People Share Rock Bottom ​Moments Where They Decided To Make A Change For The Better


Life can get the better of us sometimes, and it often takes a pretty extreme situation to help us realize it's time to make a change.

Humans are creatures of habit; we sometimes need a different perspective or major situation to help us see our lives how they really are.

*Content Warning: this article contains mentions of suicide, substance use, and abuse*

Reddit user u/oddsalamander asked:

"At what point did you look at yourself or your life and think 'I really need to make a change'?"


I had just finished another really long shift at a restaurant, coming home to a loveless relationship (ex bf was asleep as he usually was by the time I got home,) sat in front of the TV and had my usual breakdown with leftover sushi and a bottle of Asahi. I was working 7 days a week, all shifts at least 10 hours. I had missed out on so many events with friends and haven't seen my family in ages. I was one of three wait staff in an extremely busy sushi restaurant that also did delivery.

I just couldn't do it anymore. It was extremely lonely. I was exhausted.

Did a 3 day teaching course, moved to Austria to get a teaching qualification, travelled the world (including NK. That was weird.) Now back in the UK, about to start a job in IT.



Lying in bed depressed and couldnt sleep. Did only gaming at that time and even that felt dull.

That was 6 years ago. I started a sport (bouldering), got a job in the gym a year later which forced me to speak with people. Finished an apprenticeship as a sports teacher. Started studying nutritional science and got an amazing girlfriend.



It was actually fairly recent, about a month ago. I was sitting on the couch eating junk when I realized I'm never going to look the way I want to if I keep being a lazy bum. The next day I started eating better and trying to exercise a good amount. I've stopped gaining weight and I'm about to start on keto and doing yoga so I can start actually lose weight to work towards being who I want to be.



I saw pictures of myself from a bad angle and realized just how fat I'd gotten. I was so used to seeing myself in a mirror from that one angle, and didn't notice how bad my weight had become. Seeing that different perspective on my body was really jarring.

Buckled down and lost 35 lbs in 3 months. And most importantly, I didn't gain it back! Held obesity off for a year so far!



I was probably 16 and realised how depressed I was for the last year. How I never went out of my room, didn't eat, always tired, always empty. Even vacations didn't make me excited. So I decided that I will pull myself up and did. Now I'm in a happy relationship (just moved in together), got into my dream school and couldn't be happier. I still sometimes fall into a dark place, but I don't allow myself to stay there



I think around 19 or 20. Drinking and blacking out all the time. Smoking and trying so hard to be cool. It also started giving me anxiety.

Realized that I needed to reevaluate myself. Quit drinking and smoking. Focused hard on school and stopped hanging out with my old friends. Now in my final year's of my Ph.D. and feel so much better about myself.



I used to be very into World of Warcraft in high school. I would play whenever I had the opportunity, I would only stop when my parents insisted, and it occupied my thoughts constantly. So at one point, I was given a great housesitting job; I would stay at their house, fully stocked with cereal, cookies, and frozen pizzas, for a week, away from any distractions.

I played nearly twenty four hours a day, I stopped only to eat, sleep, and bathroom. It was about 5 days in when I realized I hadn't showered in the entire time I'd been there, I hadn't eaten a vegetable, and I was wearing nothing but a pair of 3 day old boxers. It was then I realized it was time to pull the plug. I haven't gotten that engrossed in a game ever since, and I shower regularly



Actually less than a month ago. I've always been a semi-athletic person and was always slim and defined. Some backstory: I've been practicing karate from many years, my master have seen me grow in what I am now. 2 years and 4 months ago I started dating a girl and it just seemed like a really stable and loving relationship. About 9 months pass and we have the first big argument over something really stupid but we get over it. But something is changed in both of us. Arguments get a lot more frequent and I start to eat unhealthy foods and stop curing myself.

Another 15 months of relationship pass and we decide to break up. Finally I see the results of 15 months of a toxic relationship. I've gain some weight, lost muscle, have no more energy to train properly and my whole diet is a mess (this of course is combined with the psychological damage).

When I see myself into a mirror I could not believe what I saw. It struck me so much that in less that a week I was already training at my maximum capabilities and completely change my diet. It's been a month now and I'm starting to see results, hopefully when I'll go back at my karate course in September I'll be better than ever.

Sorry for the long story, writing this it's a huge weight off my shoulders. Thank you for reading and have a good day



A few weeks ago.

(I've always been healthy, 130lbs active.)

Couple of weeks ago I realised that i had been sitting at a computer everyday for the last 4 years and I weigh 170lbs and essentially live on junk food.

I get overly exhausted from the lightest of exercise. Started going back to the gym and eating right again. Feel abit like a frog on a hot pan, unaware of the damage done because i've become indifferent to the slow change.

It's really tough, and I could only work out for 30 minutes the other day. But I know that in a couple of months I'll be able to workout for over an hour and feel much better for doing it!



I was standing crying in the rain in the middle of the night at 18 years old after I'd moved out while my parents berated me and screamed at me on the phone because my university grades were slipping. And I realized that I never saw anyone else out there being yelled at when I was.

They are no longer part of my life.



Stepped on the scale for the first time in months and saw that I was 208 pounds, the heaviest I've ever been. Looked up my BMI online and sure enough, 208 was obese for my height. I've always been a little heavy, but in the last year I just blew up like a balloon. I started doing keto on June 1 and now I'm down to 186 pounds. I ain't lookin back!



I gave all my time and energy to a job that didn't appreciate it. I have depression & anxiety and work was a decent distraction, but the workload was piling up and I never felt like part of a team. Some of the senior staff were so catty and nasty. I was working overtime to get the never ending to do list finished (because they didn't train anyone else to help with my job) and the next day there was always someone unhappy with something I hadn't done, when I'd done 50 other things that were also 'urgent'. I was exhausted.

Got to the point where I was crying when I got home, and crying in the morning before work, trying to find any excuse not to go. I confided in my manager (who was just an oblivious lump - I have no idea how he ended up a manager) and all he said was "Oh crumbs....I hope you feel better soon". Yeah, no. My notice went in shortly afterwards and I'm now in a much better job that takes my mental health seriously.



Right now, actually. I can't seem to find a job with my current certifications and portfolio, so I think I might have to figure something else out. For reference, I finished my last certification course in September 2018 and have been applying for jobs since. I've had a rare handful of phone interviews, but nothing has ever come from them.



Every couple months since a year after graduating high school. I wasn't a POS, but close. I was a huge jerk for sure, but there wasn't one big moment that made me think about myself and my choices. It just sort of happened one day. I thought about where I was, how disappointed I was, where I wanted to be, and realistically what I had to do to get there.

I think everyone needs to reflect and self evaluate themselves now and then, just to see if you're happy where you are. Whether you're happy or sad, up or down, you can always improve, for your self and the ones you care about. It doesn't necessarily have to be something huge either. Purposeful positive changes no matter how big or small are good for everyone.

Make an effort to give people compliments. If you admire something about someone, tell them. It will make their day if not their week. Small things.

Good morning, good afternoon, good evening, and goodnight.



I always asked myself, "why doesn't anyone like me? Why doesn't anyone want to be friends with me?" And then I kinda realized that I was a jerk. I was very cold and showed little to no emotion in front of others, and I was extremely defensive and sensitive. When I finally came to that realization, I was ashamed of myself. I didn't want to be that way, nor did I want others to feel bad about themselves because of the way I acted.

That's when I decided I needed to make a change. I apologized to a lot of people I had mistreated and started working towards being a better person. If you looked back at me from the past, you'd never know I could be capable of being the person I am today. My life has definitely changed for the better since I finally decided to be honest with myself and change.



When I turned 40 I did some soul searching. And SOMEHOW I realized I'm not what I thought I was. I'm actually good Looking. Tall and strong, well built with all my teeth and hair. These are things that I knew, in my head, but didn't feel until that night. Since then.... I've found a new partner who's amazing. Beautiful, supportive, smart, funny. I've started a business that's doing well. I've gotten my finances more or less squared away.

I've done things that I never thought were possible. Singing in front of a crowd. Wrote a book. Built amazing things. And, the other night my girlfriend and I hooked up with a swinger friend and her girlfriend. I've realized that although I've always thought I had bad luck, in actuality...I live a charmed life. And, If I'm honest, I always have.



When I was sitting in a restaurant with my abusive mother for visitation and she kept pushing my buttons to get me to blow up at her in front of the restaurant staff. I ended up walking home in the rain that night, all the while having her tail me and yell from her car to "stop being so unreasonable". On the bright side as I got home, she parked in the driveway and called the police, when the officers showed up they were very understanding and helped calm me down. Never had to go on another visitation after this happened, thanks to the guy who represents minors in court.



When I was really young, I was angry a lot (mostly hormones because I started puberty VERY early). I always had trouble controlling my anger and would hit my sisters if they annoyed me, one day I realised how shorty that was and simply stopped, I would instead leave the room (sometimes they would follow so I would just shut myself in my room) I at one point bruised my knuckles punching a chest of draws in anger, but I haven't hit anybody in years (except in a playful way).



My friend had just betrayed me in a huge way(sabotaged and destroyed a handful of friendships through gossip until one was smart enough to talk to me about what she was saying) while I allowed her to live rent free in my home during her divorce. It was the last straw in a series of dramatic events in our group of friends. I decided this wasn't the lifestyle or social group for me if everyone was so willing to be fickle about loyalties. I left and developed fewer but more meaningful friendships from then on.



The day I realized I'd been living for everyone else's happiness, and hadn't been putting my own happiness as a priority. This was close to 3 years ago.

I've since started grad school (5 classes left!), changed careers and received a promotion, sought therapy and meds for my me talk health, and have eased off contact with family that's been a toxic part of my life. I am the happiest I've ever been, but more importantly, I feel like me, and I feel strong. I love who I've evolved into and I love the family I've curated around me. I don't feel alone anymore, and I feel loved. While some of my curated family is blood (namely my mom), it is mostly made up of people I've met that are genuine and compassionate folks. I adore them all, and as best I can tell, they adore me too.



It was 6am on a Monday. I was unemployed, about to get kicked out of my apartment. All I had was 10 bucks I stole out of my gf's purse. And I had an interview later that day.

I didn't even care. I threw on some dirty clothes and went to the bar down the block— earliest place open near me.

Walked in, bartender's in the can. I thought about raiding the register and just walking out. When she came out I was ashamed.

You know how some bars have that mirror behind the bar? Everything is so much clearer in the light of day. She looks at me and she's like, "really?" (They all know me there.)

I held out the ten nodded. When she turned around I caught my own gaze in the mirror and thought, "this has to change."

She was like, "good luck," and handed me a roll of quarters. Laundry day, amirite?



Mother lost her job at the start of last year. Had a nervous breakdown and fell into depression. I was a 1st year college student, and quickly found a part-time job so we could eat. My life became 24/7 work, school, taking care of her. The thing is, she started drinking and lying in bed all day, every day, and refused any sort of treatment.

It was draining me in every single way imaginable, became antisocial, my grades fell, I got fired from my job. After a year of this I fell into depression as well, at which time my father (my parents are divorced, he lives out of country) stepped in, said this is ridiculous, tried to get her treatment. She refused again, and got insulted that he thought so little of her. Then he just came to me, offered me treatment and said we need to get you a roommate and your own place.

Since I've moved I passed all my exams, got a new GF, and am currently looking for a summer job.



Freshman year of college I joined the karate club, in order to obtain the next rank you need to pass three things, kata, self defense, and sparring. I just got my yellow belt (the order in my style goes white, yellow, orange, green, purple, brown, and black) and was testing for orange.

Well you know about the freshman 15? I gained 25 pounds since starting, and I was already overweight to start, and sparring consists of fighting consistently for about 2 minutes. I finished kata and self defense and was about to start sparring, I was already exhausted. After just one minute I couldn't breathe, I was hyperventilating. I managed to pass my test and swore I never wanted to be that unhealthy again.

J lost almost 50 pounds since then from joining weight watchers, I'm testing for my purple belt, and now I can spare for about. 6-7 minutes without a break.



Let's just say that it was a gradual realization that, no matter how many people I would talk to, that I still had no friends. No one REALLY cared about me outside of wherever I met them. So I had to start changing my way of staying in my own head and reading too much and not doing anything at home. It's been a gradual change but I'm starting to building up a social life after years of not having one.



I was unhappy with my weight for a while but never was motivated to fix it. Then my first baby died after I delivered at nearly 24 weeks. I was close to dying from severe preeclampsia, but they were able to save me. He was so behind in his growth they couldn't help him.

10 weeks after he passed I got up, literally looked in the mirror and decided to take control. Preeclampsia can have lasting effects on your overall health and being overweight/obese is a risk factor to develop it in future pregnancies. I want to be as healthy as I can be for my family, and make the most of the second chance the doctors gave me.

40 pounds down and I'm pregnant again. Cross your fingers for me.



Waking up with drugs I didn't remember buying, with the an awful booze hangover. Thinking about all the awful stuff I could remember doing that night/morning, the look on my friends face when I said I was going to join others and keep partying. Then doing a line to try and kill the hangover.

Sitting there, feeling the same shame I felt every morning- that heavy cloud of anxiety, disappointment, and unhappiness.

Happily sober for almost two years now.



Friday morning. I woke up with a lacerated ear, a black eye, and a hairline fracture in my right wrist. According to friends, I didn't make it out of the doorway of the place where we were drinking. It's neither my first blackout, nor the first time I was injured during one (cracked my head on two separate occasions DUI on a bicycle), but I have come to terms with the fact that my alcohol tolerance has dramatically decreased in the last few years. It would be a preposterous lie if I said I'd quit cold-turkey, but it is evident that I must endeavor to drink less in the interest of survival.



After my first wife died, I spent a lot of time with her family and especially her sister (long story). About the one year mark I come to the realization that I didn't see myself "moving on" as I should have been. Mainly because I was still spending about much time with her family (75% with the sister) as my own family. I constantly reminded of the life I had and lost and by being with that situation, it was never going to let me move on.

I had plans to "take a break" from her family but the drama with the sister accelerated them leaving my life. After that and the dust settled, I moved on, met the next love of my life and we are engaged. I haven't spoke to anyone in that family in a few years.



When I realised that I was worthy of having a fulfilling life.

I suffered from anorexia from the age of 12-20 and spent the entirety of high school on the verge of fainting. I was scared of absolutely everything from food, sitting, social gatherings, travel, family dinners, events you name it. Any situation that compromised my sense of control was traumatizing. I went to therapy for most of that period, but that was when my parents forced me to.

I was completely closed off and took nothing from the sessions because I truly wanted to remain sick. When I finally decided I wanted to take the leap towards a life resembling happiness that is when things began to slowly change. Today I am 22, have a full time job and great relationships with my body and those around me. I am soo much more flexible and able to adapt to new situations. I still struggle from time to time, but I am now equipped with the tools to combat those fears and life a well balanced and healthy life.



When I stopped my bike in the middle of the freeway at midnight coming off of a brutally hard shift at a job I hate and contemplated whether or not I wanted to die right there and then.

Also known as yesterday...

It's scary to suddenly contemplate suicide when you're in a bad place both mentally and physically. I didn't realise how messed up I've been feeling for the past three years until I looked at the darkness and felt that I didn't want to see the light anymore.

I'm handing in my two-weeks-notice on Friday.



It took a lot of mess ups, A LOT. And every time I kept saying "that's it, I can't keep doing this. It's time to make a change" and a few weeks later i was still doing the same behavior.

I don't know what finally did it but I was finally able to say "don't stay out at a bar till 4am. Don't involve yourself with dangerous activity. Don't be a stupid jerk" and I got my life back in order. It's still a struggle because I constantly panic myself over the consequences of my behavior catching up with me, like I feel like I deserve to be punished for it or something, but I've stopped acting the way I used to. And that's a step.



This actually happened to me a couple days ago. I have been going through a low period in my life. I am close to flunking out of college, have lied to many people, am not mature or independent at all. I hated myself (And still do to an extent). I was tuning my friend in on my life and talking to her about some things I was bottling up. When I told her that I did not know what exactly I wanted to do with my future, she made me write out my life goals and how I was going to achieve them

I had realized many times in the past that "I really need to be better and make changes", but yesterday... I really felt like I had to change. As I was writing these goals down and how I was going to achieve them, I realized these goals are going to be difficult to achieve. It will require lots of discipline, time, work, and mental strength. For the first time, however, I genuinely felt that I could achieve those goals and come out on the other side a completely different and mature person who I love. i can feel the happiness, thirst for improvement, and positivity flowing through me. I am hopeful and not scared anymore. I'm going to go out and slam dunk those goals!



I used to be a MEGA pessimist with depression. Like seriously even the most jovial things were easily malleable into something negative. I always found a way. Not only did people hate me for it, I began to literally hate myself. I'd go back and forth in my head telling myself to shut up for once and think more positively. My pessimism and depression has lessened alot since then. I'm actual hopeful and open-minded now.



I found out 4 yrs back that my bio dad has diabetes and about a year back he lost his vision due to it. A few months back found out that my mom has diabetes too. I don't have diabetes but I'm what doctors call morbidly obese and weigh 320 lbs. I'm also visually impaired. About a week back I decided it's time for a change, I don't want to die when I'm 40. I'm 28 now. I think I have time to make that change. I asked my doctor for a referral to a weight management clinic and for which I've an appointment mid-August.



I had to have emergency surgery because I had a ectopic pregnancy. I would have bled out if I hadn't had surgery on time. I'm 30, overweight, didn't finish college and have a job I'm doing just to survive because I'm broke af. After a good look at my life I signed up for business school, I weigh 16 kg lighter(have 14kg more to go) and have a brighter future ahead.



After my ex & I split after 5 years. We moved to a different location to start our lives together only for that to end & in the process I didn't realize until after the break up and being single that I was pretty depressed and felt held down in that relationship. The relationship ended on a good note but I realized how much of myself I had lost/given up and I pretty much made a vow to myself to think clearer and to not put myself in a position where I am not okay if this other person decides to leave my life. All in all, I feel wiser & I love myself more bc of it.



I was in an abusive relationship and had wanted to leave it for months, but one day I had an epiphany when watching Requiem For A Dream (I figured that if I kept going as I was, I'd be miserable forever, so I should change my life - unlike how the characters in the film didn't do that and then succumbed).

Few days later, I left the girl (after 10 months together) and never looked back. I've been single since, but I've been so much happier. I didn't realise how much my mental health would improve.



I was drafted out of the coal mines. I did my dozen as a rifleman in the Vietnam boonies. Picked up some quality PTSD. I was discharged and home for a week before I showed up at the mine looking for my job back. The man said, "Sign here and we'll have you back in a week."

My family has been mining coal for 225 years. I looked him in the eye and said, "Thank you, but I don't think so."



My 24th birthday. I got blackout drunk and did a whole bunch of blow at the local dive bar with "friends" (people who were around because I had coke). One of them gave me a ride back home and the following day I had my parents give me a ride to go get my car. As they drove off, I found myself clawing the little rocks and flakes of coke from the carpet of my car, that I sloppily dropped the night before, and gumming them in some vein hope of not feeling like shit.

As I lit a cigarette and the crisp morning light shined through the windshield into my squinted, droopy eyes I knew it was time for a drastic change.

So I did, I haven't touched any kind of uppers since then. I bought a new car, moved out of my parents into my own one bedroom apartment, and even quit smoking. I cannot say that I miss the way I used to live at all.



I was suffering from severe bullying and decided to cut contact with all of social media until I felt like I was safe to use it. This was multiple years ago and I haven't suffered any bullying since. Back when I was young, I had no friends and didn't believe anyone truly considered me important. Today, I know who my friends are and although I'm currently on a break from social media again (not from bullying, I am trying to sort my life out whilst it is pretty chaos). I'm hoping to meetup with them in the near future and fulfill my hopes of becoming a more social person, something that each of them want from me.



I was in a really bad spot in life, beginning to wonder what the point of it all was but realizing my thinking was getting a bit dangerous. I went through my text messages to find someone to try to talk things through with and realized I didn't have a single person I could reach out to for help anymore. All of my text messages for the three years I had my new phone had been work related. It made me realize that I wasn't doing anyone any favors killing myself with a job. You have to learn to balance things or you'll lose everything that makes life worth living in the first place.



After the mother of my child cheated on me and left me with full custody I was not about to let her feel like she got the better deal by leaving. So I got on anti depressants and made such intense lifestyle changes that I was among the most toned and appropriately muscular people I knew. Along with that I finished my undergrad and now am nearly finished the equivalent of a masters degree, all while raising our kid without her. It all comes from that point of thinking "I want you to regret robbing my child of a mother". Revenge bod is good but I went full revenge life on her.



First time: When I woke up naked, in a backyard koi pond, in a neighborhood I had never been in, without any belongings.

Shortly after the koi pond incident: Woke up in the middle of the woods. Luckily found my cell phone nearby. Friend figured out where I was and came to get me. Both times I ended up in a place without my car. Finding it was tough.
I quit doing drugs and stopped drinking after that and got help for my CPTSD. I tell people that I was lucky that I didn't end up dead in a ditch somewhere. They think I'm joking...but I'm not. Childhood trauma will try and kill you as an adult.



The day my now ex-husband and I started a verbal argument and I saw that each of my three kids had picked up something to use as a weapon to defend me, in case he got rough with me. That broke my heart and I knew it was time for a change.



I was working in a restaurant and they were rolling out this fancy new menu so for 2 weeks they had us all come in every evening to try the food with wine pairings. I'm not sure how it happened exactly but we ended up taking the excuse to all go out together after. So for 2 weeks we had our tastings and then went and partied together.

Before then my whole world was the guy I was dating and the friends we shared. These two weeks messed my head up real bad. People were nice to me, they wanted me around, they wanted me to participate. They laughed at jokes and sincerely listened if the chats got serious.

They were essentially strangers and they treated me better than anyone in my life ever had. And my god... I was happy. Do you have any idea what it feels like to realize what happiness truly feels like? When you haven't felt it in years?

2 weeks later I left my bf at the time. My "friends" decided that made me a bad person. So I cut them out too. I cut out my family as well, cause screw being their scapegoat.

I didn't just jump to the new friends either. I'm now married to one, and another I call my "music mom" but I didn't jump right in to it. I had finally realized I hated myself and that was wrong. I went all on hermit for a bit and got therapy and got my life together.

Then I rebuilt, and even though you can't escape struggles or the the mental illnesses I have my life is infinitely better. It's not even worth comparing.



I woke up naked in a bathtub. Not knowing how I got home, how I got naked, or why the shower was running and pleading with myself. "I dont want to be my parents."

I called the suicide hotline, told them. I am not suicidal but I cannot control my own thoughts. They gave me a list of resources for help in my area and the next morning I called every one. One of them was a non profit and wouldnt cost me much since it was sliding scale fee. I had to get an evaluation done, but in the past I always lied or hid information. I told myself, "not this time." I told them everything.

All the abuse I suffered as a child, physical, mental. The failed murder of myself by my biological grandfather on my mom's side. And more. Spared no details. An hour evaluation turned into 3.5 hours. I was Diagnosised with PTSD and that therapy changed my life. Sure I screwed up a bunch of stuff. But I am much happier now and still mess up. Just not as badly.



At a Denny's.

Late at night I was there with a girl I was pursuing and her friends. One of which sent back a bagel several times for not being toasted enough then being too toasted then being white bread then being not white bread.

The group was about 7 including myself. While the girl I was pursuing was amazing herself her friends were obnoxious but I had typically chalked that up to being youthful, it takes all types, various other excuses, but that bagel situation made the scales from my eyes fall away.

I was suddenly aware of just how loud our group was, how the servers avoided us, how rude the group was openly and loudly complaining of "such bad service." I started evaluating what it was I was doing and if this was a path I wanted to go down.

I gradually faded out of the girls life, I didn't want to be confrontational and don't think it's right to use ultimatums of "your friends or me" at that time.

There was another more personal experience that happened a bit later that only further confirmed my decision was the right one.



I had to crawl literally crawl over a mountain of trash and clothes the same size as my bed, if not bigger to go to sleep. Half of my king size bed was full of trash. Roaches started showing up. For weeks, I let them crawl on me. I was so depressed and immobilized, I couldn't even care about roaches crawling all over my body. Remembering that time makes me want to throw up. I'm glad to say I'm somewhere else now doing much, much better.

For perspective, during this low, low time I was an attractive, fit commercial model. My nails and hair were always done. I didn't smell. I did not look like who someone would imagine slept in roaches. Mental illness does not discriminate, nor does it have a look. Sometimes it doesn't even change your appearance. We really have no idea what others are going through.



When I met a transgender woman in Colorado who was confident, happy and successful, and realised that I couldn't be any of those things if I was lying to myself about who I was.

Two days later she helped me come out of the closet.

So yeah that was how I started this month.



When I stopped my bike in the middle of the freeway at midnight coming off of a brutally hard shift at a job I hate and contemplated whether or not I wanted to die right there and then.

Also known as yesterday...

It's really scary to suddenly contemplate suicide when you're in a bad place both mentally and physically. I didn't realise how messed up I've been feeling for the past three years until I looked at the darkness and felt that I didn't want to see the light anymore.

I'm handing in my two-weeks-notice on Friday.


If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).

Transgender people can get help through the Trans Lifeline at or call US: 877-565-8860 Canada: 877-330-6366

To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at

Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like


My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308


My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango


I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina


With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3



I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold


Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.

I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-


Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.

An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451


Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence


How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster


My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"



It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?


I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)

The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.


Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.

I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.


Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.


Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.



Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.




3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.


Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.


Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.


Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.



My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.



How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).

How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.


Dogs and Chocolate


I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.


Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.


Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.


Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.


Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.


Stars In Their Multitude


I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.



My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.


Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.


Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...


Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.