People Share The One Thing They Were Definitely Not Supposed To See.

Ever stumble across something or overhear a conversation that you know you shouldn't have?

Below are 31 of the wildest stories about just that. Check them out!

As a middle schooler, I picked up a book at the library, flipped through the pages and found an application for a replacement birth certificate for some old man. It had every detail about his personal identification on it, so naturally I took it home thinking, "I'll just hold onto this incase I ever need to assume a fake identity by pretending to be an 80 year old man and flee the country."

My mom found it and had to explain to me that no we don't steal people's identities.

Giphy


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I was working part-time at a library for a school subject. One day, they made me enter the data for new books into the library's computer system. As I worked, I did something (don't know what), that made Windows Outlook display onto the PC screen, along with some e-mails by the librarian's director to my teacher and to the other librarians. The e-mails basically said that I was really good at my job and very hard-working, and that the collaboration would be very beneficial both for me and them.

I wasn't supposed to read those messages, but they made me feel really happy.

Giphy


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When I started a new job, someone had left a bunch of HR files on the computer I was given. I opened one up, not sure what it was, and I got to see every employee's salary in the company. Even the CEO. The next day, it was gone. My boss realized his mistake and logged in to my system and deleted the files.

It was a memorable experience.

Giphy


Source

So I'm fresh out of school and taking a gap year before starting university. I'd managed to get a job working for the USAF at an airbase in the UK (details of the job aren't important).

So, about 2am on this particular night in early 1988 the runway lights that are normally off come on briefly, for perhaps 30 seconds then go off. That's when I hear something clearly landing on the runway and off to the right of the runway one of the larger hangars opens its doors. In the pitch black, the light from that hangar is quite spectacular. That's when I see it, a small black triangular aircraft rolls straight into that hangar and within seconds the doors close behind it.

This was my honest thought when I saw that, "I was DEFINITELY not supposed to have seen that." I put my cigarette (hey, I was young and dumb) out and walked back into my building.

A few weeks later we got our first pictures of the F-117 Nighthawk followed by a confirmation it existed. I smiled a little and thought to myself, "Already knew about that..."

Giphy


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I was about 8 or 9 and my parents were going to be out of town so they had me and siblings stay with a family from our church. Once we got to the house, they had one rule, you can play wherever you want but the basement is off limits. I was snuck down there first chance I got and was supremely disappointed to only find rows and rows of plants growing under lights.

Giphy


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Ben Affleck's social security number.

Years ago I was working for a company that I could access different departments' server files in. I was bored one day and was poking through those files to see what else the company had going on. I found a contract for a production deal with Ben Affleck, and his SSN was included (for payroll purposes). I closed the file because I knew I should not have been looking at that, even if it was accessible.

Giphy


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When I was little, my father set a password on a computer I was using for playing games. I wanted him to type the password (while I was away), but set a camera to record it. Hid it behind a pile of books.

The trick was, the camera back in the days was only able to record for 30 seconds, so I had to call my father and run out of the room, so he could type it as quickly as possible. It stopped filming just as he hit 'Enter'.

Giphy


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When I was about 5, my mom took me to the bank because she needed something out of the safety deposit box. It was right when they were opening up. They asked us to turn around while they unlocked the vault, but I peeked. According to family lore, I went around the rest of the day chanting the numbers of the combination.


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I was driving from West Berlin to West Germany in the late 1980's. My boyfriend gives me wrong instructions so I have to take an exit off the Autobahn to turn back and get back to the correct exit.

On the small country road on which we found ourselves, we see a large truck with a missile on it, surrounded by Russian soldiers.

They were as surprised as we were, but just laughed and waved at us, as we got the hell out of there as quickly as possible.


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I used to work nights at a manufacturing plant. I went to the bathroom one night, picked out my favorite stall and sat on the toilet to spend the next 10 minutes contemplating life. After a few minutes, a male janitor walked in and started cleaning the bathroom. Another minute later, another male janitor came in to help. They were talking to each other in Spanish and then started kissing near the sinks, not realizing anyone was in the bathroom.

I just sat there silently for a while not knowing what to do. After another minute or two of heavy kissing between the two, I decided to make a few noises so that they knew they weren't alone. My toilet seat creaked when I moved. They both stopped their romance session, looked at my stall, giggled, and ran out of the bathroom leaving all of their cleaning stuff behind. I quickly cleaned up, flushed and ran out. I actually never saw those same janitors again.


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When I was about 4-5 years old I watched Eddie Murphy: Raw in its entirety around the corner from the living room while my parents were watching it. I was super quiet and they were laughing their butt off so they didn't notice. I learned all sorts of cool new words!


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One Christmas Eve, I couldn't sleep at all so I went to the kitchen to get some water or something and out in the living room were my parents setting out presents and eating the cookies I had left out. They said that Santa was running late and was in such a big hurry that he just dropped off the presents and asked them to put them out for him.


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I was a contractor in Afghanistan working at Jalalabad air field. I woke up to take a piss and gave a cigarette. On the other side of the runway I saw a few helicopters take off but didn't hear anything. I thought it was strange as the base was dead silent but didn't think too much about it.

It was only later when I read the news that it was the SEAL team raid to kill bin Laden.

Because of my pea sized bladder I was probably the first non military or government person to see those stealth helicopters.


Source

Went to a co-workers house to help get the scanner to work, which hasn't worked since her daughter had tried to use it a few days earlier. I tried to load the software, which would hang while trying to connect to the scanner.

A quick power cycle of the scanner, and the software loaded. The software defaulted to the "recent scans" screen. The most recent scan was the genitalia of my co-worker, her daughter or I suppose it could have been a page from a XXX magazine that just happened to be exactly what you'd see if you were squatting over a scanner.

My hotkey skills were fast, so I may have Alt+F4'd before she saw what I did, but once that software worked, I used a different program to perform a test scan.

Easy, but uncomfortable way to earn $20.


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I got married towards the end of law school, and after graduating stayed with my parents for a few months while I prepped for the bar exam. My wife and I were fooling around, when my then-18-year-old brother opened the door and walked in to a perfect shot of us both spread eagle, touching each other's bits.

That was the last time that door went unlocked.


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I worked at a fancy health food restaurant years ago. One day I was early and saw the owner mixing his homemade cold pressed garlic aioli, it was Sysco mayonnaise and a big jar of minced garlic.


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My boss forwarded me an email telling me to do something. I noticed the email chain had his bosses on it so I read through the chain. They had asked him to rate all my co-workers and I from best to worst earlier in the conversation.


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When I was about 5 years old, my family went on holiday to this villa in the middle of nowhere. We could only stay downstairs, upstairs was strictly off limits. But me being young and stupid decided to look upstairs. I looked through the keyhole and it was really strange, there were a couple of men in suits and some weird control panel thing. I've never told my parents what I saw, but it still creeps me out to this day.


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Freshman year of college, walk into the kitchen area late at night and there's my girlfriend sitting on the counter, making out with one of my good friends. I just left quietly without them noticing and cut off all contact with both of them. So, pretty sure I wasn't supposed to see that.


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I learned at 6 that Santa was not really bringing me presents when I had my door cracked open on Christmas Eve and saw my dad and my cat wrestling with a present that my dad was trying in vain to get out of my cat's clutches. The scratches down his arm the next morning confirmed that it wasn't a dream. Sassy never took crap from anyone, though.


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A long time friend of mine's dad was showing me pics of a car he was restoring. He accidentally pulled up nude pics of my friend's mom instead. He looked awkward for a minute. He never said anything and then just started looking at car pics like it never happened.


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My 6 year old cousin asked me if I wanted some chewing gum. I said sure, if she has some. She then goes to her mother's purse and takes out two packages of condoms and asks me: What do you want, strawberries or banana?

Next thing I know, I'm shoving Durex packages in her mother's purse saying "We should firstly ask your mom before going through her things". So the kid doesn't stop here, she takes the purse, goes in the kitchen where all the family was reunited and asked her mother: Mom, can I have some gum?" Her mom says she doesn't have any. The freakin' girl takes the condoms out of the purse and says: Sure you do, I want the strawberries ones please.


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I saw an employee's check stub that he dropped. He had been there for a month and was making what I made after my first year and was not a very good worker. I got a raise.


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About 9 years ago, there were a couple of notes scattered across the computer desk in my parents' study. I happened to read them because words are in front of my face, what am I gonna do?

They were notes my parents had written each other instead of just talking to each other.

Because my dad had been with 14 sex workers.


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Saw a Homer Simpson keychain in my mom's desk drawer. Didn't say anything.

Two weeks later its in my Christmas stocking and she goes "Wow, how did Santa know how much you like the Simpsons".

Thats how I figured out Santa must've been sleeping with my mom.


Source

Our cat was a little late coming home one evening (unusual for him).

I went looking for him, calling his name, not massively loudly as it was late at night in a built up area.

As I walked around a corner to a car park, there he was. He looked like he was just having a bit of a chat with a fox. They looked relaxed, facing each other, sitting and chilling out.

I called his name and he looked at me, seemed flustered, looked back at the fox then me almost as if he was saying 'he's not with me, I don't know him'.

I called him again and he chased the fox into the bushes before trotting over to me.

I'm sure I crossed an animal 'line'.


Source

Beavis and Butt-Head Do America.

My parents found out we went into that theatre and they dragged us out REAL quick.


Source

Growing up with my little brother and single Mom we never had a lot, but she made sure we always had a safe and decent place to live and there was always food on the table. She never really ate much, I remember dinners of baked chicken, beef stew, salmon (it was a lot cheaper a million years ago). Good food, nothing terribly extravagant, but always nutritious, yet she barely ever ate. When I was 10 I saw her eating PB&J on crackers in her room after dinner. That's when I realized there was never enough food for all 3 of us, she would cook what we had for my brother and I and she would eat the bare minimum, always out of sight, so that my brother and I wouldn't worry about the actual level of poverty we were at. I never asked for another material thing from her after that night.

Source

Went to visit grandma and grandpa. The front door was locked so I went around through the back and found them gardening totally naked.


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When I was 14 and friend hosted a birthday party at his house with all the parents invited. Needed to use the restroom but the main one was occupied so my friend told me I can use the one in his mom's bedroom. As I walked up to the door I could hear somebody in there so I decided to wait until whoever was in there was finished.

A good ten minutes later, my friend's mom (who was hosting the party) and another good friend's step-father walk out and see me standing there all confused. They asked what I was doing there and I just said I was waiting to use the bathroom. Surprisingly they played it cool and just said I can use it now and walked off.

Giphy


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Some sort of spy-level information swap.

A couple of years ago I was sitting on a bench in a really busy shopping street just having a drink and just watching people basically.

At some point a man and a woman, both dressed really classy (that kinda stood out for me) came walking down the street, both from opposite directions and almost brushed each other when passing by.

In a split second I saw the woman passing a note (at least it looked like paper to me) to the man. They never looked at each other, didn't slow down their pace, changed posture, facial expression or anything. Just walked straight ahead on their way casually.

Just when they passed each other she slipped a note in his hands, really fast and stealthy.

Whatever it was it was pretty obvious that those two weren't meant to be seen together, the meeting was pre-arranged deliberately on a really busy spot and whatever they swapped was secret.

I'm very sure I wasn't supposed to have seen that and I probably was the only person who saw that.


Source

Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like

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My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308

Saturdays

My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango

Iraq

I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina

$40

With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3

Crayons

Giphy

I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold

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Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.


I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-

Tomash

Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.


An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451

Microwaves

Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence

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How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster

Colorblind

My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"

"orange"

"YOU CANT EVEN KNOW"

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?

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I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)


The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.

fox_boi2

Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.


I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.

grumblecakes1

Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

Dskee02

Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.

justantherredditgirl

Jewish

Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.

Aslkurloz

Nutella

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3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.

vault_tec_redditor

Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.

Meh75

Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.

weirdatwork2017

Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.

Frisby2007

Telekinesis

My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.

dude_bizarro

Ghosts

How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).


How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.

thebeststory

Dogs and Chocolate

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I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.

KlutzyHedgehog

Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.

SFCopperhead

Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.

SirRogers

Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.

MistalQueensglaive

Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.

BugsRatty

Stars In Their Multitude

Giphy

I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.

theedjman

Colorblind

My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

droneb2hive

Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.

moniker5000

Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...

10d4plus8

Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.

ScreamingPotoo