Men Share The One Thing A Woman Can Do To Melt Their Heart.


Believe it or not, some times all it takes to melt a man's heart is to compliment him on his appearance, or write him short, sweet notes.

In this article, 29 men share the one thing women can do to melt their heart. [Source can be found at the end of the article]

1. Just a simple touch

On my 16th birthday I quit drinking cold turkey. It wasn't easy, but I was determined. Anyway, I was sitting in the cafeteria at school one day, just trying to keep myself together, and a friend came and sat down beside me. She didn't say anything, didn't ask anything, just played with my hair for a few minutes. It was the first time I'd had human contact without a ton of stress behind it in months.

It was one of those moments that meant nothing to her, she was just being mildly flirtatious and forgot about it basically right away. To me, it may well have been the difference between graduating and moving on with my life's goal, or dropping out and ending up a junky. Those few minutes not only melted my heart, but changed the course of my life.

We went our separate ways after high school, but we ended up at a few mutual friends house parties a year or so later. After that we started to hang out more and more. Long story short, we've been married for almost 13 years now.


2. So sweet!

For me it was when my girlfriend would hug me from behind while I was working on something or just got home, always made me turn around and kiss her.


3. Thanking him without saying a word

When she puts her head on my shoulder or puts her hand on my chest. It's like a quiet way of saying, "thank you for being here right now.


4. The heart melting kiss

In my last relationship, sometimes I'd kiss her and she'd smile halfway through the kiss. Then she'd notice because it kind of broke up the kiss, and she'd go back in with more affection. But the sheer thought that my kiss made her so happy she'd unconsciously smile always melted my heart.


5. Showing genuine concern

A couple years ago, a friend of mine back home had a freak accident and passed away. I continued going to work that week since I couldn't fly out until the weekend. One morning, my coworker just looks at me and asks "How are you doing?"

She and I had been friends already and always used to joke around, but her genuine concern really meant a lot to me during a time I was trying not to show grief.


Continue reading on the next page!

6. For the love of chicken wings!

I remember my wife and I were at Costco. They were sampling chicken wings. My wife doesn't like chicken wings so I was surprised when she walked over to the station with me. I got my chicken wing and she got one and said I know you love wings, here" and gave me an extra wing. What an amazing woman I married.


7. Beautiful

When I'm at a club, I always really appreciate when girls drunkenly pay me compliments, seeing as they're strangers and have no incentives to - It's usually stuff like "Oh I really like your hair" or something like that, but just last night, on my way out of the club, a girl stopped me and told me that I was beautiful.

Not sure about where everyone else is, but where I'm from, "beautiful" isn't really a word that girls just throw around at guys. This was the first thing someone's told me in a long time that's really made me feel good about myself.


8. An affectionate embrace

I crave physical affection, so while it may not seem like something huge to normal people, just giving me really big hugs and being overjoyed to see me and showing that by being close to me is all it takes.


9. Small, romantic gifts

Whenever my girlfriend asks me what I want for holidays, I always say, "just something sweet and meaningful" and she always delivers, and it melts my heart.

One birthday she make us a checklist of like 20 romantic things we can go do that year (picnics, kissing in the rain, etc.), and for another she went online and created a book that told the tale (with illustrations) of our early relationship when we met and fell in love.

Maybe I'm a big sap, but those kinds of things mean more to me than any large extravagant or expensive gift.


10. Back of the head scratch

I was driving with a girl I just started hanging out with romantically a couple days ago and without saying anything she put her hand behind my head and just started scratching my head/rubbing the back of it/putting her fingers through my hair.

I'm a 6' athletic 200 pound combat veteran and I almost squealed with delight. I tried to just maintain a little smile but I probably had the biggest grin on my face.


Continue reading on the next page!

11. Small gestures

Slowly and gently run their nails along my arm. Especially on the palm side up. Then my arm veins really pop up which used to drive her nuts.

There were a few times where I was upset or heated about something, and she would do that and I'd immediately become calm.

Damn I miss her.


12. Thoughtful gifts

My girlfriend is a bit socially awkward and so am I. I don't collect many belongings and feel like taking tons of stuff with you is cluttering your life. So because of that I tend to only buy something I'm positive I know I want and will use and I've researched it enough.

My girlfriend for christmas/birthday (with a few weeks of each other) sent me a puzzle and a cut out of us as Pokemon (I'm Snorlax laid back fat and cuddly, she's Jigglypuff tiny and has a beautiful voice but feisty). I haven't had a real gift aside from gift cards in years. It meant the world to me and I actually teared up because I knew that I had found someone who cared enough to find something I would like.


13. Receive simple compliments

I spend a lot of time finding the right/ appropriate compliments to give women, but I rarely (if ever) get any in return. Tell me that you like my eyes/sense of humor/shoes/knees whatever. It'll stick with me for months.


14. Nobody else but him

I would die if a girl came up to me and just hugged me from behind, and then held my hand as we walked. Or if she would just come over to my house put her head on my shoulder and watch Netflix shows and random movies I want to re-watch and then I would make us something to eat and then have her actually enjoy being with me and nobody else.


15. Just enjoy the moment together

That, sometimes, I don't want to, nor do I care about taking an Instagram picture whenever we go somewhere. Why don't we just enjoy the moment without having to get likes on a stupid app?

My last two girlfriends were obsessed with doing this and it drove me insane. How about we just take a picture of us FOR US, not for everyone else to superficially like.


Continue reading on the next page!

16. Short and sweet compliment

I had just gone through a breakup and was spending irrational amounts of time at the gym. One of my close friends that is a girl said "I know you spend a lot of time at the gym and it's really showing off you look great!" She wasn't flirting with me or anything like that, just a genuinely nice compliment to validate all the hard work I had been putting in.


17. Having a hobby

I am finding in my advanced age (45) that what melts my heart is a girl who is actually interested in something. Some kind of hobby. Something she does for herself that isn't related to eating or drinking or fitness or mothering kids or animals.

Example: I know a girl who is into old cars (has 2 muscle cars and goes to car shows. By herself.) She listens to old records on her couch with the TV off. She enjoys talking about architecture and mid-century furniture. She loves craftsmanship in all forms. I wish she were an ugly disaster so I would have a shot and get get my hands on that sweet sweet brain. Of course she is a former model with long long blonde hair and high self esteem, I'm not in her league, Lord knows I've tried. Friendzone is OK.

But knowing her has helped me understand that someone with actual interests can really melt my heart and that they are out there.


18. Extreme excitement

Not to long ago, my girlfriend came home super excited (like she often is) about her research, and how she had a really awesome something happen with it (I think a paper got published) anyways, so I'm sitting there going through flash cards for school, she comes, sits on my lap, stares at me, kisses me, then continues blabbering on for like 20 minutes about how excited she was. I've seen 5 year olds less excited on Christmas morning. It was pretty cute.


19. The chocolate milk cups

In my shared apartment in undergrad, we would host a lot of people on weekends for drinking. Lots of people would make mixed drinks, and we often needed as many cups as possible. I had a few cups that I used to drink non-alcoholic beverages, and I didn't particularly like when my cups were used for alcoholic drinks, because my chocolate milk, etc. would smell and taste slightly of alcohol for a while after that. But I didn't wanna be "that guy" so I never said anything about it.

One time, a few of my buddies took out my cups to mix drinks in. Again I kept quiet, but a girl in our friend group saw and said "Hey, don't use those! Those are [my name]s chocolate milk cups!"

Despite me never bringing the issue up to anyone, she knew me well enough to know that it bothered me, and spoke up on my behalf. It was such a small and mundane thing, but it was one of the sweetest and most meaningful gestures someone has ever made for me.


Continue reading on the next page!

20. From talking on the phone back to texting

Back in January I had laser eye surgery and during recovery all I could do was lie in my bed all day for a little over a week. I couldn't look at my phone, watch TV or anything like that, I was listening to music throughout the majority of the day. The first day post-op I got a call from a girl (she knew I had surgery and we've been texting/hanging out for a while). We talked for what felt like 5 minutes but in reality it was an hour or so. The next day she called again. And the next. Right until I could use my phone again and we got back to texting. Looking back it brings a smile to my face.


21. Pretty much everything she does

My significant other is long distance, 300-ish miles, which is pretty big for the UK, considering a return train journey is minimum 90. Naturally, we spend a lot of time on Skype, because it's so much better than texting. Usually it's just little comments, something about how my concentration face is cute, my giggle or smile at a YouTube video is nice to see, or my increasing frustration at Rocket League is adorable. Sometimes it's just being able to look up from a 7-4 loss and see her beautiful smile. She does all these little things as well. I told her months ago my favourite colour was red, so recently, she bought a red bra. She usually gets black, but bought a red one solely on the fact it's my favorite color. Tonight she keeps telling me my stubble is cute. What with family and college, I feel bad about what little time I have to spend talking to her, but she's always there, waiting for me. I guess in reality, everything she does melts me heart. She melts all of me.


22. Showing interest in his interest

One time I was in the middle of playing a game on my computer, girlfriend at the time asked if I could teach her how to play, she's never used a mouse and keyboard before to play a game. She comes over and sits on my lap and I guide her hands on what to do and how to play and stuff. She was actually really good and picked up on it fairly quickly. Nothing overly sensual or anything like that, it's just she actually showed genuine interest in something I'm into and she wanted me to introduce her to it and share it with her. First time I ever had a moment like that and I was seriously glowing the rest of the day. Talking about it now even makes me smile.


23. Be more adventurous

My significant other, every now and then, will do something that I'd never expect and I instantly love her times two and am so proud of her, big things like going for a higher position at work or rock climbing to small things. Like the time I dared her to eat a tiny marble sized lemon that we seen growing on a tree at a restaurant and she just picked it peeled it and started chewing. When ever a girl steps out of her comfort zone my heart melts.


24. A meaningful gesture

Had this happen to me recently, sadly didn't work out.

I bought her a drink. She said thank you genuinely. 20 minutes later she came up to me and bought me one AND had remembered what I ordered.

I said thanks. She said, you looked like you needed a beverage you enjoy.


Continue reading on the next page!

25. A pure, innocent act of selflessness

My significant other is not from around here, and she's more used to ethnic food. She knows I like western food a lot, so she made me a fruit salad for desert. With ranch sauce. It was the most adorable thing I have ever seen.


26. Being caring

Do something for me because you care. Anything really because you wanted to make me happy, or if I was having a bad day and wanted to cheer me up. Just anything to remind me that you care about me. I have had a lot of relationships lately where they never gave that to me. Never really made me feel like they cared, that I mattered to them.


27. Cute notes!

My girlfriend wrote a bunch of notes and hid them around my room. They're all really short like 1 sentence, but they say things like "have a nice day" or "you should smile all the time because I love your smile." I keep them all in my nightstand and reread them every so often.


28. Going out of her way to do small things

The one thing that melts my heart is when she does something like clean dust off my shoulders , or pulls a hair or something off my clothes.

Even something as silly as cleaning my glasses for me, cause she noticed a little dust on them.

If I havent asked her and she goes out her way to do these things anyway, it definitely gains her points.


29. Initiating things

Treat me like I'm worth something.

I've dated so many girls who offered me the privilege of a date. I got to pay for dinner. I got to pay for a movie. I had to plan everything and make sure it was fun and thrilling. This was expected of me. If I failed in these areas, I didn't get to see her again.

Later in the relationship, I get to hang out with her. I got to hug her. I got to kiss her. But she would never initiate. I had to be bold and daring and know when the moment was right. If I made a misstep, I was a creep. How dare I?

I wasn't so much a boyfriend or a date as I was just an experience or an accessory. Slight flaws might be forgivable, but I always have to wear that mask. I always have to play that role. If I mess up, I could ruin everything I was made to work for.

If you want to melt my heart, take me out. Buy me dinner. Plan a date that I would like. Risk a first kiss. Discuss things with me. Initiate sex sometimes instead of just dropping hints that it's ok to do it right now. Make me feel like I'm a partner and not a prop.



Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like


My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308


My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango


I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina


With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3



I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold


Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.

I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-


Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.

An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451


Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence


How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster


My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"



It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?


I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)

The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.


Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.

I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.


Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.


Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.



Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.




3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.


Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.


Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.


Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.



My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.



How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).

How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.


Dogs and Chocolate


I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.


Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.


Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.


Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.


Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.


Stars In Their Multitude


I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.



My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.


Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.


Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...


Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.