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People Share Their Brushes With Near Death Experiences--And We're Clutching Our Pearls

Death comes to us all - and we all cheat it at some point. I fell out of a stroller on a mall escalator once. Almost drowned in the ocean. Had 5 surgeries over a year. I just wish I'd had that special NDE...

Aiden_Tindale asked Redditors who've seen the brink: What was your near-death experience?

Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.


Death is nothing - but what is nothing?

Heart attack. I was in the observation ward when my heart rate began to drop. Since I was being monitored, an alert was sent to the nurses station. All these people came rushing into my room and I could hear someone counting down my heart rate -50-40-30. At 30 I looked over and saw the crash cart sitting in my room and I asked a nurse what that was for. She said "just in case". My response was "just in case of what". Then my heart rate hit 20 and I passed out. I was sure I was a goner as they counted me down. Weird thing is, I didn't feel any fear. It was almost like "oh well, I guess this is it". Woke up with 2 stents and a pacemaker. No angels, white lights or tunnels. I would say nothingness, but even nothingness wasn't there, if that makes any sense.

Slamdunkdink

Damn man... hope you're OK now, how is your life after this happened to you?

WolfieSobrado

Actually, really good. I had the HA 3 years ago. They told me I had to wait 6 weeks before going back to work, but I felt so good I went back after 3 weeks. It also motivated me to drop from 220 pounds to 160. I think the weight loss is responsible for my sense of well being. My cardiologist said that if I had been anywhere but in the hospital when my heart rate decided to drop, I probably wouldn't have made it. I was at my regular doc because I was having feelings of indigestion. When my doctor came into the waiting room, he took one look at me and said "you're have a heart attack". He told his assistant to call 911. The odd thing is my only symptom was the indigestion. No arm pain, no shortness of breath, no chest pain or pressure. Just mild indigestion. Two hours after being admitted to the cardiac ward, I had my HA. Apparently I had one very tiny artery partially block, but because it fed the area of my heart that regulated heart rate, I had problems. I woke up with 2 stents and a pacemaker. I'm very thankful, especially for my GP who was able to recognize that I was having a HA when I didn't. I did make a point of thanking him for saving my life, because he really did. I've had the same GP for 15 years.

Slamdunkdink

The relentless pursuit of getting laid. And it wasn't even worth it.

I was fifteen and full of hormones and bad ideas. Those two things are notorious in being the right ingredients for the perfect disaster. My girlfriend at the time missed me in the middle of a post St. Patrick's Day March night and wanted to see me, so I sneaked out. It was around the beginning of spring, so I underestimated how quickly the weather could change. I dressed lightly because it was really beginning to feel like spring and my desire to lose my virginity made me suddenly oblivious to the fact that she lived on a hill ten miles away in rural Northern Pennsylvania. As I rose in elevation, the inverse effect happened to the temperature, and I was too stubborn to turn around because I would be there "any second".

It turns out that I took a wrong turn, so I was completely lost and alone in a snow storm so dense that I couldn't see in front of myself. The scary thing was, I was quickly dehydrating and my clothes were getting progressively more soaked, and then my phone died. I wandered for what felt like hours, screaming for someone to help to no one in particular - it was all an idiot teenager could have thought to do.

I never did get help in the way that I had wanted. Instead, I saw a bright green light in the middle of nowhere, so I stumbled toward it with the rest of my energy and found myself at a glass door with a shamrock shaped light over it. I tried the door and... It opened. So I went in and collapsed next to the wood stove inside. I awoke to my clothes being dried and an older woman asking me if I wanted breakfast. I broke into this lady's house and she was asking if she could do anything for me. I was so lucky, and I thanked her every second that I could that morning. To get home, I helped her relatives down the road with some early morning manual labor, as they lived on a farm. Once I paid my way home, my mom whipped the ever-living sh*t right out of me for being so stupid. I won't deny that I deserved it, because I really could have died in that storm. Sometimes, fate just cuts us a break.

ClastAtSnowhead

She broke up with me. We almost did something at a mutual friend's house a few years later but we stopped when it became evident that she had a boyfriend.

ClastAtSnowhead

Hypothermia is definitely not how you want to go.

Not too far off from my closest brush with death.

I had a chance to see a girl I had a huge crush on. Drove 2 hours to have long meaningful conversations (not a euphemism, sigh) till 2 AM. I left super exhausted and drove for home. I wasn't familiar with the area, and this was before mobile navigation. I took a wrong turn and quickly got lost. I was too tired to make coherent decisions and realized driving was a bad idea, and looked for a place to pull off the road and take a nap.

This was winter in New Hampshire. I had dressed for freezing temperatures...from my car to her door. Fancy date shirt and a wool trench-coat (it was the 90s, don't judge). No hat, no gloves, no scarf. It was fine for 30 degrees.

While I was on my date, a cold front moved through and it dropped from 30 degrees to negative 14, not counting wind chill. As soon as I turned the car off, it got COLD, and I started shivering wildly. I knew leaving the car running while I slept was a good way to die of carbon monoxide poisoning, so I would run the heater, get the car as warm as I could, turn it off, and close my eyes to nap. When it got so cold that I started shivering, I would wake up, start the car, and turn the heater back on for a few minutes.

I had a few cycles of this, sleeping in 20 minute increments and waking up shivering. Then one time I cracked an eye open and noticed a good 40 minutes had passed. "Good!" I thought, "It must be warming up. I'm not shivering at all!". I was about to close my eyes again when I noticed frost building up on the inside of the window nearest to my head. I thought it was funny how much warmer I felt when my breath was still freezing on the inside of the car.

Then I remembered that one of the symptoms of severe hypothermia was a lack of shivering, and not feeling cold.

I started the car, and drove the rest of the way home on an adrenaline burst. I'm convinced that if I'd gone back to sleep I would have died.

BenderBluss

But was she drunk?

While I was checking inventory at a liquor store I worked at in college, a lady drove her car through the building in the exact spot I was standing. If I had been just 5 inches to the right, she could have pinned me to death between the shelving.

Literally experienced 1 of the 2 fears I had about working in the store. There's still a video of it.

Keachy_Plean

Are you able to release the video if you blur out the faces and license plate?

matthew5432104

The only person seen is me because it's from the inside of the store. https://youtu.be/T7JCNryMSHM

Keachy_Plean

Life can really turn on you.

Bad car accident.

A guy sent me into the divider, I flipped over while airborne, and landed straight up into oncoming traffic.

Thank god no other cars hit me. But the roof on the passengers side was completely caved in.

My friend was supposed to be with me that night.

Black__Mesa

This puts my 29-hour labor to shame.

During birth I got my foot hooked on moms ribcage and got stuck. Doctors could have killed us both if they weren't careful enough. 18 hours of labour for a total failure. Sorry mom.

Midnite_St0rm

Really tore her a new one, huh?

1bigredbug

Yeah, literally.

Midnite_St0rm

Kids are mean.

I honestly don't even remember it at all, but apparently I got into a big fight with this older kid at my elementary school. Knowing me, I probably said something stupid. Anyway, I'm in the 2nd grade, they're in 5th grade. I learned second hand that he tried to strangle me (guy had anger issues). We had s*** supervision on the playground and I have no idea how long the choking lasted. Kids told me that I had passed out and wasn't conscious for a while. I dunno the details myself. But, my voice was gone for what seemed like forever and sleeping was a pain because moving my neck sucked.

I'm not sure if that counts as "near death", but I'm pretty sure a 5th grader choking a tiny version of me could've killed me.

hepsy-b

Wait, could you actually not speak or was your voice just damaged?

Mariothemaster245

It hurt to talk because my neck was really bruised (or whatever it is that happens when some asshole kid chokes you). But, on that note, I did more or less become selectively mute after that once middle school came around. F*cking hated middle school, but at least no one ever tried to choke me.

hepsy-b

100% nope.

Grandmother was driving, turns out she had dementia which had escalated badly from the last time we saw her (we live in another country and she's cared by siblings) and we didn't know. She turned into oncoming traffic on the freeway and we only survived because the oncoming car was a fancy sports car with excellent breaks who only barely managed to stop.

deathbotly

This person is either a cat or is meant for greatness. Just like a cat.

I was the worst child. I have had multiple near death experiences, if it was up to natural selection I would be super dead.

First was drowning. I was on a baby floaty and had somehow managed to tip it over and my dad didn't notice because "there was a lady in a see through white bikini" talking to him. My mom says she could see just my little legs kicking in the air while the rest of my was under water, while she rushed out yelling at my dad to flip me back over.

Second one was drowning, and actually not my fault. I was pushed into a pool by an older man (I was a 3 year old at the time) I did not know how to swim and my mom was helping my brother. I was actually sorta dead at that point (not breathing).

Third was almost being squashed to death, my mom had a tv on top of a dresser with a cabinet the tv was inside of. I pulled the drawers of the dresser out to climb on them and the entire thing tipped over. The tv had moved just enough that I was not squashed. But still landed on my leg and broke it. I was 4 at the time.

And finally I was 8 years old and did a somersault off of the playground equipment while playing a game of grounders. I broke my collarbone, compressed my vertebrae and hit my head on the way down and was in a coma for 15 hours.

physicslover69

This future engineer.

When I was about 6 years old I was playing in my room with a metal toy airplane. Being a stupid six year old I had the great idea that if I wrapped a wire around the plane and put it in to the wall socket it might fly. I electrocuted myself horribly.

keeganjacksonca

I'm happy I learned this lesson with a small fan. For context when I was little I had this small fan I would take everywhere around the house during the summer because we were too poor for AC. The only issue was that the prongs has this tendency to bend out. Maybe I was just a stupid 4 year old and yanked the cord out all the time, I don't remember. But I want to plug it in, squeezing the prongs right because they were too wide to fit and pushed it in a little too far. All I got was a quick jolt and a vibrating feeling an I let go. I definitely cried after that.

That_Ganderman

Nope.

Went to these tidal pools in Oahu and made the climb down OK.

On the way back up however my group took a wrong turn and we ended up on a pretty steep cliff so we had to free climb back up to the road in flip flops while making our way through thorns and prickly brush. My flip flops broke midway so I was terrified that I was a goner.

I'll leave this on a cliffhanger to make you wonder if I survived or not.

jesuschin

Some say OP is still on that cliff...

CAN'T.... HOLD...ON...MUCH...LONGER

callmegecko

EEEEKKKK FINALLY A REFRENCE TO THAT!!!! * CLEARS THROAT *

*FIVE MEN ON HELICOPTERS FLY UP*

CLIIIFF HANGER, HANGING FROM A CLIFF!

AND THATS WHY HES CALLED CLIFF HANGER!!!!!

experiment1288

Did Sonny Bono teach us nothing?

TLDR at bottom

I was airboarding with some friends at my local Ski hill, montage mountain in Pennsylvania. It was getting dark out and we were gonna do our last run down the hill. I forget what happened exactly but I ended up going down the hill a minute or two later than my friends did.

On the way down the hill, because it was pitch black out and the trail was illuminated only by the spotlights placed on the side of the trail, I ended up nearly crashing into a skier in front of me that was wearing all black. Because he was wearing all black and it was dark out, I didn't see him until I was practically on top of him, and when I tried to lunge to the side to avoid hitting, I lost grip on my board and started tumbling down the mountain at ~30 mph.

After maybe 100 feet of rolling down the hill at high speed I slammed chest first into a boulder sized chunk of ice that had fallen from one of the posts holding the ski-lift up. After colliding with it at 30mph I slid across the ice for another probably 20 feet before coming to a stop in the middle of the trail. Thank god there was somebody stationed at a watch cabin right next to where I crashed, because if nobody had seen me crash, I could have laid there for several more minutes than I did, or god forbid somebody could have even crashed into me while I was laying there. I have no doubt that if I hadn't crashed right next to the watch cabin, I would have died, because nobody would have seen me.

I broke 9 ribs, punctured my left lung in 3 places, collapsed my right lung, got a stage 3 spleen laceration, and several vertebrae in my back were moved out of place. I spent 5 days recovering in the ICU and then an additional 4 days in the pediatric unit (I was 15 at the time) and wasn't able to return to school for another four weeks, and even after that was barred from participating in any physical activity for the next 3 months.

It was pretty traumatic, and I don't remember much of it. The few memories I have of it are just snapshot images I took mentally, and the sound that I made when I slammed into the boulder. After slamming into it I immediately realized that my lungs had collapsed, because for the next ~30 seconds I could not inhale, only exhale. As the air was forced out of my lungs, I made the most horrible wheezing sound I had ever heard, and the air that leaked into my body from my punctured lung made a crackling noise as it moved around in my chest cavity and neck, almost like someone crinkling paper or the sound that Rice Krispies makes as it snaps crackles and pops in the cereal bowl.

TLDR: Got into an air-boarding accident at my ski hill, broke 9 ribs, punctured one lung and collapsed the other one, got a stage 3 spleen laceration and several vertebrae were knocked out of alignment.

ccjjww99

Tell me the ski hill now demands some level of reflective kit at night now.

JT_3K

Nope. They didn't do jack diddly about it. What's seriously f*cked up is that while I was bleeding to death in the first aid bay waiting for the ambulance to arrive, the montage employees wouldn't stop asking me if I signed the waiver when I arrived. Eventually the nurse that was doing her best to stop the bleeding had enough and told the guy to shut the f*ck up, and that it won't matter if I signed the wavier if I'm dead. If I could have given that nurse a hug I would have.

ccjjww99

Airboarding sounds a lot cooler than what that actually is: sledding.

Dr_Herbert_Wangus

Lucky, lucky, lucky.

I was in a car accident, as a passenger in the backseat behind the driver. We were teenagers (not drinking, no drugs), and my friend, the driver tried to make a light that was already red and we got t-boned on the side I was on. (Dumb teenage invincibility)

No airbags in the backseat then, this was the 90's, and the front seat had broken and was laid on top of me, the side of the car was dented in and there was glass everywhere.

I must have passed out because all I remember is my three friends yelling at me from outside the car. I was pinned in, and couldn't get out.

Cops, fire truck etc came. I was completely calm, (shock), and really thought I was dying. Felt very peaceful and didn't feel any pain and closed my eyes as I was very drowsy from hitting my head.

Woke up as I saw a flash like something bringing me back to reality and then realized a saw was cutting off the top of the car to get me out. Full panic set it and I became hysterical and was in insane amounts of pain. Started crying and hyperventilating.

I remember this fireman who was probably 30 or 40, look down at me, grab my hand and started breathing with me to calm me down. He rubbed my arm, was very soothing and took my mind off the commotion around me. He stayed there with me while they cut out the hood and seat, and he lifted me out like I was a feather and got me stabilized on the stretcher with a neck brace. He came with me in the ambulance because whenever he left me my heart rate shot up and I started freaking out again. Once at the hospital they had given me sedation and when I awoke he was gone.

Never got his name, my mom called to find him so we could thank him and they said no one was with me, even though the paramedic confirmed he was in the ambulance with me. Thank you sir, you helped a frightened young girl through a horrific night.

And I had some major injuries but I was lucky as I had age and health on my side and I healed fast with physical therapy and positive thinking and was as good as new within a year.

Side note: I was brought to the hospital my mom worked at by pure luck as my other three friends were brought to the hospital close to us. The EMT actually knew my mom and bypassed dispatch to go straight to her hospital.

itsme1704

Drinking then driving is never worth it. Just don't.

When I was in high school, my friends and I were out on Halloween night in front of my house. There were 8 of us total, and three of us, including me sat on the bumper of my mom's car.

As we were talking, we heard screeching from a car turning onto our street. We ignored it, except for one friend (call him Joseph) who was sitting on the bumper. It was a weird screech, so he mimicked it and said "Sounds like Michael when my mom smacks him." Joseph and Michael are brothers, so Michael (older brother) chases after Joseph, who ran towards my backyard. As Joseph ran, he dropped his cellphone without noticing so I got up to grab it for him.

Seconds later, the car that we heard screech ends up ramming into my mom's car. Drunk drivers. They tried to run away, but both ended up breaking their legs in the impact.

Joseph's silly joke saved our lives.

Cudois47

This person survived a terrorist attack, so they win.

I'm not the best writer, but here goes:

I was studying abroad in the Netherlands in my third year of college and I was visiting London for the weekend back in June 2017. My plan was to stay in London for three days and then from there visit Paris. On my last night in London before taking the night bus to Paris I decided to visit the London Bridge.

I went with two friends and we went to the bridge and from there just hung out and took pictures. I was facing the outside of the bridge towards the water enjoying the view and I suddenly hear screaming and I turn around and see a van coming near me. I straight up flinch and back away as much as possible and the van zooms inches past me. At that point I froze just to make sense of what the hell happened, at first I thought it was some car accident. Next thing I know there's screaming everywhere, people are running, there's some bodies on the ground, it's absolutely mayhem. My friend starts yelling, "IT'S A TERRORIST ATTACK!", and from there we ran for our lives. (Later on I asked him about this and how he knew, he told me while my back was turned he saw the van purposely trying to ram people from where he was standing)

We had no idea what was going to happen, were they going to turn back around and try to hit more pedestrians? Come out and start shooting at us? The entire time I was thinking, "This is not real, this is not real". We made it off the bridge and managed to get back to the hostel. Later on we found out about the terrorist attack on the London Bridge that night. We were all pretty f*cked up. We cancelled out trip to Paris and went straight back to the Netherlands the next morning. Our respective home universities in the US found out, got us therapy at the school in the Netherlands we were all in. We're all ok now, but f*cking hell...

TL;DR: I was nearly rammed by terrorists driving a van in the London Bridge attack.

bowelmovement99

Wow, it's surreal to read about events in the news and then have someone involved come forward and share on this platform.

I hope you're keeping well.

Adithya_04

Holy f*ck, what a scary experience.

F1NANCE

What's the closest you've ever come to dying?

Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like

Giphy

My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308

Saturdays

My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango

Iraq

I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina

$40

With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3

Crayons

Giphy

I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold

Giphy

Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.


I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-

Tomash

Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.


An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451

Microwaves

Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence

Giphy

How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster

Colorblind

My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"

"orange"

"YOU CANT EVEN KNOW"

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?

Giphy

I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)


The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.

fox_boi2

Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.


I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.

grumblecakes1

Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

Dskee02

Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.

justantherredditgirl

Jewish

Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.

Aslkurloz

Nutella

Giphy

3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.

vault_tec_redditor

Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.

Meh75

Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.

weirdatwork2017

Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.

Frisby2007

Telekinesis

My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.

dude_bizarro

Ghosts

How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).


How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.

thebeststory

Dogs and Chocolate

Giphy

I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.

KlutzyHedgehog

Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.

SFCopperhead

Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.

SirRogers

Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.

MistalQueensglaive

Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.

BugsRatty

Stars In Their Multitude

Giphy

I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.

theedjman

Colorblind

My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

droneb2hive

Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.

moniker5000

Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...

10d4plus8

Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.

ScreamingPotoo