failing.

They staggered their returns to work to make it look like they just coincidentally were on overlapping holidays. How stupid do they think the staff are?

All of them are still directors/managers at the company and still run it like their own little fiefdom. Thankfully I'm just a third-party contractor doing all of their I.T systems and support.

you_wanker

Article Source

Some of the answers have been edited for clarity.

Those of us who live in New York live this truth on a daily basis.

Sometimes, you just meet a person who isn't quite all there. It's hard to tell at first, but then you talk with them for a little while and it just becomes abundantly clear if they're two eggs short of an omelette.

The stories of how you find out are so interesting. But yet, they teach us to look for clues when we interact with others.

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