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People Reveal The Time They've Suffered The Worst Case Of Second Hand Embarrassment

Oh for shame...

Life is a gamble. In this day and age you have no idea what will be the effects of what falls out of your mouth. Most of the time we aren't clued in to anyone else's existence. So when the time comes we stick our proverbial "foot" in our mouths, it can be a bit... embarrassing. Most of the time it's done with no ill will but that can't take away the regret and self-induced shame.


Redditor slicketyslack wanted everyone to admit... What was the most genuinely awkward situation that you've ever witnessed or experienced?

Sober up before you speak...

Not my story but a family friend.

He's a school principal, and he goes to a wine festival and on his way home (slightly drunk) on the train he runs into the parents of a boy he used to teach. They get to talking this and that when my family friends asks how the boy is... The parents just look shocked and say "he passed away last year... you were at the funeral... you spoke." He apologized profusely, but I think that's the most awkward story I've ever heard.

niwawhatuira

Always carry a compass...

I was visiting my girlfriend (now wife) in college one weekend. We went to a party and I ended up having WAY too much to drink and blacked out. We get back to her dorm room and both fall asleep (I'm definitely in her room next to her at this point).

I wake up on the floor with a bunch of blankets on me and a trash can next to my head. Must have been getting sick? I stand up to crawl back in bed to my girlfriend, but there is a woman with different color hair in her bed, and the sheets are different, and the shit on the walls is different too. That's when I panic and sprint out of the room, but I'm still super drunk and I tripped on the blankets on the floor and fall flat on my face. I walk out into the hallway with a bloody nose and I'm out of breath. Girlfriends room is right across the hall.

I walk in and she is sitting on the bed pissed. Apparently I got up to pee an hour earlier and never came back. She went looking for me and couldn't find me. She talked to the girls across the hall the next day and apologized on my behalf. They both apparently just laughed and said it was fine.

Their account (according to my wife): I just barged in the room complaining about something when I sat on the bed and realized that person wasn't my girlfriend. I apologized to them and said I was lost and that the best thing to do when you're lost is to stay put. So I sat on the floor waiting for my girlfriend to come find me, fell asleep, and they put blankets on me. Didn't get sick, but they weren't taking chances.

BruceWaynesTARDIS

I'll take mine caliente...

In college I lived really close to my grandparent's house so they gave me a key and told me to "Stop on by anytime, don't worry about calling." So I did. My grandma was giving my grandpa a bj in the living room. I ALWAYS call now. It's been 10 years. My grandma's favorite marriage advice is to "keep it spicy." More power to them I guess but I'll never get that image out of my head.

The first time hanging out with my little brother after I broke his arm. Yikes...

jasonpeterwaterfalls

The rooms are alive with the Sound of... ;)

Went into my girlfriend's dorm to chill. We saw that her roommate was fully under her covers probably watching some TV show, so we said "hi" and laid down and chat for a bit.

She probably had her headphones on really loud or something because then we hear a vibrating sound while we were talking.

Neither of us address it and just go "ah ha ha, what's that sound?" After 10 minutes or so it gets heavier and it looks like she's moving under the covers. Then we addressed it to each other and decided rather than letting her know loud and clear that we're in the room, we just slowly and quietly left.

cjog210

I was working as a bank teller. My allergies were going nuts. In fact everyone was. We all came into work eyes red and sneezing. Apparently the pollen count was at a record breaking high. Anyways we opened up and I help the first customer of the day. It went something like this.

Me: "Hi, how are you doing today?"

Her: "I'm actually not feeling so good."

Me: "oh, I'm sorry. Is it your allergies? I know me and my coworkers are feeling it pretty bad."

Her: "no, I had a miscarriage this morning."

Me: "........I'm sorry."

This was all through the drive through. I feel bad, I wish I could have comforted her a little bit, but I had no idea what to say.

Skippy_the_Hippi

30 is a killer!

Oh boy, oh boy do I have a story. My cousin was turning 30, so we were all(uncles, cousins etc, about 30 people) meeting at my grand parents house to celebrate and cut cake. An hour or two before we all made our way there, some of us coming from that far away, my grandfather had a heart attack. Before I got there, EMTS had come and gone and grandpa was pronounced dead. While waiting for the funeral home to come and collect the body, we all crowded around and left offerings/said prayers (traditional in my culture) and it was all very somber. My 30 year old cousin's mum (eldest daughter of the deceased), however, has some problems with narcissism, so while we're all praying she insists that we must still cut her daughters cake and sing happy birthday. She set up a stool to hold the cake OVER MY GRANDFATHER'S CORPSE and made her protesting daughter cut the cake right there while we all sit around the body and cake singing happy birthday through barely contained tears. They used this big butcher knife too and the whole time all I could imagine was somebody slipping and impaling grandpa. Honestly the absurdity of it all kind of distracted from the sting of grieving, so all in all it kind of worked out alright.

5Volt

We All Cry For Icecream

Teenage me didn't have a car yet. I went to go ask my mom if I could take it to go get ice cream with my sister. Got to my mom's room and she was crying really hard. Her best friend's son who was my age and I had been familiar with growing up had just committed suicide by stepping in front of a train. I don't know how I could've been that heartless, but I still asked to go get ice cream.

Meraxes26

I laugh uncontrollably....

I was at a Starbucks on my commute, waiting for my drink and people watching. I watched a young mother and her toddler, clearly just started standing holding onto the back of the chair, and had this silent moment of being charmed by them. The mother took her foot off the bottom rung and stood up to get a stir stick and WHAP, the child went slamming face first into the floor.

There was a moment of silence and then SCREAMING. There was a splatter of blood, panic, the mother screaming for an ambulance.

And I.. started laughing??????????????? It was completely uncontrollable. I wasn't finding anything funny, I was completely horrified and yet I couldn't stop flat out guffawing. I was covering my mouth, hysterically laughing this throaty laugh nearly in this woman's face. I couldn't keep it down, my face was in a horrified expression but it just kept happening. The tension in that room before I left - easily the most awkward experience of my life. I have no idea what the heck happened.

awallpapergirl

Ashes to ashes... wife to wife?

Attended a memorial/funeral in Japan for an American sailor. His wife was there, and his ex-wife was there also, and his Japanese "wife" was there as well. It was rumored that there was also another girlfriend but if there was, she didn't show. The best part was the poor dude giving the eulogy talking about what a great person this guy was while these three women are giving each other the stink eye.

GabbyJohnsonWasRight

REDDIT

Leaving a mark...

Apologizing to my SO's father in person for sucking on his daughter's neck and leaving a hickey wasn't exactly the coolest moment I've experienced in my life.

_Than0s

Scooby, Scooby-Doo where are you?

One Halloween I was walking with a group of friends to one friend's apartment. I don't remember how it happened, but they got a little ahead of me. I figured it was no big deal, we were entering the apartment complex and I had been to their apartment before.

So I get to the apartment door and knock. Nobody answered, but I knew they were expecting me any second so I just opened the door and went in. There was nobody in the living room, so I headed to the kitchen, where I scared the crap out of some guy I'd never seen before. I turned around and ran out of his apartment, apologizing all the way.

He followed me out a bit slower and asked me what had happened. I explained, and he said he didn't know my friends, but was just moving in. And that's the story of how I barged into a stranger's apartment dressed like Velma from Scooby Doo. I texted my friends and found they had moved to a larger apartment within the complex recently, and failed to mention it.

shinymathom

I would go to a 2nd language tutor once a week & she was married to a cop. One day I arrived for my session & it was very clear that they were in the middle of an argument & she had been crying but urged me inside anyways & started going over the lesson. He then walked into the room, stood over me & told me to leave whilst she told me to stay. They then started arguing over me. It was very, very uncomfortable.

I left & that was the last time I went there. To be completely honest I have often thought back & wondered if I should have said something to someone... but to who? And what..? That something 'felt' off? I've been curious if they stayed together or if they broke up.

Leannderthal1976

Where there is smoke...

When I was 11, my family had a BBQ & they invited some friends who had kids that imo were "super cute." I was a hot mess of a tomboy so I high tailed into the shower thinking I had time before they arrived... boy, was I wrong.

I got out of the shower in my towel to hear the boys already serving their plates. I quickly go into my room. Now this room didn't have a lock & my room was the unspoken-designated kids room to eat in & play, I hear their footsteps coming closer & I duck into closet. I'm in a towel, hair frizzy, water dripping on to closet floor...I hear the boys sit on the bed, turn on tv & eat delicious BBQ.

Then, I guess, my mom & aunt notice I'm not there & that's not possible since I love food I shoulda been first with my greedy butt. Search begins...The boys don't even bother to leave when their mom came in to tell them to help find me...instead they open closet door to find me. (Now I assume it was a sarcastic attempt in searching lol) I panicked when they reached the closet and pretended I was asleep...they shook me to 'wake' me up and told everyone I was asleep in a towel in the closet. Commence house wide laughter, even the boys were laughing!! I still feel the awkwardness and that was like 30 years ago haha.

Sofybunny

Mommie Dearest... oops.

I was on a road trip (passenger) and sexting with my girlfriend. During the steamy conversation I got a text saying "Please stop somewhere and get some sleep tonight, don't try to do the whole trip in one day." I assumed it was another text from my girlfriend, so I replied "well judging from how horny you made me, I don't know if I'll be able to sleep." It was my mom.

Phil_Drill

Too many feelings...

A group of three ladies that I recognized as regular customers were shopping. Three of the ladies are sisters but there is a significant age gap between oldest and youngest, maybe 10-15 years. The youngest sister was carrying her newborn who was a bit fussy, and at various points, she would hand the baby off to the oldest sister.

My newish coworker came up to chat with/help them and to fuss over the baby. Not knowing these women, she assumed that the oldest sister who was helping with the baby was actually the baby's grandmother (rather than aunt) and commented good-naturedly on how sometimes babies just want their grandmas and grandmas know best sometimes.

This was, of course, the exact wrong thing to say because:

  1. Oldest sister was of course dismayed at being an aunt being mistaken for a grandma
  2. All three sisters were shopping for something for the youngest sister (who was still adjusting to her post-pregnancy body) to wear to their mother's funeral. The baby would never see their grandma and here's this saleslady waxing on about how important grandmas are.

The three sisters burst into tears which of course set the baby off as well, which caused everyone around to stare. They were still staring when the middle sister (not being flooded with post partum hormones or the adrenaline that comes from being mistaken for your sister's mom) eventually was able to explain the situation to my very alarmed and horrified coworker.

Cheerful-Litigant

Went up behind someone thinking they were my sister, and asked, "Hey how much money do you have?"

She turned around, and it was not my sister. I just walked away saying sorry.

_ZeroRoy_

On the way to a conference on the train. Nature called, so off I went to the on-board toilet. Hit the open button, door starts it's long, slow opening and greeted with the screams of a woman in full pants down squat who forgot to lock the door. Being British, I apologize, hit the close button and wait outside, avoiding eye contact when the woman exits.

Fast forward 2 hours, I am front row for one of the conference talks and who should take the stage? Yup.

Is it a boy or a girl?

On a plane flight there was a guy across the aisle from me, and a pretty large woman sitting behind him. After the flight the two of them were standing in the aisle waiting for the door to open, and he turned around to her and said, "This would be a terrible time to have that baby!" Hardy har har. I already knew, but the look on her face confirmed that she was not pregnant.

Scrappy_Larue

Safety first...

Back in high school, buddy of mine was buying lube and some other stuff at Walmart but not condoms. He got all trigger shy and didn't wanna get rung out with it all so I said I'd do it. As the cashier is scanning items she looks at me and goes "huh you're getting all this, but where are the condoms?" With as straight of a face as I could I said, "he can't get pregnant." while gesturing to my buddy. She looked so uncomfortable she didn't say another word while ringing everything up.

Daddy4444

REDDIT

Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like

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My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308

Saturdays

My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango

Iraq

I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina

$40

With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3

Crayons

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I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold

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Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.


I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-

Tomash

Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.


An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451

Microwaves

Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence

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How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster

Colorblind

My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"

"orange"

"YOU CANT EVEN KNOW"

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?

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I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)


The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.

fox_boi2

Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.


I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.

grumblecakes1

Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

Dskee02

Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.

justantherredditgirl

Jewish

Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.

Aslkurloz

Nutella

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3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.

vault_tec_redditor

Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.

Meh75

Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.

weirdatwork2017

Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.

Frisby2007

Telekinesis

My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.

dude_bizarro

Ghosts

How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).


How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.

thebeststory

Dogs and Chocolate

Giphy

I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.

KlutzyHedgehog

Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.

SFCopperhead

Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.

SirRogers

Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.

MistalQueensglaive

Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.

BugsRatty

Stars In Their Multitude

Giphy

I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.

theedjman

Colorblind

My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

droneb2hive

Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.

moniker5000

Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...

10d4plus8

Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.

ScreamingPotoo