Employers Share The Worst Job Applicants They've Seen
Employers Share The Worst Job Applicants They've Seen
_Job interviews can be nerve wracking as can filling out job applications. You wan to make yourself stand out and pop above the crowd. A job interview is life's biggest "Pick me-Pick me" moment. And often we will make a mistake by overlooking a grammatical error of fudge some info here and there. But some people really seem out to lunch before they've even clocked in. Employers and hiring managers have stories for days on what NOT to do.... or just enough to stand out by not acquire a restraining order. _
MAYBE YOU SHOULD SEE A THERAPIST FIRST...
First interview question, the candidate starts rambling about an argument that he had with his mother that morning - how she thinks that he's too quiet but he's actually just thinking and that he absolutely HATES when someone interrupts his thinking because then he has to start over again ... this went on for 10 full minutes as he got progressively more and more upset, ending his rant with a loud slam of his hand on the table.
Ohh kaaay - moving on. We ask the next question, and he just sits there staring at the wall. The other interviewer and I exchange desperate glances. After the longest minute I've ever experienced, I offer that we can come back to that question later. He lets out an a long frustrated sigh and just glares at us.
He did not get the job.
THIS ISN'T YOUR VET'S EMAIL BUD...
I had a guy apply to an online job posting, but all he sent was a picture of his dog and somehow no contact information.
This kid came into the liquor store I work at, was kind of a jerk demanding a job application so I just gave him one to chill him out. He decided he'd fill it out at our counter, with our pen, then proceeded to ask what other liquor stores were around so he could put them as a previous job. What?
You want to lie on your application about working at another liquor store to my face? Idiot. Once he left, I immediately threw the application into the garbage. Oh and he stole our pen.
About a week later he comes back in, said he just got fired from another store in our shopping plaza and asked if we'd hire him. I asked him why he got fired and he said his boss was a jerk for not letting him play candy crush on his phone while he was behind the counter and fired him on the spot. It was his first day there.
WHY NOT? LET'S SEE...
Got a resume from a "Chicken Deboner," applying for a sales job, and had only has ever been a chicken deboner. That's fine, chickens need to be de-boned i guess. It was written in pencil, on the back of bank stationary. His english was decent and dressed well, so we hired him.
IT'S NOT THAT DETAILED...
Not an employer but my friend told me one day that she didn't get the theatre manager job she wanted in the local hospital.
She has a degree in film studies. She applied for a job in an operating theatre and didn't even question the application process, she just thought that the questions were purposely challenging.
I GET... THE POINT!
The whole resume was in bullet points, including their name.
For the last 3 places of employment, reason for leaving was listed as: FIRE.
Asked him "What were you fired for?"
He replies "No, no, 'fire'. My exgirlfriend came and burned the place down."
THERE'S NO PLACE FOR YOU HERE...
She didn't understand we weren't going to hire her. I told her politely, because she was bad and we would never hire her anyway, that we didn't have work for her. She kept telling me when she could start and everything and I kept saying, "I can't hire you, there's literally no work for you here." Which got the reply, "ok, I'll call you Monday to let you know my schedule."
TO EACH THEIR OWN I GUESS...
I work for a book publishing company- the worst applicant (for a guy who wanted is to publish his original comic) was a dude who wanted us to print his BDSM comic about the Virgin Mary. I forget what the rest of the comic was about- but I was stuck with this guy for 20 min as he enthused about his own artistic prowess.
And I have very little to do with the porn industry, so I was just... Like, I do kids books and old comic book reprints, not porn.
JUST SAY NO...
Worked in a grocery store chain back in the day. Started as a summer temp and eventually got hired out of high school and stayed on a few years.
As a general rule, the daytime shifts were coveted and mostly given to more experienced employees while a summer temp and one experienced employee would work afternoons (4pm-11:30pm).
One morning, my boss and I were stocking fruit when a mother came in asking for a summer job for her son. No sign of the son himself. My boss told her that he could swing by himself with a resumé for him and he'd look into it as we were looking for summer temps. She simply replied that she was all the resumé he needed as she had many years of experience as an employer and could guarantee that he would do a good job.
At this point, my boss is sort of just dumbfounded, but then she keeps talking. She says that he can not work evenings whatsoever as he's far too busy with his friends, and that he would be working 9am to 5pm at the very latest. He would also be unavailable for weekends and would take a three-week summer holiday to go to Spain with the family.
After this, she just asked my boss_"so, should he just be here Monday morning then?" I've never seen a man struggle so much with giving a professional _"no thanks."
OH HELL NO!
A new waitress came in for her first shift last Sunday. She quit when she learned she would have to broom and mop the floors.
THE FACE SAYS IT ALL...
An older woman submitted a photo of herself where she needed to attach her resume. She was hired.
THE TRUTH IS BEST...
Not an employer, but my manager showed me a form filled by an applicant. Under the question _"Why should we hire you," the person wrote _"I don't want to work, my parents threatened to cancel my internet if I don't apply for jobs."
THIS ISN'T GONNA WORK...
This was 17 years ago, but when I was 21 I had second, part-time, job delivering pizzas for Papa Johns. One day I was waiting for some deliveries when the store manager walked out of his office with a job application and taped it to the wall and said "anybody think we should hire this guy?"
Back then in my state, a job application could ask if you were a convicted felon (a law has since passed making this illegal, unless it is relevant for the job).
On this guy's application where it asks if you are a convicted felon, he answered yes. After that it asks a follow up question: "if answering yes, please explain." This guy wrote "sex stuff". He was not hired.
I've seen a resume turned in with their name misspelled and crossed out and then correctly spelled.
Once was shown a job application for a college internship that had the applicants flappy bird score on it.
Was it a decent score though?
SAVE UP ALL YOUR TEARS...
I run a weld shop. Generally speaking, I don't give a crap about past history, tattoos, anything. As long as you're here on time, every day, and do a good job, you're golden. I'll look past a lot on a resume.
One morning I check my email and see a reply to a Craigslist job listing I had posted about a month prior. In the very first mine he says "do you drug test?" Ok, whatever. Most of my guys are on something. I reply back that no, it's not company policy, but I will 'random' at my description. About an hour later I get his resume. Dude had absolutely zero welding experience, which isn't necessarily a problem because some of my best guys have come in with no experience. But this particular resume, if you can even call it that, was one job. Taco Bell. After ignoring the resume, he just shows up like 2 days later. High as kite. This dude was probably 35. He was here for his interview. I had to very kindly tell him to F off.
He started crying. Like full on anger-weeping right in front of me like I just killed his mother. We had to literally drag the dude out of the office. He wiped away his tears, got on his bicycle, and screamed a mouthful of profanities as he pedaled away.
ARE YOU TRYING TO SEDUCE ME?
A man came into the fancy office I was interning at to ask for a promotion. He wasn't wearing a shirt.
ARE YOU A COUNT?
I managed a housewares store and some guy came in wanting to apply for a job opening I had. He listed his first name as "Vamp" on the application and while interviewing him I saw that he had vampire teeth in. Needless to say that was a big no on hiring him.
BEST OF THE BEST...
I worked in recruiting, so I saw tons of resumes.
It's tough when you don't really have any job experience, but I saw one resume where the guy just had:
That was literally his whole resume. 4 points, 12 pt font, covered an inch and half of a sheet of paper.