People Who Made A 'Marriage Pact' When They Were Young Share What Actually Happened.

The whole 'If we're both single by X, we'll get married' statement is often said in jest, but for some it has a deeper, real meaning.

Below are 18 stories of people who made a marriage pact when they were younger...and what happened!

1. At 18, we promised that if we were still single at 30, we would marry each other. We really were those best friends that "would totally make a perfect couple." Similar in all the right ways, different in all the complementary ways. But we had totally different plans and circles, and it didn't seem to make any sense.

At 19, he had become a heroin addict and he would come and go from my life, hiding from me when he was using because he was ashamed and didn't want me to know. Of course I knew. I was patient, I was encouraging, and I missed him when he was flaky.

At 20, he moved to another state to get clean and start fresh. After a few months, he made a trip back to our hometown to pick up more of his stuff from his parents' house. I was thrilled that he was in town. He was supposed to be "on his way" to meet me for dinner so we could catch up. He never showed. He had that tendency to be flaky, so I was disappointed, but I just let it go. I texted him to just call me when he had time to meet for coffee or something, and gave up.

The next evening, I got a frantic phone call from his sister asking if he was with me - no one could find him, he wasn't answering his phone. His family had looked up his phone records and learned I was the last person he had spoken to. She was hoping his phone had died and he had crashed at my apartment. He hadn't.

We searched for 3 days. I begged everyone I knew to look for him. Many of our friends shrugged it off as him being his usual flaky self.

At the end of the 3rd day, we found him.

He had died of a heroin overdose. All alone, in his car, in an empty parking lot.

My heart broke. I cried for days on end trying to wrap my mind around it. One second you're planning to grab dinner with someone, and the next you're sitting at their funeral in a complete haze, trying not to think about your best friend being cremated because his body was too far ruined by being crumpled in a car in the August heat to salvage for an open casket viewing.

After the funeral, his other sister called me. She wanted to tell me thank you for being a good friend, and for never enabling his drug abuse like many of his other "friends" did. I'll never forget her saying, "he was totally in love with you. After he had been clean for a few weeks, he told me that once he was better he was going to go home and ask you out on a real date. I asked why he hadn't just done that already, and he said it was because he wasn't good enough for you yet, and that you deserved a whole person, not a broken one."

I'm a bit older and married now, but I don't make "if in the future..." plans or promises anymore. If I want something, I try to make it happen. If I dream of something, I start working toward it today. Because silly teenage us didn't even bother to consider the reality - you may never turn 30.


2. I had a "if we are still single" by 30 pact. We didn't make it to... (Continued)

I had a "if we are still single" by 30 pact. We didn't make it to thirty, I was 25 when he told me he wanted to be together. 9 years and going very strong.


3. My friend and I, both straight guys, made a pact for 40. "It would be funny. Just a couple of straight guys enjoying tax benefits."

We're not quite 30 yet, but our friendship is currently strained due to some actions on his part. Don't do drugs.


4. Did it, and it lasted 4 years. We had both changed too much.

That's all I got to say about that.


5. Our deal was 28. He was me best friend. At some point in our friendship he slept with one of my friends, (18) I got the idea we obviously were just friends and we kept it at that... I started dating my now husband and he almost immediately moved home.

I found out later from a mutual friend that when I got into a serious relationship it crushed him because he was in love with me. He even offered to come back and take care of me when I ended up pregnant a few years ago. I would probably have married him if he would have told me how he felt. Oh well, such is life.


6. We were both 18 when we "jokingly" planned to marry if we were both still single at 40.

We barely made it to 25 before getting engaged.


7. Back in highschool me and this awesome girl had one for the age of 30. I forgot about it because I got busy travelling and working my career, saw on facebook she got knocked up and looked awesome, then out of nowhere of no contact for a few years afterwards she messages me saying: (Continued)

Then out of nowhere of no contact for a few years afterwards she messages me saying "Im getting married to blablabla, sorry". At first I was happy and excited for her thinking nothing of it and why it came out of nowhere for a private message, then later that night after a couple beer I remembered our deal then got sad and had more beer.

Stoked for her though, she has a beautiful family in a nice quiet town. Meanwhile I'm a nomadic contractor who's soul is destroyed who'll be forever alone.


8. Made a deal with a friend that we would get married at 35 if neither of us found anyone else by then. She decided to skip all that stuff after a few months and we've been together for almost 7 years now.


9. Made an "if we're single by 30 pact" but she stopped talking to me after I banged her best friend when we were 25. Whoops.


10. Me and my bestie had the whole "if we are still single by 30" thing going. We made it to 28 and decided to just get married anyway. We met at 11 years old.

Also both of us are female but neither of us are gay. We just decided we'd rather live together as best friends than keep trying to find husbands we like more than each other.


11. The woman I had the deal with is now married to the father of the girl who set me up with the woman who became my wife.


12. I crushed on a girl since I met her at 15. Never once told her how I felt - junior high thru high school. Went off to different colleges. I always kept in touch throughout the years off and on. We were sort of friends. I'd maybe email her once or twice every couple years. She finally got on facebook around age 35 and we got to talking. Both sort of single with pathetic dating lives at the time, so we joked around about getting married if we were both single by age 40. Never thought it was serious. We lived in different states. Time went on and the keeping in touch fizzled.

I got deployment orders to an undisclosed location in the Middle East and went back to my small home town to... (Continued)

I got deployment orders to an undisclosed location in the Middle East and went back to my small home town to visit my mom before I left. I got super drunk with one of my old high school buddies. He had her number so I blew up her phone, texting all my feelings I've had for like 20 years. I was black out drunk and vaguely remember doing it. The next morning I embarrassingly read everything I wrote. At first, she was very confused thinking it was the other guy writing all this to her. He was married, btw.

She got a hold of me and we chatted. I called her. Both still single. We texted and called as much as possible during my deployment. She'd send me care packages. Her support really got me through a rough deployment. When I returned stateside she was there to greet me. We had our first kiss at the airport. It was so exciting, the butterflies. We spent 10 awesome days together. Then I flew back with her and spent the rest of my leave with her. I proposed 3 months later, she said yes. I moved cross country and we got married.

Sounds like something out of a romantic movie, huh?

We currently have a 1 year old 17 month old and I have to admit our marriage is pretty rocky. A by product of rushing a marriage, child and 10 other life changing events in such a short time span without really getting to know each other and setting and agreeing on life expectations up front. But I'm hopeful with either outcome - stay married or divorce.

That's my story.


13. We were friends for years (since we were kids), we had a 'let's get married by 40' arrangement, she ended up dating a guy and had a kid with him. I gave up on that idea. Then he cheated, I stopped pussyfooting around and told her I loved her, and we're expecting our daughter within the next few days!

We're not married yet, but hey we're not 40 yet either.


14. When my college roommate got married, her little sister and I plotted to get married by 30 to cash in on all the sweet wedding gifts. It became a running joke, with a hint of reality. Like, "ha ha, but maybe?". When she was 29, we were all back in town for Christmas and she brought her long term boyfriend. Apparently, she was getting mad at him for dating this long with no proposal. So, I stopped by the grocery store and got one of those candy ring pops. I reminded her of our deal, gave her the ring and offered her my services if no other suitors had stepped up yet. A laugh was had by all, but her bf went out the very next day and bought her a real ring and proposed. I'm going to take full credit for them being happily married for 4 years now. And in case you're worried for me, I met a girl that very weekend that I've been dating for almost 3 years. Happy endings for everyone!


15. I had a married by 30 pact with a girl in high school. I freaking loved this girl. We used to pass around notes that were signed "M30" as sort of a little inside joke between us, even when we were seeing other people. We did date for about a year at some point.

She literally... (Continued)

She literally FORGOT by the time she was 27 or so, and swears she has no recollection of the whole thing. I was married already and wasn't trying to "activate" the arrangement at all, but that still pretty much broke my heart.


16. Made this pact with a friend in high school and we're still friends today. We've got 14 years to go until 40, but if we did try to invoke it I could see it going either way really. We've tried dating before and that went pretty badly, but a lot changes between 15 and 40, so maybe we wouldn't be too scared to hold hands if we tried again in a decade.


17. Have a friend who lives quite far from me. Heck, she lives in Philly and I'm in Canada. Known each other for a decade or so, and although we've never been super close, we do share a lot of similar values and mindsets. For quite some time we kept in very close contact, used each other as sounding board and there was some mutual attraction for sure, but we knew it just wouldn't work - if not only for the distance, other logistics.

I was in my early 30's, she was approaching mid 30's. She was dead set she wanted a child and I'm undecided. Both of us were single. She insisted she wanted to be preggo before she was 35 as her biological clock was running out and she didn't care if she'd be a single mother, she'd go to a sperm bank. Her dream has always been to be a mother. Incredibly admirable.

After a lot of talking, we agreed that we would at least try to conceive together if she reached 35 with no partner. We went so far as to research the laws for me signing off all rights and her not to be able to back-door me for support and whatnot - in both of our respective places and it seemed like it would be possible for me to basically be a donor with no ties. We continued to casually joke about it from time to time, but suddenly she'd 34 and it's becoming more of a reality.

I had a ton of vacation time left at work and some extra cash on hand. I decided to go visit for a week because why-the-hell-not, right? There was a heavy implication that we'd "give it a practice run" before her birthday in 8 months. Things were looking bleak for her. She was 34, no relationship, job was going to crap, and was living in a place she mainly hated.

She picks me up from the airport and the entire ride home she's telling me about this guy who she just met and how he's wonderful. I'm happy to hear it until I meet him the next day. He just seems... Bland. Boring. Not right. He was kind of cold and not very affectionate towards her. Wouldn't really hold her hand... warning signs.

Anyways, me and my friend had some long talks and we never ended up crossing any friendship lines. It just wasn't right. I head home and within a few weeks they are dating. Turns out he had a lot of reservations as he felt like she wanted to have a fling with me before she got into anything, and she kind of had to come clean about her and I's plan. He was trying to respect her and, oddly me. It was... interesting.

So, 6 months later they are engaged. Married fairly quick, and she was pregnant within a few months into her 35th year. She had a beautiful baby girl, she found a great new job, and they just bought a house in the suburbs together. They look like they are happier than ever and I couldn't be happier for them.

As for me, I met an absolutely wonderful woman 1.5 years ago and we're going strong. I still keep in contact with that woman, albeit a lot less than before, and we're both on great life paths.


To the last page for the best story yet!

18. Finally a thread I can contribute to. So this happened when I was 28 - about 3 years ago. I met a girl at work (let's call her Jess. Her real name is quite unique as she is french and I don't want to be too obvious). So anyway, she had just started working at the same place as me, and over the course of the next few weeks I slowly started making conversations with her. It started with just a casual 'good morning' as she would come into work. She was always later than I was, by about ten minutes or so, and always seemed a bit flustered when she came in to work. I can't really describe it, but the way she acted, mixed with her perfect french accent was really endearing to me. She wasn't the most perfect woman by any stretch of the imagination, but there was just something about her I really liked.

Anyway, so a few days later I left for work early and bought a coffee for Jess for when she arrived at work. She thought it was a bit odd at first, but it was enough so that I was able to start conversations with her. I asked her out on a date, she accepted and it went really well. Over the few weeks we had been on 3 dates or so, and she had stayed at mine on one occasion.

We got talking and she said something along the lines of 'Did you ever think you'd be further along in life by this age?' Admittedly I was a little offended by this, but it turns out she was talking more about herself than me. She admitted she was sad that she'd never really been in a long term relationship, and expected life to have played out a little differently. We kept chatting and I jokingly said 'yeah, I was hoping to be married by the time I was thirty'. She laughed and said that if I wasn't married by the time I was 30, then she'd marry me. 'I promise' she said. I guess it was kind of cute.

After a few weeks of occasionally meeting up and chatting, Jess told me that she'd be moving departments at my work. I didn't really think much of it at first, but not being able to see her every morning started to take it's toll. Eventually, for some reason, the relationship sort of fizzled out, and that was the end of things with Jess. Fast forward a couple of years, I had a new girlfriend, a better paying job, and everything was pretty good. It was the day before my 30th birthday, and my new girlfriend, Sophie, was planning a surprise for me. I fell asleep, wondering what surprises tomorrow had in store.

At 12am, the exact moment that I turned 30, I heard a smash. Jess was stood in my kitchen. She had abseiled down the side of my apartment building, kicked through the window, and was stood holding a baguette and string of garlic. 'I remember the promise I made' she said smoothly, in her alluring, but now somewhat scary french accent.

Anyway, one thing lead to another and she ended up battering my new girlfriend to death with a slightly stale baguette. Me and Jess are married now. She makes really great omelettes, too.



Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like


My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308


My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango


I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina


With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3



I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold


Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.

I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-


Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.

An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451


Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence


How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster


My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"



It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?


I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)

The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.


Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.

I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.


Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.


Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.



Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.




3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.


Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.


Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.


Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.



My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.



How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).

How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.


Dogs and Chocolate


I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.


Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.


Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.


Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.


Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.


Stars In Their Multitude


I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.



My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.


Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.


Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...


Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.