People Share The Wildest Things They've Said After Waking Up From Anesthesia.
Everyone has seen the amazing viral videos where people wake up from being under anesthesia saying the most bizarre things.
Here's a list of people confessing the most embarrassing things they said after waking up.
Many thanks to all the Redditors who responded. Check out more answers from the source at the end of this article!
35. Awwww poor lil sock :(
When my buddy woke up from anesthesia, he went to the bathroom and got dressed. His girlfriend heard him sobbing after being in the bathroom for 10+ minutes, and asked what was wrong.
He said, through tears, that he couldn't find his other sock. She laughed and told him she would find him more socks later. When they got home, he immediately crashed on the bed, and she took off his shoes so he could be comfortable...he had two socks on one foot.
34. I know you would have if you could have.
When I woke up, all the doctors were laughing. I was confused and asked what happened. Apparently when going under, I screamed "I will save JFK!" I don't even know.
33. I'll show you!
I recently had wisdom teeth out. I'm needle phobic, so I was terrified before going down. They gave me some gas and air, which wasn't really working. They then started pumping anaesthetic through, which made me decide I was feeling brave, so I told them to stop and go for the needle.
My last memory before blacking out was a Scottish nurse saying 'I'm not surprised you want us to try, you've had enough anaesthesia to knock most people out. Not that you'll remember this when you wake up'.
Well, I did remember, and upon coming round saw her across the room with her back to me. I decided to apologise for causing such a fuss, but it was a bit Austin Powers-esque and it turned out I was having some trouble controlling the volume of my voice. Thus, I ended up screaming 'SORRY!' from behind the poor woman, who dropped her papers, and nearly hit the floor in fright.
32. "Welcome to my butt!"
I was under some sort of anesthesia getting a colonoscopy when the proctologist called in several other doctors to get a look at something on the endoscope (?) screen.
When they came into the room I proudly announced in my best radio voice "Welcome to my butt!"
31. Wait wait... go back to the part with the pipe...
One time I went into the ER because I got hit in the head with a giant metal pipe. They had to give me a spinal tap to make sure my brain parts weren't bleeding. They gave me some kind of amazing drug through my i.v and I felt really really good.
The thing they clamp onto your finger for your pulse had a red light on it. I kept saying Ellliottt Ellliottt to the nurse (like ET) and the nurse had to leave the room because she was laughing so hard.
30. Trust me, that's just what it does.
A couple of years ago when I woke up after having my wisdom teeth taken out, I was freaking out because I was certain there was a sink that was somehow moving around by itself (I was under anesthesia), and the nurse finally calmed me down and told me not to worry by telling me that the sink always does that.
29. How literary of you...
I quoted Fahrenheit 451 according to my doctor. I was awake, but not really there, so he asked me who's the president, I answered Bush. Asked what state I was born in, I said "the state of innocence".
28. I love the "sort of".
A patient woke up singing and (sort of) dancing to 'love shack' by the B-52's. We all subsequently joined in dance.
27. What if...
A friend was walking me out of the hospital after a simple surgery. Supposedly I stopped in the crowded waiting room and asked loudly "What if this is as good as it gets?"
26. Or did he?
My brother was in tears talking about how his pet lizard died. He never owned a lizard.
25. Don't apologize. he needed a new pair anyway.
I kid you not I had this 6 year old kid coming out and he just screams "Mom I ate dads sweatpants I'm sorry!"
24. Not always so timid after all.
I woke up out of surgery twice, once was during my wisdom tooth removal. I groaned angrily at the surgeon for hurting me and he shushed me, and told me to go back to sleep, which I did immediately.
The second time was during my tonsil removal, I woke up, freaked out and vomited blood all over myself and the surgical staff. When they finished up and rolled me out of the OR my Mom was in tears frantic.
Turns out when they pushed the morphine and I was allergic, it woke me up, made me puke but didn't even offer any pain relief. I grabbed the nearby nurse's scrubs, pulled her down to my face level and screamed in her face to give me some pain killers. She said they gave me the maximum dose and it would kill me to give me more.
They had to have orderlies hold me down. I blacked out for a bit and woke up crying, blind, with blood being wiped out of my eyes. I kept fighting the nurses off in terror so they had to strap me down. The allergic reaction to the morphine caused my eyes to swell shut and I couldn't control my instinctual urge to scratch while sedated and nearly damaged my own eyes.
I'm a quite timid, 20 year old female from Canada. I was 18 when I had my tonsils removed.
After having my wisdom teeth removed, my mouth was full of gauze and blood. Talking was painful and very difficult. Still, I apparently managed to choke out how beautiful my nurses eyes were.
I'm pretty smooth.
My doctor said that I was singing show tunes. I guess one of the nurses tried to sing along and I stopped and told her she was singing flat.
21. Feed the dang chickens!
When my friend was having her baby, she was heavily medicated and kept yelling at everyone in the room "Get the chicken feed! The chickens are hungry! Feed them!"
Disclaimer: She does not now, nor has she ever lived in a farm.
20. Better out than in...
My dad's first colonoscopy, doctor had a new/learning/something female doctor with him. My dad couldn't hold the fart that he was apparently supposed to suppress. He let one rip, and heard the male doc say "This is why we don't wear nice shoes to work"
My dad pooped on the nice lady's shoes.
19. How can you lie on the bed if you're made of lasers?
Not a doctor, but when I underwent anaesthesia for surgery on a hernia, my surgeon told me that I said "You can't stop me; I'm made of lasers" as I fell asleep. Not only that, I said "We need more Monroe Doctrine people" when I started to wake up.
I'm very weird. Just ask any of my exes.
18. What noise, exactly?
After I came out of anesthesia following a colonoscopy, I apparently grabbed the nurse's hand and said very earnestly, "I don't ever want to drink that stuff again, okay? It sounded like I was making cappuccino in the bathroom."
Then I made the noise at her.
My husband said he was astounded that I said that because it's so unlike me, but when I topped it off by making the noise he was laughing so hard he could barely breathe.
17. Can I take a request?
Heard the heart monitor beeping, started smiling and humming and blurted out "TURN IT UP! I LOVE THIS SONG!!!" The doctor and nurses thought it was hilarious.
16. Well, that's quite a combo there.
After I got my wisdom teeth removed, I awoke to tell the dental surgeon how Batman and Catwoman should have "BatCat babies", and then I convinced my brother to take me shopping. I bought a Batman movie and men's dress socks.
15. I'm sure that's not true!
Waking up after an emergency c-section: "Water..." A split-second later: "Baby?!?" (Baby's fine.) "Oh god, I'm a terrible mother!" (for thinking of water first).
14. "I was screaming this all in German."
I had my sinuses and such fixed. I came out of surgery screaming at the doctor and nurses "You're not finished! You're not finished! I'm awake!" because apparently I watch too much tv and was horrified that I had woken up in the middle of surgery.
The catch? I was screaming this all in German. I was still better than the guy next to me in recovery who was convinced the oxygen mask was killing him.
13. I'm sensing the next big fashion craze.
When I went to get my wisdom teeth pulled, my mother was in the room with me when I was being put under. Groggily I told the doctors to keep my teeth and give them to me after the surgery. My mother asked, "What are you going to do with them?" I said, "I WILL MAKE A NECKLACE OF HUMAN TEETH", and cackled. She found this less amusing than I did.
When I woke up the doctors had put my blood-encrusted molars in a little plastic ziplock.
12. I would be...
I woke up from nasal surgery, I was telling the nurse all about how I forgot to unload the guns before putting them in the back of the van. She looked a tad terrified.
11. A baseball accident?
My cousin needed surgery after a baseball accident (he was 12 or 13 at this point) and he came out of the anesthesia and said "Mom...I'mma, I'm a...para...para....parallelogram."
10. Well... that's pretty rude...
Was getting a tooth removed, while the anesthesia was setting in I told the nurse to shut her mouth.
9. Can I? PLEEAASSEE!!??
One of my best friends woke up from his wisdom tooth removal begging the doctor to let him be David Bowie. The doctor actually asked how that was supposed to happen, and the answer was that "it would be fantastic."
Sadly I myself woke up alone, so nobody heard whatever I might've said.
8. Bring it here!
When I woke up from my wisdom teeth surgery with gauze in my mouth, I demanded a glass of water because I had "cotton mouth."
7. Use the force.
When I woke up from anesthesia from an appendectomy I loudly screamed that I was hot, stood on my bed and ripped my gown off while my entire family was there. I also demanded that I see Luke Skywalker because he knew what was wrong with me. This could be due to my surgeon's name being Mark Hamill.
6. Why don't you care?
When I came out of anesthesia from a surgery a couple years ago the nurse came over to check on me and I started telling her how awesome Duck Tales is. She gave me this sort of "Yeah, that's great" look and walked away.
I got really offended that she wasn't listening to me and started singing the Duck Tales theme song. "Duck Tales! Woo-hoo!"
5. That must be so painful.
Twisting a testicle is painful, like really painful, so I'd had morphine and gas and air, and after having emergency surgery I woke up a bit fuzzy headed, the doctor was there and I simply asked "Did you have to shave my balls".
Interestingly not only did they shave my balls but before my accident one ball was slightly lower than the other. They kindly levelled them out during the operation. So I basically got free plastic surgery on my balls.
4. That is technically true...
After my little brother came out of surgery, he said "we are not cat people".
3. Creepy as all heck!
Not a doctor yet but working on it. I checked up on this older lady who had a few things go wrong during surgery and had to be resuscitated and all, anyway, as soon as she's awake she tells me this "I went and saw my husband last night (he died 5 years ago!) and they're having such a nice place where he is now. It's really very comfortable and lovely.
He wanted me to stay with him but I told him I can't because I really want to see our grandson get married." It was creepy! Her daughter in law also works at the hospital and it's a small town so we all know each other and after a few weeks I asked how the lady is doing... apparently she passed away two days after her grandson's wedding...
2. Thank the lord you were wrong...
I was having surgery on my right leg, woke up in the middle of the operation and yelled to the doctor "what are you doing to my right leg it was the left leg" and felt back asleep.
After I came out from the surgery, the doctors told me that there was about 5 seconds of pure panic in the operating room and the doctor went pale as a sheet of paper.
1. What a perk!
My husband told me when I woke up from having my wisdom teeth removed, I was furious at the oral surgeon. I was attempting to yell at him him for taking MY teeth to put under HIS pillow and the Tooth Fairy was going to give HIM the money MY teeth had earned.
He patted his lab coat pocket and said, "Perks of the job, sweetheart." Must have been a good response, because my husband said I dropped it immediately.
Thumbnail Photo Credit: pathdoc / shutterstock
Fame always come with a price!
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