People Reveal Their Darkest Secret That They’re Just Can’t Hold In Any Longer.

Sometimes, the internet is the only place people feel safe enough to spill their deeppest secrets.

Here, people share their darkest secret they'd never share with anyone else.


1/28. I'm in a committed relationship with an amazing women, however I'm in love with my female best friend. I'm torn between two women and I have no idea what to do...

Jaz1027

2/28. When I was told I had cancer last week, part of me was happy because I've completely messed up my life and this seemed like a get out of jail free card. I was going to fail out of college. Come to find out that I've got a rather large tumor in my brain which prevents me from reasoning properly. Yeah it's going to kill me within a year, but my self-esteem has gone way up, because I'm not as dumb as I thought I was.

princeofpieces

3/28. I'm a lesbian, but I have a husband and 2 children. It's hard to even understand how I got this far into my "fake" life without realizing this is not what I wanted. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love my children and my husband is a great man, but I can't help but think about how my life would have been different if I'd come to this realization sooner. I feel like it's too late for me, and that if I come out now all it will do is ruin the life I have built.

[deleted]

4/28. I occasionally fantasize about the deaths of my relatives. When I was 14, my aunt passed away. Every single person that was in the room when the news were delivered broke down in tears. My mom was hysterical. I, on the other hand, was actively suppressing an urge to laugh. I found the situation genuinely entertaining. This brings me to my dark confession- I am relatively certain that I am a borderline psychopath.

-Calypso-

5/28. My father was diagnosed with Stage 4 Cancer back in February of 2014.

Nearly everyday while he was sick I took care of him. I made sure to take him to the hospital for his checkups, his CT-Scans, his X-Rays, bathing him, cleaning him, making him laugh, and holding his hand in my hand, and his arms around mine while he was on his way to his final departure from our family. I tried to be the strong one out of all of us, encouraging my family that we'll all be alright, and he'll be okay no matter what happens.

I held him for the last 36 hours of his life while he was in a coma, dosing him with Morphine, anti-saliva medicine to clear his throat so he didn't choke on his spit, and another medication to relax him, on the hour every hour, only a few drops, just to make sure he was relaxed while he finished packing up and leaving us. I didn't leave his side, because he was a damn good father to me, and never left mine. He told me he wanted to at least make it to see us all around him on Easter Sunday, he passed away in my arms on April 21st.

My family thinks I'm doing okay (story continued on the next page...).

Continue onto the next page for more!

My family thinks I'm doing okay, I still pretend to be the strong one, comforting them when I see them, but they don't know that I'm extremely depressed. Every time I hear a sad song, I just sob like a baby. Every time I sleep, I have a dream of him, or a nightmare, where I wake up either angry, or sweating, or both. I go to therapy where I speak with other folks who have suffered from the same loss, but it hasn't helped. I've tried bouncing back, even attempting to fake my own amusement while I have a drink with some friends, but it's not the same. The vigor I once had for life is gone, everything feels pale and tastes gray. The thought of not being able to hug him again crushes me into oblivion. I don't know when I'll recover, but if life is going to be like this the rest of the way through, I'd rather not experience any more of it.

I'm sad.

grubtubs

6/28. That the month I was "living a month in Spain" was actually spent in jail. I had friends to post fake Instagram pictures for me too

I was sentenced to 1 month for DUI and the month I was supposed to do my sentence happened to be at the same time as I was actually going to Spain for a month. So instead of traveling to Spain, I went to jail. No questions ever asked from my family. This was the first (and last) time I had ever been into any trouble. Most awkward bit was to figure out excuses for not driving the following year.

WorldWideWeb03

7/28. Two and a half years ago I was in dire financial straights, so I sold my home to keep my struggling business afloat. I neglected to tell the owners that they have an 800 sq. ft. bunker on the property that I built about seven years ago. The bunker that I've called home since I sold it. The entrance to it is well-hidden, but I still come and go very early/very late in the day.

I'm a single man who keeps to himself. I'm now in a situation where I could move somewhere else, but I love this hidden paradise so much.

throwaway215091

8/28. Back when I was 12 or younger, me and my other male friends would give each other "penis massages". We had no clue what we were doing. We thought that this was what sex was like.

Evidently this isn't too uncommon, right?

ThrowawaySnow

9/28. When I was in my early 20s, I had to have my uterus removed for health reasons. My now boyfriend REALLY wants kids, so I've never told him I actually can't have any. I'm worried he would leave me if I told him. He thinks the scar on my abdomen is from getting my appendix removed...

[deleted]

10/28. For two long, awful years I was horribly addicted to a certain synthetic substance that almost ruined my life on multiple occasions.

Started smoking weed early on. Got a good job that wouldn't allow that anymore. A friend had suggested said substance in lieu of the real stuff. At first, it was great. You could walk right in to the head shop and buy the stuff. But I kept using more, and more. I found any excuse to use. My marriage began to deteriorate. I hid it from my wife and my parents, hid it from everyone. I couldn't get enough, I couldn't get high enough. I started coughing twenty four seven. Months and years went by and if I didn't use I would have the worst case of nausea, sweating, and horrible shakes. My marriage almost fell apart, my job performance tanked. I was arrested for reckless driving not once, but twice, with the substance in the car. The second time I flipped my vehicle into a ditch and could have died.

But then I found out my wife was pregnant. I quit right then and there. I endured over a week of the most hellacious physical and emotional withdrawal symptoms you can imagine. I didn't eat for 6 days, I couldn't. But I got support through groups and toughed it out. I have been clean for 16 months. And I have the most amazing, intelligent, beautiful 6 month old son in the world. He is my rock and doesn't even know it. But that kid saved my life, my career, my marriage, and my sanity.

ModestMo0se

Continue onto the next page for more!

11/28. My dad recently asked me how I paid for my college when he knows I don't have a job. I'm never going to tell him that I became a local drug lord for 24 months and moved hundreds of lb's of pot through frat houses and cashed out when I was free of student loans.

TotalTool93

12/28. I, currently, am recovering from bulimia. I have gone almost two weeks without throwing up (or going on a binge), and this is the longest I have gone in well over a year.

Oh yeah, I am a guy. Screw anyone who says eating disorders don't affect men.

throwaway696969dasit

13/28. I am just so bored of everything. I'm not suicidal, pretty sure I'm not depressed and I'm not even sad. I just feel unsatisfied with everything. I am slowly losing pleasure and enjoyment from everything that I do. I've tried going to new places, listening to new music, reading different books, watching different TV. Hell, even porn doesn't get me excited anymore. I don't know what's wrong with me, I just think I am becoming apathetic up to the point where I am just going to fade out of existence. I don't know, I guess this is my dark secret because I haven't told anyone.

thr0waway6006

14/28. I got fired from my job last week, was emotionally crushed and cried like a baby. I can't tell any of my friends for fear of losing the "smart guy of the group" stereotype.

Warbynature

15/28. I work minimum wage at a fast food chain restaurant and I actually love it. I have no career goals and just want to do my crappy job where no one really cares what you're doing, go home, and just relax. Even though I pretend I hate it and that I'm looking for other jobs to my friends/family, I'm really happy with my life there.

[deleted]

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16/28. Recently, I accidentally found out that my older sister is actually my mother. She has no clue I found out. I don't really know why but I feel a mixture of embarrassment and anger. Wish I had never found it out. I may just pretend I learned it and continue living as though everything is the same.

[deleted]

17/28. I accidentally cut off one of my toes when I was a kid, and never told my parents. Since I was really into medical shows at the time, I just used a hot metal rod to cauterize the wound, bandaged it, and told no one. My parents think I have an extreme foot phobia, that's why I always wear socks...

[deleted]

18/28. Lost my virginity to a random hot guy at a party the other day, and unlike what I told my friends, I don't regret it. I really loved it.

psychedelik_mess

19/28. I grew up in a very religious family. When I was about 12 years old, I got baptized. It was a big deal. It was me and one other kid around the same age as me.

Well after all the fanfare, the other kid who was baptized that day comes over to my house to play. And we decided to have sex. I didn't even know what sex was, much less gay sex. I knew we weren't supposed to be naked or touching each other, but I didn't understand why or what these actions meant.

It wasn't until about 3 years later that it really hit me. I felt so guilty. I had sex - GAY SEX - on the day I was baptized. I cried so many nights. I thought about suicide. I worried about whether I would go to hell when I died.

It took me until about 26 to finally accept what happened. I am gay (and no, I don't think it's because of that single incident), and out to my family and several friends. It took a while, but I'm pretty well-adjusted and happy these days.

fifeelguilty

20/28. I've been struggling with depression for quite a while but for some reason, I don't like it when other people start worrying about me so instead I put on this facade by being the "funny guy" in hangouts and it always seems to work.

I used to deal with it through punching walls until my knuckles started bleeding, but the scars are too obvious so instead I started talking to my best friend about it. But then he started getting extremely worried so I've found a new way to deal with my depression.

marboi

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21/28. I've been telling everyone for the past 3 years that I have a boyfriend, when in actually I completely made him up. I realized long ago that I'm asexual, but my parents are very traditional and would never understand. Not to mention all the ridicule I would receive from my peers. So I tell people I met this guy online who lives in France. Gives me an excuse to go and travel to France at least once a year, which has actually been so awesome, so I don't really regret my lie at all.

[deleted]

22/28. I sucked my thumb and had a blanket until I was 17.

Not as intense as everyone else's secret but it still really bothers me.

myshsecret

23/28. I once hooked up with a girl in college. I had a bandaid on my finger before hand. I didn't have it after the deed was done. Never found that bandaid.

asianyarg

24/28. When I was in high school, we had a huge 500 gallon fish tank in my science class room. We had no less than 200 talapia fish in there. Anyway, one day I saw this weird knob behind the tank. So, for whatever reason, I twisted the knob to see what it was supposed to do but nothing happened. The next day, there was a horrible stench in the school and the principle said that someone turned off the oxygen to the fish tank and all the fish died. All 200 of them. He also said that he was looking for the student and that whoever it was would get charged will animal cruelty and expelled. Some how no one saw me turn the knob and know one knows it was me all these years later.

ggenesis3003

25/28. I've been a professional dominatrix for a year and a half and I quit my job at the bar, but my parents have no idea. I also make a lot more money than my parents, but I have to act like I'm broke all the time like how I used to be.

Sevvysev

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26/28. I work as a phone sex worker. It allows me to work part time at my other job and still make lots of money. This is something I will never admit to anyone.

[deleted]

27/28. I found someone who was trying to sell her virginity. I sent her an email with only the sentence, "Please don't do this." She replied asking why not, and I made up a story about how my ex did this and it really messed with her. She then revealed how she needed the money because her mom lost her job and she didn't want to get kicked out of school for not paying tuition.

So I paid her school tuition fees for her.

Last week, she graduated and is currently undergoing an internship somewhere. She insists on paying me back, and I initially refused but caved when it became clear that my phone wouldn't stop ringing unless I gave her a way to repay me. Got a deposit for around $50 to my savings account around the time I sent her my account number.

Ryvaeus

28/28. Ever since my dad died, I've pretended to be the strong one in my family, providing for my mom and my 2 younger siblings.

How did I provide for them you ask? Started selling weed at age 13. Now I'm a successful lawyer and I'm still so worried that one day someone will find out and I'll get charged.

[deleted]

Source

Patcharin Saenlakon / EyeEm / Getty Images

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