Stories > Society

People Share The Most Unique Baby Names They've Heard -- And We'd Like To See Some ID

What's in a name? For these kids, a lifetime of questions, like where the name "Tuba Poo" came from. There are some strange ones out there. Whyyyyyyy?

Frasepalm asked Reddit: What baby name immediately makes you lose all respect for the parents and why?

Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.


Globes are our friends.

One time when I was working at a motel, I took a reservation over the phone from a woman for her daughter:

Woman: Her name is Sri Lanka, S R I space L A N K A...

Me: Oh, you mean like the country!

Woman: Whaddaya mean, country?!?

DarthGandhi

How does someone manage this???????????

ULTRACHEESE-

My brother, a teacher, has a "Success."

I've taught:

  • Precious
  • Princess
  • Righteousness
  • Blessing
  • Pious
  • Destiny
  • Sincere

alialibobali

Righteousness? Why would you do that?

poptartsandoatmeal

I taught a few of those... and ShaNautical and ShaCorya (names after her dad Cory, of course).

howthebrainloves

Those poor kids.

I was on a little league baseball team with these two brothers named Doer and Achiever.

Talk about pressure to perform, those parents had expectations.

IAmDrinkingIcedTea

In Freakonomics there's a story of two brothers called Winner and Loser. Feels bad, but Winner ended up in jail and Loser became a cop.

zarazilla

Love it.

I was once checking in a customer for service.

EmoChanel

And she was very proud of it.

Hysteria878

I didn't know Chanel had an Emo line. 2005-me would have so identified with that.

kplatinum777

Why though?

Names with unneccessary letters or the rarely-seen, lack of necessary letters:

Jaiymes

Jaxn

Khaydence

Aayden

YoureNotAGenius

Haha I work with a guy named Aron. We all call him One-A-Ron

a_spooky_ghost

As if telling them apart weren't hard enough...

I know some twins named Jeffrey and Jeffroy and it's just lazy.

lilhomiesexual

My parent regret named my brother and I names that start with the same letter, but twins with functionally the same name would be horrible.

Pulsar_the_Spacenerd

When you want your kids to be a theme. 

The overly matchy names to the point of ridiculousness. My top example is a set of brothers named Romance, Romantic, and Romeo.

whateverreddit88

Knew a family with Hunter, Fisher, and Ryder.

boredtxan

I know one with Gunner, Fisher, and River

Other names in the family: the father's brother's name with "Ann" added to the end to make it a girls name, and the 5th one is just the fathers name (+Junior.) Mom is pregnant now with #s 6 and 7

philosiraptor

I knew one with River, Meadow and Autumn. Separate family but this one kid was called Blade.

Awkwardsam

Come on now.

Any "creative" spelling of a normal name. Like spelling:

Zoe-Zoi

Charles-Sharlz (yes I know one)

And so on.

bluecartoons

Isaac spelled Yxyc. A friend who teaches God that one in her class one year.

Edit: got... But I'm leaving the autocorrect because amusing

Maeven2

I have an uncle Isaac that is spelled Yssaq. He came here from Afghanistan in the 70s though, so at least that makes sense.

Salty1997

What a carry.

Prancer and Vixen for babies born during the Christmas season.

Back2Bach

Vixen just sounds way too much like a pornstar name.

el_pobbster

It's actually pronounced like the German word "wichsen" which is a common rude word for jerking off.

ExcellentCornershop

There's a fairly common last name of Semenyuk that never fails to make me smirk.

Spock_Rocket

Wichsen Semenyuk.

somewhereinthepines

Oh Natalie.

I used to write on cakes, the worst name I ever saw was "Tuba Poo". I asked if it was a nickname, it was not. It's been like 6 years and it still haunts me. Her mother's name was Natalie, why Natalie? Why?

jackiekackie

Damn Natalie, you crazy.

Sublime_Insanity

Big Bible fail.

My sister-in-law named her kid after the land of Canaan (biblical reference). For those not in the know, it's pronounced "cay-nin", or "cay-nun." She decided to pronounce it "cannon" ("Canon").

Not only is she one of the least Christian people I have ever met (who adamantly says she follows the Bible), she also consciously chose a well-known name and purposely mispronounced it for her kid's name.

Edit: my wife just reminded me that not only did her sister do the above, she also chose to spell his name "Kanann."

ryanjoachim

This is made worse when you consider that the land of Canaan is named for Ham's son that was cursed into slavery after Ham (Noah's son) looked upon Noah's drunken nakedness.

EelsInAHovercraft

Ugh, really?

So my Wife was giving birth to our first Son and the midwife asked if we'd chosen a name yet. We said yes and told her 'Seth'. She replied "Oh thank goodness, a normal name! The last woman in here named her child Precious Bunny!"

luc122c

After finding out I was having a boy my OB asked if we'd chosen a name, and I said "yes, his name is Owen." She let out a huge grin and said "oh, a name I can spell! I love those."

cgyates345

Let's hope it works out better for the kids.

My cousin named her son named Lincoln, which isn't bad by itself.

At least until she had her daughter, Kennedy. She said she plans on naming her next kid Garfield.

She literally names her kids after the last names of assassinated presidents.

Aldo13

I think she wants her kids to be assassinated.

PhantomHeroine

Plot twist: She wants her kids to be assassins.

RedNoodleHouse

"Go son, and avenge your namesake."

KeybladeSpirit

Poor dear.

Back when I worked with children, I met a young lass named Younique. I felt sorry for her. She was only 4-5 at the time, and the moment she entered school, she began to hate it because the other children thought that it was silly and wouldn't play with her. Eventually, the dad of another child said that it was a bad name to her face. Seriously. Don't do things like this to your children. They aren't pets. They'll have to deal with the repercussions of your bad naming choices.

Sebaren

Who names their kid after a sh*tty MLM?

hydrogen_bromide

They're not all bad.

Cutsey names.

Actually had a student named Justin. Last name Thyme.

SimplyTennessee

There's a guy who won American Idol/ X Factor called Phillip Phillips.

leaveleavesalone

Jimmy Hendrix Experience's drummer, Mitch Mitchell.

gorilla_bezoar

Rams safety, John Johnson III, not only was he given this name, but his grandparents and parents as well.

123full

What's the wildest baby name you've ever seen?

If you've ridden in a convertible with the top down, or on a motorcycle with a helmet with no face plate, you've probably gotten a bug caught in your throat at some point. Usually, though, you cough and sputter for a bit and the ordeal is over and done with. Sometimes things don't go so smoothly.

Reddit user LucasTheBrazilianGuy shared his epic tale of mental and physical injury at the hands (feet?) of a mere insect.

Fair warning: this one is fairly graphic, and definitely nightmare fuel for anyone who doesn't like insects (and even if you do).

This story has been edited for content and clarity.

Keep reading... Show less

But my soul is pure....

No matter who we love.... our significant others, or agents, our clients, fans or loved ones... it's never enough! And artists need the validation. That validation will help change the world. We're all trapped in moments but when we're most lucid we can change humanity! We should never fear the things we believe in; especially if it leads to progress.....

Redditor u/spankthewhitewhale wanted to unburden a few feelings by asking.... What comes across as selfish but actually isn't?

Keep reading... Show less

Human history is pretty cool. We document ourselves in all kinds of different ways, whether it be through art, or architecture, or stories--museums exist to preserve these artifacts of the human race. One day, we might find things we know well in a museum.

Keep reading... Show less

What is the hallmark of your creed? By that, we mean--each and every person has their own set of values and rules to live by. Those things define our choices, and therefore, those things define us.

Keep reading... Show less

Fate is fickle, and bad things seem to happen for no discernible reason. Sometimes, though, things just barely avoid going horribly wrong.

Keep reading... Show less