Grieving People Share The Craziest Thing They Witnessed At A Funeral.

This article is based on the AskReddit question

"Funeral directors/attendees of Reddit: what is the craziest thing you've seen go down at a funeral?"

[Source can be found at the end of the article]



1/20. I attended a funeral in my hometown for a wheelchair bound man whose brother had stabbed him and slit his throat. Their sister was an employee of mine, so I felt that attending was lending my support. After a brief eulogy was given for the man, a family member said that the man's nieces were going to do a skit. Two girls, about 9 or 10 years of age, got up and reenacted the murder, even going as far as stabbing and throat slitting while one flailed in a chair. It was horrifying and beyond inappropriate. I have never been so speechless in my life.

-doocurly

2/20. I had a friend that was notorious for one-night Craigslist hookups with soldiers from the local army base. When he died, a handful of men in the military, that none of us knew, came to the service. His parents have no idea he was even gay.

-Anonymous

3/20. I was at a funeral for a work colleague and her three brothers got into a fist fight during the eulogy. Apparently they all hated each other but loved her and they all blamed the others for her death.

-ask_me_if_Im_lying

4/20. Was working a funeral/ burial service in Vermont and the next of kin decided to have doves released at the burial site (yes that's a thing). When they were released, a hawk flew out of nowhere and DESTROYED one of the doves. My co-worker and I had to usher ourselves to the hearse because we were laughing so hard.

-cready802

5/20. A lonely but rich client of my lawyer friend wanted to have his ashes sprinkled over Sydney Harbour.

The lawyer had spent months trying to get official permission - without success.

One Friday night - half pissed after office drinks - a few of them decided to catch the Manly ferry, say a few solemn words and tip the contents of the urn (that had been sitting in their office for months) into the harbour.

The wind caught the ashes and blew them all up over the passengers on the top deck.

-Damocles2010


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6/20. When I was a lot younger (around 10) my great aunt died and I went to her funeral. As somber as funerals are, after a while kids will be kids and my cousins and I started wandering around the funeral home bored out of our skulls. We happened across a body in a different room in an open casket, but there was no one in there. No signs, no flowers, I'm surprised the lights were even on in there. It was freaky and one of the saddest things I've ever seen and it sobered us up at once.

My older cousin asked the director what was happening since it looked like that room was storing her like she was a prop or something. We found out that she died and some distant relative had paid for the wake out of a sense of obligation since she had no other surviving family. Not one person went in to her wake besides my cousins and i. I can't imagine what sort of life she had for things to end up like that

It moved my oldest cousin to tears and she took some of my great aunt's flowers and brought them to the other room so it looked less barren.

-negativeyoda

7/20. My dad died in a motorcycle accident. My aunt (his sister) showed up high with a tooth. She had gone to the crash site and dug around for 2 hours and found one of my dad's teeth....proceeding to show it to many people at his funeral.

-bombinabirdcage

8/20. My family friend's mother was lowered into the grave by machine, while everyone watched. The machine broke and the coffin went on an angle and she rolled out.

My other family friend who was filming (she was a big deal in a particular community), decided now would be a good time for a close up. Original family friend starts a punch up with him, videographer holds onto his camera and tries to freaking interview the guy punching him.

Videographer tried to charge original family friend for the video costs. He is no a longer family friend.

-kibus


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9/20. My second or third cousin died when I was 10 or so. He was a product of the 60s. Charlie was his name.

Good Time Charlie (Has Got The Blues) was played at his funeral. His partying buddies did lines of cocaine off his casket.

And my family wonders why I rarely hang out with them.

-drumthumper

10/20. Everyone was late for my gran's funeral. There was a meet up at a pub beforehand and because nobody had seen each other in years we all lost track of time. She lived to make people happy. She was buried with a bag of weed and everyone had to agree they wouldn't dig her up to get to the weed if they were desperate. Again, in my family circle this is very normal and funny but to others, maybe not.

Afterwards everyone came back to my mum's house. One of my gran's lifelong friends (and village nutcase) got too drunk and started threatening people who didn't cry at the funeral with a smashed bottle.

My mum told him to leave, then he just gave everyone at the house a hug, arranged to have drinks with people, said God bless and left. I was 8 years old and this was the norm.

-yourcoldeyes

11/20. Grandpa of my SO. Had over 10 kids, they're all present. He had gotten cremated, but the kids had decided that they wanted to inter the urn some place meaningful (I forget where). So, they all drive there, and then the men proceed to argue as to how to dig a hole (where it should go, how deep, who gets first dibs at digging etc). They finally get it done. they all took turns digging. By the time that they are done, under the harsh midday sun, they are all drenched in sweat in their formal wear. Then one brother decides that it is his job to lower the urn as far down the hole as possible, as just dropping it in seemed too undignified. However, he lowered it too far, because he fell head first in the hole. Only his legs and lower body are sticking up and he can't get out. The other brothers grab his legs to hoist him up. Meanwhile, the sisters are laughing their heads off.

-hillalilla


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12/20. My friends family is essentially our extended family. His uncle passed away so we went to the funeral. About midway through the pastor asked if anyone would like to say a few words. Some of his co-workers said a few things, and then some woman no one knew got up.

She starts talking about how nice of a man my friends uncle was, and how she enjoyed working for him (she was his cleaning lady). Then she starts breaking down and saying how they were planning on eloping and she loved him.

There's a audible gasp, my mother is stunned, my friend is confused as to what he just heard, his sister has her head in her hands, and their mom says "what in the absolute heck?"

Woman just walked away out of the church. No one knows her name, and as far as I know the family hasn't been able to contact her.

-thesublieutenant

13/20. When my grandmother died my cousin, who is a prostitute and estranged from the family, showed up drunk and/or high to the funeral. She was wearing a see through black top with a pink lace bra underneath and a very short black skirt. She spent the entire time before the service begging people for money ("Oh hi Aunt Ruth. Haven't seen you since I was a kid.

Listen, I'm real short this month and could use a few hundred dollars. Grandma would've wanted you to help me".) People tried to ignore her and a few suggested that she leave but she refused.

During the service as the priest was talking and everyone is trying to listen she can be heard whispering near the back of the room still trying to get money off of people. Eventually, my Uncle Jack got up from the front, walked back to her, said "You are an embarrassment.", took her by the back of the neck and arm, and force-marched her out of the funeral home. A few other people went outside too. I was young and stayed in for the rest of the service and have never seen her again. I remember what Jack said vividly because it was one of the only times at that point in my life that I'd heard an adult swear.

-SavageWolf1977

14/20. One time, a man ran into the funeral and told everyone how they are going to hell. He got thrown out and the power went out roughly 5 minutes later. Turns out he climbed the telephone pole out back and was swinging on the wires. He got electrocuted, fell 40 feet and lived.

-You_know_it


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15/20. My sisters boyfriend killed himself. My sister and I look very alike. At the funeral a woman came up to me (mistaking me for her) and grasped my hands in both of hers. "I'm so sorry for your loss your father looks like Dr House" she said, in one breath. Later at the ash scattering she threw a bunch of ashes and 10 minutes later was eating a panini in the cafe and she never washed her hands in between.

-wewakeful

16/20. In college, I volunteered at an inner-city ministry type thing (back when I was religious). Well, it was basically a glorified daycare for kids from the projects - which were just up the road from my university. These kids were bad as hell man, but you definitely learned to love them.

Several of us college students were asked to attend the funeral. 6 total. A group of 4 went ahead of us and me and my friend rode spereately. My friend and I got lost on the way and showed up a bit late.

As we are walking up the stairs of this massive church, people start running out of the church doors screaming and crying. A huge group of people in flashy suits, bright dresses and big hats came flooding down the stairs. My friend just look at each other like. . . WTF! and start looking for our friends. Within minutes, the cops show up and literally corralled my friends and I into a storage closet (the cop told us it was for our safety and one of them mentioned it was cause we were the only white people there - pretty douchey). We waited there until things calmed down.

Basically, during the funeral, a fight broke out near the front and they actually knocked the casket over. I'm told the kid fell out. All hell broke loose. I did not see this part happen. However, the other 4 college students were near the front when it happened. It was awful and just a crazy experience overall.

-attawnnc


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17/20. My grandfather was an identical twin. When gramps and our family walked into his brother's funeral, it became very clear, very quickly, that not all of the friends of the deceased knew this.

-runtotheriver

18/20. The joke my uncle made at my Dad's funeral.

He walks in to make a speech and the first thing that he said was "Well, I've waited 52 years to say this, but I am now the number one son!"

It was horrible, yet one of the funniest things I've heard.

-Animosus5

19/20. My SO's stepbrother had a infant that died and at the funeral they passed the baby around like it was still alive. Most people held it, and basically the whole duration of the funeral it was out of its coffin.

I personally think that's pretty weird but maybe that's just me.

-theknack4misfortune

20/20. Funeral in Ohio, one of the attendees had a drinking problem and showed up tipsy. Everyone expected it, and he paid his respects than sat down in a comfy chair and proceeded to fall asleep.

Everyone just ignored him until the end of the session, his wife went to wake him up and he just slumped over and hit the floor. Apparently he had a heart attack and was dead at least an hour.

Kind of sad dying at your own fathers funeral.

-MadLintElf


(Source)

"It wasn't me!"

There's not much you can do when the righteous fist of the law comes down on you. Call it a mix-up, or call it a mistake, if someone's pegged you at the scene of a crime there's not much you can do but trust the justice system to prove you innocent. However, that's a gamble, and just because you've been given a "not guilty" doesn't mean the effects won't follow you for the rest of your life.

Reddit user, u/danbrownskin, wanted to hear about the times when it wasn't you, seriously, it was someone else, when they asked:

Redditors who were once considered suspect of a crime they did not commit, what's it like being held under suspicion and how did it affect your life?

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