People Share What They Wish Would Happen If They Right-Clicked Their Friends

The "Right" Click

Anyone familiar with computers knows what happens when you "right click" on the mouse; you get to see all the hidden options for a file. But what if there was a right click in life?

Reddit user Coast_2_Coast asked "What options would come up if you could 'right-click' people?"

Here are the creative replies.

Do I know you?

I'd hope nametags because I don't remember anyone's names

Under "properties", along with age, marital status, etc.

Friends in common, to see where you know them from.

No more arguing at bedtime

"Send to..." would be interesting

That would be amazing for parents. Right-click, Send to, Bed.

Relationships are hard

troubleshoot compatibility

This user has known compatibility issues.

You can check surrounding areas to see if there is a solution or better person available.

* Get help

* F it, approach the person without getting help

? Don't show this message again

It's time to duel!

Challenge to Duel

Asking for a friend

Add Friend

:(

Did you hear something?

Ignore

Yes. Ignore permanently-until-removed, or ignore-for-preset-duration would be great

"Other Permissions..."

Add to Contacts --- if this person has granted you permissions to do so, puts their email address / phone number / home address / etc. into your contact list.

Grant Permissions --- allow this person to access your information; also grant other permissions.

Snapshot --- record the thing this person is currently doing. Does not require permissions; can be used to document bad behavior.

Volume --- raise or lower your perception of this person's speech volume. Useful for that coworker who doesn't know how well their voice carries; or that person you're trying to make conversation with over loud music.

Block --- raises a hazy forcefield barrier between this person and you, preventing physical contact and muffling sound.

Have we met?

'Find related conversation...'

To find prior conversations you've had with or about the person.

It would save me a lot of embarrassment... "Nice to meet you, you must be ." "Nooo, I'm , we've met several times before..." /dies

Initiating Scan

Scan with antivirus.

Sing it

Buy it, use it, break it, fix it, Trash it, change it, mail, upgrade it, Charge it, point it, zoom it, press it, Snap it, work it, quick, erase it, Write it, cut it, paste it, save it, Load it, check it, quick, rewrite it Plug it, play it, burn it, rip it, Drag and drop it, zip, unzip it, Lock it, fill it, curl it, find it, View it, code it, jam, unlock it Surf it, scroll it, pose it, click it Cross it, crack it, twitch, update it, Name it, read it, tune it, print it, Scan it, send it, fax, rename it, Touch it, bring it, pay it, watch it, Turn it, leave it, stop, format it.

Just in case

Or use the alternative meaning of snapshot, make a complete record of the person as they are now and revert them to that if anything goes wrong.

There's no way this could end badly

What about copy, then paste. Now you have 2 of them. Delete, removes them from your life. Shift + delete removes them from existence. Cut then paste, cut them out of existence and move them someplace new at the exact moment they were cut out. Example, door to door sales person or religious/political knocmer shows up. Cut, walk over to annoying neighbor's house, knock on their door, paste, run.

I need an adult

report.

I don't know to who but I'd imagine it would go to the developer.

Mum & Dad are getting a lot of notifications that they never wanted...

So tasty

Refresh

-a lemonade appears in the person's hand

Teleporter Alternative?

If you could right click yourself that would be amazing, who needs cars when you just right click then "send to: C:Windows/user/(insert your name here)/home"

We are told that, if you're not confident, you should just "fake it til you make it."

This is great--in theory. In practice, sometimes "faking it" can have extremely real and terrible consequences, which these people found out the hardest of hard ways.

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