'My Hand Swung Into A Stranger’s Penis.' 26 People Share The Most Awkward Moment They’ve Ever Had With A Stranger.

Ahh the ol' swing your hand into someone's crotch. We've all been there, right? RIGHT?! Here, 26 people share the most awkward moment they've ever had with a stranger.

1/26. I was pooping in a stall while in a local Walmart. A little boy had to use the restroom and he started pulling on the door and said, "Daddy the doors stuck!" and I said, "Somebodys in here!" The little kid kept pulling on the door yelling, "I HAVE TO GO POOOOO!!" Then tried to crawl under the stall. I had to put my foot on the top of his head to stop him from getting in.


2/26. I was riding the train one day, and it lurched to a stop and a woman grabbed my boobs to steady herself. That was awkward.


3/26. One time my friend took her son to the pool - when they were in the change room, a gorgeous athletic tall blonde walks in and my friend told me her toddler could not keep his eyes off of her.

The second this woman undressed and bent over to stick things in her locker, her son took flight from across the room and smacked her butt as hard as his tiny little toddler hands could muster.


4/26. Ended up going to a gas station and filled up my car while this older guy was there doing the same.

We both drove off and ended up at a Starbucks about 2 miles away.

We then both ended up at the gym and ran a few treadmills apart.

We both knew. It was awkward.


5/26. I have a minor social phobia. I was on the bus the other day, and I decided that I want to live my life, goddammit. I wanted to just start a conversation with a stranger, and I didn't know how.

This woman and I were the only two people on the bus. I had this comic in my head, and I figured the best thing I could do was just be honest.

I looked at her and said, "Isn't it funny how we're so afraid to just begin a conversation with another human being?"

She just stared at me.


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6/26. I was at a wedding reception at a golf course once and thought the entire patio was filled with wedding guests. Drunk and hungry, I also thought all the food at the tables were wedding appetizers. Turns out there were regular country club members on the patio as well. Feeling social, I sat at one of the tables, started eating part of their shrimp cocktail appetizer and chatting them up. Unfortunately they weren't part of the wedding, and I was stealing their food. I probably sat there for 10 minutes until I came to the horrible realization of what was happening.


7/26. Without thinking, I once tried to shake an amputee's hand. He stuck out his arm in a non-offended way to show that he was unable to shake my hand, and to diffuse the situation with only minimal amounts of awkwardness. I, for some reason, took this as a gesture to shake his handless arm (it was cut off at just above the elbow so I had to really reach for it) which resulted in uneasy laughs and goodbyes.


8/26. After taking a very stressful French exam during college, I went to the bathroom. All the stress from my life just kind of hit me at once and I started bawling. Several minutes into my nervous breakdown, some dude walks in to find me sitting in the corner near a sink just sobbing. He was so uncomfortable and I could tell. It was so ridiculous that I started laughing uncontrollably like a crazy... the dude just turned around and left.


9/26. I was pooping at the office when someone walks in and tries the stall door, which was locked obviously. The guy proceeds to look over the stall door (he was really tall), and we lock eye contact before he says, "Oh sorry", and I say, "Yo, WTF".


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10/26. I was walking through the shopping mall in my home town, looking at some clothes in the windows. I'm just minding my own business and turn around with a bit of arm-swinging. Well, my arm swung directly into the balls of a complete stranger.

The guy slumped down, moaning in pain. I couldn't even say sorry. I just walked away as innocent looking as I could. I was too embarrassed to say a word


11/26. Freshman in college (I'm a guy), during the first week of classes. I was taking the campus bus as it went down this horribly bumpy hill. Having grown up in the suburbs, I wasn't used to standing on the bus so I lost my balance and fell. Into the lap of this guy. Over and over again, apologizing profusely all the while.


12/26. I was riding my motorcycle a month ago when the light ahead of me turned red. So I slowed down and stopped behind the car that was also waiting at the red light. A guy in sweatpants jogs out between me and the car, and for some reason, a TV remote flies out of his pocket and smashes like it was made of glass, all over the street.

The sheer randomness of a guy having a TV remote in his pocket made me burst out laughing, and the guy was staring at the shards of remote in the street like he didn't know how it got in his pocket. I'm laughing so hard that I ease of my clutch a bit, and scare myself by moving forward an inch, causing me to stall my motorcycle out. I can't stop laughing, and now my motorcycle engine isn't covering the sound. So the guy slowly looks up from the shattered remote and stares directly at me with this pained look on his face. He does this until I stop laughing, fired my bike back up, and drove around him and down the street.


13/26. On the first day of the semester I was walking on campus, and one of my hands kind of swung into this stranger's penis, cupping it for a second. We made eye contact and then quickly walked away from each other. When I get to class, I find out he is my TA. I never went in for extra help. EVER.


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14/26. When I was a kid I liked to extend my arm fully out of the window to feel the wind. On one occasion I was riding with my dad who lived in the city and we were driving down a particularly narrow street with two lanes. As usual, I had my arm hanging out of the window and I ended up SLAPPING an older gentleman right in the face in the car next to us as we drove by. He immediately started shouting at me and I began rolling up the window (non-automatic window) as quickly as my little hands would roll.


15/26. I work in a restaurant, and I was going to greet a customer walking in. Right before he came in, my friend Diane was joking around with me and as he walked in I said very loudly, "I love you!" It got dead silent and he looked at me and just said "....I'm going to sit at the bar.." He proceeded to mean mug me all night.

He was lucky to have my love, if only for a moment.


16/26. I was getting onto an international flight and the flight attendant asked for my passport. I didn't hear him though and I just saw him extending his hand out towards me so I reached out and shook his hand. It was at that moment when I realized what he said to me. He just laughed and tried to save us both from a really awkward moment by saying " Nice to meet you. Do you have your passport?"I apologized and opened up my bag to look for my passport.

I looked behind me and a line of people had started to form so I tried to hurry. I had a newspaper in my hand so I tucked it under my arm. As I started opening up all of the pockets in my backpack trying to find my passport, I dropped my newspaper. I went to pick up the newspaper and as I bent over the contents of my backpack fell onto the floor. I felt so awkward that I was apologizing to other people for subjecting them to my awkwardness. I found my passport, showed the flight attendant, and proceeded to gather up my things. At the end of the flight though the flight attendant shook my hand so I think we're cool.


17/26. I was riding on a crowded bus once in an aisle seat. A woman sat on my arm and stayed there for the next ten minutes.


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18/26. I was overwhelmed with happy one day, because my best friend and I had FINALLY begun dating after two years of liking each other and me being in an awful relationship. I was at the reception desk, I am the receptionist at an office, and my brain was a mushy mess.

The new courier came by to give us mail and grab whatever mail was supposed to go out. I took the mail he handed me, and had the mail to give him on my desk. He asked, "Could I see those?" I, like an idiot, for SOME reason, thought he meant my rings and I showed him my HAND. He looked at me with a confused expression and said, very nicely "Oh, those are nice... can I have the mail?" I died.


19/26. A friend of mine works at Starbucks. During a particularly busy shift, and lacking a couple of staff members who called in sick, a man was shuffling around impatiently waiting for a drink he ordered several minutes ago that he should have already received. My friend, feeling bad for the waiting man, told him, "I'm sorry your drink is taking so long, sir. I'm a bit short-handed today." The man lifts his arm, shows to my friend that all he had was a stump and said, "Me too."


20/26. I ordered pizza online from Dominos and tracked it as it was being made. (If you haven't ordered online before, it tells you by name who is preparing your pizza, etc).

Anyway, it told me "Diego" was on his way to deliver the pizza, so when the delivery man buzzed I opened the door and said a very friendly, "HELLO DIEGO! Thanks for delivering my pizza!!!"

The man (who happened to be of Latin descent) just stood there and looked at me for a minute. Then said, "My name is Luiz."

...I could have tried to explain, but I was really hungry. So I paid the man and ate my pizza.


21/26. I was out at a Walmart picking up a few things back when I was in high school and I ran into a girl I had just started dating a week prior (I was actually about to go over to her house for the first time). She ran up behind me and did a kind of groping hug on me which had surprised me at the time because I wasn't expecting it. She told me she was just about to be leaving after grabbing a few last minute things so I told her I would see her at her house. Well I was walking around the store and I saw her again in the soda aisle so I figured hey I'd do what she did to me.

I went up behind her gave her a hug and groped her all in one motion. It wasn't her, it was her mom. I was out at a Walmart picking up a few things back when I was in High School and I ran into a girl I had just started dating a week prior (I was actually about to go over to her house for the first time). She ran up behind me and did a kind of groping hug on me which had surprised me at the time because well I wasn't expecting. She told me she was just about to be leaving after grabbing a few last minute things so I told her I would see her at her house. Well I was walking around the store and I saw her again in the soda aisle in the back so I figured hey I'd do what she did to me. I went up behind her gave her a hug and groped her all in one motion. It wasn't her, it was her mom.


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22/26. When I was 13, I was at the local convenience store with friends in the middle of winter. We all decided to get some frothy cappuccinos to warm our spirits. I decided on the French Vanilla, while my other friend went for an English Toffee. We paid while our other friends were perusing other items and started walking towards the door, with me walking in front. As I approached the door, I took the cap off my frothy beverage, smelled it, and turned back to my friend with my eyes closed while giving an over-the-top and obnoxious "mmmmmmmm" sound.

When I opened my eyes, I realized it wasn't my friend but an extremely unimpressed middle aged woman with glasses. We stared at each other for at least five seconds, me rooted to the spot in shock, and her judging me. She then moved past me and left.


23/26. I once walked into a restaurant- I went straight to the bathroom, past the people who I now realize were waiting in line. I flung open the bathroom door AS WIDE AS FREAKING POSSIBLE and saw a girl on the toilet. We looked at each other wide-eyed until I final screamed, "WELL, THIS IS AWKWARD!!!" loud enough for the entire restaurant to turn and look.

Embarrassed, I ran as fast as I could, leaving the door wide open open. The worst part? It was the type of door that closed itself ever so slowly, leaving the wide-eyed girl awkwardly sitting on the toilet with everyone staring at her.


24/26. Saw my friends Meg and Brandon walking down the street toward me. I was excited to see them so I ran toward them and yelled, "What's up, LOSERS??"It wasn't them.


25/26. When I was little boy (about 6 or 7), I was in a single bathroom at Panera Bread when suddenly this guy just walked in and started pooping. I was too scared to say anything so I just stared at him. Was very awkward when he casually looked over to see me cowering in the corner.


26/26. The outdoor stairs at my work froze over and some guy needed to get up the stairs while I was at the top of them. I grabbed his hand (not that bad), but halfway up the stairs he mysteriously interlocked his fingers in mine. I should have just let go...



"It wasn't me!"

There's not much you can do when the righteous fist of the law comes down on you. Call it a mix-up, or call it a mistake, if someone's pegged you at the scene of a crime there's not much you can do but trust the justice system to prove you innocent. However, that's a gamble, and just because you've been given a "not guilty" doesn't mean the effects won't follow you for the rest of your life.

Reddit user, u/danbrownskin, wanted to hear about the times when it wasn't you, seriously, it was someone else, when they asked:

Redditors who were once considered suspect of a crime they did not commit, what's it like being held under suspicion and how did it affect your life?

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