‘I Had To Walk Out Of The Room.’ Humiliated People Admit The Dumbest Thing That Actually Came Out Of Their Mouth.

No matter our age, there are always things we've said that when we look back on, make us cringe with embarrassment.

Here, people reveal the dumbest thing that actually came out of their mouth.

1/29. I played high school hockey and after beating one of our rivals I was so full of adrenaline that while going into our locker room which was right next to the other team, I yelled, "WE JUST SUCKED YOUR WIENERS!" I was never good at trash talking.


2/29. A guy got in the elevator pushing a double stroller. In one half of the stroller was the tiniest little newborn baby I've ever seen in my life. The other half was covered with a baby blanket.

I wondered if he had newborn twins, or if he had one newborn and one toddler.

Unfortunately, what came out of my mouth was "Are they both the same kind?"


3/29. Pulled into parking lot - "Holy crap I think they towed my car."

...I was driving my car.


4/29. I woke up from a deep sleep and had to pee really bad, but saw the bathroom door was closed. I knew it was only me and my dad home so I ran downstairs, found him in the living room and yelled "Are you in the bathroom???" he slowly shook his head and I ran back upstairs. Woke up later and remembered, embarrassment followed.


5/29. (Talking to boss on phone)

Boss: Okay, nice job on that case. Talk to you later.

Me: Okay, love you too!


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6/29. "Can you let me go this time? I just got a ticket last week for speeding on this same road."


7/29. When my dad and brother were in London for 4th of July. I remember saying "I bet their fourth of July fireworks are insane!" My sister just looked at me like, "You're such a freaking moron."


8/29. One time a waiter asked me what I wanted to order and I panicked and just yelled "NO". Whole family still makes fun of because of it.


9/29. As a freshman in high school, I was selected to give a speech to the local Rotary Club on "my vision of the future." Really big event to a 14 year old, there were 100 or so people and a fancy dinner.

Anyway, I got nervous during my speech, got distracted looking at my note cards and blurted out "we will live in a future where people are judged on the color of their skin and not the content of their character."


10/29. One morning, after another sleepless night (I had episodes of insomnia when I was in my young twenties) , I went to work by train.

There were sliding doors between the cars and exits. The door in my car was actually open. So I slid it shut, then walked headfirst into it. Hurt like hell. Took me a while to fully grasp the scope of my stupidity.

Other passengers were, understandably, perplexed and looked at me like there was something really wrong and dangerous about me.

I said: "It's okay. He's fine."


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11/29. I was in Lush (soap store) getting Christmas presents for my two sisters.

Shop attendant: So, who are the gifts for?

Me: My Sisters.

Shop attendant: OK, what size?

Me: Hmm...thinks for a moment... They're about 5ft2 and 5ft4.

Shop attendant: I meant the presents.


12/29. I am half Hispanic, half white, but could pass for Black. I was adopted by a German/Irish mother and a Russian Jewish father (read: extremely white people).

One day as a teenager I absentmindedly asked my mother "Did you and dad ever think about not telling me I was adopted?" The look of sheer disappointment followed by obnoxious laughter told me everything I needed to know.


13/29. In a middle of an exam the teacher caught me comparing answers with my friend. "You two, stop that right now!" said the teacher, and what came out of my mouth was, "Wait just a second, we're almost done."


14/29. I was on hold with my doctor's office, and during the hold, it was all these advertisements for their new birthing suites, prenatal center, and whatever. I was on hold for about three minutes listening to this on repeat and then all of a sudden the receptionist picks up with "NAME AND DATE OF BIRTH, Please."

"My name is _____ and um... I'm not pregnant. Did I call the wrong number?"

"This is [name of place]."

"That's where I meant to call. I need to set up an appointment."

"Okay, can I get your date of birth?"

"Um... I'm not expecting."

(I can tell by the way she spoke the next questions that she didn't think English was my native language, and in retrospect I don't blame her.)

"Your birthday. The day you were born."

IN MY DEFENCE... I had mono and I was really, REALLY tired.


15/29. Girl who notices me watching her dancing at the bar: "Do you like what you see?!?"

Me trying to downplay just how much I liked it: "I've seen better."


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16/29. Crossing the border back into America from Mexico, sweating bullets because all my paperwork and ID got stolen, and a border guard says "Everybody in here American?"

I replied, "S seor."


17/29. "90 minutes? I thought we had an hour and a half!" I STILL get made fun of for that.


18/29. I walked into work one day and said to a girl, "Hey Jessica! How's your pregnancy going?"

She had miscarried a few days prior.


19/29. Looking at a handheld map... "Where's the 'You Are Here' icon??"

I was a senior in high school at the time...


20/29. Trying to buy a bus ticket...

Me: "One ticket please!"


Me: "no.. just the one..."

"WHERE to?"


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21/29. "OH GOD! I hope the baby isn't mine" (I'm female, I had just found out that my ex had a child...).


22/29. While riding in the car with a friend.

Friend: I kind of have to poop.

Me: But I just went.

I meant every bit of it and it took me almost ten seconds of my friend laughing for me to realize what happened.


23/29. Complete sober and clean of any substances or drugs.

At the drive through of a Crispy Kreme.

Employee: Hello may I take your order?

Me: in the most distressed/confused voice possible WHERE ARE YOU??

My friends that were in the car still make fun of me for it.


24/29. A week after getting my first car I asked my father if the expiration sticker on the license plate meant that the car wouldn't be good anymore after that date. I was 17.


25/29. "Mike Tyson? Isn't that the guy who made the George Foreman Grill?"

Not too proud of that.


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26/29. "Name a country the starts with the letter Q." "......Cuba?"


27/29. I once argued vehemently with my friend that the word "ambiguous" meant "very".


28/29. Told my girlfriend she looked like a hot version of Gollum.


29/29. Me when I was 17 getting pulled over.

Officer: So, you weren't wearing your seatbelt, right? wink

Me: I was wearing my seatbelt, but I was speeding.

Officer: I'm going to try this one more time, I didn't see you wearing your seatbelt, which is not a moving violation, as opposed to speeding, which is. Understood?

Me: No. I was wearing my seatbelt, officer.

Officer: Okay, you were speeding. Here's your ticket.



"It wasn't me!"

There's not much you can do when the righteous fist of the law comes down on you. Call it a mix-up, or call it a mistake, if someone's pegged you at the scene of a crime there's not much you can do but trust the justice system to prove you innocent. However, that's a gamble, and just because you've been given a "not guilty" doesn't mean the effects won't follow you for the rest of your life.

Reddit user, u/danbrownskin, wanted to hear about the times when it wasn't you, seriously, it was someone else, when they asked:

Redditors who were once considered suspect of a crime they did not commit, what's it like being held under suspicion and how did it affect your life?

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