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People Share The Moment They Decided To Ditch Their Toxic Friends

Hit the road Felicia!

In the immortal words of Ms. Britney Spears.... "You're toxic. I'm slippin' under!" We all have wasted precious amounts of our lives on people who didn't deserve it. Most of the time we can't see right away the poison that festers in their souls. And sometimes we care too deeply and just think, they'll change, and that almost NEVER happens. You have to do you first and rid yourself of the toxic!

Redditor u/Zombi3Bait wanted to spread the word on the best ways to clean house at life by asking... People who have had really crappy friends. When did you realize that you shouldn't be around them?

You're Mine! 


Looking back all the signs were there, but the final straw was when she started picking on my friends instead of just me. She couldn't stand that I was making friends other than her.

Also I was talking to a former teacher who had taught both of us and I said I wasn't as close to her as I had once been and the woman looked me straight in the eyes and said "good. keep it that way." SunflowerSupreme

One Down! 

When I realized I didn't want to share good news with them because they wouldn't be happy for me. Complicated-Captcha

Or they always try to "one up" you on sharing good news or story telling. Never asking follow up questions to your announcement. Aylongfortheride

Oh hell no! 

They put alcohol in my drink after 14 months off drinking because they thought I was becoming boring. I was trying to quit because of addiction. kobemiller

There is a particular place in hell for those kind of people. Good job of you keeping your addiction at bay. Reddit

War and Peace..... 

I realized we argued all the time, and not about actual stuff in our lives, but all this petty nonsense. Like, is this movie good, or politics or what's the definition of a sandwich.

I think that those guys just never learned in have a real conversation. All they knew was having a different opinion and arguing about it. And the thing was, they didn't even like to "win" the argument because then it was over. And they'd just keep finding new topics to argue about, and take more and more extreme positions to get people to argue with them.

So being around them was frigging exhausting. I just want to talk to you, not have to defend a position. PM_ME_UR_Definitions

It's My Party... 


They threw a massive party on my birthday, for someone else's half birthday. They invited almost everyone I knew but me because "we know you'd probably want to do something for your birthday."

I just kinda cut contact with all of them, allowed myself to be a loner for a while. This year, my news friends are taking me to Amsterdam for my birthday! pollywantsareddit

F U Megan! 

My "best friend" from high school knew my fiancé was cheating on me and having unprotected sex with strange men and didn't tell me. I only found out because I broke up with him for other (very valid) reasons and "Best Friend's" boyfriends little sister was around when I was talking about it.

I said something along the lines of "I'm sad cause I thought we had something. I was his first. At least he didn't cheat on me."

To which the little sister scoffed and got a "Shut the f**k up" look from my friend.

I dragged it out of her eventually, but yeah. She knew he lied about never having been with anyone else and that he was cheating on me. In fact, all his friends and mine knew. And no one told me. But I was especially pissed at her. I moved 6 hours away two weeks later and haven't spoken to any of them since.

F**k you, Meagan. charlottedhouse

Lonely is better! 

When they'd constantly make plans in front of me, but told me I couldn't go with them. I knew I should've stopped hanging out with them, but I didn't have anyone else. TRHtimmy


When she made plans with me and another friend, but then canceled them with me and I found out 2 days later that she still went with our other friend. That was the straw that broke the camels back for our friendship. I immediately blocked/deleted her on all social media and cut off contact. It was actually such a relief to not have to work to keep the friendship going. GarshCT

Don't Need Them! 

I asked everyone in my friend group if they were going to homecoming, every one of them said no.

Me and my boyfriend went alone, decided to take some pictures before the dance at a popular place in town. Saw every one of them, without me, walking into a restaurant in their nice dresses and tuxedos. I haven't spoken to them since. lavaflow666

Some people have no soul... 


One day I took acid. He got jealous and intentionally tried to make me have a bad trip. Months down the line I confronted him about it and his words were "I thought about how wrong that was but I didn't care."

Since then I don't care about him. PM_ME_UR_LAST_DREAM

No Apologies....

The apologies really didn't seem genuine tbh - it seemed like they saw on social media how much better my life had gotten without them. After all of the manipulative crap they pulled on me and the horrible things they said to my face and behind my back, there was simply no way I could trust any of them again. That's exactly what I told one of them. She didn't even really apologize, she just said she'd changed. I told her I was happy that she was working on becoming a better person, but there was no way I could allow her back into my life after everything that had happened. I trusted my gut and have absolutely zero guilt about my decision. The damage was already done. I don't need apologies from them, I just need them to go on with their lives and leave me alone. beyourownwindkeeper

Making our own choices....

When I was harassed for not responding to a text message within 15 minutes and thus blamed for the fact that a friend had self-harmed again. crystallolivia

OMG! Grow up! 


I've known them since I was 5 so nearly 20 years now. We have all grown up and aren't the teens we were. We all have had different sized barriers come up against us and not all of us are flawless after them.

I sadly have realized that some of them aren't worth the stress they put out into the world and onto me. There is fakeness there too and it's not worth being around that much. We are adults now and I don't need cliques and gossip.

I still am around them but I'm glad we are now one of those "omg we have to plan a dinner or night out soon!" And never do. freddie_delfigalo

Thou Shalt not be a Thief! 

We moved in together as roommates, and slowly, the narcissistic traits started to reveal themselves. Pretty early on I started to suspect she was stealing from me. Then came the lies. She believes she is superior to others and values her own time and energy more. She fobs off her responsibilities onto others, and if challenged on any of this behavior, she either stonewalls or she plays the victim, accusing others of bullying. In hindsight, I realized that every nice thing she had ever done was for her own gain. I'm moving out this weekend and I could not be more glad to be rid of her. tw231116

Sick to my Stomach! 

When I dreaded coming to school the next day and having to interact with her. She just made me feel terrible about myself and always tried to make up for it, but I can't pretend like everything is ok again. chaoticsynthetic

People be crazy! 

When she asked me to abort my baby so she could heal from her child passing the year before. I waited til I was 5 months along to hesitantly and delicately share with her And she complained to my parents I was being selfish to keep it.. seeing as we are good friends and i should be sad with her. We live about 8 hrs away from each other. so no way she would have known, however mutual friends would know and I figured it'd be awful if she found out through them while I pretended I'm not having a huge change in my life. That's super deceitful. There were other things over the course of our 15 yr "friendship" that were hurtful and mean towards me but that was the last straw. Suzette243

Red Flag Waving....

When they wouldn't bother to text me back, organize to hang out with me, or bother to make an effort to sit next to me when we took the train together every morning. I realized my best friend of 8 years turned into a self-centered person that hated me because my other friend decided to talk about me behind my back and everyone believed her. Read the red flags and don't be blinded. Love and friendship does such stupid stuff to you 😔 emmypoos

Not Good Company...

When I was hit by a car, broke lots of stuff and was bedbound for half a year. Nobody checked in how I was doing and I got 1 visitor in that 7 months.

Up till that point I assumed these people I hung out with every day for the past three years were my friends, but it turned out to just be a group of people that smoke weed together every day. Intergalaktica

Pinch me and I'll Punch you! 


We worked out together a handful of times. The last time we did, she pinched the roll of fat above my sports bra and said, "aw. we'll get you there." Cut her out pretty quickly. ginfizzzzz8008

?!?!?!?! who thinks that kind of thing is okay? Wow... whereismydragon

$$$ Changes Everything! 

When over a short period of time they came into huge money and did not realize that I was not on the same level with them anymore. Suddenly, overnight decisions to fly to NYC for a week was a thing, or going on expensive NYE parties in Thailand, and were surprised when I refused. It drained me financially in the first year or so, then it became impossible to keep up with merely a quarter of what they were up to. Inevitably, we went our separate ways overnight basically.



We've all had those friends, we may even have been those friends at one point. How did y'all get rid of the toxic mess in your lives?

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What is the strongest opinion you once held but no longer hold, and what make you change your mind?

Jade-Colored Glasses

I used to think that being cynical/negative was realistic and somehow smarter than being positive. I've since realized that a "be prepared for the worst but expect the best" is far better. We can't control the outcome of anything in life. Being negative makes you miserable rather than protected from bad things happening.


Cant' Have A Conversation With A Parrot

I used to be a conspiracy theorist. Believed that 9/11 was committed by the US government and that we never landed on the moon.

Once I started looking outside of the echo chamber I was in and started looking at alternate explanations, theories and listening to different viewpoints I soon realized how ridiculous those notions were.


A Big, Mysterious Universe

I used to be a strict, hardline atheist. I was the kind of bastard that would bring the subject up for no reason, just to argue. I don't know what the hell my problem was. Now I feel like, the universe is big, I don't know what all might be out there, I don't really care. I live as if there is no afterlife, because that makes sense to me. But if you don't, and you believe in one, that's perfectly fine, and maybe you're right. Who knows?


Portrait Of An Artist As A Young Man

I used to believe anyone can be a successful artist if they just put the time and effort into it. There is no such thing as talent, only hard work.

What changed my mind: Art school. There were quite a few people that tried hard, but just weren't able to achieve professional level art.


You're Not Your Emotions

For the longest time, I thought my emotions were in a sense the most "real" part of me. I was always a very emotional person and I didn't make a real effort to control it as I thought it was a good thing, that I was just being honest with myself. Over time though, I started to become very depressed and the negative emotions just keep adding on and on. I thought "this is just how I am I guess". Unfortunately it started hurting other relationships I had, and everything changed when my girlfriend broke up with me. After a lot of reading I found that emotions are not who we are at all. They're just reactions and there's nothing that requires us to act on them or feed them. I'm learning to let it go through me instead of hanging on like I used to.


Don't Forget Big Willie Style

I used to think that hip hop was bland, repetitive, and all about clubbing and sh*t. Then one of my friends pointed me towards people like Kendrick Lamar, Eminem, Nas and Run The Jewels, who all have great songs and clever lyrics, and I realized that Hip Hop is pretty great.


The A**holes Will Always Find A Way

I used to think that the catholic church was responsible for all of the hateful people in it. I gave people the chance to challenge my opinion and someone explained it very nicely to me. Basically, the hateful people use the church as an excuse, if you remove the church they will gladly find another excuse.


High Times


I used to tell myself that I would never stop smoking weed, and that I'd be happy if my kids grew up to be pot smokers... Now I have a kid, don't smoke, and realize what an idiot I was when all I did was smoke all day. I could probably be in a much better position if I hadn't smoked all through college.

But I mean, I still think pot's okay... Just in moderation.


The Road Less Traveled

"All taxation is theft, man! I made my money without any help from public institutions or the infrastructure they support, I should be able to keep every last dime of it!"

Naturally that was when I was 18, living at home rent free, and working at Pizza Hut as a delivery driver who relied upon public roads for pretty much every cent I made.


All Those PSA's Didn't Do Much

The whole D.A.R.E anti-drugs. Yes crack and heroin is bad, but they over dramatized what happens when you do smaller drugs. Weed isn't even a gateway drug, alcohol is more of a gateway drug. When I saw weed for the first time I thought it was tobacco (This was after all the D.A.R.E training too). Letting the government teach you your morales and philosophy is a thing that sheep do. Don't be a sheep.


Where Would We Be Without The Kindness Of Strangers

I used to think people on welfare and state assistance just weren't trying hard enough. I grew up spoiled and entitled and it seemed like any kind of charity was a stigma.

Then, my husband became chronically ill, and the economy took a shit. My family has been close to homelessness more than once, and have relied on state insurance and assistance off and on throughout the past few years. There are definitely people out there who abuse the system, but some just get stuck in a horrible cycle of poverty.

I also work in a school that has a high number low income and refugee families. It has really opened my eyes to the struggles that some people face.


He's Still There For You, The Best He Can Be

I could go through life and could seek meaningful advice from my Dad who has always been there for me.

Now he has been reduced to a feeble condition, I am starting to understand I'm out there on my own, and even what he's sure of is suspect given his mental and physical facilities have been rapidly deteriorating in his late seventies. I feel horrible that I have noticed this long before he did - or at least admitted as much.


Clear Your Mind

This was before I received an ADHD diagnosis. When my doctor referred me to an ADHD specialist, first of all I refused to believe him and was kind of slighted that he even suggested that I could possibly have ADHD.

I had a very strong opinion that if I get a diagnosis that I would refuse to take prescribed amphetamines because they are "bad" and "addictive" and that they would ruin my life.

Then I actually tried the prescription and it was like magic.


Going Through The Whole Spectrum

Used to be fairly open with my views on immigration policy. Then I worked for a while down near Corpus Christie doing immigration work. I'd say one out if every hundred people that came through our office was going to somebody who actually wanted to work and try to make a living here. So many people simply wanted to exist enough to get welfare. Many were young men who we would later defend against exportation as a result of their criminal activity. I began to despise the work of defending these men and wished they would be deported.

Now, I'm dating a foreign girl and we are in the legal immigration process. She has advanced degrees and skills, so that makes things a little easier. But it does make me resent people who just bypass the system. We can't bypass the system because I imagine my participation in immigration fraud could get me disbarred.


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