People Who Suffer From Sleep Paralysis Describe Exactly What It's Like

People Who Suffer From Sleep Paralysis Describe Exactly What It's Like

Sleep paralysis is a feeling of being conscious but unable to move. It occurs when a person passes between stages of wakefulness and sleep. During this time, you may be unable to move or speak for a few seconds up to a few minutes. Sleep researchers conclude that, in most cases, sleep paralysis is simply a sign that your body is not moving smoothly through sleep stages.

That doesn't make it any less frightening however.

Reddit users the_yarb and aleks_1999 asked those "who have experienced sleep paralysis, what is the feeling and what are your first thoughts when it occurs?"

Here are the chilling responses.


I woke up and couldn't move. I had never heard of sleep paralysis, so it was pretty scary.

It wasn't quite as terrifying as I've seen some descriptions of, but I guess results vary. It went through my head that I might be dying and I just kind-of told myself "oh well, eff it, doesn't look like I can do anything about it" so I went back to sleep.

Not sure if it means I have no will to live, or if I'm some sort of zen bad-ass. It was an interesting experience to say the least, wouldn't recommend.


I've had it happen enough times that I understand what's happening, but every time I still panic and try to wake myself up. I wish I had a zen attitude about it, but my heart starts racing (at least I feel like it does).

I'll wake myself up, open my eyes and think to myself, "whew, thank god that's over", then I'll notice something that's a little off in my room, like the lighting is wrong, or an object isn't where it usually is, and then the realization that I'm still stuck and can't move kicks in and I freak out, and try to wake myself up.

I've "woken myself up" about 6 or 7 times in one sleep paralysis session before, and everything looks so real and vivid, except for a few details, I fall for thinking I'm awake every time.

And when I finally do become awake for real, I spend at least half the morning questioning if I'm still asleep or not. It's kinda freaky


My experience seems to be different from most people. I woke up, could breathe fine, nothing hurt. It was just like waking up, except I couldn't move. It was like my muscles had suddenly grown very weak and I couldn't even lift my own arms.

It was scary my first time, especially because I started lucid dreaming soon after, but didn't know how to control it, which ended in probably the worst, most realistic nightmare I've ever had.

The second time, however, I actually managed to break out of sleep paralysis. I realized what was happening to me, and so I relaxed for a moment but made sure I didn't fall asleep again. Then, I just started thinking about other things. I started thinking about how thirsty I was, so I focused all of my energy into lifting my head so I could get some water. It took some concentration- It felt like I would be able to lift my head easily, but that power seemed... distant. It was like extreme laziness. I wanted to move, but just couldn't force myself to get up. However, I eventually managed to lift my head, and then my arms followed, and soon I was up. It took a long time though- it's a lot faster to just fall back asleep.


I get sleep paralysis a few times a month, and it tends to happen when I am stressed and overly tired.

The first time it happened, I knew what it was and so I was not scared. I did not experience any presences or fear, I just could not move. I have to concentrate very hard on moving one small part of my body - usually clenching and unclenching my toes is easiest, and then I can fully move again.

After a bout of sleep paralysis, I have to at least roll over in bed. If I stay in the same position and fall back asleep, it will happen again within the next half hour, and continue to happen every half hour until I roll over or get frustrated and just get up.

Classroom Nightmare

A weird thing I have noticed is I usually encounter the 'scarier' experiences when I have been sleeping for a longer time. It happens to me so often that every now and then it will happen to me when I doze off in class at school. I will do what I usually do and do the countdown and try to get up with all my strength and by the time it works instead of just waking up like a usual person would I would dramatically shoot up from my head down on the desk and people all get scared around me.


This happens to me a lot actually, usually about 3-4 times a month. I've learned to adjust to it. Now its more of a "F* not this again"

To describe it in my experience for other people who have never had it. Imagine a time in life where you were too scared to move, Or even had one of those dreams where you try to run but can't. It's that exact feeling, but it's real and you can't move or speak. You are stuck in place while the world around you is dark and strange noises creep into your ears. You start wondering if you are dreaming but you know in the back of your mind that you are awake and this isn't just another dream. You feel your entire body as if it were filled with lead and your blanket had turned to steel and encapsulated you. You are a prisoner in your own body, your only escape is hoping you can calm down enough to return to the safety of your dream, this waking nightmare is hopefully only temporary and fleeting fast. Once it's over you fear it's return, the haunting feeling of being so helpless and vulnerable with no obvious signs it could happen the next night, and then the next, and the next...

When it first started I was absolutely terrified every single time and would cry. I lost a lot of sleep in school due to fear of having another case of it. Eventually I learned tricks how to wake myself up.

Prelude to Night Terrors?

I go between hallucinations and being aware that I'm in sleep paralysis.

It gets really nightmarish when I go through a cycle of waking up from a dream into another and I tell my hands to move and they do but not in the real world.

It takes screaming and all my strength just to move the slightest bit or let out a groan to tell my girlfriend to shake me awake.

My dad has night terrors and screams in his sleep with constant nightmares, I'm hoping that doesn't start happening to me.


I actually woke up in sleep paralysis once, opened my eyes, realized what's happening (it happened numerous times before), saw a figure or entity on the chair near my bed and didn't think much of it. I kind of reacted like it was normal or like didn't want to do any harm, and went back to sleep...

Another time I felt like I started to float, and even something pulling me out. I guess I was close to an Out of Body Experience (OBE), but got scared and woke up when I felt I was dragged (or at least that was my impression/imagination).

These things happened a lot more frequently when I was meditating daily

Creeping Dread

I've been having sleep paralysis for years, several times a week, and personally, the first time it happened was extremely scary. Kicking, screaming, clawing for anyone to help me only to hear my muffled moans when I'd float out of the dream state and always finding myself in the same position I "fell asleep" in despite KNOWING that I moved to try to wake up or clawed someone for help.

Personally it happens so often that I know when it's coming. Usually just feels like I can't move my toes at first, and I begin feeling this dread come over me. I usually try to close my eyes, knowing that panicking will only push me further into it. I continuously wiggle my toes, knowing that I only THINK they're moving, until my blanket moves from the shaking then I usually get up out of bed and move around. Or go in my phone and completely change my state of mind. I've never had an experience less than terrifying so I'd have to say fear is my first reaction/thought.


So, I'll just go over one of the worst episodes I had when I was younger. I was falling asleep listening to a podcast out loud on my phone.

When I "woke up" I was looking at the bottom right corner of my room. There were 4 figures that appeared to be talking in a circle. I couldn't understand what they were saying. I honestly thought they were here to kill me. All the sudden I could make out what one of them was saying. "shhhh, he's awake" and they all looked at me.

I gained control of my body again and ran out of my room. Didn't go back for a few nights.

Over Tired

For me, it's quite like still being in a dream but being aware of it, not 100% conscious. I was told to just go back to sleep and my body would wake up naturally. I used this method for years, but "woke up" after falling asleep in the car with my brother and a couple of friends with my mom driving one night. I remember feeling safe, and just laying there, listening to everyone talk. I eventually woke up but was able to go back to sleep and repeat the process a couple of times.

It happened a couple of weeks ago, and my girlfriend was sitting next to me in the bed watching TV. She said I often kick my legs around, which I recall trying to do to wake up, but couldn't feel them moving. I remember trying to talk to her, but all she could hear is "whimpering".

I could be wrong, but I recall a doctor explaining that as your mind incorporates surrounding stimuli into your dreams to prevent you from waking up when you need the sleep, this seems to be related to when I am exhausted and not getting enough rest.

3rd Time Is No Charm

Happened three times in one night. BOY WAS IT A STRESSFUL DAY

First time I "woke up", I couldn't open my eyes. Or move. at first i was like "oh cool sleep paralysis, I've heard about it, might be fun".

But then I heard footsteps from the hall into my room. I'm not a very religious man, but have I ever prayed so much. Immediately after that, I woke up, extremely sweaty. Took a while to calm down, then fell asleep.

Then I "woke up" for the second time, nothing special, couldn't move at all, realized what was happening, then just decided to sleep.

Third time I "woke up" I heard a distant laughter in my bedroom. I just prayed some more and woke myself up crying. After that I just didn't sleep and pulled an all-nighter, while being very very scared.

Not Enough Air

I wake up feeling like my face is in the pillow. My hands are trapped underneath me. I am trying to move them, but they don't work.

Maybe I can rock my shoulders back and forth and the arms will come loose. But I can't. I'm starting to panic. I just can't get enough air.

I try feebly to call out to my wife next to me, just so she'll give me a little push. Please wake up just once. But what noise I can make, if any, is not going to be heard by sleeping beauty. I try to relax. I haven't died the other hundreds of times this has happened, but I sure would like a little more air.

Dream Induced

I get this regularly, and how it happens can vary pretty significantly. I tend to suffer from pretty bad nightmares, so the worst cases are when I'm trapped in a really negative dream and it feels like my whole mind is trying to suck itself out of there but my body isn't responding.

Sometimes I have trouble breathing. From there, a lot of the times I manage to make one violent jerking movement of sitting or lurching up in bed (I sleep on my back).

There have been times though where I wasn't able to actually wake up and fell back into a nightmare.

There have been times where I thought that there was another person or at least...presence in the room with me. I am confused if these were very vivid dreams, hallucinations or actual encounters with spirits. I am not a firm believer in that stuff but I'm not ruling it out.

I once thought that a demon or something was sitting on my chest and guiding my dreams into bad places as I fought to wake up and push it off. That is one of the more surreal things I have ever encountered during sleep paralysis, and it is terrifying on different levels. My mind could've been creating the demon dream to rationalize my labored breathing, or maybe I'm just losing it slowly.


I was in bed, thankfully not alone. I heard the front door open and close, and could feel someone getting closer. I couldn't so much as hear the footsteps, but I could feel them and the presence.

I tried to speak to my spouse to wake him, because I was afraid, and couldn't. At this point I realized it was sleep paralysis, and after that is was just really cool, to experience my body do something that I shouldn't have experienced at all. I tried to move, and couldn't, and just found that to be so awesome.

It took a few moments after that to fully wake.


13 year old me woke up and couldn't move like how you'd expect. I had a TV that was at the end of my bed, and I just remember a black figure crawling out like the girl in the ring, except it started crawling on the ceiling. as it got above me, I blinked and it seemed to teleport over by my left side, then looked at me for five seconds or so.

It all ended right after that. I just remember going down stairs crying hard as I explained it to my mom. It was awful.

Only time it's ever happened. Scared to death that it'll happen again.

Prescription Induced

I had this for a few years while take some serious antipsychotic meds. It's hell. The first time it happened I couldn't move but I thought I was screaming and couldn't understand why my husband wasn't helping me. I ended up in a full blown, can't breathe panic attack before it ended.

Every time after that I'd panic but try to talk myself down from a full blown panic attack, sometimes it worked, other times not so much. It didn't help matters that I always experienced this immediately following night terrors that left me terrified and traumatized.

It hasn't happened in a few years but it's not a feeling I'll ever forget.


I'm startled awake by either a sound or a tactile sensation, like something bumping my bed, pulling my hair.

I think at first that I am frozen in fright from being startled until I try to move but can't. At that point I usually know what is happening but sometimes not.

I'm also then aware of a faceless shadowy man in my room. Sometimes he physically attacks me, other times he just stands ominously in the doorway. Even knowing it's a hallucination doesn't make it feel less real in the moment. I hate it so much.

Dry Drowning

I couldn't breathe any more than these tiny, unfulfilling breaths and as I panicked I felt like I needed more and more air but couldn't get it.

Like drowning out of water.

Also could not speak to call for help, even though my boyfriend was sleeping a foot away.

Family Tradition

I've had sleep paralysis my whole life, but I didn't understand what it was until a few years ago when I googled it.

I usually get it either right before I'm going to fall asleep, or waking up from a nightmare. For me, the sensation is like being smothered while falling, and I'm uncomfortably warm. When I'm falling asleep, it isn't too bad. I'll get auditory hallucinations, like hearing someone laugh (not a creepy laugh, just regular laughter) or talk, or a crashing noise like something fell off my desk.

The episodes I get following nightmares are the worst. Usually it starts with that falling feeling as I'm coming out of the dream. When I open my eyes, I usually have a visual hallucination.

Shadows coming towards me, three figures with red eyes looming over my head, my door opening, things like that.

The worst I've ever had was when there was a hunched over impish figure with bulbous eyes and fangs just staring at me. I couldn't move. His mouth wasn't moving, but it was like I could hear him whispering really awful things in my head. I remember the feeling of panic was overwhelming and I wanted to scream but I just couldn't move.

After that I had really bad anxiety when it came to falling asleep, so I did a lot of research and learned that people who sleep on their back are more likely to experience sleep paralysis. Ever since I started sleeping on my side, I haven't had an episode. I literally can't fall asleep in any other position now because it makes me nervous. I also learned that apparently my father had it, but he doesn't like to speak about his experiences.

Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like


My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308


My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango


I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina


With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3



I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold


Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.

I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-


Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.

An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451


Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence


How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster


My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"



It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?


I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)

The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.


Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.

I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.


Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.


Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.



Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.




3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.


Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.


Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.


Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.



My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.



How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).

How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.


Dogs and Chocolate


I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.


Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.


Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.


Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.


Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.


Stars In Their Multitude


I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.



My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.


Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.


Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...


Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.