It's no secret that I belong to the Millennial Generation (I write for the internet, of course I do), so I may notice headlines that start with "Millennials are Killing..." more than others. But that doesn't excuse the fact that nearly every industry has unfairly had it's death blamed on the Millennial Generation.
So let's take a look at some of these industries being horrifically murdered by this entire generation of unsympathetic Hipsters. Also, because I think it's a good idea to be positive, let's look at some anecdotes from actual Millennials who share how things are actually improving.
Sources at the end of the article. Comments are edited for clarity.
Here's the kicker. Millennials are killing the Napkin Industry because they're buying Paper Towels instead.
First off, what's the difference? Are they not the same industry?
Second, who has napkins in their house?! Isn't that a restaurant thing?
I've noticed that young people tend to be so much more empathetic than baby boomers. As someone working in retail, I don't think I've had a single rude customer under 30.
Cereal? Really? We're killing Cereal? C'mon.
Apparently Millennials think that Cereal is 'Too much work' to eat for breakfast. Cereal is what we eat when we don't feel like putting effort into breakfast!
To combat this disturbing trend, cereal companies have taken to Instagram to make more 'Aesthetically Pleasing' dishes that involve cereal. Kelloggs' CEO says that 30% of cereal is consumed outside of breakfast (Where do they get these numbers from?), so they've created a push for cereal dishes that look good and "fulfill millennials cravings for social media affirmation".
Because food's only good when you can take pictures of it.
Restaurants. Ten years ago the cities Ive lived in were basically all bland uninspired chain restaurants, or independent ones that somehow were worse. Now there is a ton of vibrant fun places to try!
More on the next page!
Maybe it's because the game is basically 3 hours of advertising, with 10 minutes of actual gameplay but apparently NFL is feeling the signature blow dealt by these murderous Millennials.
Another theory is that the rate of concussions suffered by players, coupled with the high risk of suicide is turning these 'Coddled Kids' off from the sport. Because avoiding violent sports that cause countless brain injuries makes us "Special Kids", not "Aware Kids who are concerned for the safety of others".
The coffee at Starbucks is improving. I think the masters degree the barista holds makes the coffee taste better.
So let me get this straight: Millennials are the generation saddled with an insurmountable student debt, for whom retirement is a pipe-dream, and whose parents suffered through the burst of the housing bubble in 2008 is cautious about buying houses?
No, we're not killing Home Depot. Home Depot is expecting us to kill ourselves.
Seriously, people complain about "millennials" always texting but truth is, we communicate with more people in more ways and at a faster speed.
I mean from my phone I can talk to my friends in the Netherlands, Australia, the USA, or even just within Scotland with the ease of communicating with someone next door.
Twitter allows one to spread and get news quickly, FaceBook informs you of family events, Snapchat allows you to go "look at this" with people all over the world. Meanwhile my parents still send postcards every time they go away.
We killed postcards, then made our own postcards which are a lot better.
More on the next page!
Now apparently Millennials are killing running because they focus more on personal growth and fitness than competition. Millennials are responsible for the boom in CrossFit and other personal fitness opportunities.
So yeah, let's blame Millennials for killing an industry instead of celebrating their commitment to healthy living and personal fitness.
The record industry is doing really well apparently.
If you've ever been on Tumblr, you'll know that it's ridiculous that Millennials don't like shows like Friends or How I Met Your Mother.
The main crux of this argument is that there's not enough money for studios in sitcoms anymore (Even with all the reused sets and low production costs?), compared to big money-makers like Game of Thrones or Breaking Bad.
Another argument is that these shows just aren't realistic. That Millennials aren't hanging out anymore and if they do, they're on their phones the entire time.
Because Game of Thrones is the epitome of realism.
Boardgames! With more and more video games becoming online multiplayer instead of local multiplayer like in the olden times, boardgames have stepped back in to fill that gap. More and more new and interesting board games are being released all the time it's pretty great now.
More on the next page!
This claim is absolutely ridiculous, not only are Millennials not drinking less beer, statistics show that they're actually drinking more! Beer Companies have been showing less and less product sold to the younger generations. But that's just the big beer companies.
Craft breweries have grown exponentially in the past few years, putting out more unique brands independent of the Beer Corporations. So, to be more accurate, Millennials aren't killing beer. They're creating an industry for better beer.
It's OK to have tattoos and fire-engine red hair now in an office setting, even if the dress code is "business professional".
Millennials who love to travel don't want to travel within their own country's borders? Who would have thought?
Apparently the Canadian tourist industry is taking the hardest blow, which might have something to do with the fact that airline prices within the country are astronomical (And y'know Canada is a country you have to hop on a plane to get anywhere). So the younger generation is outsourcing to fill their travel needs.
So it doesn't really sound like Millennials are the problem here (once again). It sounds like big businesses are barring young people (with student debt through the roof) from travelling by raising prices.
Comic book movies. You kids have no idea how bad it was in the 80's.
More on the next page!
Wine Corks. Because if we're going to complain about things that Millennials are ruining, let's stick to the real important things that can't be easily replaced.
The truth of the matter is, Millennials had nothing to do with this. Cork has a tendency to spoil wine (Attributed to something called Cork Taint), which affects around 7% of wine bottles. The natural way for Winemakers to combat this was to switch to Aluminum (Which is much cheaper as well), and that makes a lot of sense.
Now, Millennials come into this not because we protested in the streets to keep the Aluminum lids, but because we didn't protest about the lack of Cork. Since this generation started drinking wine when Aluminum was the standard, there's little incentive to change.
So Millennials are being blamed for the death of the Cork industry, which is resulting in cheaper wine that has less chance of spoiling (I hope you're starting to see how ridiculous this is).
My beard, before these kids all started growing beards I didn't know what beard wax was.
I mean, sure. Maybe we are. But with a rising population, unapproachable housing costs and low paying jobs, it's kinda hard to want to settle down.
Though the pundits are blaming the 'Want-it-now' culture, with Uber, Tinder and texting driving up the 'Hook-Up Culture', it's hard to ignore the crushing pessimism that Millennials face in their future.
With the sheer amount of content available on things like Netflix and YouTube and Steam, people are getting choosier and driving quality up.
More on the next page!
Acceptance of others, big time.
We baby boomers may have voted things like gay marriage through, but it's because our kids enlightened us.
So apparently Millennials are not taking any time off work. Those lazy, entitled and spoon-fed kids are working so much that they can't take vacation times.
"Their willingness to forego time off sets a lousy precedent for the rest of us", is the narrative being pushed by hard-working boomers and all the people who deserve their time off. It's not like Millennials are buying houses or diamonds. What are they using this money for?
Besides, us Millennials should all be working unpaid internships anyways to gain experience in the industry, who are we to be taking vacation time away from company veterans?
We've saved Cafe culture. It's gone from 'grab something and go on the way to work' to 'sit down for brunch with friends'.
There's a lot more options and the standard is higher as there's a lot more business.
One thing that we're definitely killing though?
This "Millennials are killing things" trend.
So maybe just stop?
You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar, or so the saying goes.
The same can be said for your interactions with cops, most of whom are perfectly happy to let minor infractions slide––When was the last time you were actually ticketed for jaywalking?––provided you're not a total Karen should you interact them.
Your local police officer likely doesn't care about jaywalking or the fact that you went five miles over the speed limit unless you give him a reason to, as we learned when Redditor Takdel asked police officers: "What stupid law have you enforced just because someone was an a-hole?"