Hotel Staff Reveal The Most Memorable Thing They’ve Ever Seen In A Guest’s Room

Oh the things people will rent a room for....

Working in the hotel business is never going to be boring, that is a given you know going in. How could it be? You are inundated with people from all parts of the world and all walks of life. Everyday will probably never be the same twice. And the things some staff discover. The men and women of the hospitality world could write a soap opera than wold be stranger than fiction. Heck just staying in hotels has left me shooketh!

Redittor u/ghst0 wanted the hospitality staff out there to tell us a few tales by asking.... Hotel staff of Reddit, what was the most memorable thing you saw in guests room?

You Better Werk!


Had a man that would stay with us every month or two for a single night. Probably mid-50s, short, unassuming, casual suit, about as bland and unnoticeable as possible. Would show up around 7 o'clock with luggage and alcohol, check in, and not come down until checkout. One night he called down because his TV wasn't working and when he opened his door he was in full drag; dress, pantyhose, make-up, wig, but still spoke in his normal voice and acted like nothing was out of the ordinary. Mentioned it to the manager in the morning and it turns out he'd been doing it for years, just coming to the hotel, dressing in drag, getting drunk and watching TV by himself. No visitors, no phone calls, never left the room. kentonk

Salad is LIFE! 

As the owner of a bed and breakfast place for the last 8 years the craziest thing i ever found was an old battered notebook with "Why i love salad" written on the front and then literally 40-80 pages on why salad was amazing. There'd be the occasional suggestion that the author believed salad to be alive in some sense. Looked like it had been written on and off over the course of several years. BestShelter

The Clean Up.... 

I had to clean up a room after a pimp got kicked out, so all their stuff was still in there and the room was completely trashed. The T.V. was smashed, chairs/table flipped and tossed, Someone threw a bottle of lotion against a wall, and the whole room was covered motivational notes like "Get That Dough" or "[Hooker name], the Bread Winner." There was also a vibrating adult toy, a smashed iphone, and some pants toting the line between really short shorts and a denim thong.

I learned a lot about the fine art of hookery after the experience like how much perfume they use to keep the room from smelling like disapproving headshakes from Jesus. Or how they use literal gallons of mouth wash and a ton of disposable toothbrushes (they must be training to become dentists).

Overall I think it was a good lesson into my career options if the whole hotel thing doesn't work out. AllergicToStabWounds

The List is Endless.... 


-checked empty room left with doors wide open, on table was brown bag with over $20,000 cash.

-tried to wake a guy up to checkout, but he was dead.

-basketball team used a toilet for communal poops, no flushing. All weekend. The entire toilet was encased in a mountain of poop. They must have had to stand on the ledge of the sink and lean over. Or straddle one foot on the bathtub and somehow not fall into it. It took devotion. Horrible and wtf at the same time. Woebegone67

Happiness in the bathroom....


I was visiting my mother's old college friend at a hotel in Jacksonville, Florida. My mom didn't say why we were going to go visit her in her hotel room of all places. Well, when we get to her room I immediately noticed the air conditioner was turned all the way down and there were towels all over the floor. We walk in and she just grins and says "look in the bathroom." Well... as soon as we walked in we noticed 6 penguins hopping in and out of the tub filled with ice. She worked for Sea World and apparently when they travel with the penguins, they hang out in the rooms with them was awesome. arangus

Join us?

I was once delivering a food service tray to a young couple. After knocking and hearing "come in" I tried to fish the keys out of my pocket but just couldn't wrestle the tray etc. So I called out that I couldn't open the door.

The lady came to the door and tried to open it just a crack but again we couldn't get the tray through the small opening. "F**k this!" she says and throws the door open. I was literally shocked because 1. She looked like a Victoria secret model and was wearing a really nice matching bra and French knicker set (purple with white lace in case you're wondering) and 2. Her boyfriend was coming out of the shower in his towel, dripping wet looking like some kind of superhero caught between cases.

All three of us laughed it off but I'll never forget how both looked so shocked and yet were the hottest real life couple I've seen ever since. IGiveBagAdvice

Room 405.

I used to work as a chambermaid in a hotel and 1 day my supervisor told me to inspect room 405 because a colleague was doing her rounds and hadn't returned.

I entered said room quietly and walked in on another maid having sex with the hotel Jr manager. She was mid 20s and he was 50 something.

They didn't see me, I quietly exited and pretended I didn't see anything. I returned to my supervisor and said the room was empty as I didn't want to get involved. wannabebunny23

The Stench....

I used to work in a hotel as a summer job and was the first one to enter a room when a guest had left. This hotel had some very expensive rooms. One day I was greeted with a disgusting smell while entering one of the expensive rooms.

The bath was flooded, the shower was used as a toilet, leftover food was scattered on the carpet. The best part was a trashbag full of human waste next to the bed. Closed the door and rang my boss.

The hotel had to completely renovate the whole room and the guest was charged a not so small amount of money (don't remember how much exactly.) This was the worst case that I came across but it happens more often then you think. Marverus

Lady Parts...

Worked at a high end resort with private homes, cabins, and a few general lodging buildings. One of the general buildings had 11 rooms and a common area on the first floor with a TV, fireplaces, etc. One of the private owners was staying in one of the rooms (think he home was being worked on, but she wanted to use the resort amenities).

She proceeded to get extremely drunk at dinner and go back to her room. It's close to midnight and I'm doing my final rounds before heading home for the night. I walk into the common area of the lodge and find Ms. Private Owner passed out on one of the coaches face down, @ss up in a night gown that was pulled up revealing all her parts.

I called my Night Audit to come help me rouse her and get her back to her room. I didn't want to be the only one there when she woke to avoid any type of harassment blame. We spent about 10 minutes trying to get her awake before she finally came to and let us carry her back to her room/bed. The whole time she was thanking us and asking us to "stay the night with her" wink wink. We refused, got her into bed with a bottle of water and some aspirin on the bedside table. She never mentioned anything to either of us again. Wthermans

The Morgue.


Dead people. Sadly, if you work in this profession, on a long enough timeline, this will happen. MrShkreliRS

Yep you get to be maintenance, housekeeping, coroner, and everything else for $10 an hour with no food or bathroom breaks for 8 hours + SuperHotelWorker2007


Not Staff but a guest. I was staying at a Hotel in Tennessee. I think it was a Holiday Inn. This was like 5 years ago. So I was in my room watching TV during the day. I hear what sounds like sex in the room next to mine. It keeps going on for a few hours. There were a number of breaks and stops during it. I could hear the guy asking If she was alright and how she was doing. she was really loud and hamming it up. I eventually put it together, that they were filming a porn. A_Drunk_Monkey

And your name is?

As a guest, weirdest thing that ever happened was that a really cute blonde in a suit walked straight into my room. I was seated naked on the couch talking to my SO and I jumped up in shock. Ensued a really awkward moment.

Apparently she got the wrong room + her key card could open ours (a master key?)... still not sure how this could ever happen. Hotel compensated us with champagne. dw_jb

You're a Doll....


There was this one guy who stayed at least one night every week and he always requested the same room. We thought he was maybe making drug deals or something so we searched the room after he checked out one day.

Turns out he was hiding a blowup doll under the mattresses. We threw it away and he only came back once after that. I kinda felt bad for him. AbohZati

So. Rude.

We had a high school soccer tournament in town for a few days. When I went to clean the room, I was initially very excited because the beds were already made, so I just had to clean the bathroom, vacuum, and take out the trash.

I put my hand on one of the beds while I was getting back up from picking something up off the floor and heard this awful crunch. Pull back the sheet, and there's a layer of potato chips all spread out between the bottom and top sheets.

I had to strip both beds and remake them, and then vacuum again because of how many chips ended up on the floor during that process. I was blessed to not have that room again during their stay, but over the next several days other housekeepers discovered similar incidents involving shaving cream, craft supplies, and silly string. Little animals.

It wasn't the grossest room I ever cleaned by a long stretch, but I feel like its a better story than forgotten anal beads, booze bottles, and the general grossness of people who do their own hair removal in hotel bathrooms. (Honest to God, you'd think an alpaca got drunk in the shower.) MrsMeredith

Roar and Run! 

A bear.

First, you gotta understand that a lot needs to happen for this to occur. Our lowest floor, was still about a meter and a half from the ground, and each outside room had a balcony rail. However, a guest had decided to want to unload his motorcycle from his truck and leave the ramp down, so (I'm assuming) he could ride the bike up when he was done.

The guest that was staying in the room had room service, decided to leave the food uncovered and the balcony doors open, and later went to the hotel pool/spa to relax. Upon returning, they had gone to us at reception and said that there was a bear in the room. Puzzled, we quietly approached the room and slowly opened the door. Lo and behold, there was a bear eating room service and making a mess of my afternoon.

We called Parks Canada to deal with it. Guest was not charged a cleaning fee. little_asian_man_89


A woman came down to the front office and told me her TV isn't working and it needs to be fixed. I told her I could do it but I would be in her room and if that's fine with her.

She told me to go ahead and left the hotel. I went to her room and walked to the TV. Looking at her bed I saw a ball choker, cuffs and a whip. I was like. Damn girl.... Well I fixed her TV and saw her the next day on check out. explision

I can't breathe!!

Entering the room was like walking into a giant's bladder. The smell of pee - ancient, stale, concentrated pee - was overwhelming, and my first thought was that I was going to find the sheets or carpets soaked, or the toilet overflowing. But despite the smell, there wasn't a drop of urine anywhere, or any visible source for the phantom pee stench.

What there was was noodles. Two empty bags of takeaway from the Wagamama's next door, and all the contents upended into the bed. The white sheets were slick with noodles and duck teriyaki, the smell mingling with the pee-miasma that filled the room.

As I gingerly pulled the noodle-soaked sheets from the bed, a huge, greasy c**k-pump covered in semen rolled out and flopped onto the floor. The bin contained used c**k-rings. I cleaned the room as best I could, and tried my best to cover up the smell with air-fresheners, but nothing could get rid of the smell. The room was offline for days, just trying to air out the stink. CelestialMollusc



Cats. Cats everywhere. And a $100 tip with a not that said, "thanks for taking care of these guys, be back in a week."

She didn't come back. Flapdoodle65

You're Hilarious. Not. 

My buddies and I created such a scenario once. We had just finished up the Marine Corps Ball in Vegas and our buddy was still passed out drunk when we went to check on him. So we rolled him up in every sheet and blanket we could find so the cleaning staff would stumble across him then waited in the room next door. Sure enough, the cleaning lady shows up and unearths a 6'4" 245 pound Marine much to both of their surprise. He screamed like a girl and she started swearing at him in Spanish. It was hilarious. Vict0r117

16? That's Ambitious! 

Not me, but my wife worked for a well known hotel chain. She had a call to send up 12 bottles of champagne to one of the high end suites. She walked in to Mike Tyson with 16 scantily clad Asian escorts. callingacrab


Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like


My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308


My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango


I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina


With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3



I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold


Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.

I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-


Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.

An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451


Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence


How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster


My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"



It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?


I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)

The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.


Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.

I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.


Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.


Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.



Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.




3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.


Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.


Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.


Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.



My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.



How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).

How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.


Dogs and Chocolate


I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.


Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.


Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.


Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.


Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.


Stars In Their Multitude


I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.



My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.


Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.


Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...


Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.