18 Sex Shop Employees Share The Craziest Experience They Had With A Customer.

Sex shops are fascinating not only for what they hold, but for who they attract. Visitors come from all walks of life - but of course, some are more memorable than others. Here, 18 sex shop employees share the craziest experience they've ever had with a customer.


1/18. One time an old lady came in looking for a big dildo. She asked me how much the red dildo on the wall was... I had to tell her that was the fire extinguisher.

ArturoGJ

2/18. We were open till midnight on the weekends and about fifteen minutes before closing this normal looking woman in a tracksuit comes in with a man on the end of a leash wearing nothing but a diaper. What shocked me more than anything was the dude had sandals with socks on. I told the couple they had to leave because pant were required in order to shop.

RhymesWithPickle

3/18. I went to a very tech-oriented university, and while there I worked at an upscale adult boutique. I was on register and was checking out a middle-aged guy and his wife. They had quite a few purchases so I was making small talk in the meantime, the guy said he had just returned from E3 (video game conference), and I asked some questions related to new games coming out at the time.

He eventually mentioned that he taught game programming at a nearby school, which narrowed it down to 3. I asked him if it was school A or B, the most likely guesses, and he told me it was school A (my school). I simply responded with "cool", but he asked where I attended school, so I told him. Awkward silence after that, the only thing I could think to ask was if they needed batteries for their vibrating nipple clamps (they usually take those annoying watch/disc batteries).

Had him for class about 6 weeks later, I got a pointed stare the first time he took roll, and I believe we came to a silent understanding in those few seconds.

Jellatin

4/18. Dude comes in drunk. We chat for a while and get talking about where he works. Then he grabs product and bolts. Except I knew where he worked. Probably a weird one for him when the popo showed up at his job for stealing dildos.

cheddarben

5/18. When I was nineteen I worked for about three weeks at a rental store that didn't just have a "back room" but a full on sex shop in back that was bigger than the front of the store. If you wanted to rent Dumbo for your kid and buy an assortment of cock rings for yourself we were your one stop shop. One time I had a guy come in to buy an electric vagina, about a $80 item. When I told him to have a nice evening he responded, very enthusiastically, "oh you bet I will."

Three hours later he came back. He wanted to return the electric vagina because the box was missing the lube that was supposed to come with it. Since I'd only been there for about a week and a half I didn't know how to do a return, so I had to use the inter-store phone to call the manager who was working the cash wrap in the front. She asked what was being returned and when I told her it was an electric vagina she said "okay the first thing you need to do is inspect it to make sure it hasn't been used."

"Umm, what?" socially awkward nineteen-year old me said.

"Yes, you have to inspect it to make sure it hasn't been used."

So I had to open up the rubber vagina and inspect it for wear and tear in front of the guy, who was giving me an "are you fucking kidding me?" look. Mercifully, it had not been used and I gave him his refund.

The worst part about it is that I was still a virgin at the time so that was my first close encounter with a vagina. I told this story to a couple of friends of mine too and became known to them as the "electric gynecologist" for a while.

Schnit123


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6/18. I was 19 and worked at this shack looking sex shop. Sketch central of town and if I didn't get free shit and paid to be there I wouldn't be. One evening I'm working with my buddy and I can here him talking to a familiar voice. It was a voice I tried recalling but all I could recall was that it was someone of influence to me. Well I automatically hide thinking it might be my dad and well... it wasn't. It was my youth pastor from church. We locked eyes, my stomach drops, he goes pale and noped the f*ck out.

ColorOfSilence

7/18. A customer came in and she said she never had an orgasm and she was told that some women just never have an orgasm. She didn't buy anything besides condoms and then left. Two days later she comes back in with her boyfriend. The boyfriend is in a big huff yelling, "TELL HER THAT SOME WOMEN JUST DON'T HAVE ORGASMS!" As he was throwing stuff around the room and talking about how his manhood was being insulted and how he was gonna show everyone in the shop how big he is. After he finally left, he peed all over my girlfriend's car.

BigMikeVagStrike

8/18. A woman came in who was very rough looking. I was watching her closely because I thought she might try to steal something. A guy came in and started talking to her. As they were talking, another person came in and asked me a few questions then bought something and left. I looked back over and saw that the guy and the rough looking woman were now having sex in the back corner of the store. I yelled at them and the guy took off and ran out of the store. The woman walked up to the counter, bare naked, and told me that she had met that guy on some phone chat line. She then asked if we had any "loaner" dildos. I told her no and that she needed to get dressed. She just walked out of the store completely naked.

yayalorde

9/18. An old gent came in and wanted to experiment with sex toys as he and his wife's sex life was somewhat dead. I spent a while going through options with him and he seemed happy with his purchases so that was that. A week later an oldish woman came into the shop on my day off to see me to say thank you because their sex life was now incredible. She actually burst into tears while talking to my colleagues because it had made such a difference.

Morg-209

10/18. I grew up in a teensy midwestern town, population of like 900 people. For many years, my mother managed a gas station in a town 20 miles east of my hometown.

For about five years, on Saturdays, the Methodist minister from our town would come to the store and buy two or three porn magazines. We were Lutheran, and my mom was shy and not social, so she had never met the Methodist minister. His visits occurred on a frequent basis until the day my mother had occasion to attend a funeral that happened to have been presided over by the Methodist minister. Their eyes met, and at about the same time she realized who she was looking at, his eyes widened in horror. He stopped coming to the store.

Ten or so years later, my mother transfers to a different location in the chain of stores she worked for, this one in the town 30 miles to the west of the town where we live. It was about the third Saturday after the transfer. The door chimes as it opens, and my mother looks up to greet whomever entered, and there stands the Methodist minister, who immediately recognizes her, freezes, turns on his heel and walks back out. Never saw him again.

Duck-duck--grayduck


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11/18. When I was younger, my mom worked for an Avon-like company that sold sex toys and lube. One day, my mom had to take my sister and I to one of the "parties" she was hosting at a woman's house. We got bored pretty quickly and started walking around the house while my mom explained various devices and products. I was creepily standing in the doorway to the room where the party was occurring, waiting for my mom to turn around so I could ask her if I could have some of the Rotel dip. I was probably 6-7 years old. One of the women sees me and goes bug eyed. My mom asks her what's wrong and she points at me. My mom turns around holding a 3 foot long double headed dildo and screams at me to leave. I did.

Someoneclever

12/18. While not a sex toy shop, I did work for about 6 months at an automotive battery place that was right across the street from one. The number of people who would come in and say something to the effect of "Oh, CAR batteries!" then leave was hilarious at first, then just annoying.

Un_creative_name

13/18. Had video rental rooms with a $20 deposit. Use the Kleenex, don't urinate in the trash can, you'll get your deposit back.

Why we had the urination rule was bizarre to me.

Then I had to tell a guy he wasn't getting his deposit back.

Fozzyp

14/18. I worked a porn movie and sex toy shack for about a year. There were promos for staff to try and sell higher end toys. If you sold a bunch you got a bonus.

We all had different sales tactics... there was one super fancy vibrator I was hyping up. I had one (in the package) at the counter with a note saying "husband replacement unit".

An old dad came in to get a stack of rentals. (thus dating how long ago this was). Pops looked at the sign, took the toy, and placed it on the floor. Arms on his sides looking down at it.

"Well, it doesn't cut the f*cking grass so I still have a job."

Rentals on the house for a month.

Loki_smoke


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15/18. One afternoon I was ringing up a line of customers in the main store.

There were about 4 people in line. The woman I was ringing up and 3 men behind her waiting. She was buying a vibrator. For obvious reasons the shop has a no return policy. Due to this rule we usually will place batteries in the toy and make sure it works before the customer leaves the store, so they know they are getting a working product.

I tell this particular customer that I am going to grab some batteries so we can test the toy for her, and I reach down below the counter to get the box of batteries.

When I stand back up I see her in the middle of dropping her pants and underwear right there on the spot. The 3 guys in line behind her are all staring in amazement. I'm like, "What the hell are you doing lady?"

I can see her looking confused for a moment before asking, "Didn't you say I should test it first?" It then suddenly hits her and she turns bright red before jerking up her pants and running out of the store.

The 3 men are now laughing. The next guy in line asks me, "Did that actually just happen?"

Fizjig

16/18. My buddy managed a sex shop and a guy brought back an inflatable love doll, wanted to return for exchange because he wore it out.

Reddit_spud

17/18. My ex-boyfriend worked the night shift at a chain sex store.

His best story was about a guy who had bought a vibrator the day prior, and came in the next day to complain that it was broken, and that they needed a replacement.

Since store policy is basically once it leaves the store, it's the customers problem, he told the guy that he couldn't do anything for him.

First the guy tried to say that it was sold to him broken, which my ex knew was bullshit because before a device leaves the store, it's tested at the counter to make sure it works (by tested I mean they put batteries in it and turn it on for a few to make sure it buzzes). So the guy admitted that he gave it a try and it worked for a few minutes until it shorted out.

Being a decent person, and also an idiot, he decided to try and figure out why the vibrator broke. So he checks the battery compartment first. Well, where you're supposed to put in two double-A batteries side by side, the guy had crammed a rectangle battery. Anyway. Since the battery was basically the same shape and size as the two double A's would be, it worked long enough for the guy to start having fun, but not finish, and so he insisted that my ex owed him an orgasm, cause it certainly wasn't the customers fault for cramming the wrong battery into the toy.

Priestessofcuddles

18/18. Not employee but customer.

I just turned 18 and went off to college in the big city. I go to the nearest local porn store because they have a huge XXX Arcade sign on the side.

I go in all excited to the back room to try out this XXX arcade.

It was not X-rated mortal combat or Zelda. I was so disappointed. My roommates made fun of me for weeks.

Jjpearson


Source

Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like

Giphy

My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308

Saturdays

My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango

Iraq

I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina

$40

With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3

Crayons

Giphy

I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold

Giphy

Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.


I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-

Tomash

Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.


An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451

Microwaves

Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence

Giphy

How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster

Colorblind

My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"

"orange"

"YOU CANT EVEN KNOW"

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?

Giphy

I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)


The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.

fox_boi2

Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.


I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.

grumblecakes1

Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

Dskee02

Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.

justantherredditgirl

Jewish

Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.

Aslkurloz

Nutella

Giphy

3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.

vault_tec_redditor

Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.

Meh75

Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.

weirdatwork2017

Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.

Frisby2007

Telekinesis

My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.

dude_bizarro

Ghosts

How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).


How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.

thebeststory

Dogs and Chocolate

Giphy

I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.

KlutzyHedgehog

Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.

SFCopperhead

Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.

SirRogers

Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.

MistalQueensglaive

Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.

BugsRatty

Stars In Their Multitude

Giphy

I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.

theedjman

Colorblind

My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

droneb2hive

Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.

moniker5000

Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...

10d4plus8

Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.

ScreamingPotoo