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People Reveal Which Things Only Happen In Movies And Not IRL

You know those totally unrealistic scenes in movies that never, ever happen in real life? If they bother you, you're not alone.

Nest-egg asked: What's the thing that always happens in the movies that NEVER happens in real life?

Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.


The bad guys are always terrible shots.

5 machine guns somehow missing the protagonist in the room.

pistachiosandstuff

And then the protagonist shoots five bullets from his pistol and gets each of them right through the heart.

JimboNasium

Without aiming.

sludgetok

I still can't use Excel.

Brand new technology being incredibly intuitive for first time users. Seriously, regular characters just walk up to enemy sh*t for example and just start manipulating the system. Yeah, because Bill here can even find Task Manager let alone log into and use some new software at an enemy's base.

SofaSpudAthlete

IT'S A UNIX SYSTEM!

DidYouKillMyFather

/r/itsaunixsystem

csl512

To be fair, SHE KNOWS THIS!

NoselessMonk

And the breakfasts are always fit for a king.

Leaving the house without even touching the breakfast mom made. My mom would kill me.

thebluestIvy

Stack of six pancakes with syrup and butter, eggs, bacon, muffins, juice, everything kid takes a sip of juice "BYE MOM I'M LATE FOR SCHOOL" lookin ass.

iwant2bsuccessful

Yeah, bad plan.

If a girl is arguing with you in real life and you kiss her to shut her up she will most likely not appreciate it.

spoookykid

But it IS an excellent way to find out if your girl knows how to throw an effective punch.

muffinshappyplace

Do you have questions? I have questions.

A single, simple stab wound kills a person instantly.

Like, no, you can be stabbed dozens of times and still live; sometimes even without medical intervention.

Source: Has a family member who was stabbed sixteen times by his wife. He's still alive and was able to calmly talk to her right after she did it.

MikeyTheGuy

It's somewhat bothersome honey. Maybe we should just watch TV.

I-grok-god

I get it, you're a little on edge right now.

Oh dear it seems I am being murdered.

Honey that isn't a very good way to express yourself.

AlextheBodacious

Unarmed, often.

5 bad guys attacking the hero ONE-AT-A-TIME.

ZapatillaLoca

In these scenes I enjoy watching the baddies fannying about in the background waiting their turn. They're usually flailing their arms.

mary-ella23

There was one day in 2001...

Phone call: "turn on the TV"

TV: *exactly the correct station at the beginning of the news story the person called about*

OilyEggs

That actually happened once in my life. 9/11, it didn't matter what station I was on as it was only covering that.

SageRiBardan

That's the exact scenario I thought of. My sister did literally call me and yell "turn on the TV!" and whatever random station it was on was showing NYC. It's the only time I can remember that happening in the modern more-than-3-channels era. Before cable, it was a lot more common because there were 3 or 4 major channels and they all showed the news at the same time.

gianisa

Nope.

When you get out of bed after having sex and your underwear is still on.

DaveNay

Or covering your boobs with the comforter when you sit up even tho you just had sex.

cactusflower___

It makes sense when it looks like the room is cold, but that's pretty rare, and usually the guy is there topless and comfortable.

try_____another

Real life isn't scripted.

Fluid, witty and well rounded dialogue where the characters never do stuff like pause, mumble, hesitate, miss a reference, have nothing to say, etc.

mynameipaul

Every teen TV show in the 90s. High-school kids bantering with university-level vocabulary because the writers wanted to wank their own skills.

thudly

I felt Rick and Morty did this really well with the dialogue. Lot of stuttering, repeating words, misspeaking and quickly correcting themselves, talking over each other, belching, etc. Made it feel a bit more authentic.

sahuxley2

A lot of shows, Rick and Morty included, get around this issue by being ad libbed to some degree, which can help the dialogue feel more real in that way.

Mute2120

Wha's something you've seen in a movie that you wish could happen in real life?

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These people have certainly made their marks on the history books.

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Ignorance really is biased.

We always think we know what is right and what is wrong, what's the truth and what's a lie. The reality is that most of what we know is just an opinion or a partial truth that we've filled in with our own rational (or irrational) explanation. These opinions that we pass off as 'facts' are far from it and it takes a lot of courage to look at yourself and admit you were wrong or misinformed about something. Everyone likes to pretend they're on a different level, but the truth is you're not so different from the people you disagree with. Meditate on that.

Here are a some people admitting strong opinions they no longer have, and what it took to change those views. Redditor u/segafarm asks:

What is the strongest opinion you once held but no longer hold, and what make you change your mind?

Jade-Colored Glasses

I used to think that being cynical/negative was realistic and somehow smarter than being positive. I've since realized that a "be prepared for the worst but expect the best" is far better. We can't control the outcome of anything in life. Being negative makes you miserable rather than protected from bad things happening.

nanaimo

Cant' Have A Conversation With A Parrot

I used to be a conspiracy theorist. Believed that 9/11 was committed by the US government and that we never landed on the moon.

Once I started looking outside of the echo chamber I was in and started looking at alternate explanations, theories and listening to different viewpoints I soon realized how ridiculous those notions were.

Not-A-Real-Subreddit

A Big, Mysterious Universe

I used to be a strict, hardline atheist. I was the kind of bastard that would bring the subject up for no reason, just to argue. I don't know what the hell my problem was. Now I feel like, the universe is big, I don't know what all might be out there, I don't really care. I live as if there is no afterlife, because that makes sense to me. But if you don't, and you believe in one, that's perfectly fine, and maybe you're right. Who knows?

CDC_

Portrait Of An Artist As A Young Man

I used to believe anyone can be a successful artist if they just put the time and effort into it. There is no such thing as talent, only hard work.

What changed my mind: Art school. There were quite a few people that tried hard, but just weren't able to achieve professional level art.

berfica

You're Not Your Emotions

For the longest time, I thought my emotions were in a sense the most "real" part of me. I was always a very emotional person and I didn't make a real effort to control it as I thought it was a good thing, that I was just being honest with myself. Over time though, I started to become very depressed and the negative emotions just keep adding on and on. I thought "this is just how I am I guess". Unfortunately it started hurting other relationships I had, and everything changed when my girlfriend broke up with me. After a lot of reading I found that emotions are not who we are at all. They're just reactions and there's nothing that requires us to act on them or feed them. I'm learning to let it go through me instead of hanging on like I used to.

inca829

Don't Forget Big Willie Style

I used to think that hip hop was bland, repetitive, and all about clubbing and sh*t. Then one of my friends pointed me towards people like Kendrick Lamar, Eminem, Nas and Run The Jewels, who all have great songs and clever lyrics, and I realized that Hip Hop is pretty great.

6quid

The A**holes Will Always Find A Way

I used to think that the catholic church was responsible for all of the hateful people in it. I gave people the chance to challenge my opinion and someone explained it very nicely to me. Basically, the hateful people use the church as an excuse, if you remove the church they will gladly find another excuse.

TianaLeFong

High Times

Giphy

I used to tell myself that I would never stop smoking weed, and that I'd be happy if my kids grew up to be pot smokers... Now I have a kid, don't smoke, and realize what an idiot I was when all I did was smoke all day. I could probably be in a much better position if I hadn't smoked all through college.

But I mean, I still think pot's okay... Just in moderation.

edgar__allan__bro

The Road Less Traveled

"All taxation is theft, man! I made my money without any help from public institutions or the infrastructure they support, I should be able to keep every last dime of it!"

Naturally that was when I was 18, living at home rent free, and working at Pizza Hut as a delivery driver who relied upon public roads for pretty much every cent I made.

ExtremelyLongButtock

All Those PSA's Didn't Do Much

The whole D.A.R.E anti-drugs. Yes crack and heroin is bad, but they over dramatized what happens when you do smaller drugs. Weed isn't even a gateway drug, alcohol is more of a gateway drug. When I saw weed for the first time I thought it was tobacco (This was after all the D.A.R.E training too). Letting the government teach you your morales and philosophy is a thing that sheep do. Don't be a sheep.

PlantTreesForToday

Where Would We Be Without The Kindness Of Strangers

I used to think people on welfare and state assistance just weren't trying hard enough. I grew up spoiled and entitled and it seemed like any kind of charity was a stigma.

Then, my husband became chronically ill, and the economy took a shit. My family has been close to homelessness more than once, and have relied on state insurance and assistance off and on throughout the past few years. There are definitely people out there who abuse the system, but some just get stuck in a horrible cycle of poverty.

I also work in a school that has a high number low income and refugee families. It has really opened my eyes to the struggles that some people face.

BuffyandtheHellcats

He's Still There For You, The Best He Can Be

I could go through life and could seek meaningful advice from my Dad who has always been there for me.

Now he has been reduced to a feeble condition, I am starting to understand I'm out there on my own, and even what he's sure of is suspect given his mental and physical facilities have been rapidly deteriorating in his late seventies. I feel horrible that I have noticed this long before he did - or at least admitted as much.

june606

Clear Your Mind

This was before I received an ADHD diagnosis. When my doctor referred me to an ADHD specialist, first of all I refused to believe him and was kind of slighted that he even suggested that I could possibly have ADHD.

I had a very strong opinion that if I get a diagnosis that I would refuse to take prescribed amphetamines because they are "bad" and "addictive" and that they would ruin my life.

Then I actually tried the prescription and it was like magic.

Xingua92

Going Through The Whole Spectrum

Used to be fairly open with my views on immigration policy. Then I worked for a while down near Corpus Christie doing immigration work. I'd say one out if every hundred people that came through our office was going to somebody who actually wanted to work and try to make a living here. So many people simply wanted to exist enough to get welfare. Many were young men who we would later defend against exportation as a result of their criminal activity. I began to despise the work of defending these men and wished they would be deported.

Now, I'm dating a foreign girl and we are in the legal immigration process. She has advanced degrees and skills, so that makes things a little easier. But it does make me resent people who just bypass the system. We can't bypass the system because I imagine my participation in immigration fraud could get me disbarred.

RogerDeanVenture



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