People Reveal The Most Satisfying Times They Caught Someone In A Lie

"You LIAR!"

You can feel it in your gut. It's a small, nagging tug that never lets go. You repeatedly think, "This dude's straight up lying to me. I just know it." Then, BOOM! You see your opportunity to catch them, expose them, and put them on full blast. Nothing has ever been that satisfying before and nothing will be that satisfying ever again. A Reddit user wanted to know about those glorious times when they asked:

What was the most satisfying time where you caught someone lying?

Silence Is The Best Policy

I travel for work. I 90% of the time park in economy at the airport (I think $14 per day). about a 10 to 15 min walk. A few times out of necessity to catch a flight I park in the garage (I think $24 per day, 5 min walk). Usually 2 to 3 day trips, not a huge expense.

My boss suggests I park in Off Site Shuttle parking (about $11 a day, but a pain in the a-- as you need a bunch more time to plan for the shuttle). He said he does it, because it is cheaper for the company (which he owns).

One day while walking through the garage from on site economy, there in the reserved parking (closest and like $40 per day) is my boss's truck. And reserved takes planning, he wasn't just running late and needed to park in the garage to make a flight.

I just put my business card under his wiper. I never brought it up, and I haven't heard any complaints about parking on my expense reports since.


Set The Trap

A co-worker was a military retiree who claimed to have been everywhere.

Someone might say, "I spent a week in Cambodia..."

He'd say, "Yeah, I was there once. Stopped over on my way to Thailand."

We figured he was bullsh-tting most if not all the time, so we started inventing places. "My cousin is traveling in Argentina, and he's at this mountain village called Burritosalsa...."

HIM: "Oh, yeah. We did a joint military exercise with Argentina back in the 80s and stopped off there."

US: "Did you visit the temple on Blueberry Hill?"

HIM: "Hell, yeah! Everyone in my outfit visited!"

Total bullsh-tter.


Photographic Proof

When I lived with my Dad I had a cash bank that I kept hidden. I was positive about the sum of money I had saved up (I was saving up for the Xbox One Xbox 360 which was coming out) and when I counted it, it was short. Like $20 short. I also had a webcam on my computer and since my family was not computer literate I set it up on a timelapse, one picture every 10 seconds, whenever I left the house. Sure enough, suspected family member went into my room, went right for the stash and stole from me. I confronted them at dinner in front of everyone, they denied it, others believed them, and then I put the photo I printed out on the table.

Best macaroni and cheese I ever ate.


Key To Poker? Learn To Count.

Someone put down 2 sevens, but I had all four of them


Adamantly Wrong On Camera

Guest lied to me that he paid for two nights and wouldn't leave the room.

Made me go through this giant ordeal of calling all the front desk employees and double check all their work. He threw a huge fit. He jets out of the parking lot and the police take him in.

Coworkers and I still play it on the camera and laugh about it.


Don't Change A Thing

Before desktop publishing, I was in my 20s, an ad designer for a local department store. The boss was out, and a co-worker (who had been there many years, and was jaded and grumpy all the time) was put in charge for the day. I brought an ad to her for approval, and she found some nit-picky thing that she wanted adjusted.

I knew that it was just bullsh-t on her part, so she could feel powerful. I took the ad back to my desk, worked on something else for a while, then brought it back absolutely unchanged. She looked at it and said "Oh, that looks much better!", and approved it.

I never let on that it was the exactly same version she'd rejected earlier.


Let Them Catch Themselves

That happened with my previous boss.

I'd sent him a deck that we were going to present the next day, and he nit-picked the hell out of it. We were on a business trip, just got off a really long flight, and I didn't want to fight it even though I knew his revisions were bull. I revised the file and sent it over. Unbeknownst to me, in my sleep-deprived state I had sent the unrevised file again. He checked it and went "See, isn't this so much clearer?" while pointing out the parts that he thought I had changed. I realized when I saw it that it was the old file, but I let him keep talking for a few minutes until he checked another slide and saw it unchanged, and he realized that the file was unrevised.

I hated working for him, and that was pretty much the only revenge I ever got so it felt great.


Hijacker Barbie!

I must have been nine or ten. My friends and I were all going through the same doll phase, so we would bring our favorites to each other's house and play.

As my friend was leaving I noticed a few of my dolls missing. She was holding them hostage in her doll limo, I just knew it. As she was walking outside I casually said, "oh I think you might have grabbed my doll on accident." Flustered she checked her limo and pulled out my dolls.

Got you.

She also stole some of my dolls clothing. I searched her room when she went to bathroom and stole it back.

Stopped playing dolls with her!


When The Power Is Sooo Great

I dated this guy off and on for about a year. Things didn't always add up but I was young and dumb and made excuses. During that year his mom passed away from pancreatic cancer, he relapsed and then went to rehab, and after he got out he moved a few states away for a fresh start near where his grandparents lived. We decided we were done at that point but he still emailed occasionally and a couple times he'd randomly show up on my doorstep saying he was in town and needed to see me.

After one such surprise visit I emailed him and said that I couldn't keep doing this and to please not come by anymore. A year or so passed and I got a bug up my butt one night to google him. And found a baby registry with his name on it. Looked up the baby mama on Facebook and found pictures of them together living together just a few hours away and during the time that he and I were dating. I was able to determine that when we first started seeing each other they weren't together, but when he was supposedly in California and missed me so much and didn't want to be with anyone else he was actually just a few hours away with her. The kicker - his mom was still alive too. It became clear to me that he was a pathological liar and I'd basically fallen in love with someone that didn't really exist.

Here's the satisfying part - literally the next day he showed up on my doorstep. The first thing I said is "Where's W (baby mama)? Does she know you're here?" His face dropped, he started stammering making excuses that I didn't know what was really going on. He even insisted that his mom was dead. I felt like I was in a girl power movie moment as I told him to get the f-ck off my porch and never come see me again.


Spotting Someone Out In The World

Once had a person work for me who would always call out and use her past health problems as a crutch to miss work all the time. One Monday she called in, gave me some generic illness excuse and said she couldn't get out of bed.

That morning another department had a breakfast meeting at ihop (ihob) and saw her there eating breakfast with her friends looking like she was in perfect health. The picture evidence sent to me was oh so satisfying.


Eat It, Eloise!

Okay this is super petty, but when I was 7 my friend Eloise thought she was the queen of the animal kingdom. She knew everything about every animal ever, acting likes she's been watching animal planet since the day her mum popped her out. I always kind of thought she must be lying about her nature knowledge, I mean she knew WAY too much. So one day we're in the playground and she's poking at the ground trying to find beetles or something, whilst prattling off a long list of species.

Then I just say "oh hey! What do you know about the insert made up beetle name I pulled out my arse?".

And then she goes on and on about how much she loves that species and all these "facts" about their diet and habitat. I just kind of let her get on with it for a while before breaking it to her that she had just been pretending to know about a made up beetle for the last five minutes. She just started stuttering and looking down at her feet and then eventually just changed the subject.

It felt so good to finally expose her, her nature knowledge was a fat sham the whole time. Take that Eloise.


Don't. Mess. With. The. Library.

I'm a librarian and I'm actually very proud of this one. Back then I was in charge of the cinema and music section of my library. This guy came with his son and asked me where to find our Puff Daddy CDs. We have one and I show him on the shelves where to find it. Then I was called in another place of the library and go check on my colleagues. On my way back to the music section, I see him coming out of the library and I don't know why (maybe he seemed dodgy) but I have a feeling something is wrong. I go check, the CD is gone. It's not appearing on his library card, so he didn't borrow it. I have a look if he didn't misplace it but it's not there. The guy just stole the f-cking Puff Daddy CD, WITH HIS 8 YEARS OLD SON. FROM A PUBLIC LIBRARY. WHERE YOU CAN BORROW IT FOR FREE. At this point I do nothing because we have no proof, and no security camera. A few weeks later, the son and his sister (8 and 10 years old) come to the library again and borrow some CD. I'm watching them and to my knowledge, they didn't steal anything, and I don't want to confront them because it would break my heart to have them stopping to come to the library because of their father.

But this whole story still bother me. So a few month later, I decide to try something. I still had the stolen CD barcode and I just decided to add it to their library card, as if they borrowed it. Worst case scenario, they say they don't have it and I apologise and say that it's a mistake from the library. A few days later they arrive, take some documents, return some, and just before leaving I proceed to explain them that they still have a document, a "Puff Daddy CD" that they need to return. The look of panic in their eyes and incomprehension was just delightful. They didn't say anything and a few days later they came back with the CD. I don't really care about Puff Daddy, and we could easily have replaced it, but just for the principle, it was one of my greatest victories.


When You Carry The Evidence With You

Ex girlfriend told me she was going to a "girls only" pool party with some of her fellow waitresses from the restaurant she worked at.

I had felt something weird going on for a bit and had put a lot of effort into making that night a surprise "date night". I worked that morning, while she worked in the evening. While she was at work I cleaned the whole apartment (that we shared), cooked a fancy surf and turf dinner with filet mignon, lobster tails, butter pasta, expensive wine, etc. Also rented a few movies I knew she would like. So when after dinner she suddenly told me she was going to this pool party at around 10 pm and I couldn't come I was pretty exasperated and knew something was not right.

Noticed she was putting her phone face down every time she received a text about this party. While she is putting on her sexiest bikini to wear under her clothes on her way over to this party I decide to look at the phone and it's some dude from her work (under the name Angela in her phone), telling her he can't wait to see her, can't stop thinking about the other night, etc. Scroll down a bit and they even said they loved each other. There's not really a worse feeling in the world when you are in love with someone and they do that to you...



My brother is in a stage where hes being super dirty and smelly and not taking showers.

This one time i bought him a deodorant. I started seing it in the same place for a couple days.. then weeks, IN THE SAME PLACE, not moving an inch.

So i opened it and placed a paper inside in a way that if you opened the thing it would fall. A month later one of those days when his smell was super gross i ask him if he has been using it and he says yeah of course. I opened the thing and there it was the paper!!!!!


Lyin' Parents, Lyin' Kids

I work at a daycare. If a child is sick they will be sent home cause we don't want to risk infecting the whole class (generally happens anyway).

A lot parents don't agree with this policy which leads to parents arguing with us that their kid isn't sick when they obviously are.

My favorite time this happen was when a mother dropped her little boy off in an eye patch. Yep the toddler was wearing a d-mn eye patch. I ask what happened and she says he hit his eye or something. Which I didn't really believe.

She says whatever I do don't take off his eye patch. I pick him up and immediately lift up his eye patch.... pink eye. She was sooooo pissed at me for doing that. And she was shocked I did it.

The look on her face was so satisfying. Although I got yelled at by my supervisor for it.


You're Not Going ANYWHERE

A friend of mine was just starting a long road trip to drop his girlfriend off after a trip (6+ hours) and they stopped at a gas station at the start where she ran in to get some snacks and use the restroom but left her phone there.

Up pops a text message from a guy saying something like "You back from your trip yet babe?"

She comes back and he had enough time to compose himself to calmly ask her question after question slowly circling closer to the point where she realizes the jig is up and then he gets to go off on her as she tearfully admits to everything over the next several hours.

I never want to be cheated on, but if I ever had been I wouldn't be opposed to them being a captive audience for several hours.



Oohhh boy.

So in college I had this friend who was a very good pole vaulter. Seriously, one of the top in the state for his division. This was back in 2008. He tells ALL of his family, and friends, and even his boss that he was recruited to compete in the Beijing olymipcs. Well his close friends, including myself already call bullsh-t but when the "day" comes he is nowhere to be found. In fact, we didnt see him for a couple of days, and he started texting pics from Beijing. So we were doubting ourselves a bit.

Then we were driving along the freeway, and guess whos broken down on the side of the road like 2 days after he left? Mr Olympian! When we pulled over the look on his face was priceless. He stood by his story too, and said because of the time difference he already went and came back.

I still dont know what he had to gain from such an elaborate bullsh-t story.


Catching The Lie When It's YOUR Story

At work one day a co-worker started telling me and another co-worker a story about being stopped by the police.

He went into great detail about how he stopped at a gas station for a drink and there were two cops standing out front and nobody else in the parking lot. He gave the cops a wave, being nice, bought his drink, and left. Less than a hundred feet down the street these same two cops pulled him over. They told him that they smelled weed when he got out of the car. He asked the cops if they could smell it now, standing next to his open window, they said no but it was obvious it came from him. They asked if they could search his car, which he angrily let them, telling them he wanted the cops to climb through his hot car to find nothing. While one cop did the "Search" the other cop told him to calm down, he looked nervous. To which he said "I'm not pissed, I'm angry. You didn't smell weed, you smelled a shaved head and tattoos." The cops found nothing and let him go about his business.


It was MY story. It happened to ME months before and I told that story at work back then. He even quoted me, except I said "Long hair and tattoos". A few minutes into the story my other co-worker and I start giving each other the side eye, realizing he was literally telling me my own story. I think he realized it towards the end because he quickly finished up the story and left without ever mentioning it again.

We never brought it up either, I had such a bad case of second hand embarrassment for the guy. Plus everybody else already heard about it and he was forever branded the liar.


When Note-Taking Saves The Day!

I had a boss who kept on getting angry at me because, "I wasn't doing what he told me to do."

Finally one day, I decided to start writing down exactly what he told me, dated it, and kept record of it.

Then one day came where inevitably, "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!"

"Exactly what you told me to do."


"Well, I have it written here..." pulls out note card "On 5/22/16 -- you told me specifically to do this task, exactly like this, and never do it any other way."

I finally won. I started standing up for myself a bit more in the office, and I was respected for it.


When You Lie About Cancer...Just, Give It Up

I was 16 and was seeing a girl who I had some doubts about. She would make up the most insignificant lies about stupid sh-t but it wasn't malicious so I let it slide, until things escalated.

Her dad had a friend (John) who had cancer. We went to visit him 200 miles away and he looked really bad, she acted like she didn't give a sh-t. About 2 weeks later we were at a party and she started crying about how John had died and she was absolutely devastated so I comforted her.

About a week after that I went to dinner at her parents and her dad said "I just got off of the phone with John and they're saying he's reacting well with the chemo" Her face dropped, and she couldn't look me in the eye, but I knew I had her, so I finished my dinner and went home. I phoned her later and told her not to call me ever again or I'll tell her dad about her lie. She didn't call again.

I still don't know what happened to poor John


H/T: Reddit

Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like


My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308


My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango


I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina


With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3



I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold


Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.

I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-


Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.

An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451


Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence


How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster


My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"



It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?


I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)

The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.


Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.

I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.


Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.


Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.



Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.




3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.


Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.


Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.


Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.



My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.



How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).

How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.


Dogs and Chocolate


I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.


Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.


Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.


Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.


Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.


Stars In Their Multitude


I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.



My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.


Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.


Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...


Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.