People on Reddit were asked: "How have you made a rude person's day worse?" These are some of the best answers.
She gave me an exasperated, "my bad" wave and continued to talk on her cell phone, ignoring me as I picked myself and my bike up. I walked right up to her open window, grabbed her cell phone from her ear, and chucked it into a nearby parking lot as hard as I could. I swear that was the farthest I have thrown anything in my life. She gaped at me in shock as I struggled back onto my bike and slowly road off fuming yet victorious. Then a half mile farther on my trek I got attacked by a goose. Not my best day.
2. I worked at a hotel several years ago and had to deal with insufferable pricks about a dozen times a day. The best/most evil revenge I ever got was on a guy that stayed with us four days a week for the entire five years I worked at the hotel. The big utility company in our area was having financial issues and he was the leader of the auditing team that was sent in to straighten it out.
Anyway...I would interact with the guy at least a few times every day I worked, and he was ALWAYS very rude and condescending. As an example, one of his co-workers would ask me for a local restaurant recommendation and he would chime in with "Yeah, because minimum-wage workers are known for their taste in fine dining." If someone asked me something personal, he would say something like "Ask him what life choices he made to be here plunging toilets and writing down my preferred wake-up call time. Maybe he can share his wisdom so we all avoid his fate." Stuff like that. He was just a [jerk] to everyone on the hotel staff, and was always very demanding.
Since I saw him every day, I noticed that he had developed a relationship with one of the younger women on his auditing team. I saw their romance blossom from flirting to full-on groping and grinding in the hotel lobby. One day he had just finished delivering one of his delightfully crappy bon mots to me, and I was fuming. Then he screamed at one of my co-workers because she had a Filipino accent and he said he only wanted his room cleaned by "white Americans." I vowed revenge.
His wife called in to speak to him later that night, like she usually did, and I said "Oh, I think he's sleeping in her room tonight. One moment, please." and then I connected his wife to her room. His wife must not have told him what I had said, because he didn't try to get me fired.
They got a divorce. They didn't have kids, but according to another guy on the auditing team, his wife got the house and custody of their dog. He stopped staying with us shortly after "the phone call."
3. Today on the train I sat next to a woman who was angry that I sat next to her because she wanted the two seats to herself. As I sat there she kept mouthing under her breath how she just wanted to sit there alone... blah blah blah. Despite the fact that I wanted to tell her that it was public transportation and she needed to get over it I kept my mouth shut. A few minutes later a woman with a large purse comes and stands in the same car I was in. I get her attention and tell her that she could have my seat. She huffs and puffs her way to me and I help her sit down while grinning at the angry woman who was upset I'd sat beside her. I enjoyed watching her head almost explode from anger as the other woman's purse pressed against her for the rest of the ride.
4. I was working as a shift leader in a Dunkin' Donuts (spent two years in that hellhole) and dealt with my fair share of rude [jerks]. One particularly memorable day, a group of ladies came in during our busiest hour, just past noon. The line was almost out the door and we were short staffed so it was pretty hectic. While they were ordering, one of them asked for a job application and started filling it out on the counter. She handed it back before they were done ordering and I stashed it on a shelf under the register and started making their food. They had a huge order and we did our best to get it out quickly, but it was obvious from the looks on their faces that we just weren't quick enough for their liking.
They sat down to eat their food, and the girl who just turned in her application got back in line. I spotted here right away; she was standing with a glaring face, crossing her arms and tapping her foot, trying her best to look obviously (almost cartoonishly) pissed off. So I motioned for her to come up to the counter, since I knew she had a complaint and I wanted to get it fixed right away. I assumed that in the shuffle we had messed up her sandwich or something like that; anyone who's worked in fast food knows that these things happen when it's chaotic. I asked her what was wrong, and she pointed to her BOTTLED Mountain Dew and barked (definitely not an "indoor voice"), "THIS IS FLAT!" It was a bit accusing, as though it were my fault that the bottle of soda she just opened was flat.
So I took it and told her to get another one out of the cooler, then check it to make sure it was good. After all that, she asked for a refund. I said, as politely as I could, "Ma'am, I replaced your soda, sorry if there was an inconvenience but I don't think a refund should be necessary." [something like that, I don't remember my exact words] So she stormed, pissed off, back to her table and started complaining loudly to her group about not getting a refund.
So, since I was having an awful day anyway and really could not see a [woman] like this ever working for us, I grabbed her application from the register, walked it over to the lobby trashcan nearest to her table, crumpled it up and threw it away as she watched. The look on her face was priceless.
5. So I do work at a church, by work I mean if I missed a week they are unable to have a service. So I'm busy from the second I walk in to the second I walk out and normally am running around with boxes, wires and the like.
One woman sees me do this, and every week moans about things that she thinks is wrong and DEMANDS me to listen. This woman hates me because I'm not from a Christian home and is very vocal of her dislike of me. So I'm carrying a mop and a bucket to clean up a spill, and I kick open some doors and rush through because I'm busy and from behind I hear a nasally "EXCUSE ME! OPEN THE DOOR FOR ME!". I put the mop through the door handles, locking her out of the church and went along my jobs.
6. I apparently made this [jerk's] 65 cent coffee wrong at McDonald's, and he asked me to "MAKE IT AGAIN" and started to go off on me. I almost snapped on him, but I instead threw my hands up and told my manager to handle it. The manager talked to him and came back to me and said the guys a [jerk] and comes in all the time and does this just make him another coffee.
So I walked to the drive-thru window with this [jerk] fuming in his car next to me talking to himself about "How long this is taking...etc." Soooooo I picked up the half full pot of coffee I made no more than 4 minutes ago and dumped that out. I proceeded to brew a whole new pot of coffee. I saw this made him extremely angry so I went to the window and told him that its going to be another 5-6 minutes because that last pot was bad. He then peeled out of drive thru like a [jerk] without a coffee.
7. I work at a retail location that does returns strictly only with tags on the clothes. There was one customer who was exceptionally rude to our staff. She called both women working dumb, which pissed me off.
She came up to the register telling me she'll probably return all the things shes buying and is just trying to impress her friends. So I took all the tags off the clothes when i was bagging everything. I bettered the world that day.
8. I used to work for the Department of Motor Vehicles and the one I worked at had pretty limited parking, surprise! I had left for lunch, came back and was having a hard time finding a place to park. I finally found a spot so I drove up to it and put my signal on showing that I was waiting for it. People, in my experience, usually respect this and continue on. Not this time.
Just as the car was backing out, after I had waited a few minutes, a car came from the opposite side of the lot, made eye contact with me and then shot right into the parking space. I was so mad because now I would be late after looking for a new spot. As I drove past the woman that had taken the spot, I just shook my head and she responded by shrugging her shoulders, smiling, mouthing the words, "oh well" to me and then ran her finger from her eye down her cheek as if to mock me crying about it.
I continued into work, got in trouble for being late, but had actually forgotten about the incident until who's number gets called to my station, but Miss Spot-Stealer herself! The look on her face was priceless!
Keep in mind that I'm not your average DMV worker, I understand that stuff happens and waive penalties all the time and treat my customers with respect because I believe that what goes around, comes around and I know how crappy it is to wait at the DMV all day! I'm usually so nice about getting penalties taken off of people's accounts that I get in trouble for it at times.
So, I greet Spot-stealer as nice as I would anyone else, in fact it may have been nicer than I normally would be. She may have thought I didn't recognize her. Her registration is FAR past due, with hundreds due in penalties. I let her tell me her whole sob story then finally tell her that she owes in full because she was aware of her due date. She argues it a little until, out of site from my manager, I mouth the words, "oh well" and drag my finger from my eye to my cheek, mocking her tears. At that point she puts her head down and proceeds to take out her card and pay the full amount because yes, we do take debit cards! :)
What goes around, comes around!
9. I watched a lazy shopper park their grocery cart right behind another persons car instead of putting it in the cart return. I got out of my car, ran up and moved the cart and put it behind her car. I then ran off and watched her have to get back out of her car since she couldn't back out, and then finally proceed to put up her cart the right way. I felt like a champion of the people.
10. I work in local theatre, and we have a lot of rude, awful women who are part of local ballet schools come through our venue who are the mothers of the dancers. Once this woman rang up wanting seats to an almost sold out ballet performance that had been on sale for 4 months the day before the show, and did nothing but abuse me for 5 minutes because she left buying them too late, whined about how she shouldn't have to pay to for her kids, whined that we should get a bigger venue (it seats just under 500 -.-) then put me on hold while she rang 3 of her relatives to see if they wanted seats too. She was positively awful. The seats I was about to sell her were the only ones in the theatre left, and they were good seats.
While I'm on hold a grandma of one of the ballerinas comes to the desk and asks if we have any seats left, as she'd been in hospital and couldn't buy them earlier, but said she'd understand if we were booked out. I put the phone with the on-hold music down and sold this eldery lady the last seats for the show, and gave her an invite to our next years dance season for her granddaughter and herself, so she'd know exactly when all the important dates were coming. She thanked me over and over, and she's now one of our regulars and brings her grandkids to our shows.
2 minutes after the elderly lady leaves the [angry woman] on the other end finally takes me off hold and says she wants the remaining seats that we have left, I tell her "Sorry we've just sold out while you had me on hold I'm afraid, better luck next next year, anything else I can help you with?". She was choking with rage on the other end of the phone, it was fantastic.
11. One time I was out getting frozen yogurt, and there was an employee there who kept trying to hit on me in an incredibly annoying fashion. When I didn't respond, he basically followed me around until I reached the cash register, and started talking to the cashier about me.
"We used to go out," he says to the obviously annoyed cashier. She looked up at me, confused. "Uh... yeah, sure buddy." I replied. "It was a bad breakup though. We don't talk anymore." I decided it was time to shut this guy down. "Yeah, everything was dandy until I walked in on him in bed with my brother."
Cashier started laughing so hard she could barely finish putting in my order. Then when she handed me my receipt, the charge read "$0.03".
12. Where I work, the bar is an L. I was taking a break from serving people behind the bar and was sorting out some glasses and putting them into the dishwasher which is where the small side of the L is. There were three of my co-workers to my right/behind me who were all serving on the large side of the L.
Where the glasses and dishwasher are, you can't buy drinks because it would interfere with a fire-exit. A woman and her husband came up to where I was and ordered. I told them politely that if they would like drinks, they need to go around to the bar. She got upset and started swearing at me. I nodded, took two steps to my right as they walked around the pylon to order their drinks from one of the girls.
I smiled and told the girl who was about to serve them that I'd take it, they looked confused and ordered their drinks. I said that I was cutting them off. The woman blew up and asked why. I said that if she couldn't treat the people who make her drinks with respect, she didn't deserve to get drinks to begin with, and that she had 10 seconds to leave the bar before I called security and had them escorted out.
I don't consider it my job to be pleasant to people who aren't pleasant to me. If you're downright rude, you're out and we don't want your business.
13. Came out of the supermarket one day to find that someone hit my car. A stranger told me the person who hit my car got out, looked at the damage, and parked at the other end of the lot. I went to where the car was parked, and confirmed (paint matched) it was the car that hit mine, flattened all four tires, and left a note on their windshield telling them to have a nice day.
14. I'm in a massive line at a store. I'm next in line, but the person in front of me has a [bunch] of stuff. A helpful clerk sees the mess and opens another isle saying, "I can help the next customer." Well, that's me. However, the checkout counter has two sides- a right and a left. It is set up for people to come to the right side, but the left can be used as well. As I am stepping over to her counter, this [jerk] from the very end of my line is sprinting to her counter, pushing people, with his partner in tow. He arrives right before me. They have a mountain of items in their cart which he starts throwing on the checkout counter. I am standing there on the other side with my one item, burning with rage. Checkout girl waits until he stacks all of his [stuff] on the counter, looks at me, looks at him, and says to him, "I'm sorry sir, you're on the wrong side. You'll have to go to the end of the line." Which is now massive. I put on my biggest grin, made eye contact with him as long as possible, and loudly told the clerk how awesome she was.
15. I was walking down the street smoking a cig. When I see a woman eating on the side walk patio eyeballing me. I was still 30 feet away and she was waving her hand in front of her nose and pointing for me to cross the street. Instead I walked past her and managed to cut a nice audible fart right next to her as I kept walking. I was proud.
16. Years ago, I was in a grocery store express checkout line (20 items or less) and the line was long. The guy behind me starts huffing and puffing about people using their credit cards. "Doesn't anyone use cash anymore?" "They should have a cash-only line." As more people use their cards, he gets louder and louder. I was buying a $1.25 pack of gum and had $2 cash in my hand. It was too easy. As I rang up my gum, I put the $2 back in my wallet and pulled out my credit card. The look on his face? Omg... PRICELESS!! Even the cashier had to chuckle as she handed me the receipt and the guy swore as I signed it and handed it back. Made my day!
17. I was working as a manager in a big nightclub about a year ago. I don't wear a uniform, but have a radio and run the security team. The venue has a great smoking section that looks out onto the street. One night the venue was packed so I did my usual roam making sure that there were no problems, however it was too packed to walk through the smoking section, so I walked down the street instead, but could still very easily see into the smoking section.
One guy stares me down, then calls me over, and starts swearing at me for no reason and telling me that "pieces of [crap] like you could never even get into a venue like this". He obviously had no idea I was the manager, however I didn't want to have security get into a fight inside with him. The guy kept telling me he would punch me out etc. and was clearly trying to look macho to impress someone. So I agreed and told him to come and meet me outside and he could even have a free swing. He puts his drink down, takes off his jacket and storms outside. Once he walked outside, I walked back inside and told security not to let him back in.
The look on his face when he realized I ran the place was priceless, and then the realization that he couldn't get back into the club was amazing. It was the easiest and most fun removal I have ever done.
18. I used to work with this guy who was super loud and rude. He would take over the whole office with his booming voice, drowning out all other conversations.
One day, he was being particularly rude and obnoxious. He came over to my desk talking really loudly about his (apparently horrible) date the other night. I looked over at my other coworker, cutting him off, and said, "Did you hear that scientists say the louder people talk, the dumber they are? Apparently, the loudness level of your voice directly correlates with hoe little you know about a certain topic."
He started talking MUCH quieter after that.
19. I used to work for a major bank and while doing my stint there I came across a ton of [jerks]. I was taking a deposit for a lady and her daughter and I heard them speaking a Middle Eastern language. At first I wasn't paying attention but when I realized they were speaking Farsi, I was all ears.
Reason: I speak Farsi.
They were talking about how much of a loser I was, how this job as a teller was the only thing I had in my life, that I probably didn't have a girlfriend and didn't attend school. Throughout this conversation I spoke only English to her and every time she responded to my requests she would smile and then say something nasty about me in Farsi.
At the end of the conversation, I switched up the language and said, "Just because I work at a Bank doesn't give you the right to say things about me behind my back. I'm in grad school to become a psycho therapist and this job is for spending money. This isn't how Persian people behave and you should be ashamed. Is there anything else I can help you with?"
Her daughter left the building and her mother was beat red, embarrassed, apologized profusely, and left. I never saw either of them again.
20. I was waiting tables in an Italian restaurant that was originally opened by a man and his wife, but after their divorce, the restaurant was bought by their daughter. She was an ok boss; not fantastic, but not terrible. Her father, who had opened the restaurant, still worked as a cook and was a piece of [crap]. He called the waitresses [terrible names] behind their backs and made a bunch of off-color comments while flirting with his favorite older ladies. He would scream at the younger women, bully cooks on the line, and there was a story about a "mishap" with some fryer oil and a fry cook a few years back.
He didn't give me a lot of [trouble] because I was usually on my game; I had the times down for how long most of the food took, and adjusted for the load of the kitchen so I was always present in the window when it was ready to go out. I always heard his snide little comments, muttered some of my own at him a few times, but I always waited for the perfect time to get him, and get him good for being such an insufferable prick.
Finally, I got my chance. I had two plates up in the window when I walked into the kitchen. I was waiting on a third, and a side of meatballs. He accosts me as soon as I walk up there and says something along the lines of "Why don't you get this food out of my window?"
I calmly looked at him and replied, "The next time you say something like that to me, this food is not going out. This food is going on the floor."
This guy was easily six feet tall. I'm 5 feet 1". He just kind of smirks and said, "I'd like to see you try that."
I picked up one plate, of spaghetti and meat sauce (probably takes less than a minute to plate, anyway) and just flipped it over in the window.
"And I need my order of lasagna and the side of meatballs, too."
The expo guy had a look of admiration on his face and shock at what I had done. He didn't even seem pissed at having to re-plate the meal. I'm not sure, though, I was blind with rage, and marched out of the kitchen and out onto the floor. We really weren't that busy; I think they had a bus kid clean it up. I wasn't spoken to about the incident except in passing, when the daughter admitted her dad could get a little intense, and her sister (who also worked there) explained that her sister often got into it with their father, and it wasn't that big of a deal.
He was always polite to me after that, and never hassled me again.
21. I was next in line at the grocery store and there was a pretty long line. This woman behind me was making huge fuss about them needing to open more registers and she was swearing and muttering under her breath. When a second clerk appeared at the next register to open another register he looks at me and says, "I can help the next person in line, sir". The mumbling [woman] behind me saw the clerk coming and had backed her cart up and was rushing for the register that was opening. Now there was a cart parked between the opening of the two registers blocking me from walking directly. I saw the woman barreling towards the open register I swiftly push the cart blocking her path and move my basket into the now open register. Her face got so red and looked like she was going to explode as she nearly collided with the cart. I just looked at her and said in the most innocent voice I have "Ooops, he did call for next in line." smiled and got checked out as she had to go all the way around ;-)
Best part is one other person managed to sneak in behind me and she ended up having to wait longer as a result. Best day ever.
22. I play poker in the casinos a lot. In one in particular there is a ridiculously loud obnoxious [jerk] who plays quite regularly cash and tournaments. He fist pumps and yells, "Ya!" when he sucks out on people. Totally uncouth to everyone in the room. To top it off he is a larger guy, tattoos, and tries to physically intimidate people.
Now, I am not a small guy in the slightest, 6'4 230lbs. But when I am relatively clean cut, I look very UNintimidating. I am polite and friendly, know most of the dealers and half the patrons by name. What this prick job doesn't know is that I know how to handle myself both in a battle of verbal whit and physical fists. This leaves unafraid of the plausible physical consequences to standing up to him. So one day he was being his typical self but to a larger degree and I had had enough. He is verbally berating another player at the table for their "terrible call" even though the pot odds and eventual result seemed(to me at least) to be a GREAT call.
So I just burst out, "Mike buddy, I have been meaning to ask you... how"s that violent case of herpes treatin' ya?!" The table sits in silence. It takes him 5 seconds to explode, "I'll kick the [crap] out of you!!!" The houseman walks up to the edge of the table having heard the escalation in conversation, and is about to intervene on my behalf as you are clearly not aloud to threaten other players with physical violence. I raised my hand slightly and indicated that everything was fine, and he holds off, and awaits my response. I looked [him] right in the eyes and calmly stated, "Buddy, if you can find your balls and figure out how to use them, we can figure this out in the parking lot?" ... ... ... "Whatever man.", He stuttered back. "So thats a no then?!" I asked. Still no real response. "Then maybe you should concentrate on not continuously bleeding chips, in stead of running your mouth."
I got a bunch of "Thank you's" from many of the regulars, even those that weren't there and heard about it later.
23. My husband and I were driving just over an hour home from my in-laws' house and for reasons I can't remember, we were in separate vehicles. To make the trip more tolerable, we had each other on speakerphone.
Although the highway was not particularly crowded, he was a bit further behind me, directly behind another car that was driving very slow. So, he put on his left blinker to go around the guy. As soon as he started to move left, the guy abruptly cut him off only to keep at a snail's pace in the passing lane. By that point, I had slowed down enough to catch sight of them right as this was happening. Jay, being much more patient than I, decided to just pass him on the right without signalling. When Jay started to move right the guy swerved right. Only, Jay hadn't given him the benefit of a blinker warning, so they were nearly side by side by the time the other guy started to move right and the guy had to swerve back into his own lane to avoid hitting Jay.
Before the other driver had time to make it more of a nonsense pissing match of trying to get in front of one another, I was slowed down right in front of him. Again, there really weren't many other cars on the road at all, and since we were on the phone, we could coordinate. I slowed down in front of him, Jay kept pace with him on the right and he had the cement wall on his left, so he was boxed in and forced to slow down to our pace, which for me, dropped from 75 mph to about 50 mph. We decided to keep it that way, for the remaining 30 - 45 minutes of our drive home. He never signalled or honked, but he did make a ton of confused and frustrated faces. I giggled uncontrollably the whole way. Definitely worth the extended driving time.
24. This guy walks up to my work and asks "Hey, kid, where is Voodoo Donuts?" I'm twenty seven, he swore in front of a child nearby and was loudly smacking his gum. Instead of sending him to Voodoo donuts which was only a few blocks away, I gave him directions that would lead him under the Burnside Bridge where the homeless and the drug addicts congregated.
Breaking up is hard to do.
And when you get the law involved, it's even worse. But sometimes people don't need the law's help to make things overcomplicated, they just have a grand ole time making that happen themselves.
People on the front lines of human cruelty include divorce lawyers. These are their stories.