People Share The One Thing They Pretend To Enjoy But Secretly Can't Stand.

This article is based on the AskReddit question "What do you pretend to enjoy to 'keep the peace' but secretly can't stand?"

[Source can be found at the end of the article]

25. Her favourite perfume

My wife has the worst taste in perfumes. i mean terrible.

Whenever she picks out perfume it makes her smell like a 75 year old church lady.

It's always been this way. we've been together for 24 years. I've talked to her about it several times but she just will not catch on to the fact that her perfume gives me the sex panther reaction. I've bought her perfume but it actually disappeared and Geriatric Flower Musk comes back with a new label. She's so excited when she finds a new one it just breaks my heart when she sprays out the scent of quilting bees and funerals for my approval. I don't give her my approval, and I make her roll the window down in the car, but I try not to cough and run away when she puts some on.


24. Snacking in bed

My wife eats her bedtime snack in bed and she sounds like a old garbage disposal with glass and the bones of small children in it.


23. Old peoples entertainment

Gameshows. I live with my 66 year old dad, 82 year old great uncle and 87 year old grandmother.

So. Many. Gameshows.


22. The electronics-loving gay friends

Hanging out with my wife's LGBT friends during college was always a drag. Not because they were gay, but because being gay was all they seemed able to talk about. It was just always incredibly boring.

Except for the two nerdy dudes who hosted their own Minecraft server and liked to talk about computers and electronics with me. You guys made those gatherings at least bearable and I hope you're both still banging each other right now.


21. Dads sense of smell

My Dad's cooking. He doesn't have a sense of smell or taste so everything he makes is seasoned way too much or not at all. It's awful. It's never a "is it good?" It is always "So, how bad is it?


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20. *Fake smiles*

Mediocre food at a restaurant when everyone else is enjoying themselves. When someone else says their food is good, I just keep the thought "This food is terrible" to myself


19. That wonderful time of the year

My mother in law makes us dress up in matching outfits to decorate the Christmas tree, listen to Christmas music, and play Christmas-related games she's invented. We also have to ride on a sleigh to cut down the tree. It's a pretty major ordeal that takes the entire day, and I'm not even really Christian (though I'm not against Christianity or anything!)

It means a lot to her, though. I don't get it, I never will, but it means everything to her for some reason. So I pretend I love the entire thing. Sometimes her Christmas games can be cool I guess, in all honesty.


18. They ruined it!

Visiting my husband's parents. I used to love visiting his parents, then one of them went off their rocker and tried going cross country to have sex with someone in every state, then came home. Now you can always tell they were just fighting and won't even look at each other.


17. Unacceptable!

My mother's health obsession. She's constantly telling me how I'm gonna die for half the choices I make and controlling what I eat to the best of her ability. I pretend I'm fine with it and order pizza on the weekends and gasp wear deodorant before I'm about to go somewhere. I will also get all the vaccinations I need when I'm older because I live in fear of getting a deadly disease and hearing,"This could have been prevented by the vaccination.


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16. Just smile and wave

Whenever my sisters come over they try to spruce my place up and always give me backhanded comments hinting why my apartment isn't perfectly clean. I just smile and wave.


15. Husband of the year!

Cuddling. My wife loves it. She is extremely affectionately needy so I give it to her, but Jesus Christ it's boring as hell. Just laying there, not doing anything but holding each other. I don't mind cuddling at night when I'm trying to go to sleep, but she sometimes wants to just lay in bed in the middle of the day on the weekend and snuggle. She knows I hate that, but I'll do it for a while just to please her.


14. Lets see what happens

Whenever someone wants to take the lead on fixing something in a social setting. I work in IT and am pretty intuitive in general, and half the time I might actually be able to help. But I know some people have their pride about these things, so I'll just watch and wait.


13. At least the dogs are there for comfort

Murder crime shows or movies. My wife loves them and I just...meh? I like SVU a lot, but even that I can't watch non-stop. But I hate almost all others.

But, I'll just play on my phone, cuddle the dogs, or whatever while she watches them.


12. Is it okay to pretend forever?

The decision to have kids one day.

If I state that I don't want any everyone always has to know how dare I not want them or tell me ill change my mind one day. My partner and I don't want kids. We had a nice chat with each other and agreed we are on the same page. Besides the fact that there is too much wrong with me genetically and health wise we both just don't want them or like them. But somehow I have to suddenly develop this child wanting desire because of my gender. So I pretend to like kids and think they're cute when it's the exact opposite in my mind.

But most of society likes them so I must pretend I like them too. I sometimes wonder how many other people don't like or want kids and just pretend to like and want them.


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11. What a wonderful message!

My mother-in-law. I was done after she gave me a purse for Christmas that had dead cockroach limbs everywhere inside it. I'm all for vintage, but really? Plus she's a meddlesome, manipulative, conniving woman who tells us on the daily that we're raising her granddaughters wrong and we need to act quick before "Satan wraps them in his embrace of evil forever. Exact words in an Easter card.


10. Eat or starve. Your choice.

My husband's family has really weird taste in food, so anytime we are going to a holiday gathering with them, we pre-game the meal at home with our own food, then load up small plates with absolute unrelated nonsense and circulate the room dropping tidbits in the garbage anytime we're out of line of sight.

I'm talking mountains of off-brand hummus with off-brand stale cheese crackers, boiled but unseasoned meats COLD, 500000 veggie chips with a single thimbleful of dip, random heaps of vegetables with no serving spoon, individual containers of already-dressed salad with no explanation what's involved in the salad, and no menu coordination whatsoever. THEY don't even seem to like the food, as we are the only ones who get plates of it. I really don't understand the whole process but I'm not really invested enough to try to get to the bottom of it.


9. Best to expand vocabulary

Swearing. Not because I think it's inappropriate, but that it's not very expressive or clever. I don't get why profanity is worshipped so much when in actuality, the idea of using a random word out of context to emphasize whatever you're talking about is kind of dumb. But so many people think it's cool, and this viewpoint is weak, that I just shut up about it.


8. The downside of some friendships

My friend groups sense of humor outside of jokes. Sometimes when we're bored we'll plug In a chrome cast and watch a bunch of YouTube videos. Besides me and my best friends videos, 90% of them were mine craft animations and video game song parodies and I was just blown away over how cringey half of these were; especially since I've known these kids for years and we're all in college.


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7. Some habits stay with you

Eating at a dinner table. I know it's a normal thing to do but something really bothers me about hearing people eat and having others watch me eat.. and also having to talk and try to rapidly clear my mouth of food when someone asks me something. Also I forced to finish my food when I was a kid and we weren't allowed to laugh or joke at the table. It was uncomfortable and awkward so now I avoid it in my own house. But I understand the need to do it from time to time.


6. Helpful father

When my dad tries explaining something to me..

you have no idea how long it takes for him to explain..

once I asked him "How do you work out the area of this?"

Took us an hour of going through every little thing including how to multiply mentally (I was 12)

Now, I mostly study before he gets home from work so I can avoid the extra long lectures.

I know hes trying to help, which is why I just go along and let him explain.


5. Move out already!

My cousin used to work for my dad as his secretary. Back in 2010, he had to let her go because the market was so bad. Shortly after, she foreclosed on her house. My dad has a heart of gold, so he allowed her and her long-term boyfriend, and their 3 kids to stay in the basement of his house while they got back on their feet.

This was shortly after my mom died. My older sister and I were gone at college and my two younger sisters and him were in a big house all alone. It was pretty depressing. They moved in and brought life into the house. However, this was nearly 7 years ago now and they're still there. They don't pay a dime in rent, live like absolute hoarders. My little cousins sleep in a single bedroom (one a freshman in highschool). They hardly contribute to the house, and refuse to pay for a storage unit, so all of their things are spread throughout the basement, porch and kitchen.

I act like it's a great time when I go over there, but couldn't be more annoyed at how lazy and complacent they are.


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4. Stranger danger!

Conversations with people I meet at the bus stop.

Just because we see each other every day for fifteen minutes doesn't mean I like you. I don't mind questions about directions or when the bus is coming, but I do not like small talk, and I don't care about your life. I just want to sit and daydream/read until my bus gets here.

The worst part is that once they start talking, they take that as permission to talk to me every time.


3. The dream interpreter

When someone tells me about a dream they had. It's usually some weird far fetched story that drags on forever with no point. They usually include all the various tiny details that make the dream weird or strange to them and expect me to find it interesting. They expect you to have some explanation for why they dreamt they were eating ice cream with an elephant in a submarine.


2. Couldnt care less

Being a bridesmaid. Don't get me wrong I love my friends and my sister-in-law, I'm just not the most overtly female person in the world and I really enjoy my spare time without having to fake caring about which flowers I like more, and which hairstyle and shoes look the best.


1. As long as brother is happy

My sister in law. My brother works hard and brings home >$200k a year but she's always complaining that her friend's husband earns more. When he comes home from work, he does the cooking, dishes, bathes the kids, and put them to sleep while she's on her butt watching TV and her reasoning is she had to watch the kids all day so she deserves some rest. And by "watch the kids all day", she means that she dropped them off and picked them up from daycare/montessori. Weekends, he does the chores and she doesn't want to hire a housekeeper because she doesn't want a stranger in her house touching her things. I brought it up a couple of times during the few rare times I was able to have a small drink with him, but he absolutely hates the conversation and uses bad logic to defend his wife. He acts so positively about it, but I have a feeling he's already dead inside. So I don't bring it up anymore and smile when I see her.



"It wasn't me!"

There's not much you can do when the righteous fist of the law comes down on you. Call it a mix-up, or call it a mistake, if someone's pegged you at the scene of a crime there's not much you can do but trust the justice system to prove you innocent. However, that's a gamble, and just because you've been given a "not guilty" doesn't mean the effects won't follow you for the rest of your life.

Reddit user, u/danbrownskin, wanted to hear about the times when it wasn't you, seriously, it was someone else, when they asked:

Redditors who were once considered suspect of a crime they did not commit, what's it like being held under suspicion and how did it affect your life?

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