Some say that there are no stupid questions. They're wrong. See below.
Itsme2006 asked: Whats the dumbest question someone legitimately asked you?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
Next time, try screaming it.
When meeting someone new I introduced myself and she said:
"How do you pronounce that?"
So I repeated my name a bit slower and she says:
"No, I heard you the first time. How do you pronounce that?"
So I repeated my name even slower and made sure to be as clear as possible. Only to be met with:
"I hear what your saying! How. Do. You. Pronounce. That?"
I didn't have a clue what she wanted from me. Our mutual friends all looked super confused too. Finally the class began and the conversation just ended.
Did... did she mean "spell"? Does she think pronounce is a fancy way of saying spell?
This actually seems like it could be what happened.
If my 1 year old and 4 year old are twins...
"They're 3 years apart..."
"Well are they or aren't they?"
My mom told me this exact situation happened to her. My brother and I are 2 years apart, and asked several times if we were twins. One is clearly an infant, and I was almost done being a toddler, people be non-observant.
I literally have no idea.
What are you doing in a movie theatre?
Hunting for rabbits, what are YOU doing in a movie theatre?
I don't know about you but I'm eating popcorn off the floor.
I pay a hefty sum for the right to use this toilet.
"Are you Asian or Chinese?"
Well? Don't leave us hanging!
Bill: what ocean?
Khan: from Laos! Stupid!
I told someone I make my own booze. They were confused by this. His followup question was "You mean you go out and find it? Where"
I stared at him for what felt like a full minute not sure if he was f*cking with me or not. He wasn't, he thought alcohol brands foraged or mined for booze.
May have been thinking of Mountain Dew since it comes from mountains.
He does not know that it is actually farmed! You plant alcohol trees, water them when they flower, you extract the nectar, which is alcohol!
Remember when Chris Christie wanted a quarantine? Lmao
"Did you hear that there are some of the Ebola victims that have turned in to Zombies?"
Said by a girl I used to work with, during the Ebola crisis. She had read some article about a man lying in a pile of corpses, thought to be dead, had been found still alive. The article said something like how it was "like in a zombie film". This girl had read that and COMPLETELY misunderstood and honestly thought the EBOLA VIRUS HAD MADE SOME ACTUAL ZOMBIES! I thought she was joking... unfortunately she wasn't.
That reminds me of the time my ex was afraid the zombie apocalypse had begun, after Florida man got high on bath salts and ate someone's face.
That's a sentence I think has never been written before.
"Does this window cleaner work on glass?"
No, it's only for Windows 10 and newer. You want a bottle of comet and some steel wool for glass.
There was that August memo...
Why didn't other places hours ahead of us not warn us of 9/11?
I wonder if they were born that stupid or if they took lessons.
She is obviously referring to the time space continuum
This one does the rounds on the internet a lot. Not saying I don't believe you but it seems to have happened to a lot of people.
Acronyms are a thing.
Does not capitalizing "acquired immunodeficiency syndrome" mean we cured AIDS?
Former student of mine asked me that when I wrote the words out on the board. She wasn't kidding.
How would one arrive at that question in the first place? Some you could kinda see how they got there, but this one just makes no sense.
When she raised her hand, she said "You didn't capitalize anything," just a statement. So I waited for her to continue. She said "AIDS" is capitalized, but when you wrote the words out, you didn't capitalize anything".
I explained that when you write the words out you don't have to capitalize anything, but when you write the acronym, all the letters are usually capitalized. She never did understand. After 15 minutes I had to give it up as a lost-cause and move on.
Former student of mine asked me that
Does not capitalizing "student" mean you cured STUDENT?
Capitalization vs no capitalization became the biggest joke among the faculty for the rest of my time there.
Twin here! I'm a girl and my twin is a boy.
"So, can you like, feel each others pain and read their thoughts?" From a former colleague of mine, 100% serious.
"Are you identical?" (After hearing our gender)
"Did you mind that you were naked next to your twin in the womb" ??? Seriously??? What??
Seems to be really common to ask dumb questions to twins but I will never know why!
I found out a new friend of mine was a twin and asked him, "Do you guys get on well?" He surprised me by saying, "No, that's a stupid myth!"
After a few moments of mutual confusion he said he was so used to dumb telepathy questions that he had just assumed that was what I was going to ask.
Dumbest question I ever got as a twin was "do you ever think you're the other twin?" With 100% seriousness
Don't spill your electrons.
Not me, but my father told me this one.
He was an electrician before I was born and carried on that career until he passed, but this lady called him about her power being disconnected from her panel (They were putting in a new one).
Lady: So, I had my power disconnected and the wire is laying on the ground...
Dad: Okay, what's the problem?
Lady: Well, if I leave it there will the electricity run out of it?
Dad: Maybe point it uphill so it'll stay in?
Lady: That's a good idea, thank you! hangs up
Edit: It's a receptacle in the electrical field, just to all the people below my comment lol.
And German nonetheless?
I told a female friend that we are so lucky to have found a good kindergarten for our daughter. She was really surprised there are special gardens for kids and she didn't know that we were into gardening... Edit: forgot to say all persons involved were Germans living in Germany.
Sounds like someone failed kindergarten. Though to be fair, it does translate to child garden.
Go for it.
While waiting for the bus someone asked me once, whether eating a whole cow is considered vegetarian.
If you eat an entire cow I'll let you call yourself whatever you want.
Well, erm, no.
"Wait, aren't Einstein and Newton the same person?" - Engineering major...
For some reason, this made me realize we have no units of measure named after Einstein.
There's an element named after him. So there's that.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure.
A new coworker asked me what my name is so I told him. Then he asked if my name is short for anything. I said no and he asked if I sure about that. I thought he was joking. Turns out he wasn't.
To be fair, I think punkterminator is traditionally short for punkterminatorsuperzord
"It wasn't me!"
There's not much you can do when the righteous fist of the law comes down on you. Call it a mix-up, or call it a mistake, if someone's pegged you at the scene of a crime there's not much you can do but trust the justice system to prove you innocent. However, that's a gamble, and just because you've been given a "not guilty" doesn't mean the effects won't follow you for the rest of your life.
Reddit user, u/danbrownskin, wanted to hear about the times when it wasn't you, seriously, it was someone else, when they asked: