People Who Were Suspected Of A Crime They Didn't Commit Reveal What It Was Like

"It wasn't me!"

There's not much you can do when the righteous fist of the law comes down on you. Call it a mix-up, or call it a mistake, if someone's pegged you at the scene of a crime there's not much you can do but trust the justice system to prove you innocent. However, that's a gamble, and just because you've been given a "not guilty" doesn't mean the effects won't follow you for the rest of your life.

Reddit user, u/danbrownskin, wanted to hear about the times when it wasn't you, seriously, it was someone else, when they asked:

Redditors who were once considered suspect of a crime they did not commit, what's it like being held under suspicion and how did it affect your life?

50. It Feels Like Your Life Is Taken From You


I was prosecuted in 2014 having been charged with conspiracy to commit criminal damage over a 2 year period, to a value of about £200k. I was on bail for 9 months during which I couldn't speak to 8 of my best mates, I had to find time to attend court without it affecting my work, and I had to fork over £5k in legal aid contributions.

My home was raided, I was arrested, I suffered from anxiety and it put me and my family under an awful lot of stress. I knew I wasn't guilty and it felt like my life was on hold for ages.

After two weeks of trial, the prosecution offered no evidence and I was, therefore, found not guilty. It felt like the world was lifted from my shoulders.


49. Hard To Getaway With A Baby

My ex was accused of robbing a house, and I was accused of being the get away driver. The cops came to my house, and questioned me. My ex had been out of town working, and you'd think that would've been an airtight alibi, but it wasn't. They figured where he was he could have robbed the house, and been where he was to start work. He came home early to deal with this despite my protesting. They arrested him visiting his terminally ill mom.

I had our baby with me, and they told me to follow them to the station where they would have cps waiting to take custody of our baby. I ran to my mom's house. They tried to arrest me as a get away driver, but I had an absolute airtight alibi, and they had to let me go. They kept him for the charges of home invasion.

Our relationship suffered after that. Said I cast too much suspicion when I ran with the baby, and it looked like I was stashing the stolen property. He lost his job because of it. They printed it in the local paper that he was arrested for the crime. After further investigation we were implicated by the actual robbers. They knew I was a stay at home mom, and didn't figure I'd have an alibi, and they didn't know that he had been working out if time. They gave the police our name, and the plates off my car.

The police never printed a retraction saying he wasn't the robber. There wasn't a retraction saying that I was no longer a suspect. Our names were ran through the mud. It completely ruined our relationship because he said I hung him out to dry. I had to move away and start over because people wouldn't hire me.


48. Trust A Better Friend Next Time


Not me, but a friend of mine was arrested on charges of downloading child pornography. The whole thing took two years to come to court.. which was instantly dismissed due to him being able to prove he was on vacation and had left a friend housesitting during the time of the downloads. Those two years destroyed his life though... local paper released his arrest details, he lost his job, his house was attacked by a mob (he had to pick up and leave in the middle of the night with nothing....he's never been back so he lost the house he owned and all of his possessions)... he ended up living in a tent in a field. It's been probably 5 years since he was totally acquitted and he's just now got his life back to normal.


47. Sometimes It's Too Late To Fix The Problem

I was falsely accused of domestic violence. Every horror story and legend about this you've heard is actually not bad enough to capture what actually happens to you as a male when this occurs.

She was kept anonymous, but my identity was public. My family shunned me, my friends abandoned me, lost my job, my car, my house, the legal bills ruined me. She suffered no consequences either.

Not only was I found Not Guilty, but I also received a "Finding of Innocence" which basically means, "This could not have happened, there is no way the accused did this."

Didn't matter though, the damage was done. In the end, I found out who really cares about the truth, and me. That liar died an early, painful death of cancer though.


46. It Wasn't Me, It Was The Other Me!

I almost went to jail and had my identity frozen because some guy had the same first name and last name as me, born on the same day, same month, SAME YEAR.

This guy was on parole and I think had a warrant out for him too. The only thing that saved me was that we lived in different counties, which happen to be right next to each other. The DMV had to contact the hall of records and compare our social security numbers to make sure that I wasn't the one on parole.

I dealt with it for several years, multiple police logs about my mistaken identity, multiple times being put in the back of a squad car because they thought I was him. I hope he got his life together.


45. Sir, Are You Also 'John Smith'?


Ah, it's been fun. I was once brought to the Military Comissariat (that's the place in Russia where all the stuff about the military forces in the region is done). That was some time ago, I wasn't 18 yet and I had to bring my father too. They told me that there was a guy in Crimea who tried to purchase a place in FBI. He called somebody that he was making a deal with using a phone that he borrowed from a man on the street.

When he got caught, he told the authorities the name of phone's owner... which matches with my name completely (consider that the patronymic (father's name) is a part of a name too in Russia).

I asked all of their questions, told them I never was in Crimea, they copied some stuff from my phone's AC and I left. They never bothered me again. It was the oddest experience I had in my life.


44. Just Call Me "BomberMan"

When I was in 8th grade someone set off a homemade explosive near my house. They made a huge deal about it even though it was equivalent to a big firework.

Someone at my school submitted an anonymous tip that said "I know how to make bombs." I had a detective put the screws on me at school soon after. They tried really hard to get me to admit to something I didn't do. I don't know if it mattered, but they interrogated me at school without my parents knowledge and before they were ever made aware I was a potential suspect.

The detective told me "You're the mastermind of this complex and I'm going to prove it." He then showed up at my house after school that day and interviewed my parents. I told my parents in front of him that he straight up accused me of doing it and quoted his little line. He denied it which was such a jerk thing to do.

It didn't really affect my life long term. It sucked when it happened and then I forgot about it.


43. The Unfortunate Problem Of Being The Last Person To See Her

When I was in high school one of my friends disappeared. We had a normal day at school, afterwards she asked me to drive her a couple of places for yearbook ad sales. I did and dropped her off back at school. She never made it home. That night I got a call from her mother asking if I knew where she was. I didn't. I rallied some friends, we made some flyers and hit all the obvious spots--airport, bus station and even called the local hospitals.

A couple of days later some detectives showed up at school and questioned me. Like someone else noted in this thread, I was not read my rights nor were my parents asked to be with me while I was questioned. Since I was the last person known to have seen her I was the prime suspect. I told them for hours I had no clue where she was.

Several days later I retraced our stops. At one place, the cops showed up and questioned me again. I was just looking for my friend.

My parents got involved at this point and the detectives backed off a little bit. But I ended up getting followed and I even got a ticket for something dumb, like going over a double yellow line, just so the cops could search my car. It was classic harassment and to this day I don't have a high regard for cops.

A few months later, my phone would ring at odd hours in the middle of the night. I would answer but whomever was on the other end of the phone wouldn't say a peep. Finally one night the call came, and she said hello. She told me what happened and where she was. I couldn't believe it, I thought she was dead. She had bad reasons for running away but I respected why she did it. I didn't know what to do.

I went into school the next day and asked a trusted teacher what I should do. He told me I had to tell the authorities so I could give her family some peace and also to raise the cloud of suspicion I was under. So I did, I betrayed her confidence and called her family and the cops. Her family retrieved her from where she fled to and put her in private school. I tried calling her a few times but she refused to take my call. I wrote her off.

Some years later I Googled her and found out she was a bigwig at an Ivy League institution. I ended up sending her and email and she called me. She graduated HS, went to a great school and began her career. We chatted a couple of times but not once did she apologize. She did tell me life was bad for her after her family got her back.

She was sort of resentful that I told on her I think. We never did connect in person. While I think she has some resentment. I am happy she turned out ok. Yeah, it was a few months of hell and I didn't deserve it. I just simply moved on. I Google her every now and then, she's sort of a local celebrity where she lives, she involved with the arts so her name is published quite frequently.

Cops can really make your life hell if they want to.


42. A Cousin By Any Other Name


Not me, but my cousin.

He lives near San Francisco, and he was coming out of a movie one night when some cops stopped him. Apparently, someone stole one of those rented bikes, and a witness have a description that matched my cousin.

They didn't take him in, but they did grill him about where the bike was, got the witness to come and say it was him, and stuck him in the back of their car for a while. They told him he was a good liar but a dumb thief because all the bikes have GPS tracking.

Spoiler alert, he didn't steal the bike, and they found it with someone else who matched the description. They showed the witness, who confirmed it was the other guy, and they let my cousin go.

Neither the cops nor the witness apologized about the whole thing, but from what I gather, that's par for the course. My cousin was shaken up about it, but nothing else happened.


41. Dead Giveaway Was The Braces

This is a mild one.

When I was 16, my parents got a notice of a warrant out for my arrest. This 4'11" teenage girl with braces. Cue our confusion.

We contact the police and find out that some woman from a vintage store I frequented had accused me of a hit and run in their parking lot. The police officer handling the case was awful. Never contacted me. Looked at my car and saw no damage, but since the woman could pick my photo out of a line up (I went to this store all the time, of course she would recognize me) the cop decided that I did the crime and that I needed to be arrested.

My parents had to hire a lawyer and we went to court. We were able to get the case dropped, unless more evidence were to come up.

None ever did.

It was scary, and my parents were pissed at me for months (even though I didn't do anything).


40. Cheating The System

Worked as a cashier while in college at a well known big box wholesaler. The system has clerks and assistants with a pretty big pay difference. I worked the crappy shifts and got more "clerk time" so higher pay and quicker raises because others wanted to go home early all the time.

I was accused of cheating to get raises. Several times they looked at the time cards and all they saw was the I worked late crappy shifts and always covered for people that wanted to go party.

Money ended up missing from a register that I was on while covering for a break. Everyone on the register was put on the "watch" list.

I never once stole from them, but co-workers were really pissed. They took time off to party while I worked crappy shifts and saved. They bought new cars while I drove an old clunker and saved money. I had money while they were broke and they didn't like that.

I was setup several times and this was a union shop, after quite a while, the union finally stepped in and realized what was going on.

They never found any evidence of anything. Managers and co-workers made a different set of rules to harass me, even thou I was the guy picking up the crappy late nite shifts and working when others just wanted to party.

Not the first time these kinds of things happen. Seems people just don't like to see others that don't fit in with what they are or do.


39. Unfortunate Car Damage


I was driving my buddies car that matched the description to a T of another car that has just hit a girl on a skateboard. This happened in a small town, so the whole town was looking for the car. I had a police officer damn near leap or in front of me as I was pulling away from a stop sign and berated me left and right.

They brought some witnesses over and said the car I was driving was the car. I understand that because the car that hit the girl had a smashed up front right corner and the side mirror got ripped off when the car hit the girl. The car I was driving had a smashed right front and no side mirror. They were ready to haul me in until another cop came over and noticed the car I was driving was covered in dust, whereas the car that hit the girl wasn't dusty per witnesses.

A few phone calls to my buddies house from the police verifying that I had just come from there saved me and they reluctantly let me go. They found the real culprit a few hours later.

It didn't really affect me much because nothing came of it, but it was terrifying at the time. It almost felt like a movie, like it's this really happening, am I seriously going to jail for something I didn't do?


38. These Are Your Formative Years

Some friends and I were surrounded by rifle wielding cops while walking home from taco bell one day when I was 14 or 15. The arrested us, and took us to the station. They kept asking us to confess, that they know what we did, and that they had witnesses.

To this day I have no idea what they suspected us of. They let us go that night. I don't trust cops.


37. Just Another Good Story

My husband was a murder/missing person suspect for a day or two, as he and his friend gave the guy a ride home and were the last to see him. I'm sure at first it was stressful since they didn't know what happened to the man, but once his body was found, he was cleared of suspicion right away (it was obvious the guy died naturally outside in the winter.)

He told me the story over one of our first dates, and I went wild looking online to make sure I could corroborate the story and I wasn't getting involved in something fishy.

Now it's just a sad/slightly ironic story (since he's the nicest, most trustworthy guy you could hope to meet) that he'll bring up when drinking occasionally.


36. Military Lock-Up


Confusing, mostly, since I wasn't being told what I was accused of.

I was in the army on a foreign post, when I was ordered to CID. I had to sign something acknowledging that I was being accused of a crime, but then I just sat around for hours waiting for someone to talk to me, wondering wtf this was all about.

Finally, someone showed up to interrogate me about the crime, which was a laptop stolen from a barracks room. Since I and 2 other soldiers had performed an inventory of the barracks furniture (and thus had access to every room for a day), we were the (only, I assume) suspects. Fortunately for me, the victim of the crime was a very good friend of mine, so I was able to tell the investigator that the laptop was stolen (and reported to CID) well before we went through the barracks.

He left the room to make a phone call, came back, and said we were free to go. Took less than 5 minutes.


35. What Happens When You're Younger Affects You Later On

I was 11 and was accused of busting the neighbors window. It sucked because I was friends with their son. The cops came and questioned me a bunch and I was nervous because I was being accused of something I'd never even consider doing. It didn't help that the cop was a fool. He was basically telling me I did it. It all turned out fine. I didn't get charged or have to buy a new window.

It just made me no longer be friends with the neighbor, and I lost a lot of respect for cops.


34. Now, On A Slightly Lighter Note

I was a suspect of tripping one of my friends on the playground back in 3rd grade. The school bully was the one who did it, but they knew to get out of sight fast and I was the first one blamed because I was walking next to the victim. I guess the significant impact on my life is that me and the accuser stopped being friends after that because I got detention.


33. A Young Life Torn Apart


I was once accused of setting my room on fire by the police. I wasn't home at the time and a 16 year old teenager who just lost my father to a heart attack 75 days before hand. My aunt had moved in several months before and had been having her birthday party.

I had asked to go to a friend's house after being there for a little while. While playing computer games at my friend's house I got a phone call that my room was on fire so I rushed on my bike back to see the fire department finishing up and the police investigating. The police told me they didn't believe that it was an accident, so they asked me to come to the station to answer some questions so we could figure out who did it. Being naive I agreed of course I will. We will definitely find out who did it, ask me anything.

I was not read my rights at all including that as a minor I have the right to a guardian present. It started out as a friendly sort of interview and I had no idea they suspected me, but it became clear that they did when they started yelling at me and accusing me.

They believed I set my room on fire because I wanted to hurt my family to which I responded if I wanted to hurt them why wouldn't I set a fire on the stairs so they couldn't escape? Their reply was that it was a cry for help and it was not too late for me. I responded that why would I set a fire in my room it has all my things in it... why wouldn't I set a fire somewhere else in the house.

I asked them for any evidence or proof because they were just blaming the teenager for something that happened when he wasn't even home. When I asked the fire investigator what he thought he said he thought I did it too, and the reason the fire started when I wasn't home was because I had been making bombs. I was shocked in disbelief.

The police then kept yelling at me to sign a confession and that everything would go easier for me once I signed it. I told them I've seen plenty of movies and the police always try to strong-arm confessions to the innocent just so they can get a conviction. It was almost humorous when they said this isn't a movie kid, except I had been crying my eyes out by this point.

After several hours of making a little boy cry without him cracking they'd let me go. I was a very good and boring kid who completely trusted authority figures before then... now I realize that anyone can be a liar, idiot. I never smoked, didn't have a drink until I was 21, worked full time, and for fun rode my bike and played with my pets. (Also I loved my pets... why would I endanger them?)

The fallout from this was that my aunt and uncle treated me like a monster until I moved out. It was only years later until after my aunt and uncle divorced that my aunt told me that my former Uncle knew that his friend had started the fire by doing drugs in my room while I wasn't home. The friend already had a record and would have gone away for a long long time so my uncle told him to get out of there and told the police he thought I started it to protect his friend. while I hate my aunt for many reasons it did sort of show why she never treated me nicely.

That friend later fell asleep while smoking which started a fire. His stepson died, his daughter was crippled, cats and dogs dead, and he himself is bedridden in a care home unable to speak. If he hadnt been such a wimpy loser who could take responsibility for his actions he would be out of prison and able to walk, and those children would be alive.

My life was changed, and not for the better. Im fine now, but this event made some struggles come back to bite me as a younger man. The only good adult out of all the friends and family and cops there was my old tae kwon do instructor. He fought the fire with extinguishers and saved my two cats hiding in my room. When I got there on my bike he was outside holding them both. He was a great man.


32. 30 Years Later...

Was arrested and charged with burglary. Got off when police admitted evidence was flawed.

Nearly 30 years ago, I quit a job shortly after there was a break in. (Small, high street employment agency, 5 of us in the branch) About two days after I quit, there was another break in and, whoever it was, torched the place, gutting the inside.

I was hauled into the local police station by the CID and spent a pleasant(/s) three days being interrogated by two detectives who were convinced I was their man. They had a small pane of glass that, while remaining intact, had been kicked in, so whoever it was, could gain access to the building. On the glass was a footprint form a training shoe that was the same brand and model as the ones I was wearing. They took my shoes (as "evidence") charged me with burglary (possibly expecting it would be easier to nail an arson charge after a conviction for this) and sent my shoes off to forensic along with the pane of glass.

About a month later, I appear at the magistrates court. Case is called, prosecutor asks to approach the bench - there's a huddle between the magistrate, the prosecutor, my lawyer and a junior member of the CID (not one of the ones who was interrogating me!) My lawyer came back grinning and said to me, "You're gonna love this..."

Turns out, the print showed it was the same brand and type of shoe. However, the print was from a size 8 and my shoes were/are a size 13. Case dismissed.

I did get to ask, loudly, "Can I have my shoes back, now?"

Magistrate grins, looks at the copper and says, "Well? Can he have his shoes back?"

I swear that copper blushed when he said, "Right away, your Honor."

And they'd even been cleaned, bless 'em.

Never been so grateful for having big feet. BardSinister

31. Detained.

I was briefly detained when I was younger for a crime that didn't even happen, but that the cops were hoping they could scare me into confessing to.

Didn't really affect my life much other than cementing my distrust of small-town cops since I've routinely seen them do asinine shit out of boredom.

I later learned that a lot of remote locations in large counties are where they send the cops that have disciplinary problems hoping the lower population density will reduce their ability to cause trouble. PaganJessica

30. My brother and I....


My brother and I went to this small charter school after my parents split. We both had long hair, black nail polish and eyeliner, listened to black metal etc. There were a few teachers that absolutely hated us, but my brother and I did well in school, we kept to ourselves and we never did anything out of the ordinary. The school gets news that a local church was burned to the ground, a teacher claims she saw my brother and I setting it on fire. The police of course get involved and start interrogating us on the spot. I was 14 at the time and my brother was 16, we were just kids.

Teacher goes on and on how she saw us carrying in gas cans. The fire department finally came back and said there were no signs of arson and the building went up in flames due to an electrical fire. I don't know what happened to the teacher, I think they made her take a leave of absence? The police department legit wrote us an apology letter.

It effected me because when a teacher calls us out and has the police rip us from the classrooms in front of other students, well, that'll do some damage. Even after that people still suspected it was us. I was so deeply hurt. My brother and I were total nerds, getting spelling bee awards when we were younger, basically being teachers pets.

I remember holding him crying thinking we'd go to juvey and that scared us. Bjorna_Gloom

29. School Daze.

My senior year of high school I was accused of threatening to let a bomb go off from a note that was found in the bathroom. It had a picture of how to construct a bomb and a threat that said "I will blow this school up" with my name on it. It was clearly the fakest thing ever, but the school was taking no chances.

I was held in a room for about 3 hours with two cops who talked about how I was going to be charged with multiple crimes and how my house was going to be searched despite my claims that I was innocent. I was handcuffed in a chair that was very uncomfortable as the cops told me about how I was going to be taken downtown. It was pretty terrifying I'll admit and it didn't help that the cops seemed to almost enjoy telling me about all the bad things that was going to happen to me. I just hoped that they would hopefully find out I didn't do it.

Eventually my best friend at the time confessed that it was him who put the note in the bathroom and after a little while I was able to leave. He was a close family friend and my family almost couldn't believe it, my Mom even cried, though my Dad wasn't too surprised. I have struggles to this day making friends because what happened, it's something that I still think about from time to time.

I think never really finding out why my friend did it haunts me more than being arrested itself. DemiAlabi

28. Special Stepmom.

My stepmom was a special type of person. After I came into her life her only goal was to make sure I was less successful than her son. This included accusing me of things I didn't do just to get me in trouble and ruin my reputation. I had been away 6+ years and thought it was all behind me but then I decided to have a child. She could not handle that I was having a kid before her son was. She accused me of stealing $20,000 dollars from a lock box in her room.

That would be a felony and 5 years in prison for me, she would have been thrilled. Luckily for me this wasn't the first time she accused me of stealing. She had accused me before of stealing money from my stepbrother in a successful plan to get my dad to stop paying for my college and eventually get me kicked out of the house. She made sure to spread the news and I was pretty much disowned from my family and lost a lot of friends. Never was able to finish college and was left to struggle on my own. But from researching what i should have done back then prepared me for the second time.

As soon as I herd what she was doing this time I got a lawyer, got together any evidence I could find to account for my whereabouts for the previous few weeks, printed out bank statements and any receipts of purchases I had made. Luckily they never even officially brought me in but it wasted a lot of time and money going through all that bull. Reading some of these stories I feel lucky i dealt with reasonable authorities but anytime you are accused of something like that even when innocent people don't look at you the same. For example a few months later at a family get together for the a holiday I went to use the upstairs bathroom, that was the one designated for pooping in, it was always the rule. When I was walking up I see my aunt shoot a look at my uncle and everyone got a little quieter.

Of course no one will say it out loud but they all thought I might steal something while up there alone, I come out of the bathroom to two of my uncles standing there for apparent reason and they follow me back down. From talking with my dad at the time it seemed like the 20k was really missing, how crazy do you have to be to actually throw out that kind of money for something like this. Crazy! Truedeal

27. Middle School is Rough.


Not a crime, but during middle School, my school was getting reports of kids being bullied (I was one of them) but the kids were too afraid to give names. I was the only one that went ahead and ratted the fool. Well, the school didn't care to protect my identity when confronting him and he told them that I was the bully. Them he proceeded to threaten all the other kids in my class to testify against me and free his butt.

This worked for a year. all kids avoided me like the plague and cause he would still keep bulling me and the school was thinking it was my fault. I was 13. Crazed_Archivist

26. Failure to Pay. 

I sold my house. Had to pay lawyer a bill. I paid in person with a cheque. A month later I got a debt collectors note for failure to pay or some such. Rang up. They had no record of payment. I had check stub and bank records. Ok, must have been the secretary. No biggie. Hang up. Next month. Get visited at work by a dude with a court summons. Umm. What? Apparently this is a bigger problem than I thought. Ring them up. They know what went wrong

They're just going to fix it on their end. Two weeks later. A police friend tells me there is an arrest warrant for me. I got a copy. I call up. Yep they still know the problem but the court date is next week so there's nothing they can do till then. Funny thing was, the summons and the warrant had my name spelled very wrong. It all went away the next week as promised but it was a strange ordeal.PapaOoMaoMao

25. Out of the Blue.


Out of the blue I had movie-style-debt-collectors harassing me for an unpaid doctor's bill. I never got a bill, never mind a second one or even a phone call. I hadn't gone to that doctor in years because I had moved (kept the phone number - they could have reached me).

Fun part: The bill was for a complete set of STD tests.

One of the employees had tested himself and tried to bill my insurance but it didn't go through because I was at a new job. They insisted it was me because "how else would we have your insurance info?" Uh... I used to go there, Einstein.

I'd be mad but it got sorted out plus the guy had herpes. KaraPuppers

24. I'm Sorry

I worked near a famous college at the time, and a student was murdered one weekend. A week or two later, the head of my department asked me to come to his office, and he whispered "I'm sorry" as we entered and saw a policeman waiting for us.

The officer told me they had an anonymous tip that someone working in my department matched the description of the suspect. He then asked me where I was on the date of the murder.

I said I don't know. He asked me if I had been to any parties near the college, and I said no. He thanked me for my time, and that was it.

I made sure everyone in my department knew about it, and I took full advantage of that encounter.

"Oh, is that the last donut you have there? Did I ever mention to you that I'm a murder suspect?" tourettes_on_tuesday

23. At Gun Point.

I was once pulled over at gunpoint.

It was back in HS, I was 18 and I didn't have a car so I was driving my mums yellow smart car of all things. It was around midnight, and I pulled over in a residential area to answer a phone call.

30 seconds in, and I am blinded by someone behind me, like someone pulled over with their brights on, I couldn't see a damn thing.

Then I see a car from the opposite direction swerve across the road in front of me, and stop diagonally. It puts on its mirror lights and I realize it's a cruiser. They point them at me, and I realize the other car is a cop too. There's two of them.

Next thing I know my door is pulled open, and an officer is grabbing me trying to pull me out of the car. I have my seat belt on, and am beyond confused. I see two other cops and they have their flashlights and guns pointed at my face.

I click my seat belt and am stolen from my car and my face is shoved into the side/roof of my mums car. They are all shouting and I have no damn idea what the heck is happening.

Through the ridiculous conflicting commands of 'hands behind your back!' And 'hands on your head!' They ask me what I'm doing. I am terrified. I tell them I'm answering a call, and they question if I'm on drugs, and why I was driving so late.

They claimed they thought I was selling drugs in the area, as it was near the local college. And I repeat, I was driving my mums yellow smart car.

Needless to say I was let go, but screw that, and boy do I distrust the crap out of cops. What if I got shot for that crappy police work.

Now my brother is an officer, so I don't know how to feel anymore. ConnorO79

22. Close the Gate.


In Kindergarten I was assigned to close the gate, and this girl Sabrin followed me. I started to close the gate and this girl opened it. After some back and forth she ran inside and said I was trying to open it while she was trying to close it. They immediately believed her possibly due to an unrelated event involving urine, and I was put on time out. This has pissed me off for the entirety of my life. MakerMaxC

21. A GTA. 

Told me I committed GTA cause my car matched the one at the scene of a crime. I asked if they had a description of the person and they said no. But they held me for a few and wanted to take my picture. I told them hell no and if they did I was gonna call a lawyer up. They let me go after trying to say I was lucky and that they could throw me in jail if they wanted. I didn't care. Just felt if they were gonna throw me in jail, they wouldn't make a big deal about it. Probably just wanted me to admit to something I didn't do. But it didn't affect me. I feel that, that's probably a tactic that works for them. So whatever. ItsKilLikeMine

20. "where were you on this day?"

I was a suspect in a murder. Young woman went missing (and hasn't been found some 20 years later). A blood trail was left behind at the scene. I had two detectives come to my house and question me. It was very daunting. One didn't acknowledge me and furiously scribbled notes. The other asked all manner of questions and watched me like a hawk. The only time scribbler looked at me was when they showed me a big photo of her. They asked questions like "where were you on this day?"

"Could anyone have access to your car?" (The type of car was witnessed). I got really nervous because it was a few weeks earlier and couldn't remember where i was. I yelled out to my girlfriend (who was lurking down the hall but unseen "where were we on December the 2nd?". Both coppers jumped up to check my girlfriend. Not the same person. They eased off a bit and explained a car like mine was seen, there were 3,500 of these cars and they were questioning everyone.

I worked and lived near where she was taken and had been pulled over by plain clothed cops a week or so earlier on my way home from work.

I didn't know her and turns out i was at work the day she disappeared. I still think about her and wonder what happened. I feel horrible for her family. I passed on unique car model features which i though might narrow the search for the cops but they never found her or the perp. masterjabbadad

19. A Jar of Lollies. 

When I was a kid I was accused by my parents for stealing a jar of lollies from a 1$ store. I'd been in the store at some stage with my stepdad and asked to buy them. He said no. Okay whatever. They assumed I'd stolen them then. In reality they were gifted to me by a friend for Xmas. I hid them in my room because I wasn't allowed anything sweet or sugary.

I told them that and they refused to believe me or follow up on it, just lots of yelling. I was put in the car by my step dad (whom I hated and did not get along with at all) and taken to the police station. He's yelling at me the whole way there trying to scare me etc. which worked. Suffice to say we never made it inside. I flipped. He's literally dragging me down the street while I'm screaming and fighting with ounce of might 9 or 10 year old me has.

He kinda looks around and stops (would've looked really bad from onlookers perspective), acts like he's won, punishment enough "you'll never do this again" kinda BS. We get back to the car and I don't say a word. Never forgave them for that, they lost all my trust that day. kiwifulla64

18. Steelwork is shady. 

Some friends and I were hanging on top of a steelwork building and we got chased from from the security guards. Before we knew it, there were police helicopters, dogs & vans after us. Turns out the steelworks was burgled a few nights earlier and they thought it was us.

One girl in our group couldn't run across the muddy fields because of her heels, so I stayed with her knowing she (we) would be caught by the oncoming police. Anyway, we got arrested and held in custody overnight, we were given paper clothes and shoes and bailed the next.

20 years later we have been married 15 years and have 5 kids. megabollockchops

17. 70 Days in County. 

I was arrested and charged with two felonies and a misdemeanor while at an acquaintances apartment. Everything was legitimately a misunderstanding. Spent 70 days in a county jail outside of my home state before it got cleared up. Screwed up my mindset a bit. Still have increased anxiety and aggression. It changed me for sure. d3dforlife


I was accused of taking the SATs for a bunch of kids and the school claimed to have all this proof. Except I was in the hospital after a car accident in a medically induced coma during those dates. [username deleted]

15. Pranks. 

One time, when I was in seventh or eight grade, me and my friend snuck out to egg the school on some random night. On our way there some older kids saw us and we told them what we were up to (because we were so bad). We went and did our dumb pranks and went home to bed, having no idea that later that night, someone else went back and smashed some windows at the school, doing thousands of dollars in damage.

Somehow our names got mentioned to the cops (probably from the older kids, who let's be honest, probably also broke the windows), and the cops came calling. They took me to the detachment and scared the ever living crap out of me, and when I told them I swore to god all we did was egg the school, they asked me if I'd be willing to take a lie detector test. I said I would, but it never came to that.

I don't know if they ever caught the person who actually did it. But I can tell you that being suspected of a crime you (mostly) didn't commit is not cool. BrowsingNewForYou

14. Against Your Will. 

It was kind of surreal. First you're held against your will. You tell the truth, but they don't believe you and they continue pressing to know more. It's so absurd to be asked the same questions and they expect different results. Laughable even, but they saw you smirk a little bit, you must be lying your mom thinks. But stand your ground and know that no matter the truth, the other side will think what they want, and if they hold more power your belief matters not.

I've had trust issues after that and being only 8-9 I don't even recall what she was after but I remember knowing for a fact I was telling the truth. Imakedo

13. The Edgy Skater Kid. 

In 5th grade I was the edgy skater kid who like to draw that stupid graffiti style "S" on all of my papers and stuff. One day I show up to school and a bunch of kids are looking at me weird. One of my friends comes up to me and asks if I did it. "Did what?" I asked genuinely curious. Turns out our schools mural had been tagged by someone and for some reason people thought a 5th grader would be responsible for that. Ended up talking with the principal and he either bought my story or just pretended that he did, understanding that there was clearly no evidence against me. The tag was actually pretty well done if I remember correctly, nothing a kid like me could have done.

Really made me feel like a criminal though. Not long after that I started doing stupid stuff as I was unsupervised due to my single mother working all the time. Ended up actually tagging some things, though it was rare cause I sucked. Got caught ditching school the next year and eventually got my butt sent to my Aunt's house. Unfortunately this was not in Bel Air, instead I moved from a nice city to awful Wyoming. Fixed me right up. PanthraxIV

12. The Eagle.

A few years back someone killed a Bald Eagle in my town and the feds came out. My cousin and a few of his friends, being the intelligent 16 year old boys they were made a crack that they had shot it (they had not). Someone else heard them and told the police. The boys got questioned about it.

I'm pretty sure they were put on a watch list because a few months later a buzzard was killed which is also illegal. The first person questioned was a guy (also a stupid teenager) whose buddies put it in the back of his truck. He had found it and posed with it and put the pic on facebook. My cousin and his friends were the next ones questioned. Thatonetwin

11. SWAT's here!


My sweet, innocent girlfriend was raided by a SWAT team because her ex at the time was a scumbag who decided to rob a couple stores at knife point early in the morning after a night of debauchery with his friend using my girlfriend's car as the getaway car.

My gf was just chilling making some art at around 11am I believe, the morning that the robberies took place and she noticed the house being swarmed by heavily armed officers and before she knew it the door was busted open and she had assault rifles pointed at her head and she had no idea wtf was going on.

To paint a picture on how screwed up her ex was, while the raid was happening she was yelling at him asking him what the hell was going on, she asked him "is it because I was smoking?" and her ex said "dunno probably." What a piece of crap.

She was brought to jail for a night and finally released when she was able to explain that she had no part in the robbery and didn't know that her ex was up to such awfulness. She left him not long after this obviously.

Sadly she has some anxiety / PTSD issues that have risen from the event but she is a strong girl and is moving on well with her life. I do my best to keep her happy and let her know I'm there for her and that she will never go through a crappy event like that ever again.

Her ex pled guilty earlier this year but we're not even sure if he got or is getting jail time. I hope he gets what he deserves. Reddit

10. It's always the Boss...

I was a person of interest in a murder investigation back in the late 90's. My former boss had murdered her two kids for the insurance money because she and her husband was going to have to file for bankruptcies.

I work at that company for about for six months, and I remember when I was working there every Friday the owner would take the managers out for lunch and when they can back to work, you knew that I had been drinking a lot. Also, I remember the clothes that she would wear to work, she would wear a high-end dress and jewels, and everybody knows she that gets weekly botox injections and also her breast was silicone. And this company that I work at was a manufacturing company that built circuit boards for AT&T cell phones, so you know that working there was also loud and dirty.

After I had quit that company, and about a month later I saw on the news that she had murdered her two older sons. And also about a week later a former coworker call us and told us that the cops had questioned him about the former owner and also give us a heads up that the cops meant be call us soon because he said that after the interview he pass by the cops office and saw on the board a bunch of pictures of former workers at that company and my picture was on there. So a bunch of us decided to go to the police station and talk to the cops about our former boss. And about three months later every one of us was cleared of the murder investigation. pulse2075

9. Get a Lawyer.

It feels like interrogators really want to just put the crime on the first person they feasibly can instead of doing actual work.

Always get a lawyer people, no matter how air tight your alibis are. Emperor_Nihilist

8. Forced Adventures. 

My ex and a couple of her friends framed me with intent to purposely make my life hell. It's an awful feeling. Public opinion is a hell of a thing to have against you if you're just some regular person.

I lost my job. I lost sleep. I lost my mind because of it. On top of this, I was a single dad trying to keep my two kids from realizing what was going on. We would go on "adventures" and stay at various friends' houses or motels to keep them from realizing there was no electricity or running water at home. runningfisk

7. Stolen/Found...

Was (indirectly) the main suspect in a murder case at the age of 12, because a homeless guy who was murdered had stolen/found my lost keys several months before. It was the only lead they had and someone linked the electronic key to my school. My name was registered under my name, so i was pulled out of class to speak with a police officer and a psychologist.

They told me someone had been murdered a week before, which i hadn't heard about. Since i knew i hadn't killed the man, whom i had no other connections to, i tried to stay calm and cooperated answering all their questions and describe my keys before identifying. It helped that it was 2 very kind ladies in civilian clothing.

They let me go after 45 min and told me i was no longer a suspect. Returned to class pretty out of it but calmed down after talking to my parents and the teacher.

Makes for a fun story at parties, and my dad still has a screenshot from a news site with the headline "KEY OWNER POSSIBLE MURDER/SUSPECT." HeluniasRose

6. Dark Days.

There's a fantastic book on this topic titled 'Dark Days' by Randall D. Blythe. He was accused of killing a fan during one of his gigs in the Czech Republic and subsequently imprisoned, without notice, when they landed at the airport heading to their next gig in the country. henrihell

5. 911 Blazing In!


It sucked. Quick rundown: I was picking a friend up and cracked out dude who just broke into their dealer neighbors house tries to car jack me. Like an ongoing battle that lasted close to 10 minutes. Got a call out to 911. They came blazing in. Somehow my car jacking wasn't put it the paperwork and the next day the police came looking for me.

I wasn't home but went down to the station thinking they were going to ask me about the Dude (he got away) only to be accused of being there to buy. I'm a giant 420 fan but the neighbor wasn't my dealer. The cops were saying my friends were buying from the guy and I was there to do the same thing. All bull because I was picking up for them lol. They kept me for almost an hour and finally let me head home when I was able to convince them I was just an innocent bystander. Siray

4. Top This!

Top this anyone! Someone once reported that I looked like Bin Laden's #2, the explosives expert last seen in Somalia or something. The FBI showed up at my work. I'm not even Arab, I'm Mexican. Apparently, the person who reported it later retracted the statement but finding such a high ranking Al Qaeda member in Orange County, California was far too juicy a lead to pass up.

We all had a good laugh, including my boss. After a week though she fired me and told me to "go away you dirty terrorist." Okay that last part didn't happen. uReallyShouldTrustMe

3. Sorry Dad.

Not me but my dad... he was arrested for armed robbery before I was born. Apparently, according to police he was the spitting image of the suspect. The only reason they let him go was because he had (still has) a debilitating stammer, there is no way he could get the words out.

"Th.. th. this.. is a r..r..robbery." Willfy

2. The Runaway.

I was accused of harboring a runaway. She had runaway to her boyfriends to get knocked up, but left a letter saying she was at my house.

Police knocked on my door. Said she wasn't here and I'd been at an internship all day so clearly her letter about me picking her up was a lie.

They left and found her at her boyfriend's.

Not really a crime, but kind ehh. I thought it weird the police falsified evidence that I'd been calling her every day for a month when I hadn't spoken to her since high school graduation three months ago. fudgyvmp

1. The Thief.


Someone stole A LOT of money at the last company I worked at and did so under my numbers and log in credentials. The cops were brought in along with high up corporate bosses and company lawyers to break down to me what would be happening, No matter what I said they just did not give a crap or believe me.

That feeling of knowing you're 100% innocent but are going to be prosecuted for something you didn't do was sinking, thankfully the guy who did it, did it again under another employees numbers and was caught. The company was man enough to apologize and hook me up with some paid time off for the stress. Swarhammer

Ever had a crime pinned on you? Let us know below!

H/T: Reddit

Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like


My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308


My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango


I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina


With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3



I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold


Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.

I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-


Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.

An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451


Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence


How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster


My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"



It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?


I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)

The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.


Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.

I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.


Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.


Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.



Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.




3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.


Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.


Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.


Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.



My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.



How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).

How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.


Dogs and Chocolate


I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.


Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.


Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.


Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.


Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.


Stars In Their Multitude


I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.



My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.


Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.


Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...


Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.