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People Share The Worst Thing A Therapist Has Ever Told Them

Therapists are supposed to help us, so why would do they do things like telling our parents what we've said? Or giving us advice that makes us feel worse? Or dismissing our pain as if it didn't exist?

mayonnaisethemusical asked: What's the worst thing a therapist/counselor has ever told you?

Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.


10. Wow, that's cold.

"I am not able to continue seeing you anymore because your mother thinks I am helping you too much."

She was my favorite therapist too and still to this day am upset at my dysfunctional mother for making me stop seeing her.

ItsPronouncedShy

Ugh, I'm so sorry. That sort of thing makes everything seem almost hopeless. A similar thing happened to me too. When I was younger, my mom made me stop seeing my therapist after my therapist suggested a therapy session with both of us (my mom and I). It was obvious my dysfunctional mom/home was the source of my problems, so she wanted to talk to my mom about things with me.

After that therapy session my mom told me on our way out, "You're done seeing her. I don't need someone telling me how to parent my child." Never saw her again, never was allowed therapy again.

Aconlanais17

Don't be sorry!

At times I feel like life isn't worth living then I realize I have few (but loyal) people to fight my demons for.

I always think to myself, I wonder who or what I'd become if I had different parents.


Your mom sounds exactly like mine. They never want to be the bad guy and if anyone tells her differently she'll make everyone's life a living hell. I hope you're becoming the person you want to be and don't let anyone tell you otherwise!

ItsPronouncedShy

9. Hope they lost their license.

When he broke doctor patient confidentiality and told my dad everything that I said in therapy.

Never see a shrink who is friends with your parents.

KeyScholar

If I'm not mistaken, that's license revoking stuff. Like you said already, that is a big f*cking no no in the medical world. Especially so in the context of therapy.

Magnus09

That's what I was going to say! Yes! Told my Dad EVERYTHING I said. Made my life 1000 times worse than what it was.... I trust no one anymore and that was 30 years ago.

NikkiPhx

Do you want millions of dollars in HIPAA fines? Because that's how you get millions of dollars in HIPAA fines.

mastigos1

8. The hell I do.

"You owe it to them." I had gotten out of an abusive relationship and they wanted to talk to me, but I was so traumatized I wanted nothing to do with them.

Wouldst-Thou-Like

Yeah no way. I'm not a therapist but I've had 2 over the last 4 or so years and BOTH have said "you and your health are my priority," I hope you're doing better now.

eventhestarsburn

I havent heard about them in a while, and I think they lost their license. I am doing better now, thankfully.

Wouldst-Thou-Like

7. Oh boy.

When I mentioned my uncle assaulting me, he airily waved a dismissive hand and with a bored expression said, "That's common, it happens to lots of girls" and moved onto a different topic.

Sometimes psychiatrists have to shine a light on our flaws and we may not like it, but if your therapist is insensitive or you just don't gel you can change therapists. Sometimes it takes several attempts to find the right therapist.

FloppyEaredDog

6. Tell me something I don't know.

".. Because you've failed as a man, you know that right?"

First meeting, 30 minutes in.

I've had it in mind to lodge a formal complaint.

giveer

I would file a complaint. People suffer and die in silence after attempting to get help and receiving that kind of trash from "therapists," and it keeps people from looking for actually competent providers.

sponge_cat

Well, the specifics are rather personal, but it was my intro appointment. 45 minutes where I discuss my situations, my days, my thoughts, my anxieties and basically bring him up to speed on why my doctor referred me to him (oh yeah, I skipped that part.).

So I was going through one of my personally upsetting stories and there was one detail that he couldn't seem to wrap his head around (I committed no crime, abusive, self-abusive or addictive habits), it was actually a detail that was done out of selflessness that some would consider thoughtful behavior, but he just couldn't seem to understand it. So he considered it to be indicative of being a failure and decided to tell me so.

A decade later, I stand by my behavior and personal morals, and don't regret them. It's where I was at the time. But his thoughts about it stuck. I've never crawled out of the hole I was/am in and having a "professional" inform you that you're a total failure after speaking to you for 30 minutes validates many of the destructive things I think everyday.

giveer

5. Like it's so easy *not* being a serial killer.

"Honestly, I'm surprised you haven't become a serial killer."

Yea, thanks assh*le.

EDIT: To add to this, I think it was well intentioned. I have had a lot of sh*t in my life, and a lot of my traumas match up with common traumas of serial killers. I think it was just an attempt at humor that didn't sit well with me.

JimmyL2014

"....Yet."

Calletino

4. New York? Hard? Nah.

After struggling when I moved to NYC and becoming a shell of my former self, my first therapist told me, "You're not depressed. You're fine."

Moved back home and saw a new therapist: "Uh, you're so very far past fine. That therapist needs her license revoked."

JRothy16

3. How do you think I feel?

My school councillor said "you're just trying to scare me." Ended up crying right in front of her because it was the first time I told anyone about the hallucinations I was having. What a b!tch

Pancak3666

Unfortunately, in my experience, school counselors tend to be glorified class schedulers, college recruiters, and brochure pushers, and nothing more.

TrebleTone9

Sadly it sounds pretty standard for the school counselors I've seen over the years. Very few of them where I went to school were actually licensed. They were just a spare teacher who didn't have a classroom that year.

tempthethrowaway

2. Ouch.

He offered to help me turn myself over to law enforcement for not having managed to keep someone from ending their life.

ETA: Since Good Will Hunting is getting brought up I'm gonna explain something unpopular. It's not that fast nor simple in real life. It's a good movie, but it doesn't work IRL. This same guy was also berating me for still feeling guilty after he had used the "it's not your fault" line on me (after making the offer and realizing that I had looked into it myself). Because of this my new therapist has a harder job, as I'm freaked out about how she'll react if I don't get over everything in a matter of weeks.

MeppeKR


He offered to help me turn myself over to law enforcement for not having managed to keep someone from ending their life.

What possible crime did he think you committed?

chrisms

I didn't ask. I just told him that I already know it wasn't illegal.

MeppeKR

1. Bad take, to say the least.

Went to family therapy because my dad had the shortest temper and my mom drank. The therapist told me it was my fault that they did that. When I asked her is it also my fault when my dad picks me up from my shirt so he can scream in my face she said it was because I must have done something to set him off. I only saw her twice before going to someone else who actually dissected our families problems to find out why everyone acts the way they do.

MrKrazybones

Have you ever had a bad experience with a therapist? What happened?

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