'Lesbian Sex Doesn't Exist.' The Worst Sex Ed Advice People Have Ever Received.

Sex education remains a contentious issue in a lot of places. What do you teach? Abstinence? Safe sex? Nothing? Well, whatever you think they should teach, these Redditors have compiled a long list of things that no sex ed teacher should ever say. But they did. 


He told us the average penis size is 8 inches. You can imagine how that would affect our self-esteem.

theissingm

We were told that any time a boy has his hands in his pockets, he's hiding an erection. Every boy in school made sure to always have their hands visible from that day forward!

radioactive_koala

The teacher told us that women don't die during childbirth, and that was just a myth.

toxicwaste25

The first time I took a sex ed class was okay, but the teacher was very… traditional for lack of a better word. He told us about what sex was. Condoms. STDs. Abstinence as an option. Pregnancy. The class for the most part felt pretty informative and non-judgmental. 

And then some kid raised his hand and asked about anal sex and the teacher said, Oh you mean gay sex?" He said, No, I mean anal sex. Then the teacher said, That's how gays have sex. It's gay sex." And then he talked about lubes and how you can also lube for normal sex. 

Then someone else asked what if a man and woman have anal sex and he said, Then the man is secretly gay." And he was dead set on that way of thinking. "Women don't want to have anal sex. Only a gay man would pressure a woman into gay sex so he can find her attractive. That's how you hear about gay men having kids before being found out as gay. They start with gay sex and finish normally so they can have kids and appear normal."

There was a collective cringe from most of us, but I wonder if anyone in that class picked up this incredibly stupid belief.

ktsb

I was in 10th grade. A biology teacher was answering questions and, she seemed really confident in the answers she was giving. Someone asked her, What's the fastest way a girl can reach orgasm? (continued...)


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She replied, Everyone is different, but it takes at least an hour for a female to reach orgasm - no exceptions. I remember my classmates giving her that "...are you high? face.

Im_Here_To_

Our sex ed teacher told us that women can't have orgasms unless they're being penetrated. I pity that guy's wife.

ManolinaCoralina

I was told that condoms increase your risk of pregnancy. Also that oral sex can result in pregnancy because the sperm know where to go.

My town itself isn't even particularly conservative. We just had a kooky substitute teacher while our normal teacher was gone for a few weeks. I've given sexual education seminars and am passionate about it as an adult.

ferrrretsultan

A teacher told us this. If you're worried about being pressured into sex, just keep things vertical because it's not possible to have sex without lying down first.

Well. I guess the first part is good advice.

Omniscient_Snail_Sam

Here was the best question from our class anonymous Question Box:

"If you lose your left nut, is your right nut still your right nut?"

The teacher read it, set the paper down, and after about a minute of silence admitted he didn't know.

theGstandsforGabriel

When we were eight, we were given an impromptu lesson on sex. I asked, Where do girls pee from? My teacher told me they pee from the same place as boys, so I believed girls had penises for quite a while after that.

kitjen

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One of my sex ed classes had a male and a female teacher. For some reason, some kid asked how big vaginas are. The female teacher said they are about 3 inches deep. The male teacher then said, Maybe yours is, but my wife's sure isn't."

BLMdidHarambe

I didnt learn much right or wrong, because all our teacher said was: "All you need to know is that you're too young to do it, and that's all I'm going to say about it."

educationofbetty

Our gym teacher told us that a man's penis can be big enough to penetrate a woman's cervix and get into her uterus. Actually it was a humblebrag

Student: Coach, when you put it in, does it go up into the uterus?

Coach: Now, your average man, no. But some guys…yeah.

gnarlie_g

Our teacher told us that you can't pee with an erection. I thought that she meant boys were literally physically unable to do that, not that it was just difficult. So the first time I did it, I thought something was horribly wrong with me.

mirrokrowr

"I don't wanna talk about it and you already know what's what. Watch this video and Ill give you the answers to the test after."

We had this class for 3 months and he never took any questions.

Idontknowyounknow

"You will never bleed through your underwear."

birdprincess

The worst sex ed advice I ever got was from my mother. According to her there are two likely results of me dating in high school. (continued...)


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1. A girl will falsely accuse me of sexual harassment and ruin my life.

2. A girl will cheat on me and trick me into raising someone else's baby and ruin my life

As a result, I was absolutely terrified of letting anyone know I was attracted to anyone and actively avoided girls who showed interest in me.

She messed me up well into my 20s.

spartiecat

She said girls can't orgasm. When a boy asked her to clarify, he said, You just mean they can't ejaculate right?" And she responded, Yes also that. But the female orgasm is a myth.

KitchitiKipi

Straight sex: 99% chance of pregnancy.

Gay male sex: 100% chance of STDs and also Hell.

Lesbian sex: Doesn't exist.

TUNNEL-SNAKES

I was told that its impossible to ejaculate while conscious unless youre having sex with a member of the opposite sex.

CCR_Revival

Our teacher said that the head of the penis was called the Glanis. She was super excited and told us it was a little-known fact since she saw it in one text book and never saw it where else. I think that textbook had a typo.

p3t3r133

They said periods don't hurt. Screw you, yes they do! I realize some people don't cramp - even if I've never encountered a person without cramps - but still. Warn us! I thought I was dying the first time I had it.

Oh, and they told us nothing about vaginal discharge. I thought I was peeing myself a little for a long time. My mother set me straight about everything, but I'm still mad that I was told so little.

LindtClassicRecipe

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Any kind of unprotected sex will 100% always result in pregnancy and AIDS. Possibly not in that order. This certain teacher would omit the part about protection and imply that this was the inevitable result of sexual contact of any kind.

Kids know when you're trying to scare them. The whole auditorium would roll their eyes in unison.

6079_WSmith

We were told that when a girl is assaulted, her body automatically "shuts down", preventing unwanted pregnancy.

What a load of crap.

Digimountain

The teacher said that condoms were 80% effective at the time of use, and that was only if you used them correctly. Actually, condoms are like 98% effective over the course of a year if used correctly. Her theory was that 1 in 5 times you had sex with a condom would result in pregnancy (or at least that's the lie she told). I never thought very much of her, and this certainly didn't help.

By her logic, if you had regular sex using condoms you were basically guaranteed to conceive a child in a few weeks.

Nemocom314

We were basically told: Stay a virgin until your wedding night, and let your husband have sex (missionary) whenever he wants, and you should never enjoy the act.

86thisredditaccount

My sex ed teacher passed around a cup of water and had everyone spit in it. When she got it back, she compared it to having sex with multiple partners.

BobMarker

When asked, our teacher told us that the reason Moms and Dads can have sex without a condom is because you can't get STDs if you're in love.

I kid you not.

HopBiscuits

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I was told men are inherently dangerous, hard-wired to be unable to control themselves, and that's why women should never be around them. Its a disgusting thing to say - to a 10th grade class, no less. It wasn't even a gender segregated class; she taught it to the whole class like it was a fact. This was a "professional sex educator" the school paid to bring in every year for "health class."

Thats what you get with religious abstinence-only education, folks. They even threw the "sex after marriage" out the window, too. Baffling.

Worldres

In grade 9, we had a two-week long unit on sex ed during gym class. Instead of going to the gym and playing dodgeball, we were looking at anatomically correct diagrams of genitalia. 

Closer to the end of the unit, our teacher brought in two nurses from a local clinic to teach us about STDs and safe sex practices. Both nurses were older women who seemed to despise us teenage boys. We looked at a bunch of nasty pictures of infected genitals for a while. 

Then one of the nurses abruptly went on a rant about how one of her friends slept with a guy in high school. They got married. They were each other's 'first and only'. All of the sudden her friend gets an STD and goes to the doctor. She was able to piece together that her husband had been cheating on her with someone else and that's how he gave her an STD.

After the nurse was done her story she just glared at the class of supple young men and straight up told us that we should NEVER be allowed to have sex. I think her words were, "Men should never do it. Never."

So in short, men aren't allowed to have sex anymore because one guy was a jerk.

Casual_Username

The blood in the penis during an erection must come out somehow, so when you lose the erection, your penis will bleed. That was one strange teacher.

Planeguy22

The teacher said that a vagina has some kind of tube inside it so that when youre penetrating it, the tube must be inserted into the penis before insemination in order for her to get pregnant.

Yeah, it didnt make sense then either.

BananLarsi

Source.

Answers edited for clarity. 

Pixabay

In life, sometimes there's wrong and "technically not wrong" - and the difference can often be hilarious.

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