People Reveal Why They Take Forever To Text Their Friends Back—And We're Scratching Our Heads
"I'm on my phone to turn my brain off."
Most everyone walks around with a powerful super computer in their pockets. In less than a few seconds, we have the knowledge of the world at our fingertips. If you wanted, and with enough effort, you could find that obscure commercial from the mid-90s with the catchy jingle you just can't get out of your head. So explain why it takes so long to just text back, "Yes," when I need to know if we're still meeting for lunch???
Sometimes, people are slow responding to texts.
Reddit user, u/troycj, wanted to know the true reason why people take their time getting back to others when they asked:
People who are always on their phone but decide to reply to a text hours later, why?
Because if I respond that initiates a conversation I might not be in the mood for.
this for sure. and even if i'm on other social media that usually takes a lot less mental effort than an actual conversation.
Sometimes responding to the message takes a lot more effort than scrolling a random app.
Also sometimes just feel like being introverted and reading random things on my phone without actually talking to anyone. Also if it is a text where the response has some kind of surrounding awkwardness or subsequent repercussions, I'll take longer to respond
I want to give the text the attention it deserves, but most if the time I'm on my phone to turn my brain off.
So I tell myself that I'll respond when I can dedicate the appropriate response, but then I forget and the notification has gone away.
Because, Shiny Thing...
I looked at it, I decided to think about my answer for a few minutes, then I got distracted
Because, Wait, I Thought I Responded Already...
I usually respond to the text in my head without actually responding, this has gotten me in a lot of trouble before lol
Exactly this. And then I get bored to write the answer down
Or I'm too busy
My brain is currently going through a million variations of horrible things that the text meant, and how I'm a horrible person. It takes time to talk yourself out of that to get to be able to reply to something normally
Because, Just Call Me...
I get around to a text when I get around to a text.
I view texting in general as low-priority communication. If it was really important, they would have called.
Because, Stuff's In Front Of Me...
Normally I'm doing something and I see the text and be like 'Oh I'll respond to it after this' then I forget until hours later
Because, Kids Today And Their Hootin' Tootin' Technology...
In the olden days you would send someone some mail.
You weren't expected to immediately answer or even to read it. Same with email today. I treat texts the same way. I'll respond when I feel like it barring there is no time sensitive reason for me to respond immediately.
I don't want people to think that I'm accessible 24/7. Don't want people texting you after 9pm? Don't respond to any texts after 9pm. Don't want people bothering you while you're working? Don't respond during work hours. My wife is the only person in earth that I text back immediately. Everyone else can wait.
Because, It's Not Me, It's You...
Honestly, I text hours later because that individual annoys me and I need to mentally prepare for the inevitable conversation that will cause me to consider hurting myself.
Because, Thumb Energy...?
I don't want to use up my thumb energy.
Because, The Internet...
I'm too busy arguing with strangers on the internet to give attention to the people I actually know.
Because, I'm Going To Beat This Level Even If It Kills Me...
If I'm on my phone, I'm probably playing games or whatever.
I don't feel like having a conversation.
Family and best friends will get a reply from me in less than 2 minutes.
Work will get a replay in 4 to 10 minutes.
Friends and everyone else will get a reply from me in 20 minutes to 3 days time.
Because, Guys, Think About It...
Because texts are non-realtime, like letters.
So they give you the opportunity to think, AND to respond at the time that suits you best.
Usually it initiates more conversation or an invitation. I often leave it till later when I am in a place to answer it because of anxiety. It has nothing to do if I like the person and more about what state im in. People have more ease into your day to day life through passive text.
A lot of people think they should be answered within a few minutes but if you're not in the mood then why? Why drag someone through your mood or make yourself look like you're okay when all you want to do is relax your mind and not overthink every little thing.
Talk to them later when you feel better. I hate those "read" notifications because it makes you look like a butt for not replying in the moment. When in reality you were checking to see if all was okay and if it's casual then answer when you've gotten personal time done with.
Dozens of reasons. I'm walking/driving and cant respond properly. I'm with company and don't want to have a back and forth on my phone during. I'm working, playing games, writing, playing sports, or something that draws my full attention away from the phone but allows me to check messages and such real quick. I'm baked and don't really feel like responding. Or simply, I don't feel like talking to the person texting right this minute and maybe later I will.
There are literally hundreds of reasons. I don't think anyone should think too deeply into unresponded messages like society tends to do. Don't over think it, sometimes people are just doing other shit. If you want an immediate response, just call?
I like to show people that they are not important to me
The way I view it, a text is not a summons.
Just because one has the the capability to reach me anytime they want does not mean I am always in the mood to be reached, or required to be available to them at every given moment.
Unless it is an urgent text, I view it as a voicemail and I will get back to them when I get back to them.
So true! Just because we put 20+ devices into one now, doesn't mean I have to be constantly available for anyone who just decides to text me. I deserve to have me time, and if I wanna do it on my phone I can. And I always make a point to respond within 24 hrs at the very latest, and expect others to do the same. Usually it's no more than a few hours, like when I'm at work, or if you text me when I'm already asleep and don't see it until the morning it's already been a while so, might as well take my time.
Are you good at holding up a conversation over text? Let us know why!
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