People Reveal Their Personal Red Flags That Keep Them Out Of Trouble

Flickr: Sander van der Wel

Folks on Reddit shared the most prominent warning signs to be aware of in ourselves in response to a question posed by evection94:

What are some red flags we should recognise within ourselves?

Plan For Today

if you've been saying "It's only temporary" for a couple years.

It's real easy to get stuck in a rut and distract yourself with some far off plans. Always have something you could be working on that directly contributes to your goals. MajorMustard

No Excuse

Continuously making last minute excuses for yourself. Before you know it, a year has gone by and you've done absolutely nothing. GoochBurrito

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Temper, Temper...

Personally- temper.

Realize that if the people around you are constantly making you angry, chances are that they are not the main issue.

Obviously this won't be the case for everyone but it certainly is for me. I'm spending more time thinking through my responses these days rather than just snapping back at people that probably don't deserve to be snapped at. joegekko

Put Your Behind In Your Past

Dwelling on past events that are completely irrelevant to your current existence. viramp

You Know What Happens When You Assume?

If you are constantly frustrated that no one understands you then you probably arent communicating effectively. Dont assume anyone knows your intentions or thoughts. Try to see the world through a third party view with none of your internal dialogue. cecilium

There Might Be More To Talk About?

When your only way of striking up conversations is by complaining about s*** in your life. That is unhealthy as f***. JohnnyOnslaught


Definitely Don't Keep Score

Keeping a tally of how your loved ones have wronged you and using it in arguments later. ttrriipp

What's The Common Denominator?

If you compulsively destroy all your romantic relationships just to stop worrying whether they'll reject you at some point?

You might have an anxiety problem and should see someone. BeMoreLikeMae1


Learn To Say Thanks

Not being able to accept kindness from others, be it compliments or gifts.

Not only is it a big red flag about your self esteem, it's very off-putting to the people you reject kindness from. jobaisntreal

Are You As Well As You Thought?

When Im doing well but when someone touches a nerve and I get upset, chances are Im probably not doing as fine as Ive led myself to believe. theworldismylobster

Link Feelings

If you notice your mood is greatly dependent on the attitude of someone else, especially in relationships, it can be VERY toxic in the long term. notrub95

Monitor Your Personal Worth

You have to re-orient how you evaluate your personal success and self worth. Start measuring yourself by criterion criteria that are under your control, not other people's. Set some realistic goals and assess how hard you're working to meet them.

For Example:

Rather than "Does Karen like me," try "Have I treated Karen with respect and consideration today?"

Rather than "Do people think I'm fat," try "Did I overeat today?"

Rather than "Is Dad proud of my career," try "Am I supporting myself with my job?" Bearracuda

Last One. Promise.

If you say last one more than a time or two about absolutely anything. nehthan

This Isn't Hollywood

I try to stop pretending I live in a movie. E.G. getting the girl in the perfect way, getting the perfect job, scoring the game winning touchdown.

Holding yourself up to standards found in Hollywood will likely cause upset. Lebagel

Check Your Spending

When you start needing excessive pleasure and happiness...it's because you are depressed...perhaps you aren't able to cope with the daily stress of life or maybe something traumatic happened. shewshoe

It's Not Always About You

red flag when you start talking too much about yourself in a conversation. don't assume everyone is your superfan and is interested. 2timessauce

Source

Keeping To Yourself?

Isolating and pushing people away. uncertainhope

Try Not To

Letting people in is fine and normal. But when people ask me, "How are you?" I totally have no idea what to say. Trying to learn that right now, with a close friends help. Jcashman317

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Opposites May Not Attract

For the longest time I was always falling for girls who dont do relationships. Spoiler alert: they werent good at commitment. jtb3566

Say Hi To Your Mother For me

If you're unpleasant to your loved ones while waiting for a text message from your crush/partner, but pleasant to them as soon as you receive that text, that's a huge red flag. maryteresasarvaas

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Don't Always Trust Yourself

Learn your biases and be most suspicious of yourself when you want to believe/disbelieve something instantly, without really thinking about it. satanicpuppy

But, What If I'm Sick?

Using life's difficulties as a crutch for 1.) never doing anything or 2.) hurting others. Depression/anxiety suck. They really do. But they are not a free pass to hurt your friends and family under the excuse of "but I'm sick." allthebacon_and_eggs

What Do You See In Others?

Sometimes the traits in others that annoy us the most are attributes we have within ourselves that we (at least subconsciously) wish to change. ljahb

And, when the flag is the most red...

Always watch for when you stop giving a f*** about things that matter to you. I_have_no_use 


The Reddit thread includes tons of links and numbers to call in case you or a loved one is in need of help.

H/T: Reddit

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