Girls Reveal What They Look For The First Time They Visit A Guy's House
Spoiler Alert: Bathrooms. Women (and guests in general) really appreciate it when your bathroom is clean, stocked with toilet paper, and has things like a trash can, soap and a hand towel. There. I just earned you 100 points with your friends, family, and that cutie you've been eyeballing lately. You're welcome.
Reddit user bepseh asked:
There were tons of responses, you guys; and no, they didn't all involve the bathroom. The number that did involve the bathroom has be asking a lot of questions about the hygiene practices of the dating male, but that's for another time. Here are some of the more popular answers, edited for language if needed.
My SO said that she looked at the state of my bathroom. According to her everyone has some days when they are lazy to do the dishes or laundry so that is acceptable to a degree. But your bathroom is nasty it means that you never or very rarely clean it which is just nasty.
I've found that the smell of the place is something literally everyone appreciates greatly when it's right but never ever speak about it, in general, making it possibly the most underrated things people notice about other people's homes.
The Dish Rack
If it's somebody I'm dating or would like to date, I'm hoping for a reasonable standard of cleanliness and some evidence of somebody living a mature kind of life that involves care for his surroundings. Not some kind of dank cave.
It also makes me happy if his kitchen looks both hygienic and like it's actually cooked in. It becomes a lot harder to picture myself spending enjoyable time with the guy in his place if the dish rack is covered in mold. (How much am I going to enjoy having dinner with him there? How the hell has he not noticed the mold or decided it's not a problem?)
A lined trash can in the bathroom.
The worst nightmare for a girl coming to your place is that she has to change her pad or tampon, but can't find a trashcan, so she has to ask you where one is or try to covertly throw it away in a non-bathroom trash. This is really embarrassing and unsexy. A lined trash can will make her feel welcome and comfortable and avoid awkward, embarrassing conversations about periods.
Decoration. What you surround with tells a lot about your interests, your originality, your taste etc. Plus, it's an easy conversation starter.
Hand soap in the bathroom.
Bookshelves, they are like a window to the soul.
I look to see if there is a range of interesting stuff there. Also to check for red flags, like if he has pick up artist books or an unhealthy interest in Hitler.
A Single PieceGiphy
More than a single piece of furniture and a TV. Have some extra chairs, some rugs, plants/flowers, decorations on the wall or movie posters or something. Basically just a little more effort than a complete bachelor pad is appreciated.
Hand towels in the bathroom. I don't want to dry my freshly cleaned hands with the towel you use on your downstairs.
Does he take his goddamn clothes with him when he leaves the bathroom after showering or does he leave them on the bathroom floor like a Neanderthal. God damnit drew your laundry hamper is 6 feet away from the bathroom door
Clean And Sanitary
I look at the kitchen - is it clean? And I don't mean tidy and everything packed away, I mean clean and sanitary. Is it a place where food can be made?
Also, are there stains in the toilet?
Is there soap in the bathroom?
I know it's silly, but cleanliness is important to me.
A Particular AromaGiphy
This isn't something I necessarily look for, but GOD it would be so refreshing to enter a guys' place minus the aroma of dirt and testicles.
Is he going to rape and/or murder me? If the answer to that seems to be no, we're probably good. I'm less concerned with dirty dishes in the sink or whether your toilet paper is hung correctly.
Not sex related.
Do they have sheets? Are they clean? Or is it just a mishmash of old blankets.
And I check out their pillows. Are they old and half yellow? Should they have been replaced ages ago?
The mattress. How bad is it? Like is it badly sagging in the middle with a spring and he hasn't even tried to minimize with a mattress topper?
If he can't even be bothered to have the one thing that should be the most important thing of all because of how important sleep is, it sends me huge red flags.
Seriously guys. 100 bucks is more enough to make your bed look appealing and if your mattress sucks and you can't afford a new one, at least try to make it comfortable.
Although at my age, 45, if you can't afford a new mattress, that is a red flag all by itself.
A Bit Of Culture
It's definitely a bonus when I see things like art, souvenirs, books, plants, gifts etc, things that show a bit of culture, someone who has hobbies and appreciates beautiful and little things and isn't afraid to spend a little bit of extra money to liven up his space. I find that those men are much more thoughtful and refreshing to be around than the overly practical guy.
Usually their dog or cat. But also if they have toilet paper. Went to a dude's house on my period and the fucker tells me he doesn't buy toilet paper. Just rinses off every time. So I sent someone to the corner store whilst I bled on the toilet. Cleaned myself up, took my toilet paper, and told him to lose my number.
A New Mommy
I look at cleanliness. A little clutter is fine, but if there's a sense of long-term neglect, like if there's a lingering smell or grime in easy to clean spaces, then that's a problem. I also look at the kitchen--does he have his own implements, and does it look like he uses them? Or does it look like he only orders takeout and lives off of beer?
Basically, I'm looking for signs that he can take care of himself and his own space. The biggest possible turn off for me is a boy I have to mother, and there are a lot of boys out there who are looking for a new mommy to come in to cook, clean, and have sex with them whether they're aware of it or not.
Everyone here talks about lined, covered trashcans and cleanliness... no one talking about signs that another woman lives there. Pictures, too much decoration, certain items more marketed towards women, and the big one everyone complained about here, feminine hygiene stuff. If I see those I'm sorry but I'm going to assume you're in a relationship and are trying to hide it, not that you're so generous to your female friends or they're leftovers from a past relationship. If you're that generous, give them to your female friends or a woman's shelter.
Before anyone pounces on me, I've had this happen to me more than once. I'm hyper aware now of any signs of a man already being attached, I'll run even if it turns out to be a false alarm. But I'd rather run than be a side piece again.
Garlic Is BaeGiphy
Smell! A guy's place can be a bit messy or unorganized, we're all human, but I can't deal with odors like stinky trash bins, dishes rotting in the sink, mildewed laundry, pissy-smelling toilet where the inevitable wee wee spittle happens, and pet smells. I can forgive cooking odors because I also like some pretty stinky food. Garlic is bae.
The biggest one is cigarette smoke. If you smoke inside your place you are gross and I don't want you.
What do you look for?
Minimum wage is often paid by some of the most physically and emotionally intensive work—service industry jobs. Having to work in a hot kitchen all day or deal with irate customers while being paid less than you need to survive is not exactly the best situation to be in.