People Who Have Hired A Homeless Person Share Their Heartwarming Stories.

This article is based on the AskReddit question "Redditors who have ever hired homeless people with the "will work for food" signs, what was your experience like?"

[Source can be found at the end of the article]

1. Hardworking and determined

I worked at a Steak-n-Shake as a server on the graveyard shift throughout college. Weirdest place I ever worked - it was right off the interstate and we got the strangest people in around 3 am every night. Anyway, my manager was a really nice guy and one day saw a homeless lady crying outside. She said she had ridden her bike for like 10 miles to get to an interview at the hotel next door, and when the hotel manager realized she was homeless he basically told her to get out and didn't even bother interviewing her. She was so distressed that she just sat down and cried, and my manager saw her while he was taking out the garbage and asked if she was okay. After hearing her story he hired her as a cook, and she was seriously the hardest working person we had in the entire restaurant. She would take any shift and was never late, and never complained. She was pretty rough around the edges and missing most of her teeth, and I don't know if she could have actually had a job where she had to interact one-on-one with the customers ... but I'll be damned if she wasn't an awesome line cook.

I left that job shortly thereafter (again, weirdest place I ever worked) so I don't know what happened to her. I hope she saved up enough to be able to afford housing, because she was really trying to turn her life around.


2. Giving someone what he deserves

I hired one to rake the yard. He was hungry and very much in need. Must say ... he did a thorough job. After, I took him to buy food and introduced him to a local lawn service manager. They hired him, and he's been nothing but truly grateful ever since.

It may not always have a "happy ending" like this, but I'm thankful I could help him get a new lease on life and have a future.


3. A brave man!

In Chile my father and I parked in a sketchy neighborhood when we went to visit some family. Dad sees a homeless guy and gives him $5 and tells him to watch our car. Later, when we're walking back to our car we see some guy trying to take our windshield wipers. My dad's about to yell something when our homeless guy comes running, punches the guy in the back of the head and guy runs off. Homeless dude chases after him but my dad tells him to calm down. Dad gives him some extra cash and we have dinner with him.

10/10 would hire again.


4. Returning the kindness

One super cold night over Christmas break a couple years back, my roommates and I were walking to taco bell and saw a homeless man laying in the parking lot. He had a cheap, thin blanket, so we bought him some food and asked him if he wanted to spend the night inside and he came back and stayed at our house. Via Facebook, we helped him find his daughter who he hadn't spoken to in a couple years, and he was able to wish her a merry Christmas. When I woke up the next day, everything was cleaned. Blankets neatly folded up, and he had left us two pairs of socks and some deodorant. A week later, we came home to find that someone had raked all of our leaves for us. Haven't seen him since, but I hope he is well.


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5. It will remain a mystery

I tried once. Really just wanted my lawn mowed. Told the guy I'd cook him a meal if he mowed my lawn. All I got was a Screw You". He was literally holding a sign that said "Will work for food". Maybe he really was just looking for money. Maybe because I was 19 at the time he thought I was messing with him. I guess I'll never know.


6. Protect the truck!

I picked a guy up on the side of the road in front of a hospital who had a sign that said "Was just discharged, need a ride home." We will call him Dave. I thought I would be nice and give him a ride. He looked kind of sketchy so I told him I would give him a ride to the Wal-Mart near where he needed to go, as long as he was fine with sitting in the bed of my truck. He was very happy about it and he got in. I was driving down a pretty busy highway and I start hearing a car beeping. Dave had taken it upon himself to guard my truck from people tailgating me. He was hurling whatever he could find in my truck bed at the car behind me. It was only small rocks and crushed soda cans but he was giving it all he had. I slammed on the brakes and told him to get out. The car following me stopped too but the guy took off running. It was a really weird experience but I guess Dave meant well.


7. This is dedication

In college I got my fraternity to hire a homeless guy I always talked to do security for our parties. I went to college in a pretty bad city, and my fraternity never turned people away from our parties, so we sometimes had to worry about gang members wandering in.

The school wouldn't provide security since it could be seen as them condoning underage drinking, so I suggested we hire this homeless guy I knew who was always at my go-to munchies gas station because he had actually helped me out when I almost got mugged once and knew a lot of the less than savory characters. We told him we just needed him to let us know if there was anyone he knew might cause a problem. Dude was more professional than most bouncers at the bars I've been to. He made everyone that wasn't obviously a student show their necks and wrists for gang tattoos and ran a tight ship. Our president ended up getting him a bouncer job at club downtown.


8. How did he get there?

My dad worked at a Chinese restaurant when he first immigrated to Canada. They always noticed a homeless man in front of the store so they gave him a job cleaning the store's windows. He worked there cleaning windows for a little bit less than a year and cleaned himself up pretty good. My dad eventually left for school and eventually got a better job and he never really saw him again... Until last year. My dad and I were driving back from a basketball game and guess who we see driving a brand new 2013 Mercedes Benz? I honestly have no clue what happened between those 15-20 years but this man was given a blessing and a half. He gave my dad a nod and a grin right before the light turned green. What a guy!


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9. Actually putting some effort into working

My dad got a homeless guy to help him fill up one of those big dump bins. He said that the first five or so people told him that the signs were just for show and they weren't interested and then he got someone who was all for it. Dude did the work and got paid; no complaints. Asked if he could do the laundry and shower, which was fine; he did the work in terrible clothes that my dad had lying around (for working out/working in).

My dad did say that he was careful with who he asked and avoided people who looked off.

Living in the East Bay, I'd just go to one of the day laborer spots and get one of them.


10. Lending a helping hand

I had a homeless man help me carry groceries home; a friend was supposed to pick me up but decided a movie was more important. So I'm struggling to carry ~40lbs of groceries home in 100F plus weather when a scruffy looking guy offers to help me. He takes half of my load and makes pleasant conversation, but once the groceries were dropped off, he just tries to leave with a small "goodbye."

I tell him to take a shower while I cooked. I give him some of my boyfriend's undesirables and some pocket money, fed him, and told him to stay the night. I was probably too trusting, but my boyfriend was out of town and I didn't want to be alone. In the middle of the night, I go to the bathroom and hear him crying quietly in the living room. He was gone before I woke up in the morning, and nothing in my apartment was missing. I didn't see him again until a year later when he was working for the garbage pick up.

He looked a lot happier, despite working around trash all day, and I was happy he could find a place that would hire him and help him out of the situation he was in.


11. When your friends bail.

I hired a homeless guy to help me load furniture into my moving van after my friend flaked on helping me. He was an area regular and worked a corner two blocks from my apartment. He was always polite and would always apologize if he asked for some change before recognizing who I was.

He did an outstanding job. I ordered him a pizza, let him take a shower and gave him $100. He gave me his favorite book to read because he thought I would enjoy it. It was overall a very positive experience.


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12. All worth it

I've done it twice.

The first time we needed help moving bags of concrete and setting posts for a playground. I hired two homeless "will work for food" dudes to help us carry, by hand, 400 bags of concrete to the site...uppity facility so we couldn't trailer them over even use dollies or wheelbarrows. We had to carry them by hand.

The job would not have been completed that day had it not been for those two guys. They got fed for the day and $100 each for 8 hours work.


13. There is a hustle in everything

We've hired hundreds of them over the last 20 years mainly because I'm lazy and I can make more money with my time doing what I do. The only really memorable one was Tayvon. Tayvon stopped me in our parking lot one Friday morning and said he needed some work and he was willing to do whatever we had. Just the day before I'd gotten a notice from the city saying the bamboo on our backlot was getting out of hand and we needed to get rid of it. It's a little over an acre and if you've ever seen how bamboo grows there were THOUSANDS of 20' stalks. Told him I'd give him $100 to do it. Gave him a machete and figured I'd never see him or the machete again. Over the course of the day he cut every damn piece of the bamboo down and had them laid in a couple of huge piles. Paid him his money, thanked him, and told him I'd get my guys to haul it to the dump Monday. He asked me if he could have the big pieces first and I gladly let him. Came back in Monday morning and he was back in the lot helping somebody load a monster sized load of bamboo onto a trailer. He'd spent the weekend cutting all the branches off and trimming it into 6' long sections and was selling them all for $350 to a local plant nursery he'd done day labor work for in the past. We talked about it for a few minutes after the truck left and he just kept smiling and saying there was a hustle in everything, you just had to find it.


14. The most generous hitchhiker

I once picked up a hitchhiker that was trying to get from Washington to New Mexico when I was camping in Yellowstone. He had family in New Mexico that offered to help him, and had a good job lined up, he just had to get there.

So we picked him up and took him back to Colorado with us. He stayed on our couch for a week or two and picked up our mess and took care of maintenance I grossly neglected. My roommates and I were in college at the time and partied 3-4 days a week, so you can imagine the mess. The little money he would get from doing odd jobs for neighbors and such he would use to buy food and beer for all of us.

One day I had an errand to run about 50 miles closer to his destination but still 300+ miles from where he needed to be. He came with me and when he got out of the car handed me a letter and said don't read it until I get home. He then walked through a field straight towards the Rocky Mountains.

When I got home we all read the letter and it is the kindest set of words I've ever received. About a month later we get a call from an area code I don't recognize. It was him! He made it and called us on his first payday at his new gig. He also told us about the remainder of his journey. Turns out he walked and camped a large portion of the way back.

I have since moved multiple times and have grown up a bit. He's still welcome back whenever he wants though.

I hope all is well Freddy!


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15. Turned his life around

My parents have a house in Florida they rent out. My dad was down there doing repairs to it when a homeless man on a bike stopped by and asked if my dad needed help. Dad decided to hire him. Alton (the homeless man) helped my dad repaint the house, mow the lawn, and cut out all the overgrown plants. When the house wasn't rented and my family was up north, my dad paid Alton to mow the yard and keep an eye on the place.

While working with my dad, Alton asked Dad if he could borrow some money to buy some nice pants and shoes for an interview he had for a job. Dad wasn't sure he could trust him yet so instead my dad took him out to a store and they went shopping together for these items. Alton got the job as a chef and eventually got himself a room in a house with some other guys. Occasionally Alton will ask my dad for some emergency money and he always finds a way to pay it back.

I'm glad it all worked out for Alton.


16. Understanding kids and their situation

I was a shift leader at a Hardee's (Carls Jr for you west coast people) and it was perfectly located near where the homeless and all the skate kids hung out at. Both groups used to come in and harass everyone before I became a shift leader. Once I got to that point, instead of yelling and kicking them out I decided to sit them down and ask whats going on.

I come to find out, many of those teenagers and kids were either living in abusive homes or even homeless. I got the idea to use the food people mess up, and even using my manager meal to feed these poor kids while I could.

I became real close with many of them, and to this day keep up with all of them. One, in particular, used to be in and out of jail. A lot. I promised him every time he comes out I'll buy his first real meal. Well after a while, I moved jobs and got him a job where I worked at, a few months later, helping him out with what I could. He got a place, his girlfriend, who was pregnant at the time, moved in and they are doing great and their baby is adorable.

Being able to help and understand so many of those kids really changed my view on so many kids and why they act the way that they do.


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17. Inspirational words from a homeless woman

When I was poor, living in my first apartment, there was a homeless woman who hung around outside my apartment complex. She always hit me up for cash or cigarettes, and it started getting awkward. I was always broke, and barely keeping a roof over my own head, so seeing her and being unable to help most days made me feel bad. I finally just told her, "Look, I'm barely scraping by. I'm sorry to say no so often, but I'm eating Pringles for dinner this week, and I really can't help. If I ever have something extra, you can have it. Just please stop asking."

When I saw her the next morning on my way out she said, "Looking good, girl!" When I got home from work, she said, "Go on kick your feet up. You've had a long day." I gave her a cigarette.

Every morning, she said something nice or inspirational, and every evening, she told me I'd earned some R&R. Because she was so nice, I always tried to find something I could part with (loose change, clothes I would otherwise donate, leftovers). It turned into a really nice, symbiotic relationship, and I missed her when she moved on.


19. Help them get up and walk again

Small business owner. We had a remodel done on our building and had a lot of things to move around. Lots of furniture, supplies, etc. and on that particular day, two employees had to be away for a funeral of a mutual friend of theirs. Across from my location, and a bit down the street is a Wendy's. You have to pass it to get to my business from the main highway. Saw a man in front of their lot saying basically "Will work for food". He looked like a young, fairly healthy person and I decided to stop. We were down two people and really needed to get things done, and something just got me to go ahead and stop and chat a moment.

Turns out he had an unfortunate set of circumstances unfold for him. For privacy's sake won't get into them but he was homeless by no choice of his own. He confided he had a lot of family problems. He was only 18, and I offered to buy him lunch, and dinner, if he'd come help us out. He got in my truck after we ate and chatted a bit. We went to my business, and not only did he work, he worked his butt off. I have a good staff but, to be honest, he did more than they were doing. I was impressed and that night not only did I offer him dinner but a job too. Had to help him a few places along the way. He had nowhere to shower, no change for laundry, and I helped him out. By his 3rd week, he was doing great.

Fast forward 4 years and he is one of my most trusted managers, still my hardest worker. A year and a half ago he got married, they have a new baby girl. I interviewed I don't know how many people over the years and I'd have never found someone like him. 

I wouldn't have stopped ordinarily, but I am glad I did. Sometimes people genuinely just need a hand, and not only will they take full advantage, they'll make something of themselves. Some people are just going through a rough patch and are not looking for handouts, they're just looking for someone to help them get up and walk again.



Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like


My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308


My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango


I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina


With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3



I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold


Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.

I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-


Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.

An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451


Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence


How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster


My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"



It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?


I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)

The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.


Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.

I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.


Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.


Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.



Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.




3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.


Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.


Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.


Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.



My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.



How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).

How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.


Dogs and Chocolate


I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.


Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.


Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.


Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.


Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.


Stars In Their Multitude


I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.



My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.


Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.


Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...


Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.