People Share The Extremely Embarrassing Things They Saw Other People Do

People Share The Extremely Embarrassing Things They Saw Other People Do

A short horror story: You trip. You stumble, throwing your arms all over the place, looking like a crazy person--but you don't fall. You compose yourself, and quietly say, "I'm glad nobody saw that." An amused voice from just over your shoulder says: "I did."

Such is our bad luck when we think nobody is watching: somebody almost definitely is. And so Reddit user Hjaaal wanted to know:

What's the most embarrassing thing you saw someone doing because they thought nobody was watching?

Here are some of the most embarrassing/hilarious answers.

Puddle Aerobics

I was in college and it was a very rainy day. I was late to class and happened to see a guy with a pretty heavy looking backpack, looking like he was going to jump off a diving board. He was rocking his arms, bending his knees enough to look like he was gonna sit down.

Instead of walking around it, he was trying to jump over a huge -ss puddle. I watched him prep himself for a good 20 seconds..which was probably way too long to be staring at someone.

He attempted said jump, slipped backwards due to his huge backpack, and got absolutely soaked. I feel bad saying I laughed quite hard.


I had discovered online porn (I mean really, who didn't) but was unaware of the browser history being able to be checked by anyone else using the family computer. My interest at the time was a website called '' which I would frequently visit when trying to release teenage angst.

One night at dinner, my parents sat us kids down to talk to us about something very disturbing they found in the browser history and had very serious looks on their faces. Naturally, having grown up in a Christian home with 2 other brothers, I knew my porn obsession was found out. My parents began to talk to us about violence and their worry about the glorification of violence online etc. Naturally I was very confused as this was not the discussion I was expecting.

My mother, obviously the more jolted by what she found online blurted out, "I'm just very worried because someone in this family has been looking at a website called 'my friend shot mom' and it's made me very uncomfortable".

I didn't say a f-cking word to correct her. Crisis averted.

It Didn't Need To Happen...

Ok so back when I was still living with mom she had one of her friends up for the week with her son. There wasn't enough room in the house for them to stay inside so they decided to camp out in the backyard. now I was working construction at the time and was up pretty early to get ready. the one morning while i was putting my lunch together i looked out the kitchen window to see my moms friend squating over a plastic bag taking a sh-t in it right there in the open. one of the most disgusting things ive ever seen. and then she proceeds to walk inside the with her bag of fresh sh-t to get rid of it and stops dead in her tracks when she realises that im this day i dont understand why if her plan was to come inside to get rid of it why she didnt just walk inside and use the fully functional toilet and just cut out squating over a plastic bag in the middle of a field.


When I was in Military Base Traning(in Austria) we used to jogg every morning with our drill sergeant. We were stationed an an airport and so our route contained usually one airport round. This day, our sergeant was in a good mood and when we started to run, he asked us if we got cigarettes with us. Most of us did, so he said fine and started running, we behind him.

We just started running and were next to a slender part of a forest, when suddenly our drill sergeant made a turn to the left into the forest. The forest was probably 10 meters (30 feet) wide, and we went inside. He told us we wont be running today, and lets chill here in the bushes in the forest, hang out and have fun while smoking some cigarettes. We just had to pay attention to the side where we went in, that no other jogging groups would see us so we and our drill sergeant wont get in trouble. We also had to take care of the other side of the forest exit, as there was a small fence and a sidewalk where civilians sometimes passed.

So we were inbetween the trees, probably 20 young men with our drill sergeant. If somebody would pass from either side and look into the forest, he would have seen us. But we were quite remote there so we didnt expect anyone to pass.

Suddenly, two elder women(probably around 50-60) walked along the fence. The sergeant saw it and told us to shut up. We watched those women pass by. They didnt see us so we continued to chat.

After about 5 minutes, one of the two women again came along. She probably brought the other home or something and was heading back. Again, we shut up and watched her walking. When she was at our height, she stopped. She stopped and started looking back and forth, seemingly checking if someone was around. She looked to every side, except to the forest. Then, she pulled down her pants, got on her knees, and took a huge dump right next to us. We were probably 2-3 meters away and EXPLODED in (silent) laughter.


Every summer my friends and I go to a waterpark. As we are adults we often like to drink while we're at the waterpark. So one summer we were sitting in the bar area that the waterpark at set up enjoying overpriced beer, there was a woman sitting at a picnic table just below the balcony of the bar. She slides back so that her rear end is hanging over the bench and just pees right there on the AstroTurf while still chatting with her friends. She thought that no one had seen her and that she had gotten away with it, but we saw and thought it was absolutely disgusting.

When Will My Reflection Show...

I used to work in an office right next to a FedEx facility. Our windows were reflective, and faced the FedEx truck parking lot.

Sometimes we'd see FedEx employees change into their uniforms behind the trucks, not realizing that the mirrored surface that was right next to them was actually an office with about ten people watching them.

Not All Heroes Wear Capes

When I was in 3rd grade I let out a ginormous loud fart I thought would be silent. I was mortified. Everyone in the class erupted with laughter and the teacher started asking "who did that?!". I was so afraid someone would point to me but before they could a kid, no, a HERO, named Alex raised his hand and said it was him. He was always a weird kid so people believed it and that was that. Idk if he was being nice or just likes taking credit for farts but I wish I could thank him.

Being A Kid Again

I do freelance work at sports events. One time, between setup and the time the game started, I was standing at the top of a hill that leads up to the building. I looked around to make sure nobody was there, then I laid down and rolled down that shiz. It was super steep, and it was awesome. I got up, brushed myself off, and went back inside to work.

Found out the next week that my boss had seen me, and had told everybody on the crew. Joy.

Secret Gymnastics

Whenever my shift is quiet, I take a couple minutes break and go practise doing handstands on the nice grass by our building. I'm awful and can hold it for about 2 seconds before I flip over and land hard on my arse.

Last week the security guy offhandedly mentioned there's a CCTV camera that points almost exactly at that location. He's been watching me handstand for about 2 weeks

Power Positions

At parties I would often dedicate myself a look in the mirror with a smile for a confidence boost, but this one time there was another guy doing the exact same thing, rising his eyebrow and smooching at himself.

There was a silent agreement not to talk about it. I still wonder if he remembers.

Not The Pillow, The Wall

When I was like 6 years old I saw my first make out scene in a movie and didn't quite understand what they were doing and why. I wanted to be an actress so bad when I was little so when the movie was over, I went to my room and reenacted the kissing scene with the wall lol. My grandpa walked by, I turned around in embarrassment because I heard someone walk by, and he just walked away with a weird look on his face. :( lol the cringe hurts

That's Not Ice Cream

I once saw a girl holding an ice cream cone in one hand, and her phone in the other lick the screen of her phone. When we made eye contact and she realized I'd seen it happen, she looked like she was going to die.


I'm the wierdo.

I usually take my iPod with me when I go to the shops, because it's the only "me" time I get. Unbeknown to me, I had a tendency to....bop my head along to the music....and more. I was simply enjoying my "me" time. This had garnered the attention of the staff. I became known as the dancing customer. I discovered that one when I couldn't find something I wanted, and asked one of the staff to help me. From an aisle over, I heard him ask an older colleague for the specific thing I'd requested and then say "Yeah, it's the dancing lady asking". That's how I found out I wasn't always just listening to the music.

I can't dance to save my life. I'm sure the CCTV logs are very interesting.


I was in a meeting in my client's boardroom. The boardroom was at ground level and the exterior glass was mirrored on the outside but see through from inside. In the middle of the meeting, some sketchy looking dude comes over and starts picking his teeth in the mirror. Then he looks left, looks right, sees he has privacy, so he whips out his junk and starts inspecting it in the mirror. My client just got up, walked over to the glass, and gave a little rap on the window in front of him. He put his junk away and moved on.

Finger Guns

Ugh okay, so basically there was a lot of construction going on in our house and one fine morning, I forgot to lock the f-cking door before bathing. My back was towards the wall, but there was a glass vase by which I could see the scene behind. One of the workers accidentally got in and froze. During this time I had the option of-

a) pretending I did not see him

b) shrieking for good god.

I went with option 'a' because my mom would have pretty much fired the poor guy who accidentally saw her daughter's butt, but he literally just stood there for 30 frozen horrific seconds before running the f-ck away. If you think that was awkward imagine the guy working on our house, and my room for a week after this. He couldn't look at me, I would constantly have a smile-grimace hybrid on my face when I'd see him, and on the third last day when we crossed each other and he gave me finger guns before scampering away like he'd seen an octopus with the face of James Franco.


I'm a canoe guide, and being the guide I'm usually in the back of the canoe, steering. On this particular day, because it was training and I was with a bunch of my coworkers, I was in the front.

When I'm in the back, I'll periodically check to see if any plumber's crack is showing by basically feeling my lower back/top of my -ss crack with my finger, then readjust my underwear if needed. I'm in the back of the boat, so no one sees that.

However, on this day I did it in the front, giving the guy in the back of the boat a full showing of me fingering my -ss crack. He promptly said "I think that's a back-of-boat maneuver."

My Parcel

I once purchased adult toys online. I came home to find the parcel containing these items OPEN sitting on my bed with a note from my mum saying "sorry, thought it was my parcel". The shame was unbearable and I still cringe when I think about it. I tried to deflect by texting her to ask if she had any wrapping paper I could use for 'the joke present I bought for my friend's 21st'. Eurghhhh

That's Me Nose

Oh, it was me. I was waiting for an online interview for an internship program and while the interviewer was away I remembered I still had my septum piercing on, so obviously i pushed it inside my nose before anyone noticed. As I was adjusting the hidden piercing, the interviewer got online and saw me basically picking on my nose like an -sshole. We had an awful 5 seconds of silence before she decided to proceed with the interview like nothing happened. I got the internship and now have to avoid her around the company because she always seems to remember and look at me funny.

A Delight

I have a lovely elderly neighbor across the way who tends her garden almost daily. She is sweet as can be, and doesn't bother a fly. Our houses are pretty far apart, I'm not a good judge of distances but it's far enough that she feels concealed.

When I sit on my front porch, I can see her clear as day wherever she is in her yard, but she can't see me because of the arrangment of plants between us, and my slightly higher elevation.

She always, ALWAYS, adjusts herself, like overtly. She has a routine every time she stands up and moves, from kneeling on a planting cushion.

She stands up, pulls off her garden gloves, does a little wiggle shake, jams her entire hand down the back of her pants and evacuates a wedge, pulls her bra strap down where it rode up in the back, scoops each tit back into place, and moves down to a new spot to garden.

She repeats this maybe 25 times before she calls it a day. I sit outside and smoke a bowl and watch her and it delights the hell out of me (in a she's a cute, funny old lady way, not a sexual way, just to be clear.)

Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like


My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308


My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango


I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina


With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3



I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold


Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.

I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-


Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.

An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451


Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence


How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster


My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"



It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?


I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)

The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.


Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.

I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.


Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.


Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.



Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.




3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.


Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.


Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.


Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.



My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.



How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).

How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.


Dogs and Chocolate


I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.


Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.


Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.


Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.


Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.


Stars In Their Multitude


I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.



My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.


Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.


Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...


Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.