Honest People Share The Moment They Realized They Needed To Get Their Life Under Control
Honest People Share The Moment They Realized They Needed To Get Their Life Under Control
Life can get away from you quickly if you're not paying attention. Like a small child in Disneyland or a dog with an open front door, it'll run fast and hard. Before you know it you find your life in dire straits, with choices and consequences that you never intended. It's usually those moments when you reflect and decide, "NO. MORE. Get your life together, Karen!" That's what Reddit user, u/itsclassified_, wanted to know when they asked:
Ok Reddit, what was your "holy sh-t, need to get my life together" moment?
When You Become The Prime Study Example
When I literally became a case study.
I was 18, and on my third stint in a refeeding clinic for anorexia. Every time I went in, I would be hypercompliant until they let me out and then immediately revert to my old behaviour. The third time I had a psychiatrist ask me if I could be a case study for their thesis on the rate of relapse and mortality in anorexic youth.
I was 32 kilos (70lb) at 5"4, I had the bone density of an astronaut, I have so many digestive problems now that were only worse then, and somehow the idea that I was going to be someone's case study was the moment I figured out I was going to die if I kept this up.
I am nearly a decade older now and I weigh a much healthier amount. No idea what it is because I don't own a scale and haven't in over a year. It's often still a struggle and likely will be for life, but I'm doing a lot better now.
When You're Too Much For The Study
Applied to participate in a study about depression at my school. The intake interviewer said I was too depressed for the depression study.
Good lord. Are you any better now?
Don't worry, I'm much better now! The interviewer lady set up an emergency psych appointment for me at student counseling, and I started doing therapy. A few months later I got on meds, and now, over a year after that rock bottom moment, I'm happy, well medicated, and haven't had a suicidal thought in many months.
When Your Movie Collection Becomes A Mirror
I once downloaded a movie that I owned. It was on a shelf across the room, but I was too lazy to get out of my chair and go get it. So I just downloaded it.
Then as I sat there watching the progress bar, I realized, "Geeze. I better get a f-cking life."
So I went out for a walk instead.
When Your Ice Creams Spurs You On
I am lactose intolerant. I was obese, and didn't care what I did with my body. I didn't work out, I didn't eat right, I didn't even maintain myself well.
I one day ate 3 pints of ice cream in one sitting. I got incredibly sick, I mean almost anyone would, but even moreso. After several days of feeling like absolute trash I decided enough was enough and started working out and eating healthy.
Within a year I was down 70 pounds, and by 18 months I was down 100+, and I've kept it off. that discipline helped me in other things in life, I got a better job and grew as a person, taking much more care of myself, relationships and my surroundings.
amazing what 3 pints of ice cream can do...
When It's A Good Start
I ended up in the hospital with pancreatitis and withdraw seizures due to my alcoholism.
This was on the 31st of May. I have since been researching programs and have talked to a social worker.
Haven't had a drink since the 30th so it's a start
When What You Hate Becomes Your Reason
Dropped out of college, moved my way up the managerial ladder at Lowes for the next three years. Was offered a promotion to department manager and saw myself working retail at 50, still taking crap from entitled customers.
Went back to college and am now doing what I really love.
No offense to retail workers, I just don't like people enough to make a career of that sh-t.
When Fan Fiction Turns You Around
I read a fan fic that made me realize I was in an abusive marriage.
When You Have One Of Those Nights
I got drunk off of whiskey by doing straight shots while I was alone. I then proceeded to black out, accidentally steal my neighbor's laundry out of the washing machine, and stuff the wet laundry into my drawers before passing out.
Edit: By "drawers" I mean the furniture and not my underwear.
When Your Summer Job Betrays You
I was 25 and subletting a sh-thole apartment from a coworker in this restaurant we both worked at for the summer. I didn't graduate high school and had worked these ball bustin' jobs since I was 17 and had really no future prospects.
I was sitting up one night on the computer and had the "I can't believe this is where I am and this is what I'm doing" intrusive thoughts. I really was at rock bottom. I looked at my local community college website that night and was signed up for classes the next day. Eventually, I got my GED as well so that I could transfer to university after my time was done there.
I'm getting ready to start my masters in education in 2 weeks. :)
When It's A High School Wake Up Call
When she told me she was pregnant - I was 17 years old. That was 28 years ago and we are still happily married (after a few bumps in the road along the way). But it was a cold dose of reality at 17 that I had a child on the way, and I needed to be prepared for that and get serious about my direction in life.
I'm happy to report our son, now 27, is doing great as well - lives with his girlfriend and about to embark on a culinary career.
When Your Vice Becomes A Crutch
When I had to sneak drinks at work to keep the shakes away
When You Talk Back To The Wrong Person
Long version, in the Air Force, first duty station was on Guam. I stayed drunk, and I mean a fifth a day drunk. Got too wild at the barracks and was taken in by the security police. A few hours later, locked in a room at the cop shop, and the duty chaplain walked in to talk to me. I asked him what it was like to be a virgin. He kind of laughed and told me he wasn't that kind of chaplain, pulled out his wallet and showed me pictures of his wife and kids. I don't remember what we talked about after that, but he got them to release me and took me back to my barracks.
I remembered what I said to him the night before, and it was like God slapped me upside my head. A chaplain gets out of bed in the middle of the night, leaving his family, to talk to a drunk that he doesn't even know, and the best I got is to ask him that. I wish I could say I never touched a drop after that, but it took a very hard year of trying to stay straight before I got. I've been clean and sober since November 8th, 1984.
The lasting lesson for me is that you never know when a few kind words can change someone's life forever. I don't know that mans name, but I thank God for him every day.
When You Have What Others Do
Just another alcohol related post here.
Drinking three pints of hundred proof smirnoff a day, I thought I was functional. I got sick with a virus, nothing serious, but I couldn't keep food or liquids down for 48 hours. I was throwing up & had a high fever.
Through all of this I was shaking in my bed and managed to still keep my vodka down, because the thought of an alcohol-withdrawal seizure scared the f-ck out of me.
Cleaned up a month later & now I'm at just over two months sober. Sh-t needed to change & it has gotten better.
When Your Best Friend Speaks Truth
When my best friend looked me in the eye and said "If you don't leave her, you will die."
It took that to make me realize that I had spent the last three months drinking myself to sleep every night because the girl I was engaged to spent most of her time alternating between telling me how worthless and useless I was and accusing me of cheating. She told me daily how pathetic I was and how I was wasting my time with writing because I would never be published.
It took three tries to finally get away from her, and then a wild couple of months where I tried to forget about all the sh-t she put me through while also swinging on a roller coaster of depression.
6 years later and I've had a short story published, a novel published, and I've been in therapy to fix the things she did to my brain.
When Your Best Friend Leaves you
When my best friend told me to get out of his apartment after I showed up there after a 3.5 day drug bender.
I must've said something to him but I can't remember for the life of me what it was. He's spoken to me exactly one time since.
I miss him but I've gotten sober and I got a new job and go to the gym every other day now.
When Those Who Are Silent Speak Up
Told my nonconfrontational dad that I thought I had a drinking problem.
Having him flat out tell me I really did have a drinking problem was the end of me drinking.
When It's Every Part Of Your Life
3 years of unemployment and realizing that every problem was because of my presentation, drug use & how I spoke.
I spent 3 months losing flab (370-340), sold my PC and gaming stuff and bought some new clothing and got a haircut, started NA for my meth addiction and shotgunned my pathetic resume and got hired at a call center for att. 5 years later I'm now making more than 3X as much as that call center (18k to 65k), married and traveled to Japan twice.
If you told me 5 years ago I'd be here I'd have called you and myself insane.
When The Scale Speaks Truth
When I stepped on the scale and was within 15 lbs of hitting 300; my heaviest was 287 lbs.
Starting eating less, counting calories, switched to diet soda, going for long walks (I hate running/jogging).
Currently weighing in at 184 lbs!! (still a bit overweight BMI for my height but it's WAY healthier than being obese)
Edit to add: Thanks for the gold! Lots of support here too, which I didn't expect. I went to the doctor yesterday for a physical and weighed in at 183!!!
To anyone starting the journey: it's not easy, but it is worth it. It's also slow - and should be, rapid weight loss is usually gained back but steady loss indicates positive lifestyle adjustments. It took me just under 5 YEARS to drop ~100 lbs.
It's hard to describe just how much better life is at a more-normal weight. People treat you nicer (I was freaked out the first time someone checked me out because it had literally NEVER happened before), clothes are WAY easier to find, and airplane seats are much more comfortable.
When Your Cat Is Your Safety Rope
So this is a super downer so I apologize but it was the biggest wake up call of my life. 2013 was the worst year of my life. I was struggling with finishing my degree, I had just moved to a new city and I couldn't seem to find a good job. I have struggled with depression my whole life but that year was the worst. So I decided to kill myself. I took the screen out of my window and was planning jump. Since I lived on the 12th story I figured that would do it. I also had an elderly cat at the time and in my crazy, depression addled brain I decided that I should take her with me because she only liked me and no one else could love her like I did.
Almost as soon as I had that thought my rational brain went, "hey now" and I realized how off my view of things really was and that maybe I needed to reach out for some help. I realized that I didn't want to die I just didn't want to keep living the way I was living. So I put the screen back in the window and started to make some changes. I didn't happen over night but now I am happy most of the time and so glad that I am still here.
Edit: Thanks for all the well wishes, it really means a lot to me. And for my cat tax here is the kitty in question, Timshel. She passed away in June 2017 at age 17. She had a good life.
When The Intervention Is Almost Divine
I had just been left by my now ex-wife who left out of the blue to go be with her new thing in Hawaii (I hate Hawaii now). Through a complicated arrangement where I was living in an apartment owned by my ex's boss (this bridge got burned during the divorce), I was being kicked out and was in the process of sleeping in my car and trying to find a new place. I was extremely depressed and was drinking all day everyday, even while driving.
So, one day I was driving home from work, about a 90 minute commute wherein I would drink beer. A cop pulled behind me on the freeway and followed me for a good five minutes. He then put on the lights. I seriously almost s*** pants, I've never been so scared in my life. I knew there was no way to cover up. So I pull over, he walks up, and before he even reaches my window, a car rear ends another car at full speed about 50 feet behind us. The cop says something like, "get out of here safely," and then turned around running to go address the car accident.
I was seconds away from losing my license, my job, my whole life really. I didn't drink for a few months after that encounter and I've since gotten that under control, but damn it was the scariest moment ever but it sure kicked my a-- into gear.
Breaking up is hard to do.
And when you get the law involved, it's even worse. But sometimes people don't need the law's help to make things overcomplicated, they just have a grand ole time making that happen themselves.
People on the front lines of human cruelty include divorce lawyers. These are their stories.